Diane2011

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  1. I've been counceled by the Bishop to write my letter to the First Presidency regarding the reason for our divorce ( marriage of 25 years, but I'm only 45!) I understand my ex, whom I have had NO contact with now since he met and is cohabitating when she is in town,(met online , she lives in Canada!He California! ) and he there. There was a lot of abuse, alcoholism and lying in our marriage the last 10 years. I stayed for the childrens sake and put up with all of it, until he visited a " friend" on what I believed was a Painting trip with a buddy, and it was yet another online woman he found and went to meet her for a week, this was back in 2005. He told me son last week that he was asked to state his " feelings" in his letter from my Bishop and said he wrote he wants nothing to do with the church, does not want to be sealed to me or the children anymore because these are not his beliefs and that he wants nothing more to be " rid" of me now and for eternity. He didn't mention any lies, though I sincerely have my doubts. No letter has been recieved by my Bishop yet. He had told me in the past when I remarried 2/ 1/2 years ago that he would " never" allow me to be sealed to someone else, that my current husband can have me on earth but HE will have me in Heaven. Well, ok, but we were sealed in 1996, 2 years, if that , later he began smoking again, drinking to the point of passing out, calling me all sorts of names, accusing me of affairs which NEVER happened and was not a nice father to the kids. They are mostly grown now, except my 17 year old, who hasn't really known him for the past 10 years ( we've been seperated by distance while he took care of his parents 60 miles away, but in the mean time he was online with all these women pretnending that he wasn't even married! ) What do I put down in the letter?? If he just writes " he can have her" , great, but it just doesn't sound like my ex! He will realize this the LAST thing to hold over my head and make it terrible and lie through is teethe I"m afraid, but yet told my son he JUST said yes. What would you do? I tried for MANY years to make my marriage work, counseleling through church and privatly, but it did nothing. There was no communication there and he was more in tuned with these internet woman than his family. He still is. Has not seen our son , the last one home , since Thanksgiving 2010. Honestly we had an amazing co-parenting friendship before he me this new women of 2 years from Canada, but since then he has closed joing bank account that were only used for child support, my internet service, my AAA, among other things. I don't want to bad mouth him, even though he won't see it but he wasn't always this way, and we would probably still be together if he hadn't change, but he changed so very drastically, and wouldn't hear my pleas to make things better, I had to ask him to leave. When I found out he was still seeing the Indiana woman and the Canadian woman , that was it and I filed for divorce back in 2008. I was married to a wonderful Temple worthy man in 2009 and we are so anxious to be sealed! What sorts of things should I write?? I'm not a mean person, and I know he could be ex'ed for all he's done. He has no relation with the church for nearly 11 years , really if not more. Any advise would be VERY appreciated and I need to get this done by Sunday! Thank you all, Di
  2. I was told when I was endowed 15 years ago that wearing " undies" under the G's bottoms were a personal choice, especially at certain times for women, and also about the bra being worn under the G's were ok too. The " next to the skin" for the G's as we are told , especially more so today, is meant to mean under the normal clothing we wear. I've asked several Temple matrons through the years and a couple of years ago talked to the Temple Presidents wife who I was sitting with at one time in the Temple, she said some things have " changed" a bit from what was said years ago, not changed to the point where we choose when and when not to wear them on days we don't feel like it of course, but changed as per clothing worn with or under them. Does that make sense?
  3. I found the new Carinessa Tops were out when I was mistakenly given THEM instead of the chemise tops I was ordering at the Distribution center at the L. A. Temple! So I got them completely by accident, though I was questioning the sister there on sizing because I'm only 5'2" and 110 lbs, usually the bottoms are way too long even with the petites, and the tops I need larger busted than they come *( they need to correct this next I believe! ) So I was ordering the xsp chemise and got a Carinessa instead! She kept saying she didn't know " how " I had gotten the wrong size last time, which was a week before , when they " had only gotten them in last week! ", and this was in early January! So I've been wearing these ever since. I go to the Temple quite often and just a couple of weeks ago took some sister missionaries who needed to purchase things and I happened to look at the Irregular bins and voila! I found the First Cariness bottoms ( which fit me MUCH better in the petite sizing!) and a bunch of the new Carinessa tops , so tried a few different sizes and found the perfect sizes for me now. LOVE these! The cap sleeves are pretty tiny compared to the other cotton/ ones or the chemise tops and they don't have the lace edges which show under nice silk or satin tops and dresses! Still though , the bottoms are always too long on me, so I'm going to have to put in a custom order with the correct sizing I think, so they don't fall over my knee and hang there! A sister at the Temple Dist. also told me it's not the ENTIRE G's that are most concerning, it's the symbols, and they will custom make g's for different " special" needs other than disabilities, such as dancers, actors, etc. Which would come in quite handy for those who feel they need to remove them to work , or are in a public place where they will be seen , like myself.
