David13

Big deal.
As a first time buyer I got 50% off at Deseret books.
dc

NightSG
I want to make a little suggestion here, which I hope does not offend your religious sensibilities, if it might, the read no further.  I don't want the HR agents after me, nor the Inquisition, for that matter.
Let me suggest that if you think you might go broke on hot chocolate, then maybe you should be out looking for a job, not sitting around chit chatting.
dc

Big deal.
As a first time buyer I got 50% off at Deseret books.
dc

I don't feed the missionaries at home, but take them out to restaurants.
Yes, they all seem to be able to eat like horses, even the skinny ones.
dc

I don't have kids, you know.
That's just the way it worked out.
But, I think you all can be rather glad you are dropping your kids off at MTC.
Rather than the county jail or a prison for them to begin their jail time.
So, I think you can be proud and happy that you done all right.
dc

True the church is not a social club.  But yes we are there to fellowship.  And that's an important part of it.
dc

The other thing is time.
How much time has gone by.
They are waiting to see if in fact you have changed, or it was just a temporary fad.  Just a thing to try to fit in. 
Or is it a total life change that will last?  Will you endure to the end?  Or will you end up back out there in the street with the old ways.
I'm not questioning you.  I'm not asking you for answers.  I'm just saying those are the questions you have to ask yourself, and answer to yourself and to your maker.
Whether those people are smarmy to you or not does not matter.  What matters is who you are, what you will become, where you are going.
I know there are many with me, still the same way.  If I were to read their minds I know they are saying "that guy will never last, he won't make it.  He'll disappear one day soon."
It's just human nature.
I just joined the church (having been called in) at age 65.  Can you blame them for being skeptical?  I don't.  But I know who I am, what I'm doing, why I'm doing it, and where I'm going. 
That's what's important.
And I know, some have told me, that I'm an inspiration to them.
dc

No, affirmative action is racism.  Racism is a bad thing, not a good thing. 
Let's get our agenda straight here.
dc

Emilyloo
I have been a divorce attorney for the last 38 years.
I never advised anyone to get a divorce and I wouldn't so advise you, either.
But there has been some good advice given here.
(And some off topic flak which is best ignored)
But I can tell you that many times filing for divorce caused a spouse to take actual notice of a problem, when they had not previously done so.
And I had quite a few after the divorce was final, and the dust settled, got back together, having finally realized that it was their best opportunity.
Sometimes it takes something to wake a spouse up, either an emotional outburst or some divorce papers.
dc

It's amazing how distorted some people's point of view can become.  In spite of any reality.
dc

This is the second time today I saw a reference to askgramps.  I had known about them, but didn't read, til now.
I think they are helpful.
I think the original question was when do you "feel" clean, and perhaps also feel forgiven.
The hardest part is forgiving yourself.
I think we look for that feeling of release that we get when we forgive someone else.  It doesn't necessarily feel good, but it not longer feels bad, when we truly forgive someone else.
But the most helpful I think is, when the change of heart comes.
Then we feel forgiven and clean.
The change of heart can only come some time after we have followed all the steps toward forgiveness.
dc

Dear Tcrab's Bishop,
You have a very eager volunteer to be your next Ward Mission Leader. 
He is really excited to serve, please give him a calling asap! At a minimum, please assign he and his wife to be Ward Missionaries.
Thank you,
A guy who is swamped with serving inside his own Ward.

The answer to you question is quite simple...
A mission can be of great benefit this is true...  But once you make the choice to get married your priorities must change.  Your priority now is to be the best Husband and Father you can.  Of course no one starts off as their best, they need to learn.  The church knows this... the church supports this.  You need to accept this as your role now and throw yourself into it
Also the church will not allow people with dependent kids to serve full time mission... this includes people (couples) who might gain dependent kids while serving.  While your details of your situation is known only to you, learning how to be a father (and having dependent kids) is what is in front of you now.
Clearly your desire to serve is good... but there are lots of ways that you (and your wife) can be a missionary without signing up for a full-time mission.

Among other things.
The answer is by surrendering your life and fate to Jesus Christ.
My mother has this motto:  "Do your best.  Let God do the rest."

By how you feel when you forgive others.
 
The Traveler

Trump was interviewed a while back about how he plans to address the racial divide and racial tension.  I loved his answer in that interview.  I can't remember which interview it was so I don't have a direct quote, but it went something like this:  What we need is a cheerleader.  We don't need a cheerleader for division.  We need a cheerleader for unity.  I'm going to be that cheerleader.
I loved that answer because, 1.)  he didn't offer or even indicate to offer racist methods to solving racial problems, 2.) he didn't offer, or even indicate to offer legislation as a means of solving the problem.

