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Everything posted by Suzie

  1. I am more concerned about the way he chooses to respond to all of this. You mentioned "my husband has often said that if the shoe was on the other foot, and I had texted a guy I had had an emotional affair years ago with, he would just laugh it off." If that's true, I find it heartbreaking and the only reason he is saying this, it is because he has been unfaithful. He is basically saying you are making a big deal about it when it is not. And if this is the way he sees it, it means he has not taken responsibility for what he did and does not feel remorse in the least. Again, this is not about the emotional affair but the way he is choosing to respond: By lying, disrespecting you and making you feel like all of this is not a big deal. And when a person doesn't feel remorse at all, guess what happens? He/she might do it again. The question is: What will you do about it?
  2. Suzie

    What’s the last movie you watched?

    Harriet. Excellent film and story.
  3. Not necessarily. FWIW, in my very limited opinion (based on what you wrote) there are two main possibilities. One, as it was mentioned here before... mental health related issues (if this is the case, he needs to get professional help ASAP). I tend to lean towards the other possibility that something indeed happened after his second year, something serious and it is causing him to behave this way. As someone mentioned before, it will take a while for him to feel that he can trust with whatever is bothering him and this is the reason why it is crucial at this time for him to KNOW that he is loved and that nothing will change that. I wish you and your entire family all the best.
  4. Suzie

    Secret Santa

    I am currently binge-watching these Secret Santa videos. There are many people out there struggling and yet keeping strong. This story (and her message at the end) touched my heart.
  5. Suzie

    Guaranteed Income Supplement

    @anatess2, I am confused. Not sure what you're talking about (you tagged me).
  6. I saw this at a client's house today. Definition of faith or definition of knowledge?
  7. Suzie

    Prince Andrew

    I don't get the fascination with the Royal family and whether or not baby Archie has red hair.
  8. @dddd I read your OP and it seems like everything was okay with you until you realized that she is at least 42 and it seems like you have a problem with this lady dating younger men. You ask if it is even any of your business and the answer is no, it is not. You are just disagreeing with her choices. If you don't want to give her rides, just politely decline. That's all.
  9. Suzie

    Necessary Thanksgiving Foods

    Even though we went Vegan some years ago, I was able to "veganize" your macaroni and cheese recipe (still one of my family's favorite dishes )We will be having Gardein crispy tenders, mashed potatoes and gravy, macaroni and cheese, green been casserole, corn, dinner rolls and Daiya New York cheezecake for dessert.
  10. Suzie

    Faith vs. Knowledge

    Well, knowledge can be dogmatic or critical in nature. Dogmatic knowledge for me is the acceptance of a particular set of beliefs without going through the process of rational/logical analysis or deconstruction but with a very important distinction: The person receiving it relies on the truthfulness of the storyteller. We have been believing in stories through dogmatic knowledge for centuries. In my view, Faith is based on dogmatic knowledge.
  11. Suzie

    Faith vs. Knowledge

    @Just_A_Guy @MarginOfError Some people think about Faith as blind and illogical without realizing that needs to be based in some sort of dogmatic knowledge, in other words Rational Faith. Over the years, I have seen how Faith and doubt are treated as direct enemies and it annoys me a little bit. Perhaps because in my personal experience my doubts have been a driving force to action, I cannot imagine my life without them and I’m very cognizant at the fact that they shouldn't diminish my Faith but fuel it. Doubt is without a doubt (sorry, I had to say it) a prerequisite to Faith and we should stop demonizing it. Having said that, I admit my doubts are not necessarily dogmatic in nature.
  12. Suzie

