paracaidista508

You are exactly right...you are not permitted to challenge the church on anything. When I was growing up, if I brought up things  like you have my parents would chew me out and tell me to just accept it and move on. Just like you get here in many cases.

I think needleina needs to quit being a jerk

I think needleina needs to quit being a jerk

You are exactly right...you are not permitted to challenge the church on anything. When I was growing up, if I brought up things  like you have my parents would chew me out and tell me to just accept it and move on. Just like you get here in many cases.

Take the desire away from you...yea right. Other spouse wants to end sex in marriage they can count on an ended marriage. We were not put on earth to be celibate in marriage. Forget that. 

SPAM is clearly a wow violation. Also one needs to see a shrink if they like that stuff.
I used to have SPAM hash and potatoes growing up. Yuck

Yea I saw it. Here I was with popcorn ready for some big change like gays allowed to have the priesthood or something (lol) and find out it was just back patting for volunteers. They did a good job btw, but if it was such a big deal why not broadcast to the whole church???

1st: Your  quote Andon:
"The way I see it right now I can stop all this and go with my plans I had after I got off my mission, and my family will hate me for it and I will always have to tell the story of why I didn't go on a mission for the rest of my life. "
Is this really the way your family rolls? Talk to your parents about that- make sure that is not the case. If it is...wow. I didn't go on a mission and I was sure my family would treat me that way. They were not happy about it and gave me a ton of crap (in a loving way of course), but after I got out of the Army they finally dropped it. I was not disowned or anything like that. As for having to tell the story- yes that will happen to varying degrees. You will be judged for that no matter the reason. Most people don't care though so if this all boils down to you not being able to go- you will have to get over that part. Yes there are women in the YSA wards who would never date or marry a non-RM. You will find those who will. There are plenty of RMs who no one wants to date/marry also, but that is usually because they are lazy and non-productive. Just be yourself and be an achiever.
Now for the weight part- 

I never had a problem with weight until I was the recipient of many injuries two of which involved broken vertebrae. After that healed and I was left with internal organ damage and then nerve issues in my lower limbs, I have had issues with weight because I like to eat. I still maintain a decent fitness level considering and am in better shape than many people in my ward who are younger than me. I'm still kinda fat though and it is a constant battle.

About 7-8 yrs ago I ended up being pre-diabetic. Took a PA to figure it out. I didn't look like it as I am very muscular, stocky and "to me" I wasn't fat. The DR said yes you are and you need to get on a lifelong diet. My physical situation is such that I don't have much endurance and despite exercising every day, weight is a struggle.

Three words for you -                      South-beach-diet
Use it and the weight will fall off of you. You can modify the meals and be successful. My DR said to use it as a template for healthy eating and it would serve me well. My BMI, Glucose, Cholesterol etc all shaped up real fast on that diet and all these years later the blood numbers remain good. Because of that I will now die of other causes instead if diabetes.

no more soda, video games, tv, candy, cake etc... just suck it up for a few weeks and you will get used to it. You can do it.
As for the soda and stuff- not saying you are an excessive consumer of those things but just stop altogether if you do use them and you will be rewarded. Stay busy, exercise a lot and eat healthy. Don't starve, just eat good.
Good luck!

7 Do you support, affiliate with, or agree with any group or individual whose teachings or practices are contrary to or oppose those accepted by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?
I think if one says yes I believe in genocide, practice anti-Semitism, support abortion or vote for government representatives who do, engage in racist activity then yes they can be excluded---well at least from the temple I guess.

Re taking a juvenile priesthood holder with you my minimally informed opinion says that is a bad idea. In scouts we can't be alone with them, but now you want to have one alone with you in your car?  I'd just go alone rather than take someone's kid with me. I don't trust them.

The last two words probably sum it up best. That is why those benefits are there. When they are needed, not when someone  creates their own need.
I'm all for women staying at home to raise the kids and all, but when one marries and has those goals, part of attaining that is setting oneself up to be able to financially afford it. I have lds friends and family who don't think my that is even a factor. lord says multiply so we are; who pays for it matters not the ends justifies the means. Of course random things happen, people lose jobs or whatever, but quitting so you can have more time isn't likely the intent of the program. 
 
