Ironhold

Members
  • Content Count

    1044
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    1

Reputation Activity

  1. Like
    Ironhold reacted to laronius in Men's hearts failing them   
    @Ironhold I'm not even going to try to empathize with what you are dealing with. It seems like some people get more than their share of trials in this life. I have a friend who has had to deal with major loss and disappointment over and over again during his life and yet he keeps on going and another who seems to get diagnosed with a different kind of cancer every couple of years and yet doesn't slow down in pursuing life. I think you would belong in this category of people I'm inspired by and of whom i say I'm glad it's not me because I don't know how I'd handle it. Keep up the good fight and continue to put your trust in Him who does know exactly what you are dealing with.
  2. Sad
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Men's hearts failing them   
    Thanks. 
    The long and short of it is that when I was in junior high my maternal grandmother began the slide into Alzheimer's. 
    My parents spent so much time and energy trying to take care of her that I was pretty much an afterthought. They just assumed everything was fine and dandy with me unless they were forced to deal with something, and when that happened they usually did so with short tempers. I had trouble convincing them that I was having issues with my physical health (the scoliosis in my spine had so long to sit that not only did it warp my spine, it warped my hips and legs as well) and issues at school, let alone that I was having issues with my mental health. 
    I had to fight with them for several years before I finally got in to see a doctor who recognized that yes, there was something wrong with my back. By then I had reached a point to where physical therapy was almost completely out the window; short of alien cybernetics, the best I can hope for is extensive and invasive surgery and lengthy rehabilitation. Mom has accepted that she should have listened and that I'm dealing with the consequences, but dad is taking longer to convince. 
    I've also recently gotten them to understand that, mentally speaking, I was wired wrong to begin with and what I've lived through hasn't helped. They accept that I'm likely on the autism spectrum and that they missed the warning signs just like they didn't understand what I was trying to tell them about my back. But I'm having to also explain to them that I'm still dealing with severe bipolar because the strain of everything that happened overloaded my mind and that some days it takes all of my energy just to function. 
    I'm also trying to get them to understand that the triple play of "they had no time for me and often treated me like a nuisance when I needed their time", a toxic high school environment (it was so bad that one of the campus cops came to work with a hangover and subjected me to a rant about tequila), and "you didn't go on a mission so you're worthless" left a massive void inside that I've never been able to heal on my own. 
    My plan for this year, before everything went wrong, was to finally get in to see whatever doctors and mental health experts I could afford (my Obamacare eats so much of my paycheck I can't actually afford to see anyone under normal circumstances). The endgame was to get a full sum total of what I'm dealing with, and if needs be get an official certification listing a disability rating. I've sunk so much of my life into trying to save this town and gotten so little in return that it's the only way I can get the help I need to even *try* and get my life to a more normal existence (which, at 37, I highly doubt will ever happen; I've already given up on ever having a family of my own). 
  3. Like
    Ironhold reacted to LDSGator in Men's hearts failing them   
    We’re praying for you here my friend. Please stay strong. 
  4. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Men's hearts failing them   
    I'll be honest. 
    There were times I cried in the middle of the night because I was just that frustrated. 
    Since I'm with a newspaper, I'm an essential worker. My load doubled during COVID, both covering everything and making sure everyone got their newspapers. We were literally donating hundreds of newspapers to the city to give out with the meal assistance program to help keep the public informed. This is on top of being someone whose columns people read to be informed and entertained, as I had to walk on eggshells to find things that would keep people going. 
    I also had to deal with my parents (who didn't handle the lockdown well) and several others who ended up needing help as well. Yes, I had to try and talk someone out of a suicide attempt. 
    I was fried to a crisp, and am still having trouble getting back to normal. 
  5. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Men's hearts failing them   
    I'll be honest. 
    There were times I cried in the middle of the night because I was just that frustrated. 