    Faith vs. Knowledge

    Well, what is your definition of knowledge within this context?
  13. Doubt it but if there are...maybe their wards are doing really well to actually have the time to be checking if women are wearing pants to Church. It is so silly, it is not even funny.
  14. It is perplexing to think that if you are a Bishop you will be going around checking if women are wearing pants and ask them if they are rebelling. What? It is absolutely absurd. And... your ward must be doing really well if as a Bishop you have that kind of time.
  15. Hi, I have a couple of questions/thoughts about all of this. First, I would like to know how did you feel when the Bishop asked you to call this sister to be your adviser? (knowing that she was upset about being released). You also mentioned that your 2nd counselor expressed concern about this adviser not attending meetings, planning lessons or assisting in planning activities and you prayed about it and expressed in the chat group the need to support one another and that a big part of that is attending activities and Sunday meetings as often as possible. How often are these meetings? Sundays too? Personally, I'm not a fan of addressing these issues by text... I think they can come across as passive-aggressive. However, it is not uncommon for people to speak "in general" when in fact they want to talk to ONE person but they are trying to avoid confrontation. This method is ineffective in my view. Having said that, I'm a little surprised that you didn't mention your course of action (after praying). Based on what you wrote, it seems like you prayed and then posted in the group chat. But, what about the most important issue...What about finding out WHY this sister has not been attending meetings/planning activities? Maybe a home visit? A face to face chat? Maybe she is indeed (as the Bishop stated) upset that she was being released and this should have been a great opportunity to show her that you are not here to boss her around or to make her feel less but to love her, support her and serve along with her. In my experience as a Church leader, sisters need to feel reassured because they go through so much... and this is why we need to focus more on the WHY rather than just expect them to fulfill certain expectations just because "that's their calling". I kindly suggest that you focus on the WHY and try to reach out to her, you will not only gain a sister who will support you but also a friend.
  16. When I was a young woman (between 12 and 14), I received a phone call asking me if I could offer the opening prayer in a stake activity (I don't recall if it was a YW activity, seminary or something else). However, I was beyond excited... it was such a big deal to me. I was young, insecure and I remember my innocent self even "planning" for days what I would say in my prayer, I didn't want to mess up. I decided to wear dress pants for this activity (no jeans), I loved those pants because they made me look all grown up so when the day arrived, I remember reaching early because I couldn't contain the excitement. I was asked to sit down near the front, I took a program and my sister and I sat together... you could have seen my smile from miles away! Life at home was difficult and Church was for me an oasis where I found solace and acceptance so the fact that the "Church" chose ME (insignificant me in my view at that time) to offer a prayer during a stake activity meant the world to me... I remember opening the program and seeing my name printed on it and I couldn't believe it. When the meeting started, I heard my name being called to offer the prayer. I remember that it took me forever to reach the podium because I was so nervous... and when I reached and I'm about to offer the prayer, the Stake YW president stopped me and said: "Suzie, you cannot offer the prayer. You are wearing pants." and then signed for me to leave the podium and choose someone else to offer the prayer. I remember going back to my seat completely embarrassed by the "looks" I was getting from everyone there and deeply sad knowing that God doesn't accept prayers from people like me. I wondered what I did so wrong... because I always did something wrong. I remember the prayer being said but... my eyes were not closed. I was quietly crying and my eyes were looking at my name in that program and wondering about pants... I type this and I have to be honest... I have to stop because I'm overcome with the same emotion I felt many years ago. It wasn't just a simple prayer for me... this experience CHANGED everything. Over the years, it became a VERY powerful lesson in my life about acceptance, about looking beyond the exterior...being less preoccupied about shirt colors, beards or tattoos and more concerned about cultivating a kind heart that can make people feel truly loved and accepted in Christ's Church... I am just HAPPY to see people coming to Church with whatever they have.... partaking of the sacrament and doing the best they can. I don't want anyone coming to Church and feel like I did that day... I want everyone to feel accepted, knowing that no matter what they are wearing God listens to their prayers. "for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart." Even when they are wearing pants...
  17. @MarginOfError this comment of yours: "I'd love for you to point out any one instance where I've advocated for someone else to wear pants to church, or to wear a colored shirt, or to not shave. I've advocated for people to wear whatever they're comfortable wearing, and against using a dress code as a litmus test for faithfulness. " Reminded me of this quote by Nibley: "The worst sinners, according to Jesus, are not the harlots and publicans, but the religious leaders with their insistence on proper dress and grooming, their careful observance of all the rules, their precious concern for status symbols, their strict legality, their pious patriotism... the haircut becomes the test of virtue in a world where Satan deceives and rules by appearances."
  18. I work with young people on a regular basis and it is amazing to me how many girls see themselves as worthless due to weight related issues. Some of them aren't even overweight but apparently they are according to Instagram.
  19. We help others back to Christ with LOVE. We help them through our own example, through our actions. Otherwise instead of worrying about being led astray by wolves in sheep's clothing, we will have to worry about ourselves becoming pharisees in disciple's clothing... with or without us knowing. A kind suggestion: You might want to rethink your approach in your quest to help others because as I mentioned and you admitted, it is coming across as presumptuous and statements like that can be damaging.
  20. So you know you are not Christ, you know it is awfully presumptuous, you know it is damaging but at the end of the day is all about Grunt...and wanting to be right? That's actually quite sad.
  21. " Your mind, and heart, OBVIOUSLY isn't given to Him as much as it could be. " Your name is Grunt or Christ? That's awfully presumptuous. Seriously dude, statements like that are damaging (perhaps not to @MarginOfError but yes to others). You need to get off your little pony.
  22. Suzie

    History Buff's

    Sorry for replying so late. In 1851 during General Conference, Young stated that the Saints had more than enough time to learn about the WOW therefore, he declared it a divine commandment. Theoretically, it sounds great...but we all know that it wasn't embraced as a commandment right away. Even just before he died in 1877, he continued talking against the use of alcohol, tobacco, tea and coffee and warning the Saints. Leaders after Young seemed to have been extra careful with the use of the word "commandment". IIRC, after Young (and after much discussion and personal interpretations) it was Joseph F. Smith who made the pronouncement about the Word of Wisdom being a commandment and providing the date of the General Conference of 1851 to support his statement.
  23. @Just_A_Guy I am one of those who are dancing along with @MarginOfError for the change because I didn't agree with the policy. However, as a former journalist, the Church needs to fire quite a few people. Seriously.