Church Stories That Will Literally Make You Laugh Out Loud

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Giulianna Collato

Joined: Jan 2015
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This article has been shared here by permission of the author. The original article can be found at LDSSmile.com

So we have posted some of the funniest comments that were made. Also, if you have any stories of your own, feel free to post them in the comments below and we’ll share them in a future post.

The Note Taker

I remember how scared I was for the longest time in Sacrament meeting because when I was being loud my older sisters told me to be quiet and that if I wasn’t quiet, “The Note Taker” would write down my name on his little list and after Sacrament meeting I would have to sit in time out in his office.

Even now that I’m a bit older, I still have flashbacks to when I was little watching the ward clerk.

What Would Jesus Do?

My kids were fighting over the crayons during Sacrament meeting and I grabbed both of them and told them to stop fighting.  I asked them what they thought Jesus would do?  Would Jesus share with His siblings? My son turned to my daughter and said “ok, you be Jesus.”

Jesus’ Father

I asked my Sunday school kids one time what was Jesus’ mother’s name? One of the kids answered, “Mary.” Then I asked them  if anyone knew who Jesus’ Father’s name was to which the same kid replied “Verge.” I asked him why he thought that was His name and he said “my Catholic friends are always talking about Verge and Mary.”

Nephew

One time my sister and her family came and visited us from California.  During Sacrament meeting my nephew threw some won tons at the family in front of us.  My sister told me that she was sorry that her son threw won tons at the family.  I looked at her and said “but that still doesn’t explain why you brought won tons?”

Old Man

We had an old man in our ward who would always fall asleep during every Sacrament meeting. One Sunday, the speaker talked about how his dad used to wake everyone who had fallen asleep during his talk by getting a paper bag and popping it.  So he proceeded to pop the bag and the old man in front of me who had been sleeping stands up and screams “OH MY LANS!  WHAT’S GOING ON?”

My family

My son was crying after I picked him up from Primary and his teachers said that they weren’t sure why he was crying.  I kept on asking and finally when we were in the car he cried out “I don’t want to live in a Christian home, I want to live with my family!”

Candles

There are not a lot of Mormons down here in the south and so we often would attend choir concerts in the evening performed by the choirs of the differing religions around us. My entire family was visiting from Utah and California and they came with us to a choir concert.

At one point during the concert, they had dimmed the church lights and and the choir members were holding candles and started to walked down the center aisle in a single line. As they were walking by, it was so quiet and reverent and then all of a sudden my niece yells out “Happy Birthday to you…Happy birthday to you…” We were all pretty embarrassed.

Ankle biter

“When a friend of mine was a toddler, she used to sneak underneath the benches and crawl around biting women’s ankles. Sometimes her parent wouldn’t notice until they heard a yelp from two rows back. Her ward nicknamed her ‘Baby Jaws’.”

Justin Bieber

“While the young men were passing the Sacrament, the High Councilman’s phone went off. All of a sudden you could hear the words ‘Baby, baby, baby ohhhh like baby, baby, baby.’ Yeah, he had a Justin Bieber song for his ringtone.”

Republished From: LDSSmile.com