Zechariah
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Posts posted by Zechariah
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But it seems much more common to find LDS simply stating their own positions (or reciting those of their leaders) with little or no attempt to engage and debate important differences.
Yes, we LDS do tend to lay forth our beliefs from our position, quoting from our leaders, and from scripture, in the process, to explain what the LDS Church teaches and what we believe.
I would suggest to you that this is as it should be.
The first listing for contend at wordnetweb.princeton.edu is to postulate - to maintain or assert.
I would say this is what LDS most commonly do. I would also say we tend to prefer this, as our means of contending for the faith, rather than contending against other faiths.
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Missing man formation is my favorite. How did you know? :) I get choked up everytime I see the Blue Angels perform or even when I just see a small clip of them. They are my heroes.
The heart of a Patriot.
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I get choked up over flyovers. They get me every single time.
Flyovers, yes, especially in missing man formation.
21 gun salute.
Taps.
Also, singing, "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing," and being unsuccessful at remaining composed, each and every time.
And then there are the unexpected things, with sometimes the most small or random thing catching me completely off guard, touching my soul with deep and profound tenderness, gratitude, or sadness and sorrow. Or, I should probably say, that the Spirit will unexpectedly stir my soul deeply through them.
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My wife found this if it helps: Meridian Magazine:: Church History: Handling Life With Humor
"Just as Louise reprimanded her children gently, when the Relief Society sisters needed a little nudging, she did so with good humor and gentleness. Although General Authorities suggested that women remove their fashionably large hats during meetings, many women kept them on rather than disturb their hair or appearance.
At the beginning of one Relief Society conference, Louise announced to the congregation, “Sisters, we are going to remain seated while we sing our first song. I’m sure you have books and papers and your hats on your laps, and I’m afraid it would be hard for you to hold all of them if you stand.” There were smiles and surprises in the congregations as the embarrassed ladies quickly removed their hats."
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I know what you say is proper etiquette. When my son was a teenager, he did not understand why it seemed that girls are sometimes not held to the same dress standards. Men are encouraged to wear slacks, white shirt and ties. Sisters today (all ages) often wear denim dresses, jumpers & skirts. It would seem to be only fair that the Brethren could also wear denim. But, of course, it does not work that way. My son would ask why do the ladies get to wear hats when the men can not. I realize that a man would not be turned away simply for wearing, say, denim jeans and a sweater. I know it is a matter of respect to just dress the best one can.
When I first joined the church in my early twenties, I was a little put off with the official dress standards. Then I realized that I was being encouraged to dress my best, not to judge anyone else for what they were wearing.
My elderly mother (in her 80's) always looks quite formal at church, always wearing a hat, and gloves as well, and appears as the most charming of ladies from an era past, and is always being told how lovely she looks. Her reason for wearing the hat and gloves, though, is because she has a health condition that the fluorescent lighting aggravates. She purposely sits in the back row so her hat does not obstruct anyone's view.
As for me, I've almost always worn the standard Sunday attire that most men do (business suit, tie, white shirt, dress shoes). Presently, though, since recently outgrowing my suits, I wear my standard casual/dress attire - good jeans, shirt, sport coat, and cowboy boots, because that's the best I now have that fits. And I must say, I don't miss the tie at all. One day though, when there are again suits hanging in my closet that fit, I'll resume wearing them, even with the tie.
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What bothers me MOST is when others who are NOT LDS- try to tell LDS what we believe (which it isn't!)
as they read it in some anti book-!
That just is so unfair-- straw man garbage (say/build something that looks somewhat like a man (the truth) but isn't and then "beat him" (show how it is wrong (of course it is!) which is easily done- as he is NOT the truth-.
Do I "win" with the WORST things others say that is **** so **** frustrating? ; / Gramajane
Yes, most frustrating.