 

We have an adult kid on this. So far so good and it is el cheapo.
https://www.libertyhealthshare.org/3-program-options
As for the possibility of taking the part time job with the associated pay cut: I'm thinking that someone who does that shouldn't then go to the govt for govt (schip / Medicaid)healthcare when they placed themselves in that position by purposely taking a pay hit. Not saying you would do that, but it was suggested to you. Part of me thinks that would be a bit dishonest and actually fraud (not literally, but morally) if you ask me. Being able to pay for it before, but going part time not because you have to, but because you want to and then now the taxpayer has to cover it.
 
 

We have an adult kid on this. So far so good and it is el cheapo.
https://www.libertyhealthshare.org/3-program-options
As for the possibility of taking the part time job with the associated pay cut: I'm thinking that someone who does that shouldn't then go to the govt for govt (schip / Medicaid)healthcare when they placed themselves in that position by purposely taking a pay hit. Not saying you would do that, but it was suggested to you. Part of me thinks that would be a bit dishonest and actually fraud (not literally, but morally) if you ask me. Being able to pay for it before, but going part time not because you have to, but because you want to and then now the taxpayer has to cover it.
 
 

Perhaps they have not seen enough real combat then...Then maybe they have and they just cant get enough. I can tell you in my short Iraq tour in my unit we had 1 KIA and 30% WIA (48 wounded).. Freaking mess and it wasnt funny. We were on the winning side of it and thats the result of 166 IED/ Small Arms and coordinated attacks / enemy encounters on our elements, several vehicles totally destroyed. I know the numbers cuz it was my job to keep them for our unit. An additional duty of sorts. This was leading up to and during the surge in late '06 thru 2007.

Made police work look like a joke and I have seen some serious action as a cop. Been involved in a few shootings , witnessed many more, seen a few people blow their heads off in front of me etc. I was desensitized with real life before Iraq and Iraq was an eye opener. I dont know where you work, but Phx area is def a gamer's paradise for the real thing.

Anyway- just my two cents (and thats all its worth). Its my opinion people only get off on killing when there is no consequence. We are raising a generation of people who think its a game. I'd go do it all over again because there are still terrorists out there who need to be killed esp if it meant I could take the place of one of my kids, but the thought of it makes me want to throw up. Thats why these games suck...the combat ones and the others for other reasons. These kids have better things they should be doing.

Perhaps they have not seen enough real combat then...Then maybe they have and they just cant get enough. I can tell you in my short Iraq tour in my unit we had 1 KIA and 30% WIA (48 wounded).. Freaking mess and it wasnt funny. We were on the winning side of it and thats the result of 166 IED/ Small Arms and coordinated attacks / enemy encounters on our elements, several vehicles totally destroyed. I know the numbers cuz it was my job to keep them for our unit. An additional duty of sorts. This was leading up to and during the surge in late '06 thru 2007.

Made police work look like a joke and I have seen some serious action as a cop. Been involved in a few shootings , witnessed many more, seen a few people blow their heads off in front of me etc. I was desensitized with real life before Iraq and Iraq was an eye opener. I dont know where you work, but Phx area is def a gamer's paradise for the real thing.

Anyway- just my two cents (and thats all its worth). Its my opinion people only get off on killing when there is no consequence. We are raising a generation of people who think its a game. I'd go do it all over again because there are still terrorists out there who need to be killed esp if it meant I could take the place of one of my kids, but the thought of it makes me want to throw up. Thats why these games suck...the combat ones and the others for other reasons. These kids have better things they should be doing.

I'm curious if any dedicated gamers here could tally their play time for a month and compare that with the time spent working on their unachieved goals??? I really am curious how much time one spends doing one vs the other. It may say a lot about how much they value achieving the goal. 
Sure it is unscientific, but would be interesting.

I'm curious if any dedicated gamers here could tally their play time for a month and compare that with the time spent working on their unachieved goals??? I really am curious how much time one spends doing one vs the other. It may say a lot about how much they value achieving the goal. 
Sure it is unscientific, but would be interesting.

I'm curious if any dedicated gamers here could tally their play time for a month and compare that with the time spent working on their unachieved goals??? I really am curious how much time one spends doing one vs the other. It may say a lot about how much they value achieving the goal. 
Sure it is unscientific, but would be interesting.

