carlimac

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  1. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Maureen in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    Oh my goodness! I feel sorrowful about having to eliminate cousins from the sealing ( who happen to be some of my daughter's closest friends) and I'm accused of complaining like  a couple of thugs who tied their brother up and left him for dead?? 
     
    I don't happen to feel comfortable with the acting in the new movies and wondering why three new movies were necessary and I'm accused of attacking leaders?  
     
    I'm told to "move on with life"?  
     
    Bridezilla? Because she would like to have her best friends in the temple with her when she gets married?
     
    I make what sounds like a simple solution to a fairly routine, simple problem and I'm treated like I'm apostatizing? 
     
     
    This makes me laugh. Believe me, this is NOT my whole life. I think y'all are more worried about me fretting about this than I am. Honestly people.  Let's get some perspective here. I feel so much defensiveness about this from so many.  Try to take a look at how this would appear to outsiders. Embarrassing really when it's a common sense issue. Why wouldn't you want your loved ones with you at this important step in your life?And yet because of small rooms they are relegated to the punch bowl at the reception. Just seems weird.
     
     This is NOTHING like asking for gay marriage or women holding the priesthood. I'm not petitioning the authorities for anything. I'm not standing up in conference to oppose the leaders.  I'm simply asking why the sealing rooms are so small when Mormon families are often huge.
  2. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Bini in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    So you think that because she has PMS and feels like crap she is "deliberately withholding something that (s)he knows the other partner considers important to a continued fulfilling, healthy relationship."  Honestly?    
     
    She is not being punitive. I assure you.  Let's see...you are coming down with the flu, achy , chills. And you're constipated up to your eyeballs, stomach hurts, bloating, gas, the works.  And your wife comes to you feeling all hot to trot wanting to hop in the sack with you. Then gets petulant when you say, Honey i really don't feel well. Maybe in a few days.  Then claims you have issues but the fact that she had some affairs awhile ago makes your issues equal.     Think about it.  Bridling passion really does allow for more true love. 
  3. Like
    carlimac reacted to notquiteperfect in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    I'm not a fan of thread highjacks so I won't respond to everyone individually but to those that took what I said out of context (whether intimacy or housework responsibilities) I really don't appreciate it.  I'll just figure I hit a nerve (or two) but please be more aware in the future.
  4. Like
    carlimac reacted to nrakimom in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    Thank you for responding! My husband DOES have a sex addiction that we've been working through for a number of years. As long as he keeps trying, it's worth it for me to keep trying. 
  5. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from char713 in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    I swear, even the discussion of men not getting what they want when they want it turns mens' defenses on high alert and  brains off. Go back and READ the original post. Use reason when you actually answer her question. 
     
    How did this turn into a scenario where she is intentionally with holding sex just to spite him? 
  6. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Litzy in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    Oh my goodness! I feel sorrowful about having to eliminate cousins from the sealing ( who happen to be some of my daughter's closest friends) and I'm accused of complaining like  a couple of thugs who tied their brother up and left him for dead?? 
     
    I don't happen to feel comfortable with the acting in the new movies and wondering why three new movies were necessary and I'm accused of attacking leaders?  
     
    I'm told to "move on with life"?  
     
    Bridezilla? Because she would like to have her best friends in the temple with her when she gets married?
     
    I make what sounds like a simple solution to a fairly routine, simple problem and I'm treated like I'm apostatizing? 
     
     
    This makes me laugh. Believe me, this is NOT my whole life. I think y'all are more worried about me fretting about this than I am. Honestly people.  Let's get some perspective here. I feel so much defensiveness about this from so many.  Try to take a look at how this would appear to outsiders. Embarrassing really when it's a common sense issue. Why wouldn't you want your loved ones with you at this important step in your life?And yet because of small rooms they are relegated to the punch bowl at the reception. Just seems weird.
     
     This is NOTHING like asking for gay marriage or women holding the priesthood. I'm not petitioning the authorities for anything. I'm not standing up in conference to oppose the leaders.  I'm simply asking why the sealing rooms are so small when Mormon families are often huge.
  7. Like
    carlimac reacted to Traveler in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    Families are forever - and it you stop to think about it sealing a couple is not just about them.  It is about their family and the truth is that their family goes back and forth in time and touches billions of individuals.  We work very hard to bring families together - not to find excuses to leave someone out.   Temples are about families and we work endlessly not to leave anyone out --- EVER.
     