    Since I'm with a newspaper, I'm an essential worker. My load doubled during COVID, both covering everything and making sure everyone got their newspapers. We were literally donating hundreds of newspapers to the city to give out with the meal assistance program to help keep the public informed. This is on top of being someone whose columns people read to be informed and entertained, as I had to walk on eggshells to find things that would keep people going. 
    I also had to deal with my parents (who didn't handle the lockdown well) and several others who ended up needing help as well. Yes, I had to try and talk someone out of a suicide attempt. 
    I was fried to a crisp, and am still having trouble getting back to normal. 
  6. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Men's hearts failing them   
    Everything from violent crimes to domestic abuse to substance abuse to mental health evaluations all shot up during 2020, beginning when the various governments started implementing the lockdown restrictions. Most people couldn't handle being confined to their homes for such an extended period, while those of us who were essential workers had massive amounts of stress and responsibility dumped on us. This is a big part of why Texas and other states were so quick to start lifting restrictions, as they knew we all needed to get back to normal ASAP. 
    The riots and looting that took place over the summer didn't help matters any, as it just got people even more worked up. And now that the lockdowns are eased, many companies are having trouble getting employees so that they can get going again. 
    It's to the point now that there are people asking if, in many jurisdictions, the lockdowns didn't do more harm than good. 
  7. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Men's hearts failing them   
    Everything from violent crimes to domestic abuse to substance abuse to mental health evaluations all shot up during 2020, beginning when the various governments started implementing the lockdown restrictions. Most people couldn't handle being confined to their homes for such an extended period, while those of us who were essential workers had massive amounts of stress and responsibility dumped on us. This is a big part of why Texas and other states were so quick to start lifting restrictions, as they knew we all needed to get back to normal ASAP. 
    The riots and looting that took place over the summer didn't help matters any, as it just got people even more worked up. And now that the lockdowns are eased, many companies are having trouble getting employees so that they can get going again. 
    It's to the point now that there are people asking if, in many jurisdictions, the lockdowns didn't do more harm than good. 
  8. Haha
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in How to annoy Doctor Who fans   
    At one point, a story was circulating claiming that "Monty Python's Flying Circus" was one of the shows purged despite it being in color, and that the only reason the show survived is because the head of a PBS station here in Texas (some versions of the story say Houston) liked the series so much that he refused to hand the broadcast masters back over. 
  9. Sad
    Ironhold got a reaction from Backroads in Honoring parents, leave and cleave, and single folk   
    Those here who know my story know that I'm single in large part because I chose to "honor my parents" at a critical juncture in my life, setting up some rather catastrophic and life-altering events for which I'm still dealing with the consequences. 
  10. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in How to annoy Doctor Who fans   
    It's far, far more complicated and depressing than that. 
    In the 1960s, the BBC and ITV both signed overly-generous contracts with their unions, which, among other things, limited the number of times any given episode of any given show could be rebroadcast in the UK. 
    As older shows from the 1950s and 1960s started to hit their broadcast limits, and color TV became the international standard, the executives at both companies found themselves with large quantities of older programs they couldn't air and feared couldn't license out elsewhere. Because of this, they made the conscious and voluntary decision to destroy the masters in order to make room in their physical archives. 
    Several entire shows were lost because of this, while others lost large swaths of their content. For example, the first season of "The Avengers" is gone barring three episodes. 
    In the case of Doctor Who, because the show had aired in so many markets the world over, they were able to recover usable audio recordings from among the large group of fans who had recorded the show off of television. 
    Recovering the video and the masters have been a far more complicated situation. 
    In some instances, footage was reused between episodes. This meant that all they had to do was copy the footage and they had at least that snippet of the given episode. 
    In other instances, material was found to have still been in the BBC archives. Several other BBC shows, like "Blue Peter", used bits and pieces of Who footage, including material that was otherwise lost. A few masters were found to have still been in the possession of the BBC itself, just misplaced and mis-cataloged in archives. 
    Many international broadcasters, including stations as far away as Australia, Nigeria, and Ethiopia, found broadcast masters in their archives that they'd acquired from the BBC and never returned. 
    From there, however, the tales get more sordid. 