Well gee I feel so bad you are offended.

First off I directed this at the "men" in the YSA wards. Not all of them, just the ones who occupy their free time by wasting it on this garbage while they should be trying to make something of themselves. Theres no helping them. If the motivation of having a real life and a wife is not enough, what am I gonna do? After all they served their missions and are priesthood holders so all the boxes are checked right?? Thats waht they think possibly. Little do they know that is just scratching the surface. Not my problem so long as they stay away from my daughter. Now that you mention it- I also know several older men with kids. wife etc who still cant maintain good jobs, etc because they don't have any time to go to school to improve themselves. They do have time to sit around playing games though. I didn't just make this up, this is what they say they do with their free time. Ive been an Elder for 25 yrs and I have heard it over and over. I do also know some who play games and are just fine, but I would bet they don't spend much time doing it- their wives would kill them.

Back to the YSA topic: Just like many here who are fathers or mothers who feel any young man is not worthy to marry their daughter if they didn't serve a full time mission for whatever that actually is worth, I also reserve the right to label and discriminate against anyone I would feel worthy to marry my daughter. When you spend the better part of three years getting feedback from three different YSA wards, knowing dozens of the young men there, what they do with their free time, what their career aspirations are (or are not) and seeing their progress or the lack thereof well you begin to form an opinion.

I mentioned previously being able to point out about 50 or so who are dead enders or "losers" which they are and show you some real winners. Many constantly whine about not being able to get a good job. Well they have no college or only take one class at a time so likely will never finish. Many say they don't have time for school, yet they play games 20 hrs a week. Employment is also a huge issue. We have tons of jobs available here. Problem is many are unwilling to work a night shift, or on weekends, or outside, or at all. The one thing they all have in common- they burn their free time (aside from complaining about not having the ideal job or school stuff) playing video games. Either still living with mom and dad or with four others just like them in a 2 bedroom apt. Three years later, many of them have gone no where, but they are always out and about on their Instagram or FB thing and when not dong that they are playing games.

As a Father, any dude who is gonna court my daughter better have their act together and display a little bit of drive towards accomplishing something. If they cant even do it when it is easy and while they are single with no kids, how can I know they will be even  worth having around as a son-in-law? I mean am I gonna have to support them? Is my daughter going to have to work extra (more than full time) just because mr mushy body cant get off the couch? Naturally she can choose who she marries, but she complains about the same issues with the guys. She openly acknowledges most of them are up to absolutely nothing. Women tend to marry people like their fathers in many cases so go figure where she gets her opinion. 

I'm not the perfect dad, perfect priesthood holder or whatever. I do work very hard and while doing so to get the employment I wanted which was appropriate for our family, I was aggressive about taking as much school as I could afford and worked two jobs (60+ hrs a week). Good thing xbox or PS or whatever wasn't around then. Id still have just my HS diploma and never would have accomplished what I have AND been able to provide a comfortable living for my family. I expect the same of a SIL.

When I was in the Army as a Private- they instilled in me many principles about leadership to include being aggressive about studying, out working your competition, being loyal, sacrificing your time, money, your last bite of that tasty MRE, sleep and even your life to help a brother out. Every time I went to a school or to some kind of training the motivation coming from leadership was to absolutely win at all ethical costs, be ruthless in the pursuit of success and never leave a fallen comrade. By the same token, those who were not willing to be an asset to the team were promptly gotten rid of. I didn't learn that at church and never would have. Perhaps those are terrible traits and values, but they are what I have and I expect any prospective son in law to at least have a little of each of those values. 

I don't care if they went on a mission, went in the military or went straight to school- if they cant step up and be a man and do everything it takes to succeed then they are by my definition a "loser." If they can do all that and still find time to play games then so be it, but they are not the norm.

Send a 17 year old priest to the Bishop with his iPhone on RECORD and listen to the reaction when he tells him he is going in the Marines instead of going on a Mission. I guarantee you will hear some "discouragement." Better yet, have him go up on Fast Sunday and announce it. That would make for some good drama for the whole ward to gossip about.