I hate the way they deliberately phrase things too, in their attempts to remove us from the Christian faith, and especially the way they use lower case letters to represent and disrespect deity, when it has to do with LDS belief:
the mormon jesus
the mormon gospel
the mormon god
the mormon heavenly father
etc.
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Downright balmy compared to 1 degree and/or snow!
For today weather.com says it's presently 42 degrees. Says mostly cloudy with temperatures steady near the low 50s. Winds light and variable. High of 53 forecast, low of 39 tonight.
(Pacific Northwest)
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Taxes
Liberals
(Yeah, well, we just sent off election ballots. What to you expect?)
Okay, let's see -
Non-words, such as "expecially" and "irregardless"
Hearing temple garments referred to as "garmies"
Commonly used by LDS in talks and lessons, "I challenge you."
Evangelical expression of having a "burden" for something.
A saying my mother used with us kids when she wanted something done. "Your arms aren't painted on!" Actually she still uses it with us (and we're all the age of grandparents now) and it's still annoying.
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No. Not unless it was a command. Even then, I might prefer to wait for an angel of God to appear with a drawn sword.
Then again... is the fair lady rich?
(My wife says she could use another wife around the house to get things done.)
In all seriousness, neither of us have a problem with the principle of plurality of wives, in theory. The challenge would be in living it, without a great degree of selfless love.
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RipplecutBuddha - for exposing his abs and going barefoot in a, "no shirt, no shoes, no service," establishment.
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I'm in a lot of emotional struggle right now. i am 15 and am converting, but mom isnt too happy about me switching religions, but at least she is allowing me to be baptized before im 18 =]. Anyway, i feel so left out because the church focuses on Family so much and i feel very left out. I dont know what to do; my friends make fun of me, my whole family doesnt understand or really approve, and it is hard to feel the spirit and have faith if i am constantly being put down. I really need all of your help, thank you and God Bless.
First, I am always impressed when someone in their youth is spiritually attuned enough, that he seeks the things of God, and pursues them for himself, in spite of opposition or disapproval from family or friends. That shows great spiritual maturity. Most young people, and even many in the Church, have more worldly interests at 15, so I commend you.
Some of the strongest men of scripture were very much on their own in some similar ways, but the Lord strengthened them in their difficulties, and they grew to become great instruments in His hands. As you study the scriptures, you will gain strength from their experiences. Trust in the Lord. Learn patience and humility in your youth. You can be a great example and help to your family and friends.
Since the Church is very family oriented, it can be hard when you aren't part of a traditional LDS family unit, especially when taking part in family related activities at Church. Invite your family, even if you're sure they won't ever come or participate, as family members tend not to like feeling that they're being left out, and they don't want to feel as if they're loosing you to your new found religious faith. Be sensitive to their needs and concerns. At the same time, though, as long as they allow your activity at Church, don't let being the lone LDS member in your family, keep you from enjoying family Church activities. There are other families there that will be happy to include you with their own.
God Bless. :)
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True story and I was appalled. The company that let me go in September for no known reason..recently fired a friend of mine as well. Gave her no reason either. The kicker...they let her know she was fired by a text message. Didn't even have the decency to tell her in person.
Oh, nice. That's some company "loyal" to its employees, eh?
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I know in Utah, you could contact the State Labor Commission.
Thank you! That's what my wandering brain was looking for!
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It does depend on the state as the legalities of firing. Utah is a state where they can fire for no reason whatsoever. I'm not sure I agree with it. It seems to provide very little recourse.
Oh my. Well if this is so now, then the laws were changed, as it was in Utah where I filed my complaint of wrongful termination. But, like I said, that was over 25 years ago.
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I would recommend that you consider filing a complaint as well, or at least seriously checking into it, and not taking too much time about making that decision either, as the time table is short for this. I had to do this once several years ago. I guess that was over 25 years ago now. Wow, time sure passes quickly. Of course, who knows how the laws have changed since then, or how they would differ from state to state, but I would advise looking into it.
