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About funkenheimer

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  1. funkenheimer

    Child support question

    I am divorced and remarried. I have full custody of my daughters. My ex has been paying $30/month for child support for nearly 6 years. She is now working full time and has even had 2 jobs at one point. I have tried to get the amount increased using the Utah Office of Recovery Services but they have not been successful in getting this adjusted. I am now working on a motion to change the child support through the court system. However, my ex-wife won't tell me who she works for. She has told me how much she makes but refuses to show proof. My question: In the form for the motion to modify child support it asks for the amount requested. How can I accurately determine this if she refuses to provide any type of proof of income? Someone mentioned filing an order to show cause but I have no idea how to do this. I don't have the money to hire an attorney. Are then any attorneys out there willing to point me in the right direction? Is there anyone who has gone through this before, who could provide some insight? Thanks in advance!
  2. funkenheimer

    Incorrect promptings?

    I believe the prompting could have come from the spirit. Especially considering you felt the prompting at times you were most in tune with the spirit (watching general conference or reading the scriptures). However, our Father in Heaven has given each of his children a wonderful gift of agency. Hypothetically, lets say this was in fact a prompting of the spirit. You acted correctly by following this prompting. This doesn't mean the young man in question has to respond appropriately. He has the freedom to choose. In fact it is entirely possible that he felt a similar prompting that created the animosity he has toward you. It may not be anything you have done wrong, but rather his own guilt of acting contrary to what the spirit indicated.
  3. funkenheimer

    Modifying a divorce decree

    I have not posted on this board in a while but I have received some very good advice in the past and thought I would try it again with this new problem. I have been divorced for 4 years and remarried for 2 years. My divorce decree states that I can randomly drug test my ex wife once each month. In the 4 years we have been divorced she has failed dozens of drug tests and passed 1. The only penalty for a failed drug test is that she loses visitation until she tests clean. I now realize this is not enough. Unfortunately my divorce papers only allow me to have her drug tested for 4 years. This has recently expired. I want to do the following that would require modifying the divorce decree. I have documentation for all of the failed drug attempts. - restablish drug testing as she clearly is not clean. - establish a much more strict drug testing policy that includes outpatient therapy and some kind of 12 step program Is it possible to get a divorce decree modified by myself? I have done some research and it seems pretty difficult. I have also met with a few attorneys and it will cost me around $3000 - $4000 dollars. I have been out of work for 4 months, recently had heart surgery, and I just don't have the money.
  4. funkenheimer

    legal advice

    Thanks Just_A_Guy. I will give them a call. If there were a way to remove her from my kids' life without hurting them I would. She is a bad influence in so many ways. However, they love her very much so make every effort possible to facilitate visitation. Having said that, every decision I make regarding her visitation is based on the safety of my daughters. I want her to be a part of their life for their sake. But I need them to be safe while they are with her.
  5. funkenheimer

    legal advice

    I have been divorced from my ex-wife for just over 3 years. As part of the divorce decree I was given the right to require random drug tests. Over the course of the past 3 years or so my ex-wife has passed 2 drug tests on the first attempt. Currently the only penalty outlined in my divorce papers is that she loses visitation until she successfully passes a drug test and then her visitation is restored. I am now in the process of working to amend my divorce papers to be more specific as to what is and is not allowed and also implement increasingly more restrictive penalties for failed drug tests. I know how to file the paper work and am consulting with an attorney. What I need is a good drug testing policy and outline for penalties in the form of loss of visitation. Anyone have any ideas?
  6. funkenheimer

    In a street fight...

    Light saber wins every time. Dr Who is for girls and old men.
  7. funkenheimer

    How do I get off of caffeine?

    Giving up caffeine is similar to overcoming any addiction. You need to approach it in a similar manner. I have been a heavy caffeine drinker for many years and just recently gave it up. Granted, giving up caffeine is probably easier than harder drugs or alcohol. But caffeine is still physically addictive. Excedrin helped with the headaches. It has a small amount of caffeine that seemed to take the edge off the headaches. On the third day when the headaches were unbearable my wife purchased a 12 oz. can of caffeinated soda. That helped. I would not recommend keeping "emergency stashes" on hand as it is too easy to revert to old habits. I did it cold turkey after one night getting ready for bed I was having some trouble breathing. My wife drove me to the hospital and my blood pressure was extremely high (195/145) and I ended up in Intensive Care. The doctor told me I needed to change my eating habits (low fat, low sodium, and low sugar), exercise more, and quit drinking soft drinks or I wasn't going to live to see 50. I am 37 years old and have a 7 week old daughter at home. Just the motivation I needed.
  8. funkenheimer

    Is there an LDS gun advice site?

