classylady

I agree with this.  Especially with the attitude, "I can be forgiven so let me do it anyway."
 
One of the big questions is...Could you forgive yourself if you did this?

Had another thought.  You mentioned how you see this with your mom's side of the family - are their 'personalities' similar? You don't have to answer that but just keep in mind that different types of people have different energy levels so don't compare yourself to those that are of a different nature.  If you're naturally more like a river or the ocean, that will not look the same as someone who resembles a geyser or waterfall. It's all good so work with it, not against it.

- Make sure you eat food that has life-force in it (real food - veges, fruits, nuts, sprouted bread...).
- Don't overeat and keep meals simple (the body needs a lot of energy for digestion).
- Drink plenty of water.
- Peppermint essential oil (diffuse or put on bottoms of feet) - quality matters (should smell more earthy than candy-like).
- Make sure your environment is uncluttered (major drain on energy).
- Don't be too sedentary - get up and move regularly.
- You can also paddle energy (check youtube or google for how).

Just because your TSH is within normal range doesn't mean there isn't a thyroid issue.  My TSH was normal but I was sick and my symptoms pointed to Thyroid.  I begged for an antibody test for about 18 months.  Because my TSH was normal the insurance wouldn't cover the cost.  I finally told my doctor I would pay for the test if it came back normal.  He called himself to tell me my thyroid antibodies were off the chart and to apologize.
 
Please ask your doctor for a full thyroid panel.

It's too bad you can't afford to get medical testing. The best case scenario is to work with a qualified health care professional. A lot can change with your hormones in 20 years. Even so, if you were on the low end of the reference range you could still be hypothyroid, the reference ranges for most hormones are considered by many experts to be too wide of a range.
 
Ideally the following suggestion would be done in addition to lab tests to help narrow down your individual needs, but it can still be a somewhat useful tool as a stand alone as well. There are many who believe that the most accurate measure of your thyroid hormone status is your body temperature. It is thought that an ideal peak temperature of 98.6 degrees should be reached mid-afternoon. However it is usually more achievable to get a morning temperature. Morning temperatures are thought to be best right around 98 degrees when taken under the arm-pit over a ten minute period.
 
Keep track of your temperatures daily as a habit for several weeks to see what kind of trends manifest. It is normal to have fluctuations up and down a little with your cycle. If your temperatures are consistently low you have a few options. First, if it is at all possible you could take this information to your Dr. and get your thyroid hormones checked again. If they are still in the normal range, but on the low end you might ask about a low dose desiccated thyroid prescription such as armor thyroid. Continue to monitor your temperature to see if the dose is right. If the Dr. thing really just can't happen you could also try a weaker thyroid glandular supplement (such as this) that has the actual thyroid hormones removed, but still has other factors that help to support an under-active thyroid. Once again continue to monitor your temperature to see if it's working, it will likely take a little while (week) before you notice a marked improvement. If this does not get your temperature in range do not exceed the suggested dosing. If you're feeling more energy even without an ideal temperature than it may be worth continuing to supplement, otherwise if the temperature and your energy don't improve I would discontinue using it.
 
You may also find this link helpful:
http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/temperature/ 

Low energy can have multiple causes. It could be due to a struggling thyroid or adrenal glands, sleep deprivation and so on. while you might find some short-term success with some adaptogens such as ashwaghanda and rhodiola, long term you will likely have better success with a complete lifestyle over-haul. I'm partial to the nutritional ideas of Dr. Joel Fuhrman and would urge you to get into his books if you're really interested in learning more about picking up your energy levels.
 
If the full lifestyle modification is just not your thing you might also try licorice root, vitamin C with bioflavanoids and a good multi with B complex.
 
DO NOT take my word for any of this... look into adaptogens, adrenal fatigue, low thyroid, and dietary and lifestyle behaviours you can use to influence such things to learn and draw your own conclusions.
 
I hope your energy perks up.

This is probably the best advice.  Thank you so much!  I needed to be reminded that she will find her own way and her own husband.  I will do my best to play it cool. 

