One Step

First off, we should all understand that everyone has different opinions on how the Garment affects their life. For some, it's no big deal but for others, it's quite unpleasant. That's why it often comes up so often in these forums. Unfortunately, the Church rarely addresses these concerns directly so it's mainly up to the members/community to reconcile these kinds of questions. But pertaining to the original question, sometimes I find the language of the TR question to be a bit strange "Do you wear the garment both night and day as instructed in the endowment and in accordance with the covenant you made in the temple?" Maybe it's semantics but that question makes it sound like we're told to wear them night and day during the endowment but we're not. We're just told to wear them throughout our lives. And sure we make lots of covenants at the temple, but in the TR question, "covenant" is singular which implies that we made a specific one regarding the Garment in the temple so I can see why people struggle to remember what or when that one is/was. And then on top of that, it feels like we get most of our instruction outside of the temple. We get told how to dispose of them, specific counsel regarding yard work, the 4 S's, etc. So yes, sometimes the whole reasoning behind the Garment and its host of rules can be an obstacle. And for some it's a difficult obstacle because it's a daily/hourly/by-the-minute commitment. For me, I take it to be a challenge to test my willingness to be obedient. I do hope that someday the challenge will be over, whether the Church changes its policy or my mind is eased with understanding.

It may not be the popular opinion but I believe what the OP Macaroon says has merit. She says she feels "frumpy and ugly" when wearing garments and many have stated that what she wears should have no bearing on how she feels. Well, we teach that "Your dress and grooming influence the way you and others act." -FTSOY It's very realistic that she acts differently when she wears garments. Less likely to flirt, less likely to try to catch her husband's attention. Let's not pretend that we don't dress differently on a special date than when we go to Grandma's home. We want to feel different and have our spouse view us differently, so we go through the effort. And as for her husband, it would definitely be common for how he acts to fluctuate depending on what she's wearing. And how we treat others and how we are treated definitely have an effect on how we feel. Sure others may live differently, but this could be her reality so why belittle her for it. So Macaroon, I wish I had a solution. I definitely feel for you. My wife has always dressed in a way the Church approves of. Yet, since she's worn garments, I definitely notice that I feel and act differently towards her and they are not changes that I like. But what can be done? Sometimes I take a deep breath and tell myself to relax.

I wanted to show a little love to the Original Poster. I love the temple and I love everything that it represents. I'd like to think of her post as similar to a marriage relationship. One can love a spouse and still voice an opinion if there is something that bothers her. Love does not always mean suffering in silence. I have difficulties understanding why the Lord put such emphasis on what is basically underwear and strange, expensive and uncomfortable underwear at that. I have a hard time with the Church's stance that it "stays out of the bedroom issues" when the garments are a shield and a protection from our (maybe not others) sexual intimacy. And it's tough, most of the answers seem to be try harder to get a testimony of them and everything will work out. Faith to act is given in varying degrees for various issues (I doubt many could sacrifice like Abraham) and garments may be a near-breaking point for some. The good news is that often times, the Church changes. I imagine that people were uncomfortable with one-piece garments for some time before the Church made the change and I have hope that someday the Church will update its expectations (they weren't always worn 24/7) for members. Then again, it may never change and this will be an uncomfortable cross to bear.