    There is no doctrine as to the max to invite to the temple.  Sorry to those that think otherwise.  The max is determined by local codes based on exits and room size.  Changing the room size is only part of the problem - fire codes for example have other requirements.  It is not just a choice by the general authorities.
     
    As of today there are limits imposed.  The Church has to comply with local codes and I am sure has not plotted against Uncle Phil or Aunt Jane in large families.  The best we can do is deal with the parameters we are given.  Good individuals in good families will do the best they can and move on with life - there are worse things in life than not being able to attend a favorite relatives special moment.  We can be sad but we can and should be concerned but deal with it and continue our lives the best we can.
  8. Like
    carlimac reacted to Litzy in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    I think we need to tread carefully when it comes to families. Sure, we have the couple that has a few family members and/or friends at a tiny courthouse ceremony, but remember that at least in western culture family is a big, big part of the wedding day.
     
    Should the day be about the bride and groom? Of course. But, for better or for worse, family usually comes with the territory and it does behoove the bride and groom to be diplomatic with the family.
     
     
    LDS sealings are merely one type of wedding in a country full of family-focused celebrations. It can be difficult to separate the two desires.
     
    Other than that, I do agree with much of these posts as far as the temple sealing goes.
  9. Like
    carlimac reacted to prisonchaplain in Navy chaplain faces discharge for intolerance   
    Carlimac, you may be right--that it is coming to that.  What a shame!  I wonder how many veterans visit these pages have stories of chaplains who helped them through their time of service?  I know that when I served as a missionary in Korea, one of the chaplains at the base in Taegu was LDS.  They said he was good about delivering homilies that would encourage LDS and non-LDS alike.  It's just sad that the vast majority who gain comfort and strength and morale will lose out, because a few do not want to hear counsel they disagree with.  It should not have to be this way.
  10. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Jane_Doe in Are LDS as 'judgmental' as Evangelicals are? Maybe you should be!   
    Yes it does cut both ways.  When we lived in MN our "Evangelical Christian" next door neighbors wouldn't invite the LDS missionaries in but said they'd pray for them.  Obviously the neighbors weren't praying that they'd find more people to baptize. They were praying for their eternal welfare that they thought was in jeopardy.  there were smiles on both sides. I don't really know how one could be offended by that.
  11. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Maureen in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    I honestly think some are taking this too seriously. It would seem a contradiction almost that the Lord wants us sealed as families and champions family relationships as the most important on earth and through out the eternities, yet the size of sealing rooms sometimes prohibits those close family "relations" to witness the single most important event of one's life.  I have read all this responses and none of them ring true to me. I honestly can't think of a single reason why the Lord wouldn't want a person to have cousins, friends and other support staff there to witness the sealing. I think it's simply that  this is how temples are designed and constructed traditionally. I think my own practical suggestion that maybe they don't want to have to use microphones in a large group so everyone can hear is closer to the truth  than anything else.   
     
    What impact would it really have if the Salt Lake Temple were to reduce the number from 14 to 12, take four rooms and make them into two.  With two large rooms to accommodate very large families. I'm not asking that ALL the rooms be made bigger. Just a couple. I don't think it's going to make that much difference. The sealing of the dead won't be affected. Are live sealing rooms even used for work for the dead? Every time I've done sealings it's in a different part of the temple in the same room. Not anywhere near the wedding rooms.   
  12. Like
    carlimac reacted to Jane_Doe in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    I agree that modern wedding ceremonies are largely cultural and have a lot of non-sensical traditions in them.  Like why do chairs need to be put in body bags?  (or "seat covers", whatever you call them).
     
    That's one reason I'm a fan of separating the wedding and sealing: to have all the cultural/fun/traditional stuff, and then have the things of God. 
  13. Like
    carlimac reacted to Jane_Doe in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    I'm a HUGE fan of dropping the 1-yr wait.  It means that friends and family of all faiths can attend the earthly wedding, and then the heavenly joining can occur with reverence (separated from the its-a-party mentality).  Of course, if someone wanted to do both in the temple they could too.
     