    For example, when people found the broadcast masters from Australian TV, they discovered bits and pieces had been physically cut out to meet the demands of the nation's government TV censor. A search of the censor's archives revealed not only the missing pieces, but pieces removed from other episodes. 
    Or there's the fact that the church, yes, us, recovered three master reels. The BBC was selling off some buildings in the early 1990s, and the church bought one facility, IIRC an office complex. The BBC didn't properly clear it out, however, leaving several metal cabinets behind. The church officials responsible for the building were able to pop them open, and discovered the master reels while inventorying the content. 
    At least one master reel has turned up second-hand, an estate sale held by the adult grandchildren of a deceased BBC employee. The employee had taken several master reels of various shows with him on his way out the door, and his grandchildren didn't know what they were until a collector of rare media showed up. 
    Several episodes are still missing, in whole or in part, however, and so there have been efforts to reconstruct them. This includes having Cosgrove Hall produce animation meant to replicate what the live-action material would have been. 
  11. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Commercial Racism   
    MBA here. 
    The employee in question is a lawsuit waiting to happen. 
    It's cheaper to fire an employee with a documented history of racist behavior than to handle the lawsuits caused by their actions. 
    You'd actually be doing corporate a favor. 
  12. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Commercial Racism   
    MBA here. 
    The employee in question is a lawsuit waiting to happen. 
    It's cheaper to fire an employee with a documented history of racist behavior than to handle the lawsuits caused by their actions. 
    You'd actually be doing corporate a favor. 
  13. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Commercial Racism   
    MBA here. 
    The employee in question is a lawsuit waiting to happen. 
    It's cheaper to fire an employee with a documented history of racist behavior than to handle the lawsuits caused by their actions. 
    You'd actually be doing corporate a favor. 
  14. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeuroTypical in Commercial Racism   
    MBA here. 
    The employee in question is a lawsuit waiting to happen. 
    It's cheaper to fire an employee with a documented history of racist behavior than to handle the lawsuits caused by their actions. 
    You'd actually be doing corporate a favor. 
  15. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from dprh in Depression - What are we to do?   
    During one of his many reflections on his time in the military, comic book industry figure Richard C. Meyer made the following observation: 
    "It's not the bad soldiers you really need to worry about; it's the good soldiers who start sliding into being bad soldiers". 
    What he learned from hard experience is that if these good soldiers start to come apart, it's a sign that their personal life is coming apart and that it's robbing them of the energy and focus they used to put into doing their job. Simply punishing them as if they were bad soldiers would only make matters worse, as it'd add to whatever the issue is. Rather, the better course of action was to sit down with them, have a talk, and find what the root cause of the issue was. That allows for a better determination of what's going on. 
    For example, many business owners try to take advantage of younger soldiers by tricking them into bad contracts, usurious interest rates, and the like. If a soldier is distracted by their financial woes, they're not going to be at their best. This may require a talk with an on-base attorney or a financial counselor to sort out. Yes, some military bases actually do keep record of companies that mess over their soldiers and spread the word to avoid them. 
    In the situation you're talking about, something has led to her feeling that she's worthless, which is leading her to slide into apathy and generally not taking care of herself, which is leading to the social outcast status that's reinforcing her feelings of worthlessness. Her desperate efforts to get attention suggest that she's being starved for attention she should be getting elsewhere, such as from her family or her local social circle. She's down low, wants someone to acknowledge the good in her, and that's not happening. 
    What she likely needs is a friend, someone who she can talk with and who can gently inspire her to be a better person. 
    Telling her to "just get over herself" is simply going to send the message that she's at fault for every little thing that's going wrong with her life, even if it's something she has no control over, like emotionally distant family or bullying from peers. 
  16. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from dprh in Depression - What are we to do?   
    During one of his many reflections on his time in the military, comic book industry figure Richard C. Meyer made the following observation: 
    "It's not the bad soldiers you really need to worry about; it's the good soldiers who start sliding into being bad soldiers". 
