Autumn811

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  1. Autumn811

    Troubled in my heart

    I was baptized when I was 14 years old, but my parents became non practicing after a few years. I did not continue with the church when I got older, until now. I started attending my ward 3 months ago. I was so excited when I would come home, I would share the gospel with my fiance. He became interested and also started attending and meeting with the missionaries a month ago. He instantly fell in love with the ward and we study every day. He brought it up to the missionaries that he would like to be baptized. But we face a great delema. The church is telling us that we have to be married before he can be baptized. I am disabled, and I was just handed a full scholarship to college...but on the basis that I am single with only my income counted. If I was to marry, I would lose this scholarship/grant because my fiance's income is just high enough to throw a wrench into everything. I met with the bishop last week about this subject because I knew it was coming. I mentioned that Joseph Smith talked about 3 kinds of marriage. Time, Time & Eternity, and just eternity. Why couldn't we be married in the church for eternity only for now so he can be baptized? The answer given was no, it has to be recognized by the state also. So in order for my fiance to be baptized and receive the gift of the holy spirit, I have to give up my dreams and goals. I'm also made to feel like I'm standing in the way of his salvation if I choose school. My heart is completely broken. I am considering leaving the church. I guess this is my last ditch effort for someone to hear my cry of help. I just want to do the right thing, but I also want to better our life and be able to return to work someday so I'm a contributing member of society.