GingerGolden

Hello & Welcome Unser! Just curious, what does your user name mean?

Perhaps it is a form of Sara/Sarah.My oldest is named Sara which means a gift from God. * I think your name is pretty!

Mawmaw's tip for curing to much salt. Toss in a few cut up potatoes and they will soak up the extra salt, unless you just have total brine from an overdose of salt.

*totally Cackles*

I agree, it is not asking to much at all. I'm sorry that you are feeling this way about someone you love dearly. However, it is alright to take care of Jolee now...

Yes, she probably could, if she wants to. You cannot make her, obviously. Although, you do have her best interests at heart, this is something that she will have to do for herself. Depression is a cold, lonely road, but it can be worked through. If you feel you have done what you can, there is no need for you to be drug down into a depression concerning the situation yourself.

I can feel your sense of feeling burned out. This is the biggest reason I said it is OK to "Let It Go". (this may not mean forever, but just let go of the feelings you have for being responsible for what she may or may not do) I know you love this person and she means a lot to you. Have you ever considered that maybe she feels like she can count on you to be there for her and if you sorta drop back a bit that it may just make a real difference for her? Maybe she would start thinking that she really should get her act together, if she thought that by not taking care of herself, she may loose you as a close friend. Of course, it is up to you to think, ponder and pray about the best way to do whatever you need to do and then make your own decision. I am not saying you don't have to care about her or not be her friend, just back off a bit and well simply let go of whatever it is that makes you feel like you have to keep trying, if she's not going to try to help herself. ~~~ Cool story about the jumpsuits, it shows that you are in sync with one another.

Jolee, I don't think that you sound like you think you are better than her, it is also viewable that you care about this person, especially considering that you have been friends with her for more than 20 years, that does say a lot, as far as I am concerned. You can still be her friend and still care about her. She does need you and there must be something inside you that needs her. What I mean is that, it is ok to just let her know that you do care about her but that you aren't able to continually deal with her problems. I for one wouldn't have been able to stay around the cat hair, but that is simply because I'm allergic to them and their hair. It makes me physically ill and well it smothers me as well, having cat hair in your eyes, mouth and tongue from being around them or their hair, is not so pleasant or healthy. Unfortunately, for me, I've had to deal with my sister and the mess she and her kids left here inside the house and outside on the land of my mother's property. I had no choice to tell her yes or no she could stay, that was mother's choice. Of course, she knew how my sister was and the things she does and how she has raised her children. And of course, like me, mother had no idea that my sister could be so violent as to try to attack my 8 year old and to actually beat me nearly to death (she actually attacked my twice, since after doing so the first time, she still tried to get into the room where my child was to get to her and I would not let her in there with my child. I took 2 beatings in the face and head, but I'd take them again in order to keep my child from taking even one. But the second time, my mind was screaming "If she keeps this up she will kill me." and I squatted down trying to get away from her, but if she had gone after my child again, still she would have had to go through me to do so.) So now, I'm trying to work and clean up a humongous mess that was left inside and outside. It makes me ill since I've already cleaned up so many messes that belong to other people and it is disheartening to have to do so. But there is no one else to do it for me or my mother. My point is that sometimes it is perfectly fine to "Let Something Go". Tough Love is not only hard for those who have it done for them, it is extremely hard for those who do care to provide Tough Love. If we do all we possibly can to be there for others and do for them, support them, we have done our part. We have to stop at some point and take care of our own self in various manners. If that means gaining a peace of mind and heart, as long as you know that you have done what you can and let them know that no matter what choices they make you still love them. It is ok to let go of it, regardless of what anyone else may consider. I do agree, talking things over is always a good thing, or should be. I can tell you care about this person. It's ok to take care of yourself now.

It sounds to me like you have done the best you can to be a friend to this person. It's ok to let it go now, you are not responsible for her or her deeds. Just let her know that you do care about her and then go on with your own life. It is good to try to help others, however they have to be willing to help themselves. You've done your part, you have permission to move on in your own life.

Yes that too, I know where you get that, yes that is the same...I can't tell you whether or not you would know. I think you would, however I also know that some people don't realize that they are. I also know that even though my father has crossed over that sometimes he is around us. Shedding your body will not make you lose your parents. At least I don't think you will. They are yours, they are yours for a reason, just as you are theirs... I'm sorry that you are feeling this way. Can you tell us what is wrong, if there is something wrong? I'm fixing to head to bed, but don't want to leave you feeling so alone and anxious. I also agree with Therauh.