Yes.  I will grant you the judgment-by-stereotype exists.  The more you adhere to the stereotype, the more the stereotype gets reinforced in society.  Therefore, people like Sterling who has a loooooonnng rap sheet and continues to have the attitude of no respect for authority will make it harder for people like Castille to break out of the stereotype.
The problem with the internet is that singular cases become talked about like it is endemic.. a perception fanned by the electioneering efforts of government riding on a narrative to pad their agenda and appeal to voters.  So you end up with one side chanting Black Lives Matter and the other side chanting Blue Lives Matter... guess what - both are EXACERBATING THE PROBLEM!
I liked your other thread.  Let's discuss this on the basis of the 2nd Amendment.  That's a heckuvalot better discussion because the 2nd Amendment is color-blind.
People are racists.  That's not gonna change.  Heck, I'm Filipino and even with all us brown-skinned pacific islanders we have our own "caste system" of discrimination - the mestizos versus the morenos, the tagalogs versus the bisayas... even the Black people have their own discrimination with Beyonce's lighter skin of higher value than Lupita's darker skin.  The whites have their own with the Polish versus the Italians, etc.  It is an instinctive mortal condition that is deeply tied to Survival Instincts.
Fighting racism by racist methods is, therefore, only going to end up with bad results.  Yes, People are Racists.  The American Rule of Law is not.  So, junk the Black Lives Matter, Blue Lives Matter, All Lives Matter... DUMP IT ALL.  That's exacerbating the problem.  Rather, unite behind a color-blind concept... THE RULE OF LAW MATTERS.  That means, strict adherence to the Constitution, highly competent justice system, respect for law enforcers, and PRESUMPTION OF INNOCENCE, among others.  Miscarriage of justice is fought, people leading a life of crime is fought, police brutality is fought, defiance of authority is fought, jugements-by-youtube-video is fought, all without deference to any race, creed, or color.
It starts with Me and You!

Give me a statute - any statute, state or federal - that is racist.  I'll give you one - Affirmative Action.  That's racist.  So what we do - we fight to change that statute.  A judge ruling is not the Rule of Law.  If a ruling is racially biased, then it's a miscarriage of justice.  You fight for JUDICIAL COMPETENCE... not THE JUSTICE SYSTEM IS UNFAIR TO BLACKS.  It is not.  Just like Black People are Criminals.  They are not.  Mormons eat green jelo.  They don't.  It's a stereotype.  Fighting a stereotype by applying a stereotype LEADS YOU NOWHERE.
You see it differently because you insist on seeing in color and applying individual cases to generalizations.  I insist on breaking generalizations by seeing individuals.  A difference of opinion is not racism.  An opinion based on racial generalization is employing racist methods.  Filipino kitchens smell like vinegar - okay, racial generalization... but harmless, not necessarily racist.  Cops kill innocent black people - racial generalization, can be harmful as it promotes defiance of authority.  Muslims are terrorists - same thing, can be harmful, you understand that one, I'm sure.
A judgment based on a youtube video showing one tiny cross-section of the entire event due to a racial bias is just as UNJUST as a Judge or Jury coming down with the wrong verdict due to a racial bias.
 

I'm not going to argue your statistic because it doesn't matter to my message.  One more time... applying racist methods to solving racial problems - like Affirmative Action - is not going to solve racism.
So, let's say... Blacks are more likely to be pulled over.  Okay.  Sure.  What's your solution?  Cops should stop pulling over blacks?  Cops should pull over more whites?  No.  That's a racist method to solving a racial problem.  Rather, the solution is - Why is that person getting pulled over?  Is the cop incompetent (you can be a blooming racist and still be competent at your job, by the way)?  ADDRESS JOB COMPETENCE.  Was there a traffic violation?  ADDRESS RESPECT FOR AUTHORITY.  None of which are racist methods.
Do you see?

There was a case down in Florida a year or two ago.  A ccw holder got out of his truck and the cop who had stopped him went absolutely beserk and shot him.  Just from seeing the gun on his hip. 
There was a great outcry from the ccw holders about how job incompetent the officer was. 
Of all the people in the world who should not "freak out" when they see a gun, it's a cop.  Just about everybody agreed the cop needs to get into some other field of employment.
The same is clearly true of I think it's the Minnesota case.  After killing the driver the cop is still screaming like a banshee andwaving his gun around like a lunatic, with his finger on the trigger, pointing it at the girlfriend and the child.
Pure insanity and job gross negligence, far beyond incompetence.
If you don't think we believe 2nd Amendment rights apply to all then you need to find out who Colin Noir is.
dc

I'm with anatess. The problem is that many people will recognize racism. But no one has one darn plan of what to do next. Give us the next step. What are we doing to strengthen communities? 
People are getting frustrated with all this racism talk because it has become, for many, the goal: talk about racism. What next?

LP... you are fighting racism by being racist.  Stop it.

John Crawford has had its day in court.  I understand you don't trust your justice system.  I come from the Philippines where justice is barely existent.  I have a lot of trust in the American Justice System (love the quote from that movie The Judge - something like, you put 12 ordinary people together, you present them facts, and 9 times out of 10 they get it right).
But, regardless of whether you agree with the verdict or not, there is something you can get out of the entire process... the facts of the case.
People don't just call cops because a black man bought a BB gun.  People call the cops when any man brandishes about a BB gun.  Cops don't just go into a Walmart and start shooting without provocation.  They give out instructions. 
Did John Crawford DESERVE to be killed?  Of course not.  But, what one deserves is only part of a court case.  Actions go with justifications.  Attitude counts.  Crawford WAS brandishing the BB.  The BB is easily mistaken to be the Real Thing.  Crawford DID NOT follow police instructions.  He got shot.
That's the case.  Judge it as you will but this is not about the 2nd amendment.  This is about responsible behavior in public and respect for authority as well as job competence.
 

2nd amendment rights are not the issue here. Gun safety and knowledge of how to handle a weapon around police officers is the issue. You don't EVER reach for your real of fake gun when apprehended by police. You tell them where the weapon is, keep your hands on your head, and let them confiscate the weapon. 

In the case of Castille, the wife claimed that he was not reaching for his weapon, he was reaching for his driver's license.