Art_in_Heaven

At the same time, I am Mark the English.

I am Art in Heaven.

If you were without sin you would be Jesus, but you're not, you're just a man, and you're weak, just like the rest of us. So, to the rest of the guys out there, who wants to cast the first stone? I certainly don't!

I think some sites are set up by people who were never really LDS/Mormon and they have an agenda, whether it be hate or political or both I don't know. There are also sites set up by people who really do have hatred for the LDS/Mormon way through bad experiences, and the sites are a kind of catharsis for the individuals/groups concerned. I was baptised a catholic, and when I was a child I fell victim a couple of times to predatory paedophiles who were priests. It is my opinion that the Catholic church spent many years protecting these scum and many more in their ranks. There have been several major scandals since then but it still goes on. I could have walked the path that led me to shout from the rooftops about my hatred for priests and the church itself, but the fact is that I don't hate all priests and I don't hate the Catholic church. Not every Catholic I ever met was cruel to me and I held on to that. not everyone can. I'm not saying that the reason some people grew to hate their Mormon faith was due to sexual abuse, there are surely many reasons why people lose faith, I'm just putting forward what happened to me and how I could have taken either path. I would like to say that I feel I'm a quite tollerent person, and I've forgiven many things and many people (myself included), over the years, but as an adult I did chance to meet one of the priests concerned, and despite how awful this may sound, I'm happy to say that he has been wheelchair bound since that meeting, and because of my actions during that meeting. What I'm trying to say is that my hatred was for that individual and one other only, but some people just seem to have to lay total blame on all they see before them, and that is why they go to such lengths to attack them, not just LDS but all religions.

He was counting his blessings?????? Oh pass me a bucket!

There is poverty and starvation everywhere in the world. What can we do to help all of them?

Told you!

Here's an easy one in the mean time. A cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays Two days and rides out on Friday. How?

"Sugarchris"?????? Getting a bit fresh there aren't we?

He went and got a replacement from a jewellry store.

"May the saddest day of your future be no worse than the best day of your past. " I love that!

Is it just me or did anyone else think "Troll" when they read the OP's opening post and every other post after that? Maybe I'm just too cynical......

You need to get that checked now! Are there any free clinics in your area? I'm sure they can help. Good luck to you.

After that joke they need to put a "Groan" button next to the two for "Thanks" and "Laugh"! :)

Hello everyone. I'm Mark, I'm English, (NOT British). I was born on the Isle of Sheppy, Kent 49 years ago. I've lived in a few different countries over the years due to my father being in the Army, and in teen and later years traveling Europe sometimes by myself and other times with friends. My interests include reading, cinema, electronics and music. I have a serious passion for Classical music, but I'm also a bit of a metal head, and I'm really into a band from your side of the pond called Disturbed at the moment. I currently live in the city of Birmingham, which looks quite beautiful at the moment as it's snowbound. It's nice to meet you all.

Thank you both so much. As Solihull is quite close to where I live so I will head in that direction.

I'm kind of interested in learning more about LDS. I wondered, could anyone tell me where I might find a temple or meeting place here in Birmingham?

Drop the radio into a bucket of water while it's still plugged in and invite him to retrieve it.

and then the fight started -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust. And then the fight started... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds. I bought her a scale. And then the fight started... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station. And then the fight started... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunk n lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since. 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please. " He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" Nah, she can order for herself. And then the fight started... ------------ --------- --------- --- I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And then the fight started.... ------------ --------- --------- --------- ----- My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday and then the fight started..... ------------ --------- --------- --------- ------ Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible. My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?' And then the fight started ..... ------------ I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?" And that's when the fight started.... ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ----

If ever there was a joke looking for a fist fight it's this one! Male Vs. Female At The Atm Machine -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.' 'After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.' MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5 Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. ********************************************** FEMALE PROCEDURE: Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth!!!! 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary; with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided! 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Redial person on cell phone . 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake.

A Russian couple walking down a street in Moscow, when the man feels a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he says to his wife. "No, that feels like snow to me, dear," she replies. Just then, a minor communist party official walks towards them. "Let's not fight about it," the man says. "Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing." "It's raining, of course" Comrade Rudolph says and walks on. But the woman insists, "I know that felt like snow." To which the man quietly says, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

ʎɐqǝ uo pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʎnq ı ǝɯıʇ ʇsɐן ǝɥʇ sı sıɥʇ

I'm very sad for you, but I have to say that the first time your wife told you "I need space", it was already over. The whole needing space thing is a complete cop out. It's a cowards way of saying "I no longer need you". It's a phrase used to make you feel that you're at fault and to make you feel defensive and that it's you that needs to work on things. From what you say your wife let you dangle on a rope of blame for a year before doing what she should have done in the first place, LEFT! It IS a cliche, but time does heal and life really is a lesson we have to learn, and sometimes it's a harsh one, believe me, I know just how harsh it can be. It's obvious that you have friends here on this forum, and you have your church. Talk to people, you will be surprised how many of them are willing to listen.