Hyena

Just A GUY That's the feeling I got when I encountered this question. That by the simple virtue of there being these well defined, organized, and delineated roles specifically spelled out for men in a clear and concise hierarchy vs women simply being lumped into "relief society" caused some concern. Of course, i fully understand that to a strong, independent woman in modern times, the idea of men being seen as in any way even remotely "superior" or having any type of "authority" over women is a red flag of concern. I think people have been fighting the concept of gender roles and identity so long now that they've lost the ability to separate a real gender inequality issue from a negative perspective. In truth, I don't think they realize that having priesthood power doesn't give men some sort of exalted or elevated status with which to RULE over women, only that it seems to focus on the duties and different functions of their respective gender roles within the service to the Lord. Heavenly Father made us two types (Male and female) for a reason, and child bearing isn't the sole explanation for that. Still I'm not sure what I would say to an investigator to alleviate her concerns or explain the reasons why things are as they are in a way that would quickly satisfy someone with zero experience of the church, doctrine, or its structure.

That's a good thought mrs. Jenamarie. In truth that did bother me as well because it kinda made me feel like "well you're a MAN so you're more prone to sinning cause you're less perfect." I certainly don't feel like I'm an inherently deviant person. I'm 30 and still have remained abstinent, I don't have an affinity towards porn or the desire to use women as sexual objects. But I'm still curious as to why there aren't like nuns or a similar structure for women. Is it just due to the time frame the church was founded?

Wingnut, would you kindly please tell me your opinion? I'm very interested in hearing all perspectives as I acknowledge I'm still very very ignorant in the ways of our Church. Thank you!

Thanks for that! I guess it's a question that comes up a bit. I think it is because we hear so much about the various types of priesthood authority that men have.

I was just wanting to get some broader perspectives or thoughts on a question I had posed to me earlier this week. On a visit to an investigator with the missionaries, the investigator asked during a discussion of the various priesthoods and their levels (aaronic, teacher, apostles, etc) and she asked what do women have. The missionaries explained something of how the sisters have relief society and how women or daughters are exalted above others on his shoulders or something and that men are more prone to carnality or temptations of the flesh than women are and that's why we need the priesthood and they don't. Can anyone share some thoughts to help me understand in case I'm ever approached with this again? Thanks

Still a little confused... So when you ask for priesthood blessing you don't ask for anything specific? The priest administering the blessing is the one that follows the spirit And just gives you a random blessing based off of what the Spirit tells him is that correct?

Lol thank you. I appreciate the advice. I just am a "thinker" I always wonder about things. I'm sure when the time is right she will let me know. For now I just want to ensure I'm living the Gospel as best I can. :)

Thanks everyone. I'm still very confused on many facets of our faith. I was too embarrassed to ask my ward members for fear of looking like a putz. I'm thankful for everyone's insight and explanation. In truth is really like zero chance I'll end up that girl anyway. I guess I was just hoping some divine intervention might illuminate things and give me a hint as to take a chance or just focus on more important things and just stay friends. I think ultimately I know my answer. Focus on the church, my calling, and helping my ward family in any capacity I can. Maybe that's what the bible meant about church being a bride. Love, if and when it comes, we come when God is ready for me to have it.

I still don't fully understand the scope of the priesthood and its blessing ability. I know that you can get a healing blessing if sick, can have the holy ghost bestowed upon you, and get a patriarchal blessing which is more like a revelation or fortune telling(?) to my knowledge? But what about other things? Specifically, there is a woman I am acquainted with that I have become rather smitten over. We get along well enough, but I was wondering if it is possible to be blessed by a priesthood holder to help know if she is someone I should indeed pursue avidly or if there is a blessing to help promote romantic feelings or growth together? Maybe a blessing to help me seem more appealing to her in that which she would like for a romantic partner? I'm just uncertain what the rules for blessings and such are and figured I'd ask here in anonymity instead of embarrassing myself asking a real ward priesthood holder lol. Thank you.

Thank you both, that helped a lot! I guess I just wondered why he couldn't have just tied him up or something and then pretended to be him. But I understand now that they would have known no peace because Laban was also a descendant of Joseph.

Can someone explain to me why it was important, necessary even, so much that, yea, the spirit compelled Nehi, even against his desire to kill another person, to murder essentially an unarmed and helpless man essentially in his sleep? What about love thy neighbor, even thy enemy? It's the one thing that really bothers me about the book of Nephi 1 . Please help me understand? Thanks.

Thanks everyone for your responses. I think I know what I might say to her. My heart goes out to her, I know how cruel this world can be in regards to how we treat people who are less attractive. It's not right but it's also part of life. People fall in love with their eyes, the heart follows later. All that nonsense about "it's whats on the inside that counts" is about as realistic as trying to stop the tide with a spaghetti strainer. People judge by the outside first and if they can't get by what you look like they'll never get the chance to know what is in on the inside. Even if they do, they'll never get past the outside anyway because people have an affinity to aesthetic appeal. The heart wants what the eyes want. That'll never change, so we should all just accept it and move on.

