dahlia

Aren't there online missionaries? Didn't Hyena start talking to elders online?
Anyway, lm0913, there are a lot of former Catholics on this board (myself included), so you aren't the only one who has had these feelings. There must be something about Mormonism that speaks to us.

Last time I looked, there were criminals and charlatans of all faiths - or at least the claim to have a faith. Maybe that's the first indication that they are not what they say they are. Lemme see - I'm a good Mormon, I haven't seen you for years, and the first thing I do is ask you for money to go to a funeral. Why didn't your radar go off then?
 
You probably don't know me, OP, but I was a lawyer in a past life. I can't tell you how many times clients' problems were caused by their own poor choices in life. You let this person use you by giving in the first time. The 'friend' then knew exactly what kind of person s/he was dealing with and had no issue with asking you for more money. And you, having not learned your lesson, provided even more money.
 
What is your purpose in coming here - to say all LDS are liars and cheats? For us to get up a collection for you? Some people enjoy getting used, and then playing the martyr when things go wrong. I'm sorry these things happened to you, but you openend the door.

I keep forgetting to ask in the advice forum:  "Do you want sympathy or advice?"
 
I'm convinced that some of these posters would want to hear something like:  
 
"Oh no!  That's terrible!  You poor thing you!  I can't believe that happened to you from one of OUR members!  Let's form a riot and give him exactly what he deserves!  We'll call his Bishop and he'll make sure he pays up or else!"
 

I'm going to be brutally honest here.  You made the decision to "loan" this person money.  A lot of money.  Somehow this person heard about your settlement I'm guessing and used you and a past friendship to their advantage.
 
Someone you hadn't heard from in 4 years.  And you just loan money like that?  And wasn't one time enough?
 
I'm sorry you are going through some tough times with medical issues..but at the same time I can't feel much sympathy for the lending of the money.

It likely they don't understand. Unless one has experienced a psychological issue themselves (or has been close to someone who has) at some point or received some sort of training or education it's generally hard to understand beyond a nebulous intellectual level. They simply lack the frame of reference to accurately put themselves in your position.

I'd agree that friendship shouldn't have a price . . . directly.
 
But the higher the price tag of an item that a "friend" absconds with; the more grave my concerns about that "friend's" personal integrity become.  It's one thing to get a DVD mixed in with my collection of 100+ other DVDs and just plain forget that it was borrowed--or even to lose the DVD entirely.  It's quite another when it's a major appliance that I know darned well isn't mine.
 
Fundamentally, though, I like your rule of not lending stuff to friends.  :)
 
And, Dahlia--"Go all Mormon on this" might have just become my new favorite phrase.

Y'all are better people than I am. Let me get this straight - you (OP) moved out of your condo and left the washer/dryer. Someone you knew moved in and you rented your condo to them? Is this correct?
 
If so, as a landlord, you had a tenant that just freaking stole your stuff. You can go all Mormon on this and decide not to pursue it, and I will understand that, but at what point do your own rights come into play? The machines are yours. Not 'were' yours, are yours. I'd send a nice, 'you're my friend and everything and we don't want this to get messy' certified letter saying they had 5 days to return your machines in working order or you were going to file a claim in small claims court. You can't threaten criminal action, but I'd sure have it in the back of my mind. They STOLE your stuff.
 
I couldn't be friends with people who stole my stuff and then took an attitude with me about giving it back. Why would you want to be friends with people like this? I can assure you, they do this now, there is more malfeasance just waiting to happen.
 
People always tell you who and what they are, most of the time folks just don't want to listen.

Y'all are better people than I am. Let me get this straight - you (OP) moved out of your condo and left the washer/dryer. Someone you knew moved in and you rented your condo to them? Is this correct?
 
If so, as a landlord, you had a tenant that just freaking stole your stuff. You can go all Mormon on this and decide not to pursue it, and I will understand that, but at what point do your own rights come into play? The machines are yours. Not 'were' yours, are yours. I'd send a nice, 'you're my friend and everything and we don't want this to get messy' certified letter saying they had 5 days to return your machines in working order or you were going to file a claim in small claims court. You can't threaten criminal action, but I'd sure have it in the back of my mind. They STOLE your stuff.
 
I couldn't be friends with people who stole my stuff and then took an attitude with me about giving it back. Why would you want to be friends with people like this? I can assure you, they do this now, there is more malfeasance just waiting to happen.
 
People always tell you who and what they are, most of the time folks just don't want to listen.

Y'all are better people than I am. Let me get this straight - you (OP) moved out of your condo and left the washer/dryer. Someone you knew moved in and you rented your condo to them? Is this correct?
 
If so, as a landlord, you had a tenant that just freaking stole your stuff. You can go all Mormon on this and decide not to pursue it, and I will understand that, but at what point do your own rights come into play? The machines are yours. Not 'were' yours, are yours. I'd send a nice, 'you're my friend and everything and we don't want this to get messy' certified letter saying they had 5 days to return your machines in working order or you were going to file a claim in small claims court. You can't threaten criminal action, but I'd sure have it in the back of my mind. They STOLE your stuff.
 
I couldn't be friends with people who stole my stuff and then took an attitude with me about giving it back. Why would you want to be friends with people like this? I can assure you, they do this now, there is more malfeasance just waiting to happen.
 
People always tell you who and what they are, most of the time folks just don't want to listen.

Y'all are better people than I am. Let me get this straight - you (OP) moved out of your condo and left the washer/dryer. Someone you knew moved in and you rented your condo to them? Is this correct?
 
