Rockman

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  1. I have been married for about four years. My wife and I have one child and another on the way. We have saved up money for a nice down payment on a house and are in the process of purchasing our first home. We're pretty excited, but when my grandparents found out, they hit the roof. My grandfather has been looking to start a business, but does not have the funds to get it going. When he learned of our down payment savings, he felt I should have invested that money with him, to help him (and my own parents) get the business going. My grandparents aren't exactly on the streets, but they are not in the best financial situation and were hoping this business would help them get somewhere. My grandmother apparently has been crying herself to sleep because she doesn't know where money to help them get going will come from and was hoping my wife and I would be helping start the business. My parents are also hurt by this. I would tell myself to just let it go, except I do come from a culture where generations are supposed to help each other, especially adult children helping parents. I have seen the business ideas, and I don't think it would work well. I want to provide a home for my wife and kids. I also come from a long line of people who are bad with money. I have taken classes since high school on managing my money and feel good about my money sense now. I hate the idea of dutifully giving thousands of dollars to my grandparents when I feel it will just go to waste. I suppose there is still time to back out of the home deal at mild risk if it really is best to help my grandparents. I also don't mind the idea of giving a few thousand dollars to them--but nothing near the size of my downpayment. We have savings left over after the down payment, but I don't want to give that up, either. Should I be helping my grandparents and parents with this? If not, how best to I diffuse everything? Things are tense with my family.