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About Marriageinprogress

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  1. Marriageinprogress

    Unsure about going back to the temple??

    UPDATE: I had my meeting and interview today with the Bishop. I was 100% honest and answered all the questions honestly. I figured the Bishop could go either way but he felt that I was ready and worthy of a temple recommend. I have a temple recommend!! It's been years, I think 2008 since the last time I have been in the temple. I gave my temple dress away to a young sister that needed one, I guess I will have to find a new one Thanks everyone who gave me advice and words of encouragement.
  2. Marriageinprogress

    Unsure about going back to the temple??

    Thank you for your advice! I went in 6months ago for an interview so I could go participate with the youth in baptisms for the dead and answered all the question honestly and wasn't able to get my reccomend. I understood but it was really embarrassing.
  3. Marriageinprogress

    Unsure about going back to the temple??

    Thanks Jenamarie! I have thought about it, that the temple might be just what I need to overcome some of my challenges. I'm just so worried about being unworthy and not having a good enough testimony to go in. I want to answer the temple recommend questions with confidence and I don't feel I can do that right now.
  4. Marriageinprogress

    Unsure about going back to the temple??

    Yep.. I knew that one was coming!! I do everything (read, pray,..) out of obedience but not necessarily wanting to. If that makes sense. I don't wonder where my testimony has gone too. I understand that I am stubborn and have allowed pride and hurt to stand in the way of my progression and relationship with my Heavenly Father. I guess my question to myself is "do I have enough of a testimony to answer the questions honestly to receive my temple recommend?"
  5. Marriageinprogress

    Unsure about going back to the temple??

    My husband and I were married in the temple in the year 2000. We attended regularly for the first 7 years of our marriage and then didn't go hardly at all due to just not making it a priority. We have had some pretty serious challenges arise in our marriage in the last several years and my testimony is very shaken. My husband and I have been asked to meet with the Bishop to renew our temple recommends this Sunday and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I don't even know if I believe in the Church. My Bishop tells me I have a testimony. I serve in two callings in YW's but I still can't say for sure that it's true. Should I wait?
  6. Marriageinprogress

    If no one judged me, I would __________.

    stop feeling that I need to look like one of the celebrities on the front of magazines and start appreciating the body and beauty that my Heavenly Father has blessed me with. (shallow, I
  7. Marriageinprogress

    Members And Non-Members, Does It Work?

    My friend married a non-member and she never put pressure on her husband to convert. She loved and respected him despite her desire to have him join the church. She is such a great example of being patient, trusting, and having faith. They had two beautiful daughters together and she took them to church every Sunday alone. She had missionaries over for dinner once a month and relied on her home teachers when she or her kids needed a blessing. It was so exciting for everyone that after 15 years of marriage, her husband decided on his own to take the missionary discussions. He was baptized and a year later the family was sealed in the temple. Amazing family and story. The husband has been a member for 6 years now and he holds the priesthood, has a strong testimony, and serves in his calling.
  8. Marriageinprogress

    Well, My Interview is Online...

    I had recently discovered your blog a few weeks ago while searching for hope that my husband will be able to overcome his lust and porn addiction. Coincidentally, I saw this thread and noticed that you were the guy from the blog I have been reading. I have to admit, that was the first podcast I have ever listened too. Please forgive me if I sound unsympathetic or judgmental. I respect your tenacity and commitment to straighten out your life. It was a great interview and you have worked very hard to make yourself worthy to be re baptized. My husband's actions of being involved with lust/pornography have left me pretty beat up emotionally. He kept it a secret from me for almost 13 years until he exposed himself last year (we are approaching our 14 year anniversary). My 18 year old step-son who lives with us is also addicted to lust/porn and has been since he was really young. It's heartbreaking. My goal that I wanted to achieve from listening to your interview was, to have a better understanding from the addicts view so I can stop being so hurt by my husband and be more understanding. As I was listening, I felt bad for the little boy that was innocently exposed to pornography. I was upset that your childhood was robbed because of an inappropriate image and felt sorry that had happened to you. As the story progresses my feelings of sadness went to frustration as to why you weren't getting help and stopping this behavior. You knew that it was wrong and yet you still continued to hide it. (sorry) I think it was great that you were able to serve a worthy mission! ...and then your back at it. I hate the sin but not the sinner. You sounded so sincere when you were speaking of your ex-wife. I thought that was really neat. I guess, I expected you to be resentful that she didn't stick by your side and help you through this mess that you had gotten yourself into. I appreciate your comments about how your stake president was a great help to your wife and that often times we focus on the sinner and forget about the ones affected. I go to the church 12-step program with my husband but haven't found much help. I feel that there should be a different manual written for the people that have been affected by the addict. I wish my Bishop would call me in and check on me. I haven't told anyone of my husbands or sons problem and I feel alone in trying to deal with this. Back to you... Every time you mentioned that you would slip up, I wanted to shake you (sorry). Why does it have to take so long to overcome? Was your fight not strong enough or is it that hard to overcome? I think your journey back to the church is very respectable. Despite your life being a complete mess you still found hope and faith that through the Atonement, you could be healed. Awesome, I admire your faith and trust (can I borrow some). Then, overtime you get a stake calling. Wow, he must be a pretty amazing guy that you were entrusted with this calling and over technology of all things. When you said it was a calling over technology my first reaction was, are they crazy? Keep him away from technology. Obviously, those men were inspired to call you and you have done a great job. I might not sure if I should have laughed but I did when you were being speaking about being re baptized and you had a slip up. That the stake president wanted to be done with you and preform a baptism for the dead for you. After much hard work on your part, you made it. You were found worthy to be re baptized. Thank you for your testimony, it really touched me that we can all be healed. Congratulations!! So, it is possible. Do I have a better understanding? NO, but maybe I never will and just need to accept what has happened. I wish I could ask some personal questions about how you feel about lust and porn today but I don't want to be disrespectful (I'm sure you are thinking that I have already been, sorry) I am grateful that I came across your story and that you have been willing to share it. Thank you and great job!! Disclaimer: Sorry for any typos, I don't have time to proofread before I post this :)
  9. Marriageinprogress

    Lacking trust and faith..