Speaking to the issue of use/viewing vs. addiction, go to 1:23 (almost 1:24) in this video.  It's a news story about tells a woman's experience, but that particular few seconds speaks about this topic specifically.  http://www.azcentral.com/videos/news/local/gilbert/2014/04/23/8040355/

Pam's wrath ?? I wouldn't be afraid of her or her wrath. Lol!!

My father died when I was six, nearly seven years old.  When I think back on it, while growing up, the biggest fear I had was "what if my mom dies too?"  I was so scared of becoming an orphan.  Where would I live?  I didn't understand that I wouldn't be homeless, and that there was family that would take care of me.  I was also afraid of my siblings and I being split up.  Now, I look back, and think, how ungrounded this fear was.  It would have been nice to have had an adult reassure me (us) that we would have a place to live, and that we would not be split up if my mother should happen to die too.
 
Now, some harsh facts about children when a loved one dies.  They are not going to remember the deceased one, or at least have very few memories as time goes by.  That's  why pictures, journals, even short notes are sooo important.  I don't remember my father.  I would give anything to have a few pages of a journal.  One page.  One paragraph.  Anything hand written by my father would be priceless.  A hand written letter to each of his children would be a treasure.  In our family circumstance, my father died in an accident, so it was sudden, and there was no way to prepare for this.  But, I'm thinking that I want to write letters to each of my own children even though I am currently healthy.
 
I had a 19 year old daughter die in an accident almost 11 years ago.  Her youngest brother was nine years old at the time.  Several years after her death, my son came to me, in tears, and said "Mom, I'm starting to forget Shelly!"  Sadly, it is a fact of life, that as time goes by, memories start to fade.  So whatever you can do to help the children to remember their mother would be helpful.  There's already been some good advice given.  Do video tapes, scrap books, vacations, etc.
 
One of the most comforting truths that I had as a child growing up, was that I knew our family was a "forever" family.  I knew that because my parents were sealed together in the temple, that if we lived worthily we could be together again.  I look forward to the day when I will see my father and daughter again.  What a comfort the Plan of Salvation is.  It is the greatest blessing our Father has to offer us.

I wasn't going to say this, but I decided to anyway at the risk of Pam's wrath.  Don't get mad at me Pam, but, similar to how you freak when it snows, even a little, some people freak at a teensy tiny earth quake.  lol

We've covered this topic before, but I'll respond as I always do. I try to be tactful in my wording while making my point. I would also agree with, Classylady, that it's not worth battling back and forth with someone that must have the last word in. I could name some threads now where I've left the discussion hanging because I didn't feel it necessary to squeeze in the last word. While this decision can be frustrating at times, because no resolve has been met, I can't help but assume that "last word in" from the other person was at least satisfying to them.
 
 
I understand the language barrier thing but not personally, as to the extent that Anatess says she experiences. English is my first language, I speak and read French very well, and I can muddle my way through Tagalog and Spanish. I can't say that I've noticed any major cultural differences when participating in my Frenglish forum. Sure, there are some blunt posters, but overall I haven't experienced cultural clashing. Now... off the internet I head butt my husband's side of the family a lot, they're native Netherlanders and just tend to be outspoken people, and don't flinch with their tactless approach. I've learned that this is a cultural difference. They're not intending to be rude, but in my cultural, their "tone" can certainly come across as such or even arrogant. I have no idea how I would come across if I attempted typing in Dutch in a Dutch forum to Dutch people. Possibly, I'd come across as the rude and arrogant one? Hard to say.

I usually just ask Palerider what's going on.  He can be biased, but he's not as bad as MSNBC or FOX.   

My father died when I was six, nearly seven years old.  When I think back on it, while growing up, the biggest fear I had was "what if my mom dies too?"  I was so scared of becoming an orphan.  Where would I live?  I didn't understand that I wouldn't be homeless, and that there was family that would take care of me.  I was also afraid of my siblings and I being split up.  Now, I look back, and think, how ungrounded this fear was.  It would have been nice to have had an adult reassure me (us) that we would have a place to live, and that we would not be split up if my mother should happen to die too.
 
