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    Dallas, Texas
  • Interests
    Helping marriages and relationships through The Marriage Boot Camp
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  1. Thanks for your input. I'll take it into consideration.
  2. Great point, I'll add it in.
  3. Thanks MrShorty for the information and links. I'll start looking into those.
  4. I'm not here to debate whether a discussion of this nature belongs in church, I know this can be argued both ways. What I am asking for though is questions regarding sex & intimacy and you brought up a great one. "What does my spouse want?" We find many couples have communication issues and as basic of a question as that is, most times it's not being asked of their spouse. Which I tend to lean towards being part of the issue of a sexless marriage because their needs are not getting met the way they want them fulfilled, in turn not being communicated. It just ends up being routine. This seems to get compounded when a couple is approaching or reached being empty nesters. Especially if a couple hasn't somewhat mastered the communication aspect and spending quality time together before reaching this stage of life. Thanks Anatess2!
  5. We will not be getting into the how to's of sex in class, all couples attending already have kids. It would seem they have that part figured out and would be a waste of class time. ;.) This is more about dealing with a sexless marriage, or maybe how to come to an agreement on frequency with a spouse or discuss better intimacy with their spouse. Class instruction & discussion for example would be how to work through discussing these topics with their spouse in general. It's left up to the couples to discuss the details of how to and what goes. The couples attending seem to really like this format, we hold a class once a month for the last five months. The reason I mentioned unbiased input is I suspect no one on this forum is attending the class.
  6. Looking for input from the forum from both men & women (over the age of 18 and preferably married or been married). Little background, my wife and I are members and have been involved with a marriage seminar for the last 15 years, so we are well versed in dealing with marriage and relationship issues. Our Bishop has approached us about teaching a marriage class that is outside the normal information the church has released (Strengthening Marriage, Strengthening Marriage & Family). He is wanting us to put together a class that teaches real tools and information that help couples with communication, conflict resolution, forgiveness, sex & intimacy etc. Class has started and going very well but we are needing some unbiased LDS input. One of the things we want to discuss in class is sex & intimacy. We have some ideas but want to see if were on track. From an LDS standpoint, what questions would you want answered or information would you want to learn about with your spouse in this class regarding sex & intimacy to improve your relationship?
  7. Why does your husband have a problem with the church? There would appear to be a more deeper rooted issue happening than just his opinion of Uchtdorf that would cause him to turn away from the church like this that hasn't been mentioned if I'm following everything.
  8. I do agree with others about taking on some of the responsibility of how your relationship got to where it is now. At this point, is your wife willing to continue to work to save the marriage or has she already checked out? It can't be all one sided to repair the damage that has been done. From what you have stated, sounds like you are not fulfilling something in the marriage that she needs, wants and desires hence why she might be looking elsewhere to get her needs met. I'm not condoning what she's doing just stating why she might be looking outside the marriage. Figure out what these needs, wants and/or desires are and start fulfilling them to the best of your ability. This is a great place to start working to save your marriage. This is also what couples with great relationships do, make sure each other's needs, wants & desires are met. I'll throw this out there too. Trust in the relationship would have been lost long before you found the snap chat thread. Just a question for you that you don't have to reply with an answer, just food for thought. What broke the trust in your relationship earlier on? Figure out what that is and start working through it.
  9. This sounds like the issues within the relationship you have with your husband have now turned to resentment for him and other family members, hence the jealousy. Understandably, if this is his repeated cycle it would be hard to avoid the resentment. Going back to the original issue, you mentioned he is generally an angry person. Why is he angry? My guess is there is more to this than you may know. It maybe something from his childhood that he has carried forward and has never discussed or let go. Until he finds forgiveness and drops his walls for whatever transpired we will continue this path. You can’t control how he feels, you can only control how you feel and deal with the situation. At some point you will need to forgive him for the resentment that he has caused you and the family but this will be extremely hard while still living it. I’m not saying either that he couldn’t have a real mental issue but the examples you describe of him would indicate him holding on to anger, bitterness and resentment resulting in unforgiveness that has been left to grow and fester in his life effecting everyone around him. Again, you can’t control him or his feelings. You can only control you and how you feel. The sooner he decides to do something about his past issues, the sooner you both can start growing and have a nurturing love for one another. Seeing a doctor about a mental issue and him getting put on meds for it will only Band-Aid the situation for a short time until he deals with the core issue behind the anger.
  10. I'm only hearing one side of the story but it sounds like from your side that both of you are not getting your needs and wants met in the relationship and not showing love to the other the way they want to receive it. This is called love language. Please let me know if I'm totally off base.