Darn - what's the name of the government office you file your complaint with? I can't even remember that, but you can check with your state employment department, they can tell you and give you the number.
Anyway - back then, and in the state in which I lived at the time, if you suffered wrongful termination, you had also been wrongfully denied future earnings as a result, which, if the court ruled in your favor, they could order your employer to compensate, which he would then have to pay from the time of your wrongful termination, until the time of the court ruling and/or up to a two year limit, and the compensation was something like a 2/3 or 3/4 percentage of your former salary.
You can always drop a complaint after filing it (such as if you decided not to bother because you got your dream job a couple weeks from now) but with the job market the way it is, it would be a good idea to at least seriously consider covering yourself, just in case things don't go so nicely.
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Thank you muchly for your kind words. You may find the writings here to be helpful; they're written by autistic people. (Warning for some strong language on that first essay.) There's also Amanda Baggs, a "low-functioning" autistic blogger who has appeared on CNN before, and Michelle Dawson, who's helping with research into the "difference model" and autistic people's unique strengths.
You can read an article on Wired magazine that discusses the both of them, here.
Thank you very much. I look forward to reading them. :)
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Thank you so much for sharing what you have. I don't know much about autism as it is, and, until reading your post, I didn't realize it, but I have heard almost nothing about autism in adults. In describing the things you have, though, you've given me reason to want to know more, and I'm going to do some studying.
I'm glad your ward members are so caring and Christlike. Even so, I imagine it's often very difficult, just the same, to have so few people able to understand. But I do know I can say, without reservation, that there is most definitely a place for you in God's kingdom, here on this earth and in the worlds to come.
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Thank you so much everyone. You have giving me a new outlook on this and now I realize the best thing to do is pray and wait and support her in every way I can. Showing much love and not leaving her side. She has said this is her issue and only she can work it out. It will take time and that she is trying very hard because she knows how much it hurts our relationship, her happiness and more importantly her relationship with Heavenly Father. I also realize that this issue may not be worked out totaly in this life time and true love like I feel Heavenly Father wishes us to have between husband and wife can sometimes mean giving up our selfish ideas or dreams of a perfect relationship here and by doing so He grants us many treasures and we learn lessons that can't be learned if this had not happened. I will continue my prayer for her and for myself and if/when she asks me to help, I will do all in my power. If she never does I will love her and stand by her. I just fear that as it is written, if she does not forgive the man in her past Heavenly Father may not forgive her when it is her time to go before Him. I pray that He has mercy on her soul and helps her to overcome this soon, not for me but for her. Thank you again brothers and sisters.
Good man.
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That you are seeking help to work through this with your husband, indicates to me a very great love for him, and considerable compassion and grace.
I can easily see why a woman would want to throw in the towel. Few things tread more cruelly upon the very core of the heart of a woman. Such betrayals tear away at her sense of worth, can crush her love of husband, and can completely destroy her trust, and, as a result, her marriage and any future happiness with a man.
I truly admire your desire to work through this with him. Your husband may have been a selfish fool to behave as he did, but he is a lucky man to have you.
God bless you in your efforts.
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Here's a link where this topic was started before. I'm looking forward to learning more too. :)
http://www.lds.net/forums/lds-gospel-discussion/27772-thekabalist-marriage-judaism.html
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Please, everyone. There has been something wrong in my marriage since day one and this June will make 9 yrs. I just found out yesterday that the biggest issue is.. my wife has not totally and completely forgiven a man in a past relationship for terrible things done to her, mentally. No sexual abuse or anything. Please give me any and all of the scripture, good reading materiel references, anything that covers the subject of forgiveness and how extremely important it is. She has not been happy for many years therefore I have not been happy. I realize I cannot do this for her but I can help by providing her all of the Biblical info and where she can read and obsorb it herself in the Bible. I am at a crossroads and refuse to pay for the pains another man has caused her much longer. She is my wife and I am not giving up or abandoning her unless I realize she refuses to let this go and truly forgives him so we can have a real relationship but more importantly, she can not in her current state have a real relationship with our Heavenly Father for it is written, "if we do not forgive others, He will not forgive us". That is my biggest fear for her. Please help. Thank you all in advance brothers and sisters. Any testimonies from anyone who has gone through something like this will also help. Anything and/or all things you can think of to help please pass it on to us.