    I also don't see larger sealing rooms reducing the number of temple sealing to occur-- with the exception of Salt Lake, I don't see many of the temples being over-booked as is.
  14. Like
    carlimac reacted to Backroads in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    Seems we would have to undergo a major change in temple wedding culture. I'm not opposed to larger sealing rooms but it would be a burden on marriage scheduling if a greater number of small sealing rooms were dropped in favor of fewer larger ones.
    I too am not opposed to dropping the one year wait on sealings, which could help change the culture, but only as long as people prefer to see the wedding over the sealing.
    Now, I'm also in favor of dropping government-sponsored marriage, which just leads back to cramming people in a sealing room.
    I'm sorry, it's early, I'm sick, and I don't know where I'm going with this post.
  15. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from prisonchaplain in Are LDS as 'judgmental' as Evangelicals are? Maybe you should be!   
    FWIW Prisonchap. I knew exactly what you meant and it never even occurred to me to take offense at your title. I have enough "Christian" friends that I can understand the distinction.  It's simply semantics.
  16. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Maureen in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    It was just an idea. I'm really trying to figure this out and that was one possibility that came to me. In any case, no matter when they were built, they all ended up small(ish).  Maybe it's a practical matter of not wanting to use microphones for a larger crowd.
     
    I guess I would be one who would actually be happy for the opportunity to separate out the wedding from the sealing with out the 1 yr penalty box wait. Civil wedding first with a sealing immediately after that day or within days if possible.  It would make the sealing even that more special. 
  17. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Litzy in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    It was just an idea. I'm really trying to figure this out and that was one possibility that came to me. In any case, no matter when they were built, they all ended up small(ish).  Maybe it's a practical matter of not wanting to use microphones for a larger crowd.
     
    I guess I would be one who would actually be happy for the opportunity to separate out the wedding from the sealing with out the 1 yr penalty box wait. Civil wedding first with a sealing immediately after that day or within days if possible.  It would make the sealing even that more special. 
  18. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Litzy in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    It would be nice if they at least had one or two that are twice as big as the largest one. Each of our families have to cut our temple lists in half. 
  19. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from Backroads in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    It was just an idea. I'm really trying to figure this out and that was one possibility that came to me. In any case, no matter when they were built, they all ended up small(ish).  Maybe it's a practical matter of not wanting to use microphones for a larger crowd.
     
    I guess I would be one who would actually be happy for the opportunity to separate out the wedding from the sealing with out the 1 yr penalty box wait. Civil wedding first with a sealing immediately after that day or within days if possible.  It would make the sealing even that more special. 
  20. Like
    carlimac reacted to mordorbund in Sealing rooms not big enough   
    I stand corrected. I have reread the portion dealing with wedding parties and it deals more with open invitations than immediate (large) family.
     
     
    It's on page 68 of The Holy Temple if you're curious to check my work.
  21. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from nrakimom in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    So you think that because she has PMS and feels like crap she is "deliberately withholding something that (s)he knows the other partner considers important to a continued fulfilling, healthy relationship."  Honestly?    
     
    She is not being punitive. I assure you.  Let's see...you are coming down with the flu, achy , chills. And you're constipated up to your eyeballs, stomach hurts, bloating, gas, the works.  And your wife comes to you feeling all hot to trot wanting to hop in the sack with you. Then gets petulant when you say, Honey i really don't feel well. Maybe in a few days.  Then claims you have issues but the fact that she had some affairs awhile ago makes your issues equal.     Think about it.  Bridling passion really does allow for more true love. 
  22. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from nrakimom in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    I swear, even the discussion of men not getting what they want when they want it turns mens' defenses on high alert and  brains off. Go back and READ the original post. Use reason when you actually answer her question. 
     
    How did this turn into a scenario where she is intentionally with holding sex just to spite him? 
  23. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from nrakimom in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    I'm talking to everyone like they're my enemy. I have PMS!  :)
  24. Like
    carlimac got a reaction from nrakimom in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    Didn't you read her post where she said she DID ask him what he meant by issues and he referred to "those" five years.  She knew exactly what he meant.   
  25. Like
    carlimac reacted to Just_A_Guy in Is PMS comparable to infidelity?   
    This tangent about deliberately withholding intimacy has little to do with the OP; rather it addresses this suggestion to the OP. You're talking to me like I'm your enemy, Carlimac. I'm not.