Zechariah

I'm assuming your apartment was rented to you and your husband only. What, if anything, does your rental agreement stipulate about others moving in with you, or visiting beyond a certain length of time? Maybe you have something in your rental agreement that can help you in getting him out with less chance of conflict. In any case, the landlord or manager should assist you when he is told he has to move, with the presence of the police if there is any concern about what he might do.

Yes, we LDS do tend to lay forth our beliefs from our position, quoting from our leaders, and from scripture, in the process, to explain what the LDS Church teaches and what we believe. I would suggest to you that this is as it should be. The first listing for contend at wordnetweb.princeton.edu is to postulate - to maintain or assert. I would say this is what LDS most commonly do. I would also say we tend to prefer this, as our means of contending for the faith, rather than contending against other faiths.

The heart of a Patriot.

Flyovers, yes, especially in missing man formation. 21 gun salute. Taps. Also, singing, "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing," and being unsuccessful at remaining composed, each and every time. And then there are the unexpected things, with sometimes the most small or random thing catching me completely off guard, touching my soul with deep and profound tenderness, gratitude, or sadness and sorrow. Or, I should probably say, that the Spirit will unexpectedly stir my soul deeply through them.

My wife found this if it helps: Meridian Magazine:: Church History: Handling Life With Humor "Just as Louise reprimanded her children gently, when the Relief Society sisters needed a little nudging, she did so with good humor and gentleness. Although General Authorities suggested that women remove their fashionably large hats during meetings, many women kept them on rather than disturb their hair or appearance. At the beginning of one Relief Society conference, Louise announced to the congregation, “Sisters, we are going to remain seated while we sing our first song. I’m sure you have books and papers and your hats on your laps, and I’m afraid it would be hard for you to hold all of them if you stand.” There were smiles and surprises in the congregations as the embarrassed ladies quickly removed their hats."

My elderly mother (in her 80's) always looks quite formal at church, always wearing a hat, and gloves as well, and appears as the most charming of ladies from an era past, and is always being told how lovely she looks. Her reason for wearing the hat and gloves, though, is because she has a health condition that the fluorescent lighting aggravates. She purposely sits in the back row so her hat does not obstruct anyone's view. As for me, I've almost always worn the standard Sunday attire that most men do (business suit, tie, white shirt, dress shoes). Presently, though, since recently outgrowing my suits, I wear my standard casual/dress attire - good jeans, shirt, sport coat, and cowboy boots, because that's the best I now have that fits. And I must say, I don't miss the tie at all. One day though, when there are again suits hanging in my closet that fit, I'll resume wearing them, even with the tie.

Yes, most frustrating. I hate the way they deliberately phrase things too, in their attempts to remove us from the Christian faith, and especially the way they use lower case letters to represent and disrespect deity, when it has to do with LDS belief: the mormon jesus the mormon gospel the mormon god the mormon heavenly father etc.

Downright balmy compared to 1 degree and/or snow! For today weather.com says it's presently 42 degrees. Says mostly cloudy with temperatures steady near the low 50s. Winds light and variable. High of 53 forecast, low of 39 tonight. (Pacific Northwest)

Taxes Liberals (Yeah, well, we just sent off election ballots. What to you expect?) Okay, let's see - Non-words, such as "expecially" and "irregardless" Hearing temple garments referred to as "garmies" Commonly used by LDS in talks and lessons, "I challenge you." Evangelical expression of having a "burden" for something. A saying my mother used with us kids when she wanted something done. "Your arms aren't painted on!" Actually she still uses it with us (and we're all the age of grandparents now) and it's still annoying.

No. Not unless it was a command. Even then, I might prefer to wait for an angel of God to appear with a drawn sword. Then again... is the fair lady rich? (My wife says she could use another wife around the house to get things done.) In all seriousness, neither of us have a problem with the principle of plurality of wives, in theory. The challenge would be in living it, without a great degree of selfless love.

RipplecutBuddha - for exposing his abs and going barefoot in a, "no shirt, no shoes, no service," establishment.

