quilter

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Everything posted by quilter

  1. I wish it was all that easy to just let it all go. When you're getting divorced no one really know what to do with you. It seems like "they" are all happy for my husband who is moving on and found a "new love" and when he just gets married everyone will be comfortable again. He's repented and everything is now great. For the person who is left with the 5 children...well that's just uncomfortable for everyone. I just need to get over it and move on. Move on to what? Get on with my life to what? What if it was me that went off and left and he had to figure out what to do with 5 children, find a way to support them, and live happily ever after? There's alot to obsess about when you're cooking and cleaning and doing homework, and nurturing children and explaining to them that their Dad loves them and that we're going to be ok and every one in the world just hopes I can "get over all of this and move on". What I'm really learning is that the church and the people in it have all these neat little rules until they don't. And then I'm on my own. So while I'm on my own figuring this all out, he's dating, and going to church with her and staying at each others places, and living happily ever after. Frankly I'm exhausted, and I'm tired of always putting on a happy face.
  2. How about if your husband is dating and is having his "friend" spend the night at his place? Well more like the weekend? Either she is at his place or he is at her place. And they go to church together on the weekends too. What constitutes adultery?
  3. I never said anything about excommunication. Are people excommunicated because they are dating while they are still married and working out all the details on divorce?
  4. "Choose your love, and love your choice." I think the question is to ask yourself if you are 100% committed to your marriage and to your husband? The challenge seems to be with your thoughts about the situation and seeking confirmation from the Spirit. I wonder sometimes if the Lord says to us "Why do you keep asking!?!" I agree with several of the other comments, when you are committed to your choice, and your behavior follows that choice, the anxiety will dissipate and you will feel peace line upon line that will increase over time.
  5. I only got 2 e-mails back on my initial post and I didn't realize there had been so many comments. Thank you. Just reading the comments has helped me calm down tonight. Here's my new questions. Really, I should go tell my bishop that he's dating? What's he going to do about it? Secondly, When we divorce, and my spouse remarries, can he file for a cancellation of our sealing? I thought the men could be sealed to more than one woman but women could only be sealed to one man. So if I got remarried, I would be the the one to cancel my first sealing. Anyone know the truth on sealing cancelations?
  6. I've been temple married for 35 years and we have decided to get divorced. The day after we decided, my husband signed up for several dating sites. He started dating right away. He showed me responses and pictures. He even told me about a few of his dates. All this shocked me and hurt me deeply. It's now been 8 months and he's serious about someone. He has not told me about this relationship but others have seen them together and have told me about it or asked me if he's having an affair. We are not divorced. He's telling people he is divorced. He takes her to his ward. My question is: Is it acceptable to be dating when you're still married? I'm embarrassed by this behavior and so are our children. I don't think it's appropriate for him to be telling people he's divorced and dating, when he's not.