Can I just leave you a HUG? I'm not sure what to tell you... Do you believe in the pre-existence? (That is one of the biggest things that stood out to me about the church when I was learning about it. It makes soooooo much good sense to me. I had wondered why other churches hadn't considered it, well none that I'd ever known of before finding the LDS church.) If you believe that you were before you came here to get your body, you can believe that your spirit is a forever essence. Our bodies are vehicles in a sense, a means of maneuvering on this plane. Consider this. Find a photo of yourself, say to the photo. "God made you special, he loves you and so do I." Tell yourself that when you are feeling low. He does you know... I do hope this helped in someway...

hmmm... Well, I wasn't sure what to call myself. My name is Ginger, my hair is Golden in the sun. Simple as koolaid pie! Koolaid Pie Recipe 1 can of sweet condensed milk 1 pack of Koolaid (your favorite of course) 1 small container Cool Whip 1 graham cracker pie crust In a bowl, mix together sweet condensed milk and Koolaid Get your pie crust out and ready. Mix Cool Whip in with the colorful milk/Koolaide mixture It will begin getting stiff Plop into crust Cover and put in frig Eat & enjoy! Kids of all ages generally love this! We make them at Christmas, and other times for a treat. *edit to explain avy: I like stained glass, purple and think peacock feathers are pretty. I went searching for stained glass avys and this is the one I choose to use here.

Domestic abuse is dangerous, I guess mostly since the abuser lives right there with you and even though you are being abused, the heartstrings of those abused are being pulled every which way. An abuser who lives right in the same house with you knows better than anyone what buttons to push and they recognize and know your weaknesses more easily. An insider is an insider... Being abused by someone you love can really throw you for a spin. You feel embarrassed or shame, when it really isn't yours to own, it is something that has been forced upon you. In this lifetime as one who is being abused, I stood in the place of being a daughter of an abuser, a wife of an abuser, a girlfriend of an abuser and now a sister of an abuser. And if we want to get right down to the nitty gritty, I have also suffered emotional and psychological abuse and threats that I'd never be believed over her, from a very clever paternal grandmother, starting from a very young age, every chance she got me alone. One thing I don't understand is how some people when they are talking to someone who has been abused is the use of the phrase, "Why do you allow this to happen?" Ummm, well, excuse me, I have never allowed anyone to abuse me. Never once did any of them ask my permission. Never once did I grant them permission to do so. Twice were blood related, the first, well I was a child, how much control does a child have over their parents? In the home I was raised in, NONE! The other two times, it was like they only showed me one side of themselves and then came running in out of left field as if they were someone I didn't even know. Allow is not the right word to use here, it makes it sound as if the one being abused has willingly with eyes wide open, chosen to take on such a matter as being beaten or broken in some manner. For some, this may be true, however I do believe for the most part, sane individuals will never choose to allow or give permission for someone else to abuse them. Never once did it cross my mind that I was in the presence of an abuser until it was too late. Never once did I make a conscious choice knowing what they were or had in store for me. I'm not even sure it was something they may have even recognized in themselves. Not once did anyone come to me and say, You know what, that person is an abuser, they will hurt you. No, I did not give them permission/allow to do this to me. They made that choice themselves, for whatever their reason. However, the most important thing is to stop the abuse and not allow it to continue it's cycle. It is essential to get help, even if you do feel heartache or embarrassment. And if it is domestic abuse it is imperative that you press charges before that 24 hours has passed since it then drops down to being only a simple assault. I'll hush now..

Hi Pam. I just went to the website contact link and chose feedback and left a note for them there. There is also a link for their various emails, but I opted for the website feedback form.

Thank you HavingSomething for posting this. It has only been a few weeks that the knots and bruises to my own face and head have finally gone away. Unfortunately, I am still suffering from really bad headaches and strange dizzy spells that make me feel like I am walking out of my own self, as well as messing up my eyesight and sinuses. (Yes, I have had priesthood blessings - 3 so far) These were incurred while trying to protect my 8 year old daughter from being attacked by my 46 year old sister. I had simply taken my sister by the elbow when I realized she was fixing to attack my child, and said, "Wait (her name)" When she spun around and went to beating me in the face and head with her fists. A minor child came running up and began beating me in the head and face with her fists. I only wanted them to stop. I did not try to really fight them back, since I wasn't wanting anyone to be hurt, especially by me. Her children think it is just soooo funny that big ole aunt Ginny got beat up by their nearly wasted to skin and bones addict mom, but what they don't realize is that I Chose not to hit. I could have hurt her just as badly, but I chose not to harm them. I didn't want to have to sign papers on my sister, since I figured it would only make things worse for us all, especially my children. I should have signed papers that very day to have it considered Domestic Violence, but because I waited, for not having the heart for the deed, it is only simple assault. I also got an eviction notice for her that same day. She thought that since this is mother's property that it was no good, but I had spoken with our mother before I did anything. My sis did not show up for court. A deputy came and made her and her kids leave after witnessing even more threats and brutality from her and her kids towards me and my children. Some of her things are still here, they came here yesterday and wanted to get their things, she sent one of her daughters in here to ask me if they could. I told her I wasn't putting up with any garbage from anyone, any more, and if they could act civil, they were more than welcome to come in and get their things. As I was talking to my niece, my 8 year old went to the door to wave and she stepped back and said "Momma, Aunt ____ just flipped me off" I told my niece, no that they were not coming in now, that there was no need for my sister to take out her anger on my 8 year old and that they should leave. I also told her to tell her mother if she keeps flipping off children, that she would lose the use of that hand. Not because of something I would do to my sister, but eventually the ugliness that she's throwing off with such a nasty gesture towards innocent children would render that hand worthless to her. I love my sister and I love her children. Unfortunately, she brought them up to vulgar and vile in their thoughts and deeds. I was trying to help them and like a pack of hungry dogs they turned on the hands that was offering them more than they had. Trying to help her get back up on her own feet, did more harm to me and my children than good. I now regret having tried to help them. If I thought for one moment that she would ever pay for a Dr. I'd go, but she won't and I haven't the money to go either. Right now, all I can do is try not to push myself into exhaustion, which I have done already, since I do need to work. And trust that Heavenly Father knows what is best and will help me feel better both physically and spiritually. Thank you Having for posting this Hero site link. I do identify very much with how she feels and the art she is creating. And for posting this thread, since I did need a means of getting it out. My 8 year old and I are seeing a Church Counselor concerning all this and I do believe it is helping. ~~~ For any of those who are suffering, know that you are not alone, and believe me it means a great deal to know that you are not alone. We deserve much better than this and there are others who do care. Know that! Talk to your Bishop, Branch President as well as a Counselor and make sure you and your children are safe.