Most often forgiveness is far from quick, or easy, especially when it comes to abuse, whether physical or emotional. Forgiveness is also, often, less of a deliberate and conscious choice than it is something that we reach at the end of a process. Of course, there are sometimes those exceptional individuals who are able to forgive even the most wretched things easily, but, for most of us, it takes time, patience, and much help from the Lord.
Some friends of ours once had a little grandson who was molested by a family acquaintance. Their grief, and the anger they felt toward this man, was beyond what they could reconcile, with their feelings toward him being so intense at times that they feared they might never be able to forgive him, and they knew forgiveness was required of God. They wanted to be obedient, but because of the extent of their feelings, at times being filled with such bitterness and hatred toward him, neither of them felt they should continue to attend the temple, feeling they were unworthy to enter the house of the Lord.
They went to confide these things to their Church leaders, but, fortunately, their leaders were able to recognize something they were too consumed with grief and anger to realize. They were told that they were, indeed, worthy to attend the temple, and were counseled to do so often, being told that it was through temple worship, that they would one day be able to forgive the man for what he had done, which, in time, they were able to do.
A close family member, who was once the victim of an attempted rape by her brother-in-law, spent many years in much turmoil because of what he'd tried to do to her. What made this even worse for her, was that he had not only hurt her, but had betrayed his own brother, her husband, in the process. On top of this, her brother-in-law treated her disrespectfully for many years, because she'd told her husband what he'd done (though he lied, denying it, when her husband confronted him).
All in all, she knew she was to forgive him, for all he'd done and caused, and she desired to be obedient in this, and sought the help of the Lord in this, for years, but even with the passage of many years (more than 25) when she was forced to think on it, she continued to feel it hanging over her, even though her brother-in-law had finally mellowed enough to stop speaking rudely to her. But, when her brother-in-law unexpectedly died, she discovered she felt no animus in her heart toward him at all, and that's when she realized she had forgiven him, though she was unaware of it until his passing. It was also she, who made sure the temple work was done for her brother-in-law.
Some things take time. Some even a lifetime, and beyond. So, my advise is to just love your wife. Comfort her when she needs comfort. Be longsuffering. Eternally patient, if you will. I would suggest only the gentlest approach, as it is still she who must work through this. Don't dwell on what about this whole thing is making you unhappy and unfulfilled in marriage. Don't push. Don't prod. Don't expect, or insist, that she do something she may very well not yet be mentally, emotionally, or spiritually able to take on to your satisfaction at this point. Just be her rock, and her refuge. Just love her.
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I managed an editorial department responsible for developing curriculum for one of the state's technology colleges. I needed to hire another editor, which was a fairly rigorous process for two reasons: 1) I tested the bejeepers out of all of the applicants to make sure they knew the basics of curriculum development, as well as proper punctuation, spelling, grammar, etc. If they failed my tests, it ended there.
I had one applicant who passed with flying colors and who had impaccable experience. This woman put me to shame, and I was a very good curriculum writer.
So, to me, horribly overworked and crumbling becuase I kept having to re-do my editor's work because they didn't do it right the first time, having a person in my office that I didn't have to babysite was to die for.
2) Once I made my decision, my applicant had to intereviewed by the Board of Directors. I thought it went swimmingly, but afterwards, I was told no, I could not hire her.
There was no effort to hide the reason why. This woman was middle-aged.
In response to my protestations (outrage), they came up with every excuse imaginable as to how she couldn't possibly do her job as good as a younger person could. And even if she could, the younger person would learn, and thus stay with the college longer.
