This article was originally published in Deseret News by Liz Stitt. Below is an excerpt.
So you sent a smile to that girl? You swiped right and matched? And now you want to know what to do?
According to the Pew Research Center, 38 percent of Americans who are single and actively looking for a partner have used online dating services. Among young single adults who are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the use seems to be rising as free, no-contract services become more available.
Yet entering the world of online dating can be confusing and downright scary.
For all those YSA men out there, here’s some advice on how to enter the online dating world or improve your online dating experience, based on many conversations I’ve had with my like-minded female YSA friends. (All names have been changed.)
Profile pictures
Everything you post says something about you, for good or ill. The profile picture is the first introduction, so make a good first impression.
1. Clear pictures. Post pictures that look like you, show you and are not blurry. Avoid group photos or pictures of you in sunglasses or a helmet or anything that hides your face.
2. No selfies. Especially mirror and gym selfies. Consider this from one of your potential matches, Rachel: “Selfies — shudder — come off as desperate, shallow and prideful. If this is who you really are, then feel free to include them, and if you really are desperate, shallow and prideful, you won’t care about being perceived that way.” If you really don’t have any friends who can help, grandmas are really good at taking pictures with phones these days.
3. Shirts on. Unanimous approval on this one from the kinds of LDS women you’re hoping to attract. As Lissa said, “If you are seriously looking for a relationship, avoid any pictures with your shirt off, where you’re doing any kind of pout or duck face, or that are taken in the bathroom mirror. No self-respecting girl wants to show that photo to her future grandchildren. (e.g. ‘This is the picture that made me fall in love with Grandpa. Check out those abs!’ No.)”
4. Interests. Post pictures of your interests. But just a note: you aren’t the only guy who has taken a picture with a snake around your neck or with a tiger. Where are you all finding the tigers anyway?
5. Children. If you put pictures of kids, we’ll think they’re yours, unless you state otherwise.
6. Pictures with arms around girls. Why are you trying to get a girl if you already have one?
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