You are just too funny captmoroniRM! * of course, that is simply my own opinion... Thanks for the laugh!

Oh my goodness, that is so very sad... * this post is in regards to Loudmouth's posting of the other links

I found this first thing this morning from my ISP website, upon coming online. I am totally shocked that this has happened within a church building and during a church service. I read the story from my ISP website and followed the link to the church website. I did click on their website feedback link and left them a comment as well as a prayer for their members. I just feel so sorry for these people to have sat and witnessed such a shocking portrayal and I am especially concerned for the children who were present.

"if I judge you, the way I judge you, is the way I will eventually be judged since that is the way I understand being judged." I do believe that is about the same thing I said, only in different words perhaps. Of course, I am myself and no other, therefore I can't answer for anyone else. Oh, my yes, I do know that there are evil people, just recently I found myself having to press assault charges on one of my own sisters. I did not want to have to do so, but knew that if I did not, then my children would learn that it is perfectly fine to beat one another nearly to death. That is not something I want my children to grow up thinking is acceptable, to me or to society as a whole. ...and of course, there have been others whom I've come across as well in the past...

My understanding of this scripture is that the way we judge others is the way we will be judged, considering that it is the way we understand that which we judge. In other words, if I judge you, the way I judge you, is the way I will eventually be judged since that is the way I understand being judged. One of the most important things our Savior said is, "As I have loved you, love one another." I understand this to mean unconditionally loving others. If we love one another unconditionally, then our own judgment is more tempered with unconditional love. Right?

Just one as long as she indeed has an extra light bulb and the step stool to reach the light. Any others there are there for moral support.

Aye Cap'n that little matey there of yore may be a great mouser! * Unfortunately, I'm one of those matey's that are allergic to such critters. I'd have to have along a handy dandy Dr. with his handy dandy needle and med's to make the hives & terrible itching disappear. We have had a cat outside once long ago, a good mouser who taught all her litters how to be good mousers. Unfortunately, now the cousins who live just a stones throw away where we live now enjoy bringing home every stray they find, unfortunately those are mostly great big dog's who usually don't let any cats stay around here for fear of becoming dinner themselves. Therefore, for us/me, it is best to use the herbs. But, I do agree you can't beat a good mouser! ~~~ If anyone's interested in finding more herbs you might try googling: herbs + pest control (Arrrrr, connection being interrupted again. * Kicks connection interrupter)

Hello & Welcome Katrina! Just take it one step at a time, one day at a time.

Hi, not sure if this has been mentioned here or not... However, I thought maybe some may be interested in some natural means of keeping the critters out of the food storage. If you place mint leaves or bay leaves on the shelves or areas that you keep your food storage in, they will help to keep mice, roaches and ants away, since they do not like such strong scents. You will also need to replace these leaves after so long, once they begin to loose their pungency. If you would rather work with essential oils, consider buying a spray bottle. Depending upon its size you will add more water than essential oil of mints or bay and then spray to accommodate your needs. There are other types of herbs that can be useful for keeping the critters at bay. Peppermint and other mints. Cinnamon and so on... However, it is in your best interest that you do a bit of research on any herb that you may choose to use before using any herb. Chemical products may be useful if you care to use those types of items, however as long as you or anyone who lives with you are not allergic to the herbs, they are more healthy for you as well as the earth we live on. Please feel free to add your own of course, since we all need to know these things.

* Note: The water from boiled rice can also be used for feeding babies. This is often used when infants have an allergy to milk products. Just in case anyone does find themselves in a position of not having formula for an infant in times of need.