It was absurd. I tried to explain to them how it was insane to not hire this woman, but they refused to readdress her application. The twinkie I ended up having to hire made my job worse, not better.
In all of my years as a manager, I always wanted the older applicant, because they not only worked harder, they made sure their work was accurate. And all without me having to shadow them every step of the way.
But, today, with jobs so scare, they can turn anyone away they want, and unfortunately, that is often the older applicant. I can't breathe when I think of how that must feel.
Good luck.
Elphaba
UGH! That had to have been absolutely maddening! Now, if they'd been smarter, and wiser, they would have recognized that woman's value, both present and future, hired her, and then let her train her replacement whenever that time came.
I had my own experiences with the interview process at a university a couple years ago though. Both times I thought things went exceptionally well, with those interviewing me appearing to be highly impressed, and more so with each of my answers to the questions they posed.
But, while waiting to hear back on the first job, I happened to meet an alumnus who had studied and worked in that department himself (agricultural department). He told me he wished me luck, but not to expect to be hired, as he knew well how political the system there was. He said that, while, by law they must publicly advertise their positions and interview all qualified applicants, they already know who they want before they even begin the process.
I was disappointed to hear that, and more disappointed when I didn't get that first job. Then afterward I happened to meet a second alumnus of that same department, and in the course of conversation we discussed what I had been told by the first, and he was in absolute agreement.
I kept that in mind when I applied for the second position a few months later, in spite of being even more qualified for it than I'd been for the first. I also went to check out the facilities, and met the man I would be replacing, if I was hired. We hit it off so well we spent hours together conversing about the industry, the job, and with he showing me around and asking me questions. He was so impressed at the extent of my knowledge that he said he was going to recommend me as his replacement. But, alas, I didn't get that job either.
Of course they don't tell you why they didn't hire you in their letters informing you they filled the positions, only thank you for your interest. So I could only guess at the possible reasons, though nothing I was able to come up with had anything to do with my qualifications, experience, or abilities. So who knows?
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I think that is what I'm encountering.
Well, I hope this doesn't make you feel worse, but some months ago I decided to check into the laws against discrimination in hiring. Though it seemed to me, for some time, that I was being passed over for jobs because of age, it wasn't until a prospective employer turned me away flat, telling me outright he wanted someone younger, that I knew, without question, that this was a problem, so decided to check into it. Unfortunately, what I discovered was that such laws don't apply to businesses with under a certain number of employees (though I don't know if, or how, those laws may differ from state to state).
I had to conclude that the reasoning behind size of employee base being a factor is that the slack (supposed) left by older or injured or disabled workers, couldn't be accommodated unless there were a sufficient number of other employees to make up the anticipated difference in job production. While I could, at least, understand the practicality of that, it didn't make it any easier, only more frustrating, knowing, due to the kinds of work I'd done in my life, that virtually any job I would apply for would be with small enough businesses, with few enough employees, that they could legally refuse to hire me, simply because they didn't like my age.
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When it's part of your normal vocabulary I think it's cute. A young kid who was a friend of my daughter's in high school was raised to call women ma'am, and I got a kick out of it. He wasn't even saying it out of respect--he said it without thinking.
How old are the women who are giving you the down turned eye? If they're young, they might not like it. I wouldn't have when I was very young.
I got over it. :)
Elphaba
Well, not that young, now that I think on it, maybe 30's and 40's mostly, I'd guess. But maybe you're right, just the same. Maybe they still feel too young to appreciate being called ma'am, especially by some "old" guy.
Approaching Someone With Violent Tendancies
in Advice Board
Posted
I'm assuming your apartment was rented to you and your husband only. What, if anything, does your rental agreement stipulate about others moving in with you, or visiting beyond a certain length of time? Maybe you have something in your rental agreement that can help you in getting him out with less chance of conflict. In any case, the landlord or manager should assist you when he is told he has to move, with the presence of the police if there is any concern about what he might do.