Now, some harsh facts about children when a loved one dies.  They are not going to remember the deceased one, or at least have very few memories as time goes by.  That's  why pictures, journals, even short notes are sooo important.  I don't remember my father.  I would give anything to have a few pages of a journal.  One page.  One paragraph.  Anything hand written by my father would be priceless.  A hand written letter to each of his children would be a treasure.  In our family circumstance, my father died in an accident, so it was sudden, and there was no way to prepare for this.  But, I'm thinking that I want to write letters to each of my own children even though I am currently healthy.
 
I had a 19 year old daughter die in an accident almost 11 years ago.  Her youngest brother was nine years old at the time.  Several years after her death, my son came to me, in tears, and said "Mom, I'm starting to forget Shelly!"  Sadly, it is a fact of life, that as time goes by, memories start to fade.  So whatever you can do to help the children to remember their mother would be helpful.  There's already been some good advice given.  Do video tapes, scrap books, vacations, etc.
 
One of the most comforting truths that I had as a child growing up, was that I knew our family was a "forever" family.  I knew that because my parents were sealed together in the temple, that if we lived worthily we could be together again.  I look forward to the day when I will see my father and daughter again.  What a comfort the Plan of Salvation is.  It is the greatest blessing our Father has to offer us.

Change is always tough.  But, I'm liking the new lds.net.

My father died when I was six, nearly seven years old.  When I think back on it, while growing up, the biggest fear I had was "what if my mom dies too?"  I was so scared of becoming an orphan.  Where would I live?  I didn't understand that I wouldn't be homeless, and that there was family that would take care of me.  I was also afraid of my siblings and I being split up.  Now, I look back, and think, how ungrounded this fear was.  It would have been nice to have had an adult reassure me (us) that we would have a place to live, and that we would not be split up if my mother should happen to die too.
 
Now, some harsh facts about children when a loved one dies.  They are not going to remember the deceased one, or at least have very few memories as time goes by.  That's  why pictures, journals, even short notes are sooo important.  I don't remember my father.  I would give anything to have a few pages of a journal.  One page.  One paragraph.  Anything hand written by my father would be priceless.  A hand written letter to each of his children would be a treasure.  In our family circumstance, my father died in an accident, so it was sudden, and there was no way to prepare for this.  But, I'm thinking that I want to write letters to each of my own children even though I am currently healthy.
 
I had a 19 year old daughter die in an accident almost 11 years ago.  Her youngest brother was nine years old at the time.  Several years after her death, my son came to me, in tears, and said "Mom, I'm starting to forget Shelly!"  Sadly, it is a fact of life, that as time goes by, memories start to fade.  So whatever you can do to help the children to remember their mother would be helpful.  There's already been some good advice given.  Do video tapes, scrap books, vacations, etc.
 
One of the most comforting truths that I had as a child growing up, was that I knew our family was a "forever" family.  I knew that because my parents were sealed together in the temple, that if we lived worthily we could be together again.  I look forward to the day when I will see my father and daughter again.  What a comfort the Plan of Salvation is.  It is the greatest blessing our Father has to offer us.

If it went another day, and you hadn't mentioned anything on Facebook, I would have.  I figured you were aware of it.  And, I didn't want to be a whiner.

Wow how fun that sounds.  I'd love to do the same kind of thing.

DH and I took the whole family (7 kids) on a road trip that started at Great Basin National Park in Nevada.  We drove up to Jackson, WY, and drove through the Tetons, and then Yellowstone.  We continued on north and drove up into Canada, not going too far north, just Lethbridge.  We then drove through Cardston, down through Glacier National Park, and then to Lake Coeur d'Alene.  After that we drove to Seattle, and then down the coast to Mount St. Helens.  After that drove the coast of Oregon, Northern California and the Redwoods, San Francisco, and then came on home back to Utah through Reno.  Our baby was about 15 months old.  Our oldest was 18 years old.  Anyway, to get to the point, a road trip can be great fun!  The whole family enjoyed the trip.
 