    I have a really hard time turning my life over to The Lord. I want to have trust and faith, but I won't allow myself to trust that God will work it out. I joined the church 13 years ago and have always struggled with parts of my testimony. Sometimes I think I'm so tough I can do it all by myself. Sometimes I feel as a member of the church, I'm told how to act, feel, how to dress, what to drink, what kind of undergarments to wear, what to watch and listen too, what I'm allowed to do on Sundays, and etc. Don't get me wrong, I have a long list of things I love about the church. My thoughts are all over the place. Did I lose everyone?? ..or maybe you fell asleep?? Anyone have any thoughts for me? I really need Heavenly Fathers help to carry this weight on my shoulders or better yet, I would love hand it over. ?
  10. Marriageinprogress

    Soccer on Sundays?

    I just listened to the talk with my whole family and it was great. We all needed to here thesw words from our Prophet for different reasons. Thank you!!!
  11. Marriageinprogress

    Soccer on Sundays?

    We did make it clear and they agreed to accommodate her so she could play on the team but when it comes game time on Sunday they start putting a lot of pressure on us for her to play. We have never given in but we feel the disappointment from the coaches, players, and parents. I think what it comes down to is, it's my problem. I secretly struggle with not allowing her to play and when I have more trust and faith this won't be such a problem. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
  12. Marriageinprogress

    Soccer on Sundays?

    I'm a convert also and I guess I need to gain a testimony of what the Sabbath Day means to me. I was raised and competeing in mutiple sports and received a scholarship for college, I want to argue that it wouldn't hurt to play 2/3 three soccer games a year to help her team win a championship. I'm pretty stubborn and I feel that if my daughter can't play on Sundays 2/3 times a year than we should probably turn down the position on the allstar team. The team works together and develops to prepare themselves for the playoffs and then we no show on the most important games. She was asked to play on club teams but we declined because they play on Sundays all the time. I know it's just soccer and such a small part in her life but sports was such a huge part of my life and created great experiences and memories that I will never forget. Sorry. Again I'm just venting. (Better on here than to my husband, he feels disappointed that I struggle with this)
  13. Marriageinprogress

    Soccer on Sundays?

    My 10 year old is a stand out soccer player and was asked to play on the spring select/all star team. We accepted under the condition that she wouldn't be able to participate in games on Sundays. This decision has been so hard for me (Mom) and my daughter. I never allow my daughter to see my struggle with this commitment but stay strong and encourage her that she is doing the right thing. I feel horrible that she has to feel the weight of the disappointment from the team, parents, and her coaches that she doesn't play on Sundays. I feel frustrated keeping this commitment when our Bishop watches the Superbowl on Sundays, families vacation, watch sporting events, travel, etc. and yet my daughter can't play in a couple Sunday games throughout the year. Also, championship games are always played on Sundays and our team was undefeated going into out championship game on Sunday and we didn't attend and the team lost. At the following practice a teammate told my daughter you are the best player on the team, we would have won if you were there. Sorry, I'm venting and struggling with this. My husband is fully committed to keeping the Sabath and is fine missing the games. My daughter gets sad when she misses a game but understands why we don't take her.
  14. Marriageinprogress

    Almost had sex affair. Help

    I've had a similar experience in my life about 3 years ago. I'm sure you feel hurt and justified with your behavior with his other woman but then guilty at the same time. What you are doing is wrong and you are having am affair, emotionally and physically. I was you and I was wrong and turned my life upside down because I let the hurt and pride I felt towards my husband numb my emotions enough where I found myself involved with another man. My advice. STOP! You will not be able to do this without a confession to your Bishop and wife. Believe me I thought I could do it by myself but failed every time and so will you. The affair is wrong and stopping it as twisted as it sounds will feel like a break up, loss, and leave a void because it was substituting feelings that you are lacking with your wife. I confessed! To the Stake President, Bishop, and my husband. EXTREMELY hard but I chose my less than perfect husband and beautiful children over my affair. I think a very important thing I did to end the affair was actually tell the other man that my husband and church leaders knew what I had done and it over. I told him not to call or interact with me in anyway that I was committed to working things out with my husband if you would accept me. The process was painful but worth it. I sought help from a therapist which was very helpful. My was determined to fix my huge mistake and prove to my husband that I was remorseful and felt terrible about the affair. I never blamed him, got defensive, or justified the affair. (I saved my crazy talk for my therapy sessions). My husband forgave me, (thankfully, I thought he would divorce me) and we are still married and raising our four amazing children together the way if should be. My marriage is still a work in progress but it gets better and better almost everyday;). Nobody ever said it would be easy but they said it would be worth it! Good luck with all this mess. My therapist told me something that I live by now: "You are capable of doing hard things". That statement really empowered me and its true. You can also clean up this mess if thats your true desire. Make a decision to confess and start the repentance process.
  15. Marriageinprogress

    Trying to move forward...

    I am having a hard time moving forward and forgiving my husband. He has been secretively been viewing porn and lusting after women in his day to day life for the last 10 years and I found out a couple of months ago. I believe that he is sincerely sorry and is moving away from this behavior and I know I need to forgive him but I am so stubborn and hurt I am can't get myself to do it. The negative memories from the past when I thought that this was going on and he denied it are all coming back. I don't know how to just forgive and forget all the hurt and lies that I have experienced. Has anyone been in this situation or have any advice for me? thanks