    What he learned from hard experience is that if these good soldiers start to come apart, it's a sign that their personal life is coming apart and that it's robbing them of the energy and focus they used to put into doing their job. Simply punishing them as if they were bad soldiers would only make matters worse, as it'd add to whatever the issue is. Rather, the better course of action was to sit down with them, have a talk, and find what the root cause of the issue was. That allows for a better determination of what's going on. 
    For example, many business owners try to take advantage of younger soldiers by tricking them into bad contracts, usurious interest rates, and the like. If a soldier is distracted by their financial woes, they're not going to be at their best. This may require a talk with an on-base attorney or a financial counselor to sort out. Yes, some military bases actually do keep record of companies that mess over their soldiers and spread the word to avoid them. 
    In the situation you're talking about, something has led to her feeling that she's worthless, which is leading her to slide into apathy and generally not taking care of herself, which is leading to the social outcast status that's reinforcing her feelings of worthlessness. Her desperate efforts to get attention suggest that she's being starved for attention she should be getting elsewhere, such as from her family or her local social circle. She's down low, wants someone to acknowledge the good in her, and that's not happening. 
    What she likely needs is a friend, someone who she can talk with and who can gently inspire her to be a better person. 
    Telling her to "just get over herself" is simply going to send the message that she's at fault for every little thing that's going wrong with her life, even if it's something she has no control over, like emotionally distant family or bullying from peers. 
  17. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Jane_Doe in Depression - What are we to do?   
    An extreme failure to process social cues can be a sign of various issues, everything from "on the autism spectrum" to "raised in an environment where they never got to properly socialize with others". 
    If she has both going for her, then it's going to be extra hard. 
  18. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Jane_Doe in Depression - What are we to do?   
    An extreme failure to process social cues can be a sign of various issues, everything from "on the autism spectrum" to "raised in an environment where they never got to properly socialize with others". 
    If she has both going for her, then it's going to be extra hard. 
  19. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Jane_Doe in Depression - What are we to do?   
    An extreme failure to process social cues can be a sign of various issues, everything from "on the autism spectrum" to "raised in an environment where they never got to properly socialize with others". 
    If she has both going for her, then it's going to be extra hard. 
  20. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Carborendum in mass shootings   
    I've been researching mass shooting incidents in the US for decades now. 
    What I keep finding is that in the vast majority of cases, not only was the shooter mentally ill, there were warning signs that were ignored. 
    Bell Tower Sniper? He himself wrote in his journal that something was wrong with him, but he refused to get help. Turns out he had a massive brain tumor.
    "I Don't Like Mondays"? She was disturbed and possibly on illegal drugs. No one noticed. 
    Columbine? The kids were being treated by a mental health expert who prescribed them medication that was *not* approved for use in minors due to... risk of psychotic episodes. Couple this with the parents not paying attention even as the kids were building *bombs* at home, and the inevitable happened. 
    And so on, and so on, and so on. 
    There was a warning sign at some point, but it got ignored. 
    The guy here in Texas who shot up a church to get back at his ex-wife? He was dishonorably discharged from the military for domestic violence. The military was supposed to have reported this to the FBI, but they never did and so his name never went on the official registry; this is why he was able to get the weapon he got. 
    It's as much about people not acting on what was right in front of them as it is about the weapons themselves. 
  21. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Carborendum in mass shootings   
    I've been researching mass shooting incidents in the US for decades now. 
    What I keep finding is that in the vast majority of cases, not only was the shooter mentally ill, there were warning signs that were ignored. 
    Bell Tower Sniper? He himself wrote in his journal that something was wrong with him, but he refused to get help. Turns out he had a massive brain tumor.
    "I Don't Like Mondays"? She was disturbed and possibly on illegal drugs. No one noticed. 
    Columbine? The kids were being treated by a mental health expert who prescribed them medication that was *not* approved for use in minors due to... risk of psychotic episodes. Couple this with the parents not paying attention even as the kids were building *bombs* at home, and the inevitable happened. 
    And so on, and so on, and so on. 