If so, as a landlord, you had a tenant that just freaking stole your stuff. You can go all Mormon on this and decide not to pursue it, and I will understand that, but at what point do your own rights come into play? The machines are yours. Not 'were' yours, are yours. I'd send a nice, 'you're my friend and everything and we don't want this to get messy' certified letter saying they had 5 days to return your machines in working order or you were going to file a claim in small claims court. You can't threaten criminal action, but I'd sure have it in the back of my mind. They STOLE your stuff.
 
I couldn't be friends with people who stole my stuff and then took an attitude with me about giving it back. Why would you want to be friends with people like this? I can assure you, they do this now, there is more malfeasance just waiting to happen.
 
People always tell you who and what they are, most of the time folks just don't want to listen.

Do they have a legal/moral reason for keeping them? Are they claiming them as an offset for a debt you owe them or maintenance they did on your condo, for example?
If not, I'd sue them in small claims court and report them to local police. Yeah, you were a bit of a schmuck; but this is still thievery and they WILL do it to someone else, because that's the kind of people they are. (Right?). I submit that you might have a moral obligation to their future victims. If you won't stop them, then who will?
(As for the original question: no-brainer to me. They swindled you; the relationship's over. You don't need to get all dramatic and tell them why it's over; but you sure as heck don't need to seek out their company anymore. Let them fade out of your life.)

Wait. That doesn't rhyme!

My son had shingles a few years ago. It's unusual for a young adult to have it, but it was a stressful time for him. I'm thinking his immune system must have been off because he got H1N1 and pneumonia the same year and he's rarely sick, much less really ill like that.
 
I read that you can get shingles even after the vaccine, but that you get a lighter case that doesn't last as long and is less likely to result in the long term pain that some people get.
 
I'm thinking it's worth it. I just didn't want to be sick from the shot. And yes, I talked to my pharmacist, but I'm tempted to say 'you get the shot and let me see how you react first.'

Vegan lasagna:  http://blog.fatfreevegan.com/2006/03/my-favorite-lasagna.html
 
I just use Italian Seasoning instead of all the separate spices and don't use extra mushroom, just what may come with the sauce. I've also omitted the spinach and used various brands of vegan 'ground meat crumbles.'  My omni son loves this stuff. You'd never know there was tofu instead of ricotta. 
 
It's less labor intensive than it looks, and once ready, you just need to pop it in the oven and set the timeer- you can whip it up and then go on FB for an hour. : )

I got it. No problem with side affects. Not a problem of any kind. I had a friend who got shingles. She was in agony.

One frequently reads/hears that the Prophet or the Church leadership has said it is better not to do something. Ex: Better not to get tattoos, better not to get more than 1 ear piercing.
 
My question: Is doing those things a sin? When does behavior that is disapproved of become sinful, if ever? Telling me something is 'wrong' is not the same as telling me it is sinful. Maybe it's just my interpretation, I dunno.
 
 

Nobody going to the movies lately?
 
I just saw 'Maleficent.' Beautiful, thought-provoking, probably not good for very young kids, but tweens on up.

When I'm eating eggs, I do something similar (w/o the meat). Just piping in to say that you can make a batch and eat them the next day or two, so you can make them when you are awake, but eat them when you are sleepy.

That's what I get for asking a question. 

I forgot, I also watched 'Captain Phillips.' I don't care what the shipmates say about its veracity, it was an exciting and interesting movie. Hanks was great at the end.

I know I'm capable of a lot. I've already proved that to myself and others. In my twilight years, I just don't want to be bothered with a lot of church obligations. I just wanna go to Sacrament Meeting and feed the missionaries once a month.

I rolled at that one. I think I know 3 people who would make that statement in all seriousness.
 
I got a 75 - "Unbelievably privileged; check it hourly."   I was a bit less than serious with some of the answers, but then so were the questions. Still, I admit to a fair amount of privilege. Private school, a sister who was a debutant, college in Europe, all that kinda thing.  Until I went to college, I thought all white people were rich. I was shockec to see a whilte janitor in the dorm, but that's probably because I grew up in DC, where, in our crowd, the white people we knew did very well.
 
The thing is, I remember seeing job ads for 'colored' and 'white' as well as segregated housing. When I was a kid, it didn't matter how much money we had, you couldn't try on clothes in a lot of the DC department stores. We ate in the car at the drive in, not because we wanted to, but because we couldn't eat inside.
 
So, if the laws changed and my parents were able to get a bit of privilige for themselves and their progeny, do you think I'm going to feel guilty about it? Am I going to feel bad because I've been able to give my son even more opportunities? No way. Like the Jewish student in the article, a lot of people 'paid' a high price for me to be where I am. I'm not going to insult them by minimizing their contribution.
 
dhalia - whose life is full of first world problems - and darned happy about it.

You might hire an exterminator, who will know several ways of getting rid of rats without harming pets. You can't always do everything yourself.

I wonder if my son will ever get married and make me a grandma.
I wonder if there will be a treatment for diabetes that will let me drink a nondiet Pepsi again.
I wonder if I will ever get married again.
I wonder if I will ever meet Benedict Cumberbatch (a girl can dream).
I wonder if I will ever be able to play a guitar "just like a ringing bell."

Funny!
 
You know I wanted to rant about why the heck people in this country celebrate Cinco de Mayo and you took the wind right out of my sails. That's hard to do, so I have to give you props.