Love, to me, is one of the greatest, and simultaneously cruelest, gifts bestowed on us by Heavenly Father. On one hand it seems we have the agency to choose whom to give our love to, but in regards to whom we actually fall in love with, there seems to be very little agency at all. I understand how some of the advice by well meaning friends here is meant to have yours and hers best interest at heart. But in ways I also think that sometimes people forget what it is to be laid low by unrequited love. We seldom get to choose whom we love and contrary to popular belief, feelings of love can't simply be transfered to someone else on a whim. The heart wants what the heart wants, and for some of us there can and will be no one else... in this life or perhaps even the next. I think there is also a lesson here on the responsibility of being direct with people. True kindness is not sparing someone's feelings from being hurt by refusing to acknowledge the truth. She should have told him straight out that friends were all they would ever be. How difficult is that to do really? If she was afraid of losing a dear friend, then that speaks to a.) her own selfishness that she'd put HER needs above his, and b.) that there was no trust or faith in the friendship on her end, that she would assume that by being honest and true with him would result in him not treating her with the same kindness in return. Often I feel that women in general have a difficult time with candor in affairs of the heart. Men are pretty much straight forward and blunt in their affections and desires, but women tend to be more secretive and coy, and refrain from any type of direct and open confrontations on the subject. ALL of this poor soul's problems could have been prevented had she simply been honest and upfront about the status of their friendship from the jump instead of playing "maybe, maybe not" games. I guess I sympathize with him because I live in a similar situation. I have been in love firmly with the same woman for the past four years. I have made efforts to reveal my feelings and in ways she somewhat responded. I have told her I love her and she has responded in kind. But when I suggest a possible relationship, she's given me really cryptic responses. When I finally in frustration said why don't you just tell me yes or no and that it means we'll never be together then. Her response was, and I quote, "Never say never. None of us knows what the future holds." Really? Great, sure that's definitely not giving someone hope, right? Of course it really matters not whether she gives me hope or not because I decided long ago it would be her or no one. Seeing as it appears it will never be her, I've settled confidently on a life of humanitarian service and devotion to the church. I have no regrets. Some of the greatest loves in history have been unrequited. I will use those feelings and channel them into great works of love in the name of Jesus. What could be a more fitting tribute? I harbor no ill feelings, I wish her the best. I just know that no one will ever take her place in my heart and I'm fine with that. I don't need to date or search for someone else or force myself to try to love another or stalk her around begging and pleading. I will be here if and when she ever needs me because I love her and I care about her no matter what the nature of our relationship is. That is my suggestion to you, sir. Take that love you feel and refocus it. Put it into your work like you did on your mission. Give yourself completely over to God and follow the teachings of Christ and your life will be much more fulfilling in ways no woman could ever hope to match. If you truly ever loved her, and I know this is cliche', but then love her enough to let her go. Love her enough to be happy that she has found happiness and purpose in life. Pray to Heavenly Father for the strength to be a better man and thank Him for letting you know the experience of real true love. Find solace in that your heart was capable of such a beautiful gift as the gift of love. And realize your own great worth. With love, your Brother, Hyena

Someone posed a question to me I don't know how to answer or how to help this person. Essentially, without going into too much detail, this person is suffering because they are single and alone. Granted they are obese and consider themselves unattractive (I try not to judge so I won't offer my opinion on the matter) but they've apparently been praying for years fervently for companionship or for heavenly father to aid them in losing weight. So far, it seems their prayers have gone unanswered, the person they are infatuated with thinks of them naturally as just a friend, they suspect because of their size and appearance. They have expressed that they are fast losing their faith... after all, how could Heavenly Father stand to see his child so lonely and isolated and feeling unloved? Why are their prayers not being answered? I wish I knew what to say, where to turn, how to convince this person that Heavenly Father does care and does hear their prayer. Any advice to comfort a tormented soul?

Yes I did. I talked them for months. It really helped make things less awkward and nervous. I'd recommend it to anyone. Honestly, by the time I had met real missionaries I was pretty much prepared for everything to the point that I'm certain my missionaries thanked Heavenly Father for such an easy conversion. By the time I had met them I had already Learned the basic lessons, had read the Book of Mormon, determined it to be true, fully believed Joseph Smith was indeed a prophet, and was pretty much an LDS member in my heart. The only obstacle to overcome was my fear of meeting new people and the actual act of life changing baptism/conversion. Since then my quality of life and mental health (ie happiness) have improved 10 fold. I love this church. My only regret is that it took so long to find my family and home. I think of all the years wasted and I weep.