Stacey_Jay

Is there any chance you could get married civilly and then be sealed later? That way, everyone wins. Your families can attend, and then when you do get sealed you can focus on that just the two of you without worrying about the family that arent allowed to attend? Thinking of my own wedding in the UK-We do this but are allowed to get sealed on the same day, I really dont know why its different for America, it seems desperately unfair. I would have been extremely upset if I didnt have a wedding. It breaks my heart to think people miss out on this. I cant give any advice on a ring ceremony, as Ive never been involved with one. Id say have a proper wedding, and get sealed after. Once you've got married, you realise how fast a year goes and it would be something to look forwardf to. Just my thoughts :)

I agree that BY was wrong in what he taught concerning the Adam-God theory, and all what you say. But in that case, this confuses me with the authorities-if BY was wrong, desperately wrong, who's to say that what the prophets teach us now is also wrong? Do we have to pray and ask for confirmation of every single little thing they say? Yet the scripture says that if it comes from the mouth of one of my servants its the same as God speaking himself? This is so confusing to me, it cannot be both. This is an example of the church contradicting itself. What to do? Lol, so I have to go through something hard to believe? I think I have had many trials of faith. Maybe its now.

Mike, I really connect woth what you're saying. I have been on and off in the church my whole life and so have been reading this thread with interest. At one point, I truly did believe the church is true, and my feeling that it was, was at one time enough to me to answer difficult questions. Now, not so much. I need to have answers, and telling me to pray or read my scriptires, or just a blanket of answer of 'the church is true so it doesnt matter' type responses only serve to increase my frustration. I think where I am in the church at the moment is: Id like it to be true, but Im not sure if it is. Even if it is true, I dont know if I can stand to belong to an institution that gives a pure whitewashed bubble-gum version of its history to attract members. I really feel so uncomfortable with that. When I discovered certain things about the church, I was deeply shocked and upset and very confused. There are certain aspects of the church that I think must make it true-the Book of Mormon. I dont feel Joseph could have written it himself. No teenager could come up with that. Yet on the other hand, if it is true, why do we never ever speak about the stone in the hat? My patriarchal blessing-its such a small thing but still niggles at me-it said to 'continue with the genealogy work you enjoy'. I had never met the patriarch before till that day. I was doing genealogy and really enjoying it at the time. How could he know that? On the other hand, some things it says are absolutely false. Confusing. Im not sure if the temple is from God, and I was deeply deeply disturbed by the old tempple death rites. It made me feel very uncomfortable-very dark and sparked off one of my periods of inactivity. Im too scared to go back there, its too overwhelming. Its too similar to masonry, so Im not sure if I can accept its from God. Yes I have prayed hours and hours over this and no answer ever came. I have fasted once and fainted so I wont be doing that again. And no answer came. When I have put these questions to people they usually say I dont have enough faith which I find incredibly insulting. How do they know how much faith I have? I have it in buckets buyt I am also an educated woman who can read and think for herself. I don't let the church do the thinking for me. Having said all this, I find myself still drawn to the church. Maybe its habit, familiarity, Im not sure. Im also not sure if Ill ever gain an answer to my questions. Prayer etc has not worked and members dont have the answers either. So I suppose I will only find out when I die. Until then, I have to decide how to live my life, and that has been the ongoing challenge for me. Its very difficult. Mike, I really understand where you are coming from. Its so hard. *sigh* Some things in life we will never know. Perhaps I just need to accept the church is one of them and move on with my life. So they are my reasons for leaving the church (on and off!) anyway.

I smoked during my teen rebellion. But I was never addicted. I just did it to be cool. I stopped when I wanted to with no problems. jbs is right, it depends whether u have an addictive personality or not. A support group might help so u can help each other.

Interesting hread. I too have always had problems with prayer. Ive never felt Ive got anything out of it, or answered. I feel a little silly truth be told, talking to someone who isnt there. I never know what to say either, or even what to pray about. When I do get down to pray my mind goes blank, I never have anything to say. The visualising ideas are good. I still feel a little uncomfortable praying though.h

I never got used to the garments either. I too swore I would't wear them after my endowment. I did, but dont so much these days. Its been stunningly gorgeous english weather lately getting upto 30 degrees so I havent worn them lately. Im glad you had a good experience. Congratulations.

I just feel its our choice whether to do these things or not. They may be commandments but its upto us to decide if we live it. By the way, what does tax have to do with tithing?????

I think you are worrying about other people too much, and it can come accross as a bit self righteous. People do not have to turn upto ward activities. People are allowed to have a life outside of church. Plus, you say its a singles ward. Most people will be young and enjoying going to uni and having freedom for the first time. There's nothing wrong with that. Give them a break! If you want to attend everything and do what you're doing good for you. Just dont judge people by your standards. People have their own choice.

Shrinking. We've had 4 families move out of the ward in the last year. Most converts dont stay long and the ones scheduled for baptism have all pulled out. We get about 60 people on an average Sunday.

I dont have children myself, but our education system works differently. Here, kids go to nursery at around 2 years old. they start school at 4, in reception which is i suppose the american version of kindergarten. I would definitely send my children to nursery as I would not want them to be at a disadvantage when they start school. I think English kids start school earlier than most countries but I think its the best way. We have an American girl in our ward and she said the english education is much better than what she had in the states. She said you could almost get through school without even looking at a map!!!! I thought she was joking at first. So based on that analysis, I would send my kids to nursery. Its only 2 or 3 half days a week anyway.

No one has the right to judge you or make you feel guilty for not paying tithing-including yourself! Its an intensely private and personal thing. Loudmouth, why would you need a list of people who didnt pay? Im just curious as to what the bishop would do with that information. Ive always felt uncomfortable with the way tithing is handled and processed. I think there should be like a collection jar like they do in other churches-it would have to be cash-that people can donate anonymously. I really dont get tithing settlements and such. Really, why do they have to know? I think anonymous donantions are better.

They are the ones missing out :)

It better be a joke daniel, as Ive been waiting ages to see this film-It comes out on Friday here and we are going to see it for our wedding anniversary :) I LOVED batman begins I thought it was one of the best films Ive ever seen, so I am very excited to see this one. In fact, I will watch batman begins again tonight seeing as Ive been reminded of it!!! I looooove Christian Bale-he's a brit dontcha know?!!

seriosusly?? That is outrageous. How shallow minded can some people be?! Also just because you've been on a mission doesnt make you a wonderful brilliant person-I know a few 'RMs' who are idiots!!!!

So far, no one I have spoken to has been able to answer my questions. My bishop just tells me to pray and read my scriptures-this is half the problem, ive done it for years and gained nothing from it. I have more specific questions that can't be answered by prayer. Anyhow, thanks for the address.