First, I am always impressed when someone in their youth is spiritually attuned enough, that he seeks the things of God, and pursues them for himself, in spite of opposition or disapproval from family or friends. That shows great spiritual maturity. Most young people, and even many in the Church, have more worldly interests at 15, so I commend you. Some of the strongest men of scripture were very much on their own in some similar ways, but the Lord strengthened them in their difficulties, and they grew to become great instruments in His hands. As you study the scriptures, you will gain strength from their experiences. Trust in the Lord. Learn patience and humility in your youth. You can be a great example and help to your family and friends. Since the Church is very family oriented, it can be hard when you aren't part of a traditional LDS family unit, especially when taking part in family related activities at Church. Invite your family, even if you're sure they won't ever come or participate, as family members tend not to like feeling that they're being left out, and they don't want to feel as if they're loosing you to your new found religious faith. Be sensitive to their needs and concerns. At the same time, though, as long as they allow your activity at Church, don't let being the lone LDS member in your family, keep you from enjoying family Church activities. There are other families there that will be happy to include you with their own. God Bless. :)

Oh, nice. That's some company "loyal" to its employees, eh?

Thank you! That's what my wandering brain was looking for!

Oh my. Well if this is so now, then the laws were changed, as it was in Utah where I filed my complaint of wrongful termination. But, like I said, that was over 25 years ago.

I would recommend that you consider filing a complaint as well, or at least seriously checking into it, and not taking too much time about making that decision either, as the time table is short for this. I had to do this once several years ago. I guess that was over 25 years ago now. Wow, time sure passes quickly. Of course, who knows how the laws have changed since then, or how they would differ from state to state, but I would advise looking into it. Darn - what's the name of the government office you file your complaint with? I can't even remember that, but you can check with your state employment department, they can tell you and give you the number. Anyway - back then, and in the state in which I lived at the time, if you suffered wrongful termination, you had also been wrongfully denied future earnings as a result, which, if the court ruled in your favor, they could order your employer to compensate, which he would then have to pay from the time of your wrongful termination, until the time of the court ruling and/or up to a two year limit, and the compensation was something like a 2/3 or 3/4 percentage of your former salary. You can always drop a complaint after filing it (such as if you decided not to bother because you got your dream job a couple weeks from now) but with the job market the way it is, it would be a good idea to at least seriously consider covering yourself, just in case things don't go so nicely.

Thank you very much. I look forward to reading them. :)

Thank you so much for sharing what you have. I don't know much about autism as it is, and, until reading your post, I didn't realize it, but I have heard almost nothing about autism in adults. In describing the things you have, though, you've given me reason to want to know more, and I'm going to do some studying. I'm glad your ward members are so caring and Christlike. Even so, I imagine it's often very difficult, just the same, to have so few people able to understand. But I do know I can say, without reservation, that there is most definitely a place for you in God's kingdom, here on this earth and in the worlds to come.

Good man.

That you are seeking help to work through this with your husband, indicates to me a very great love for him, and considerable compassion and grace. I can easily see why a woman would want to throw in the towel. Few things tread more cruelly upon the very core of the heart of a woman. Such betrayals tear away at her sense of worth, can crush her love of husband, and can completely destroy her trust, and, as a result, her marriage and any future happiness with a man. I truly admire your desire to work through this with him. Your husband may have been a selfish fool to behave as he did, but he is a lucky man to have you. God bless you in your efforts.

Here's a link where this topic was started before. I'm looking forward to learning more too. :) http://www.lds.net/forums/lds-gospel-discussion/27772-thekabalist-marriage-judaism.html