When traveling with a toddler, make sure there are plenty of stops to let her out and run around.  Also, snacks and toys will help entertain her.  We had several cd's that we brought along, and you might want to have something age appropriate for her.  By the end of the trip our 4 year old daughter had memorized all the words to The Phantom of the Opera cd that we had brought.  I'm not so sure her older brothers and sisters appreciated her mastering all the songs.
 
Does your daughter have her passport?  I think it's needed now days to get into Canada.  (not absolutely certain of that)
 
Have lots of fun.  I want to go on a road trip too.

DH and I took the whole family (7 kids) on a road trip that started at Great Basin National Park in Nevada.  We drove up to Jackson, WY, and drove through the Tetons, and then Yellowstone.  We continued on north and drove up into Canada, not going too far north, just Lethbridge.  We then drove through Cardston, down through Glacier National Park, and then to Lake Coeur d'Alene.  After that we drove to Seattle, and then down the coast to Mount St. Helens.  After that drove the coast of Oregon, Northern California and the Redwoods, San Francisco, and then came on home back to Utah through Reno.  Our baby was about 15 months old.  Our oldest was 18 years old.  Anyway, to get to the point, a road trip can be great fun!  The whole family enjoyed the trip.
 
When traveling with a toddler, make sure there are plenty of stops to let her out and run around.  Also, snacks and toys will help entertain her.  We had several cd's that we brought along, and you might want to have something age appropriate for her.  By the end of the trip our 4 year old daughter had memorized all the words to The Phantom of the Opera cd that we had brought.  I'm not so sure her older brothers and sisters appreciated her mastering all the songs.
 
Does your daughter have her passport?  I think it's needed now days to get into Canada.  (not absolutely certain of that)
 
Have lots of fun.  I want to go on a road trip too.

Inconceivable!

I don't watch a lot of current television.  Like Pam, many of the series mentioned, I have never watched a single episode, nor have I even heard of them.  Though, hubby did start watching "The 100".  I haven't watched an episode all the way through, but it sort of caught my eye.
 
Some series that I have or do enjoy:
 
Warehouse 13 (similar to xfiles, but a little more upbeat)
All of the CSI's and of course NCIS
 
My mind is blank at the moment.  I can't think of what I really enjoy.  Lately, I seem to watch more British television than American such as the  old comedies like Red Dwarf, Are You Being Served, Keeping Up Appearances.  The PBS dramas are excellent.  Agatha Christie's Hercule Poirot is an excellent series.  The acting of David Suchet is wonderful.  I like most all the BBC Detective/Inspector Series, like A Touch of Frost,  Inspector Morse, Inspector Lewis, etc.  Some other British or Irish shows that I have loved are Ballykissangel.  This is one of the best shows I've ever seen.  Also love Doc Martin.

Whenever I hear a swear word, I cringe.  Thankfully, my family and friends do not use swear words.  My environment now is such that unless I am watching TV or a movie, I rarely hear a swear word.  (When I was working that was a different matter).  And I try to stay away from movies,  tv shows, or books that have bad language.   I won't say that family/friends never use bad language, but it's rare.  I've gotten after my kids for saying freakin'.  I've told them that every time they use that word, I know what they are exchanging it for, and my mind automatically goes to the harsher word.  I don't want to hear that word, I don't want to think that word.  And especially in my home, I don't want that word.
 
When I go out shopping or I'm out and about, and I hear kids and adults swear or take the Lord's name in vain, my attitude is one of sorrow.  Not one of shock, because I've heard it all, and not much shocks me.  But, my Spirit is definitely bruised when confronted with such language.  And when I hear women speak with a foul mouth, I am especially saddened.  I will take class over crass any day.

Bini, I'm so sorry this happened.  It might help you emotionally to report what happened.  I think it's good that you shared.