  4. "That's a tough question. Is FB causing more divorce? Possibly. I know that I married my husband just 3 months after my divorce was final. I reconnected with him on FB. He was my friend before the divoce, but he certainly did not cause the divorce. My exhusbands drugs, lieing, cheating, and infedellity did. " I agree completely, my ex had emotional affairs with women online before Facebook was around. He would use ICQ and Yahoo messenger and just " meet" people randomly on there. The friends that I have on facebook are mainly friends from Elementary, Jr, and HS that I've KEPT in touch with through the years, not that have just " found" me there. The man I married 2 years ago was someone that I considered my BEST friend over the course of 20+ years, even through both of our marriages and my then husband was also friends with him and his family. We had dated in Jr/HS , but we parted as friends and I married at 18. My ex started finding these " Internet friends" and it just went downhill from there. So after 25 years of his mental and physical abuse, drunkeness and online and then real affairs, that was IT for me! I remarried a year after my divorce was final and I married my best friend, and the man I should have been with to begin with all those years ago! But we live and learn, and we wouldn't be the people we are if we hadn't gone through what we did seperately. I am friends with men and women on Facebook who aren't family, but I'm NOT one to even have an emotional " affair" with someone , I"m devoted to my husband and I have zero doubt that he is completely devoted to me.
  5. Hello everyone, my name is Diane and I live in Sunny California near Santa Barbara , at the Beach. I was baptized in 1995 along with my two girls and my now ex husband was baptized a week later. We were sealed in the Los Angeles Temple 1 year and a week later with our girls and our then 2 year old son. I recently re-married ( 2 years ago) to my Jr High/HS sweetheart, an amazing man, 30 years to the date after we first " dated" ( with our parents on an outing, as we were both only 15! ) We kept in touch after I was married for all but 10 years, and then he found me on Classmates in 2000. Our families were always friends, and it was wonderful hearing from him again ( he had married and divorced after only 6 years of marriage, I was married for 25 years to my first husband) Our Wedding was beautiful, he gave us both the wedding of our dreams, but not in the Temple as he was not a member at the time. He has always been interested in the church and investigated off and on through the past 11 years that we've been back in touch. We were always the best of friends, he also with my former husband. He began taking the discussions again right before wedding, but with a serious smoking habit, baptism committment took a while before he was completely ready and able to give cigarettes up completely. He surprised me a few weeks before his baptism by setting his date as the day before our First Wedding Anniversary, and was confirmed on our First anniversary! ( What more could I possibly want or need for my wedding gift? ) This year, on March 27th, his 1st Baptism anniversary date, he was ordained an Elder, and we celebrated our 2nd Wedding Anniversary the next day! We are now in Temple Prep classes and he is getting ready to receive his Endowments while I await my Sealing Cancellation ( which I will posting questions on, for any who know the process involved, please help! ) We have 5 children between us from 15 to 27, and 2 wonderful Granddaughters. Heavenly Father brought us back together again after 30 years, after many of life's experiences, celebrations and tragedies and both of our divorces ( his after 6 years, mine after 25 years! Both of our former spouses cheated. My ex stopped attending church only 2 years after we were sealed, and hasn't had anything to do with the church for 10 years now. He was not able to baptize our son, who waited on him to BE able to do so, but finally gave up 4 1/2 years ago at age 14 and was baptized by our bishop. This year my Husband will be ordaining my son to become an Elder, which is just one of the greatest blessings that Heavenly Father has given to our family! ) I am a Family History Consultant for my Stake ( if anyone needs help with your family history I am happy to help! Just ask! ) and attend the Temple as often as I can, usually at least once a month if not more. My husband went to the Temple to do Baptisms 2 weeks after his baptism!He is very excited to be able to go to the Temple with me soon, and it will be SUCH a blessing to have him there with me. I"m very happy to have found this forum, and very Thankful to Heather for starting it. I've looked at many postings the past couple of years but never posted anything, now I plan to become an active member here, and post a lot of questions I have, hopefully all of you who can answer, will! Thank you for allowing me the honor of introducing myself , I hope to get to know many of you here! Diane