Hi Guys, I'm a member of the LDS Church, my husband is not. He was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer, and while I've been dealing with it pretty well, I'd love to just have a discussion here with other members who have gone through losing a spouse, in particular, but any relation is okay. What's particularly difficult for me is that we don't have children. His entire care is up to me, and it does get difficult to do all my chores, his chores, our chores, plus take care of his needs due to the illness, drive him to doctors' appointments, do all the shopping alone, and just well... watch him slowly deteriorate. The Relief Society has asked me if there's anything they can do, but the problem is what I need is just a 15 minute thing here and a 20 minute thing there, never consecutive, and we live in the boondocks, so it's not convenient to call on members for help. I do have a small staff of people I can talk to like the social worker at my husband's oncologist, my husband's palliative care doctor (who also works with spouses), and my BFF in the church. My husband's cancer is a form of lung cancer, even though he's never smoked a day in his life, and this form has no risk factors. It's called adenocarcinoma of the lung ALK positive. I'm still strong in the gospel, and I know what the future holds after death. But what is bothering me is watching my husband die, knowing that some day I'll have to die too, and wondering if I'll experience this much pain. Also, the time between his death and mine. What do I do? Of course the counselors tell me that there's no guarantee that he'll go first, I may die in a car accident tomorrow, there's no guarantees. I don't know, I'd just love to talk to other caregivers who are spouses and LDS, or as I said just family members and LDS. Hopefully that all made sense. Thanks in advance!