Most often forgiveness is far from quick, or easy, especially when it comes to abuse, whether physical or emotional. Forgiveness is also, often, less of a deliberate and conscious choice than it is something that we reach at the end of a process. Of course, there are sometimes those exceptional individuals who are able to forgive even the most wretched things easily, but, for most of us, it takes time, patience, and much help from the Lord. Some friends of ours once had a little grandson who was molested by a family acquaintance. Their grief, and the anger they felt toward this man, was beyond what they could reconcile, with their feelings toward him being so intense at times that they feared they might never be able to forgive him, and they knew forgiveness was required of God. They wanted to be obedient, but because of the extent of their feelings, at times being filled with such bitterness and hatred toward him, neither of them felt they should continue to attend the temple, feeling they were unworthy to enter the house of the Lord. They went to confide these things to their Church leaders, but, fortunately, their leaders were able to recognize something they were too consumed with grief and anger to realize. They were told that they were, indeed, worthy to attend the temple, and were counseled to do so often, being told that it was through temple worship, that they would one day be able to forgive the man for what he had done, which, in time, they were able to do. A close family member, who was once the victim of an attempted rape by her brother-in-law, spent many years in much turmoil because of what he'd tried to do to her. What made this even worse for her, was that he had not only hurt her, but had betrayed his own brother, her husband, in the process. On top of this, her brother-in-law treated her disrespectfully for many years, because she'd told her husband what he'd done (though he lied, denying it, when her husband confronted him). All in all, she knew she was to forgive him, for all he'd done and caused, and she desired to be obedient in this, and sought the help of the Lord in this, for years, but even with the passage of many years (more than 25) when she was forced to think on it, she continued to feel it hanging over her, even though her brother-in-law had finally mellowed enough to stop speaking rudely to her. But, when her brother-in-law unexpectedly died, she discovered she felt no animus in her heart toward him at all, and that's when she realized she had forgiven him, though she was unaware of it until his passing. It was also she, who made sure the temple work was done for her brother-in-law. Some things take time. Some even a lifetime, and beyond. So, my advise is to just love your wife. Comfort her when she needs comfort. Be longsuffering. Eternally patient, if you will. I would suggest only the gentlest approach, as it is still she who must work through this. Don't dwell on what about this whole thing is making you unhappy and unfulfilled in marriage. Don't push. Don't prod. Don't expect, or insist, that she do something she may very well not yet be mentally, emotionally, or spiritually able to take on to your satisfaction at this point. Just be her rock, and her refuge. Just love her.

UGH! That had to have been absolutely maddening! Now, if they'd been smarter, and wiser, they would have recognized that woman's value, both present and future, hired her, and then let her train her replacement whenever that time came. I had my own experiences with the interview process at a university a couple years ago though. Both times I thought things went exceptionally well, with those interviewing me appearing to be highly impressed, and more so with each of my answers to the questions they posed. But, while waiting to hear back on the first job, I happened to meet an alumnus who had studied and worked in that department himself (agricultural department). He told me he wished me luck, but not to expect to be hired, as he knew well how political the system there was. He said that, while, by law they must publicly advertise their positions and interview all qualified applicants, they already know who they want before they even begin the process. I was disappointed to hear that, and more disappointed when I didn't get that first job. Then afterward I happened to meet a second alumnus of that same department, and in the course of conversation we discussed what I had been told by the first, and he was in absolute agreement. I kept that in mind when I applied for the second position a few months later, in spite of being even more qualified for it than I'd been for the first. I also went to check out the facilities, and met the man I would be replacing, if I was hired. We hit it off so well we spent hours together conversing about the industry, the job, and with he showing me around and asking me questions. He was so impressed at the extent of my knowledge that he said he was going to recommend me as his replacement. But, alas, I didn't get that job either. Of course they don't tell you why they didn't hire you in their letters informing you they filled the positions, only thank you for your interest. So I could only guess at the possible reasons, though nothing I was able to come up with had anything to do with my qualifications, experience, or abilities. So who knows?

Well, I hope this doesn't make you feel worse, but some months ago I decided to check into the laws against discrimination in hiring. Though it seemed to me, for some time, that I was being passed over for jobs because of age, it wasn't until a prospective employer turned me away flat, telling me outright he wanted someone younger, that I knew, without question, that this was a problem, so decided to check into it. Unfortunately, what I discovered was that such laws don't apply to businesses with under a certain number of employees (though I don't know if, or how, those laws may differ from state to state). I had to conclude that the reasoning behind size of employee base being a factor is that the slack (supposed) left by older or injured or disabled workers, couldn't be accommodated unless there were a sufficient number of other employees to make up the anticipated difference in job production. While I could, at least, understand the practicality of that, it didn't make it any easier, only more frustrating, knowing, due to the kinds of work I'd done in my life, that virtually any job I would apply for would be with small enough businesses, with few enough employees, that they could legally refuse to hire me, simply because they didn't like my age.

Well, not that young, now that I think on it, maybe 30's and 40's mostly, I'd guess. But maybe you're right, just the same. Maybe they still feel too young to appreciate being called ma'am, especially by some "old" guy.