    There was a warning sign at some point, but it got ignored. 
    The guy here in Texas who shot up a church to get back at his ex-wife? He was dishonorably discharged from the military for domestic violence. The military was supposed to have reported this to the FBI, but they never did and so his name never went on the official registry; this is why he was able to get the weapon he got. 
    It's as much about people not acting on what was right in front of them as it is about the weapons themselves. 
  22. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Backroads in Child support/ temple recommend   
    If memory serves, church policy does indeed require that people be current on child support. So yes, bring this up to your bishop if you can prove it. 
  23. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from JohnsonJones in Non-Traditional "Missions"   
    As I've noted before, at the time I turned 18 there were some serious issues going on with my family to where my attempting to go on a formal mission would have been a hardship on my parents. 
    Instead, I spent the next decade getting laid into by local and stake priesthood leaders and even largely shunned by many local members. This is because at the time, the mantra was "all young men must serve missions, and all young women are to only date returned missionaries". I was in defiance of this mantra, and so there were consequences. 
    When I was in high school, most leaders were of the opinion that outside of e-mail and the barely-functional church website, the internet was literally nothing but porn. What they didn't understand was that this kind of mentality was keeping members off of the internet at a time when members online were few and far between. As such, those of us who were online were often the only member on any given internet forum. 20 - 1 odds in a "discussion" were depressingly normal, and this made critics of the church so brazen in displaying their overt hatred that "getting your first death threat" was a rite of passage. 
    Talking to hundreds of people at once from all over the world? Being the personal bogeyman of an entire counter-cult ministry? Getting a writer for an alt-media platform to knuckle under with a single carefully-worded e-mail showing at length how badly out of date his research was? Didn't mean anything to the folks who thought that a mission involved a name tag and a bike.
    Then once the Bloggernacle somehow just "magically appeared out of thin air", suddenly the internet was a glorious place to be and a ready tool for missionary work. Forgotten were the people like myself who drew the lines in the sand and built the defensive fortifications that allowed it to thrive in the first place. 
    Folks, you don't need a name tag to go on a mission. You being a member of the church means you're on a mission, and that mission is to be out there in the world as best as you can be. 
    And even if it looks like you're not having any success, you could be laying the groundwork for more than you'll ever know. 
  24. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from NeedleinA in Current Event - Stairs strike back   
    For the record, when I was younger I had a hard time convincing my parents that the odd pains I was feeling, especially in my back, were more than just the normal "growing pains". By the time I was an adult and able to get enough money together to go see a doctor, the "odd pains" had turned into scoliosis so bad that it had led to my hips and legs being warped to compensate. 
    In addition to being in near-constant pain (it'd take multiple rounds of surgery and months of therapy to correct, as one leg is actually longer than the other), I also have a bit of trouble with steps and can potentially stumble if I'm not holding onto a railing or something similar. 
    So I can understand Trump going for the railing or asking for a bit of help getting up and down if he's likewise got back or knee issues. 
    But for Biden to just stumble like that, even when attempting to grab the railing, raises very unfortunate questions about his ability to move. 
  25. Like
    Ironhold got a reaction from Carborendum in So... Easter   
    For those who don't know, I'm the entertainment writer for a series of local newspapers. I do two columns a week, an op/ed and a movie review (et al). 
    When it comes to certain major holidays, I try to find ways to mark them. 
    In the case of Easter, I try to have both a column marking the day and a review of a faith-based movie (even if it's an older one). 
    For the latter, I've got that sorted. Mom wanted to watch "The Cokeville Miracle" some time back, so done and done. 
    But for the former...
    2020 nearly destroyed me for how I had to parent my parents through the crisis as well as helping pretty much the entire town out. 2021 isn't much better, with a lot of personal issues hitting me as well as the disaster here in Texas. As much as I want to be grateful for what I do have and what I've been able to make it to, I'm just so badly drained from a solid year of drama that I'm having trouble putting thought to paper. 
    Anyone else not entirely feeling the Easter spirit this year?