Oh my can you imagine what his parents must be thinking??? How humiliating that must be for your parents!!---well that's what happened to me. I'm sure everywhere else the entire ward membership embraces them and tells them good job on their choice...not
 
 

First off- let me be the first to wish you good luck and success in your anticipated career! 
My comments are my opinion from my experience in the Army. Others will have different opinions and experiences vary. Enlisted at age 18 right out of HS- no mission. Served initial 4yr tour in Airborne Infantry- balance was (18 more years) in Reserves or Nat'l guard. Multiple deployments while in the Nat'l Guard after 9/11.

You didn't say if you are male or female, but I'm gonna assume Male. If you have not gone on a mission already and don't plan on it, get prepared to have your military service marginalized by some members of the church since you didn't first serve a mission. While military service is honorable, many members regard it as a cop out or a place for wayward boys who don't serve missions. Many a prospective wife will also regard your lack of serving a mission as a disqualifier. Everyone is free to choose, just be on-notice that military service is looked down upon DEPENDING upon if mission service did not come first. If u already went on a mission- congrats nothing to worry about then.
If you are female- well frankly you can do whatever you want, whenever you want. No obligations in terms of mission service whatsoever.
The availability of religious services will greatly depend upon what you do. Since you are planning on being an aviator- at the minimum at sea you will be on a carrier with 5500 sailors and a couple jarheads. There will be LDS services avail there. Onshore- there are lds chapels near all Naval Airfields. The enlisted ranks seem to have less access but that also depends upon what your MOS (military Occupational Specialty) is. The folks in the rear with the gear will have lots of religious access if they want it. Those in the field dong the fighting pretty much get ignored. The wars we are in now are small unit fights so our combat troops are out in squads, platoons and companies. Not many chaplains to be found, but lots of ammo and tangos needing to be shot.

All in all, there are not too many Mormons around. Military service is discouraged so this naturally results in slim numbers. One also must consider though that the percentage of Americans who serve is only about 2% or less...LDS reportedly 1.4% or less. 1.4% of LDS folks is roughly 18K personnel spread out all over the world and across five services. Given that military service is discouraged, it is interesting that 1.4% ish actually show up. If you look at strict percentages- pretty much no one in the US serves their country no matter what their faith is.

I had a blast, loved my various duty stations, made awesome friends (who actually really would give their very life for me) and got to travel a lot. Iraq was even pretty cool. 
A couple things to keep in mind- if you end up being a fighter pilot or anything that drops bombs or shoots missiles /machine guns you will be killing people for sure. In this Current Operating Environment (COE) there is no escaping that. If you cant do that- fly a cargo plane. No matter what you fly- if you get shot down ----well you can do the math on those consequences. That's something to think about eh?  

I got nuked by a few bombs and have not been the same since. Multiple physical injuries- all of which are permanent are my reward for serving. Too bad-so-sad right?I'm lucky though, I have lost several personal friends in combat so get ready for that- who knows it might be you. Just being real. I wouldn't trade the overall experience for any other.

Anyway- good luck, do good and stay safe!  We need good people out there since so few want to actually serve.
https://www.lds.org/callings/military-relations?lang=eng
 
on edit-
Someone mentioned reading experiences of some of the GAs who have served. I agree except in the case of Paul H Dunn. He was caught lying about many of his experiences in WW2. Although he never (not to my knowledge) admitted which things he did lie about, he did write an open letter to church membership stating he embellished many stories in order to I guess add drama or whatever to them. There was investigative work done by a reporter who proved many things were false. Anyway- he was censured by the church and coincidentally placed on "emeritus" status soon afterwards. Strangely, none of his stories have been pulled from church pubs even though they were admittedly fabricated in many cases. Except for his stories, the balance I am sure would be good to read.

No worse than  ramming twinkies down ur throat, guzzling 64 Oz of doctor pepper and hitting the dessert table at the ward dinner for the third time. All violations by being excessive, but unless it's actually smoke, chew, beer, wine, coffee, tea doesn't seem like a violation to me.
My understanding is that it isn't tobacco, just nicotine. I look at it just like the whole coffee/caffeine scenario. Coffee is outlawed, not caffeine. Hence all the monster drink guzzling people in my ward. Vaping does have the appearance of evil so yeah it will be shunned. Eating in excess should also be shunned as it is a clear violation of the wow, but it is a widely accepted part of our culture so we just do it anyway.