    I have several hand guns but my personal choice for home defense is a .12 gauge 870 Wing Master. I figure most people know the sound of a shotgun pumping and aren't going to wait around to see it.
  9. funkenheimer

    Are most people fair-weather friends?

    A friend will help you move. A good friend will help you move a body. My closest friends are family but I do have a few other close friends. Oddly enough my 2 closest friends or buddies are non-members, not that that makes any difference. They are the kind of friends that would drop anything to help out. They helped me through my divorce. They took me fishing when I knew neither one of them really liked to fish (I don't even think they bought licenses). I think that most people in general are selfish. I think that's human nature. But every now and then you come across some people who are truly remarkable human beings. Perhaps I have just been blessed.
  10. funkenheimer

    Want what you can't have?

    I met my wife online. We dated for almost a year and then got married. She lived out of state and we chatted (IM, text, and phone) for about a month before I decided to go meet her. She lived about 4 hours away. A colleague of mine suggested to pretend to be not interested because "girls want what they can't have." I did the opposite. I held her hand when we went to dinner and even kissed her on our first date. Later after we were engaged I told her what my colleague had said and asked her what she would have thought had I done that. She said "I would have thought you weren't interested in me and that would have been the end." I do need to point out that my wife and I are both in our mid 30s and this is a second marriage for both of us. Neither of us were interested in playing games and knew what we wanted. If you are considering this approach to meet women maybe it's you who isn't ready for a long term relationship or marriage.
  11. funkenheimer

    Is there an LDS gun advice site?

    One more thing, Most modern revolvers are double action which means as you pull the trigger it pulls the hammer back and releases at the end of the trigger pull. You don't have to pull the hammer back for each round. Just squeeze the trigger like you would your trusty old .45. If you are that comfortable with your .45 I would go with that. The last hing you want to do is make a mistake when it really matters.
  12. funkenheimer

    Is there an LDS gun advice site?

    I am a gun enthusiast but by no means consider myself an expert. My wife and I have concealed firearms permits. Right now my wife carries a .22 magnum but I hope to upgrade her to a .38 revolver soon. The benefit of a revolver is they are pretty much point and shoot. They have fewer jams and other problems that are common with semi-automatic weapons. The disadvantage is they don't carry as many rounds as an automatic. That said my personal choice is a Glock 27 which holds 9 rounds of .40 caliber ammunition and ways just under 20 oz. It comes down to reliability vs. ammunition. However, if you need more than 6 rounds of ammunition you are in some pretty serious trouble and is another 3 going to make the difference? And what good is the gun if it stovepipes the first round (spent cartridge stuck during ejection creating what looks like a stovepipe coming out of the gun). Tough call and often debated. However, if you are going to carry a revolver I would consider a .357. If you can handle a .45 you should have no problem with the .357 and they offer more firepower than the .38.
  13. funkenheimer

    Damaged goods?

    Mistie - you will be judged by others. It's human nature. It also seems more prevalent in the church, but that's just my opinion. All you can do is ignore and keep your head up. No one can tell you when you should start dating. That is a deeply personal question and that is between you and the Lord. You need to do what is the best interest of your kids. My advice to you is go to the Lord and seek his counsel. You will know when the time is right. For me it was about 2 years after my divorce before I started dating. Even the thought of dating made me sick at first. It seemed vulgar to even talk about. Eventually those feelings changed. I still remember my first date after the divorce. It was my first "first date" in nearly 14 years. I was a mess. In the end though the Lord knew what was in store. A scripture that helped me tremendously after the divorce and one that I still live my life by today is from Proverbs chapter 3 verses 5-6 5. Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 6. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. A few months after some casual dating I met a very special lady who changed my life. Just shy of a year later I married her. Trust in the Lord. He knows what is best and he knows the path you need to follow. If you do this you will find peace and true happiness, regardless of where that path takes you.
  14. funkenheimer

    Damaged goods?

    Let me speak from the other side... Almost a year ago I met a wonderful lady online. She had 3 kids and was divorced. We chatted and talked on the phone for almost a month when we decided to meet. Before I drove the distance (she lived quite a way away) she confessed some things to me from her past. When we met she was again active in the church. To make a long story short, I didn't really know the person she told me about. I fell in love with who she was now and last Saturday we were married in the temple.