richards

Consider separation within your own home for awhile. Make rules that you won't say anything rude or demanding, sleep in separate places, don't demean or treat each other rudely. Date.

If you are still in school you can find a counselor or school psychologist to tell you what course of action to take (in terms of seeking help, etc).

Please don't base your testimony solely on things in the bible. Don't forget that we believe the bible so far as it is translated correctly. In addition, the Old Testament and rules in the first 5 books were fulfilled by Christ. That doesn't mean there isn't value in them, but read the New Testament and Book of Mormon for Christ-related information.

Just looking at your Thread "She's mad and I don't care" my reaction is when somebody is mad don't let them control your feelings or what you care about. That only strengthens their anger behaviors. It gives her reason to be angry in the future because she can get you to care that way. I really hate it when people use anger, aggression, and nagging to get their way. I really hate it when people let others control them through these means.

My 7 yr old daughter has been in treatment for a few years for anxiety and selective mutism. Here is some advice from a fellow traveler: 1) Not all psychologists, counselors, and therapists are cut from the same cloth. Cognitive behavioral treatments have the strongest evidence base for anxiety disorders. For young children behavioral approaches are great. If you don't know what I am talking about, that is fine. If a therapist doesn't know what I am talking about then you have a problem. Psychodynamic therapies do not work for children. 2) Some things that you can do that will help: 1) remove all forms of punishment (spanking, time in closed rooms, yelling, nagging, etc) from your parenting, 2) Create a clear schedule, especially with summer so she knows what is going to be expected from day to day, 3) make sure that she isn't engaging in cleanliness or other anxiety decreasing rituals, hair pulling, or refusal to talk, because those are possibly much larger problems than simple anxiety (OCD, trichotillomania, and selective mutism). Some aggression and agitation could be depression or anxiety related keep that in mind in her relationships with you and her siblings. 3) Medications can work if combined with GOOD therapy. 4) Prayer, blessings, scripture study and keeping in touch with your personal values is extremely important. As parents my wife and I have had to do this to help us with the anxiety and depression feelings that are partially a result of our daughter's problems. We have been through a lot with her! These are a few things that might help. I wish you well. If you have further questions, feel free to ask.

I am a recovering agnostic who has been active in church throughout my personal faith crisis primarily because I want to remain married and accepted in my family. Recently as I pay attention in conversations about church, etc. I have been bothered by something. There seems to be a lot of conversation about "God's plan for me" and "pray about what God wants you to do for this or that" and "receive personal revelation" or "I feel like I am living in line with what God wants me to do" etc. It is like our heavenly father has specific expectations for us and our families (which job, car, or even what summer programs our kids involve themselves in). As I think about agency, I think that a micromanaging God is in conflict with our doctrine. It seems like agency is a two-choice dilemma instead of an array of good choices and one incorrect choice. I am just curious (and I am horrible at philosophy) is it a Calvinist belief that we are predetermined to make choice x, y, and z to live in line with a plan that God has for us? If so, is this belief a doctrine of men that is in conflict with divine agency? A related matter is that of predetermined family relationships such as those in Saturday's Warrior. Think of the stress that it puts on an individual to "find" the person they loved in the pre existence. I am curious to know people's thoughts on these issues.

If your fiance was raised LDS, and used to attend church, but has chosen a different path, then the wedding may be offensive to the most religious of his relatives. For many LDS people, 'leaving the church' is among the worst things an individual can do, and getting married in some pagan setting would symbolize a break with the faith he was brought up with. Also, the reason that I mentioned the white supremacist thing is the Odinism that many white supremacists follow (Asatru seems to be associated with Odinism). When I googled asatru the interlocking triangles symbol came up, which is a common symbol employed by white supremacists.

I wouldn't feel uncomfortable as long as it isn't a white supremacist thing.

I dated my wife for about 2 years before my mission. We frequently spoke about how we wanted to get married. Before I left I asked her to promise me that she wouldn't do anything immoral with another guy while I was gone, and in return I would focus on my mission and be the best I could be and I wouldn't worry about her more than the people in the state where I was serving. I returned home about 10 years ago. She wrote me throughout the mission, so I wanted to get married soon after I returned. I came to find out that she had engaged in some inappropriate sexual behavior with another guy (she didn't go 'all the way', but it was something that required repentance). She hadn't bothered to take care of the repentance process while I was gone, and she wasn't really apologetic for what she did. She was embarrassed that I found out though, and I think she had some regrets about what she did, but not about pursuing a relationship with the person. That led me to an irrational line of thinking that I should engage in the same immoral acts with her. The anger towards what she did would come up about once a week between us, and I am surprised that she stuck with me. We received a lot of pressure from friends and parents to marry, and unfortunately from our bishops as well. We began attending the same ward and shortly after that bishop began pressuring us to marry. We went and confessed what we were doing and he counseled us separately, she to move on and not talk about what she did, and me to marry her and forgive her, and both of us to move on and sin no more. After that I felt great. I didn't even think about what I saw as her betrayal of me. I really suppressed my feelings about it. Shortly after we were married, every time I felt rejected for sex or in our relationship, feelings of anger regarding what she did while I was on my mission began to creep in. I entertained the feelings. I began to lust after other women and fantasize about hurting my wife emotionally the way she hurt me. I wished I had it in me to commit adultery so that she could understand how I felt about what she "did to me". You can see the irrational thinking that I started to entertain. 8 years later, I still have negative feelings every few months along with fantasies about being with other more "chaste" women. I bring up my feelings with her from time to time and she gets mad at me. That makes the problem worse. It is apparent to me that I have a psychological problem, but I also have a religious problem. How do I forgive my wife? I feel like I am surrounded by darkness from time to time from which I have no escape. Should I tell her how I am feeling? What should I do?