TilKingdomCome

Now I'm even more confused than when I started this thread @SpiritDragon Couldn't help but notice your awesome avatar, and it reminded me: where do we get Choose the Right rings? The missionaries told me about that a few days ago - about how it's basically the Mormon emblem

But we play it just for fun, not as a courting ritual... UPDATE The Sunday before last I got the Aaronic Priesthood. Also, two of the missionaries left that weekend. The missionary I mentioned previously didn't leave, and neither did one of the others, but everyone else did. The two who remained got two new companions. Since then, I've been having a lot of doubt concerning the church. I know that a lot of the church is true but I don't agree with the church's view on celibate gay relationships. I understand why sexual gay relationships are a sin (waste of seed, lust of the flesh etc) but celibate gay relationships don't have that problem. If you want to suggest that those relationships are sinful because people should be getting into heterosexual relationships and bearing kids, I believe that gay couples should be allowed to foster/adopt kids who otherwise wouldn't have families. That way ALL of God's children are given families: the majority will have their heterosexual birth parents, but those who don't have that will be adopted/fostered. And no, I don't agree with surrogacy. Another thing that I've been having doubts about is the secrecy concerning the temple rituals. I've talked to various ex-Mormons online who said about how these rituals are like cult ceremonies, with stuff like slitting of the throat or someone acting as Satan. While I'm sure a lot of that is scaremongering to get people away from the church, when the missionaries and other church members refuse to clarify what actually happens in the temple, it means I only know of the bad stuff that's said to happen there. The reason the missionaries give for this secrecy is because temples are "sacred" but I'm not sure if I agree with this secrecy - don't people have the right to know what they're signing up for?? I didn't go to church last Sunday, because I was sick (the doctor says I might have colon cancer - not exactly a blessing one would expect immediately after baptism...) and I won't be going this Sunday either. This is for various reasons (1) I'm badly sun-burnt at the moment, because the weather here has been extremely hot, even though this country usually has a colder/rainy climate. My skin has started peeling because of it, so I want to limit the amount of time I spend away from home as much as possible until I recover (2) I've been having the aforementioned doubts. I want to spend some days away from church people so that I can make up my own mind whether this is a path I want to pursue or not, instead of being influenced by other people's opinions. Likewise, I'm avoiding talking to anyone who says negative stuff about the church, like ex-Mormons or my LGBT friends. I'm still reading scripture and praying a lot, so the only ones who'll influence my decision are me and God. (3) I still have a crush on that person. It's not as severe as it once was but I think it's good not to spend the Sabbath Day around him. As you've probably experienced, when you have a crush on someone, it can be quite distracting, and I don't want that distraction on the Sabbath, when I'm supposed to be devoting all my time to God. Instead I'll spend the day praying and reading scripture. That said, I am meeting with the branch president again today. I will explain to him my doubts and worries and I will mention my crush, something I didn't mention last time I met him. I won't say who it is, but I will explain about how it's something that's serving as a distraction. When I confess it, it should make it easier to move on from the crush. I spoke to my counselor yesterday, and told her about the crush, and it did help decrease the burden by just speaking to someone about it. So in other words, I got the Aaronic Priesthood two weeks ago from this Sunday but ever since then I haven't gone to church/fulfilled my duties. I hope to solve my problems and be ready to serve properly by next Sunday.

So I met with the branch president two Sundays ago, and explained about how I had continued my relationship with my bf after my baptism, but had now ended it. The president said it was okay, as long as I didn't do it again, and I was able to receive the Aaronic Priesthood the same day. Two questions: (1) Because I've been refraining from m*turbation since baptism, I've found myself having some dreams involving homosexual stuff. Because I can't control what happens in my dreams, I'm guessing that this is okay? (2) If me and my friends are playing the game spin the bottle, and it lands on another guy, am I able to kiss him or must I pass?

As a recent convert, with no friends/family in the church and with massive social anxiety, I can understand somewhat what you're feeling - it's sort of that "fish out of water" feeling. However, there's always bound to be at least some nice people, who are willing to let you sit with them during church and who are happy to talk to you, so find those people and enjoy their company. And remember, the main reason why you're at church is for God - to feel closer to God and Jesus. So as long as you go to church, partake of the sacrament and read your scripture, that's all that really matters. I know it's difficult but don't leave your feelings of isolation hinder your church-going experience

They actually said to search the internet for many of the questions I had (eg the fate of Sariah, who basically disappeared after the first book of Nephi), which surprised me as well - I thought missionaries were supposed to discourage searching the internet, in case I came across people who wanted to disrupt the church (eg ex-mormons) Do you have any sources where modern prophets suggest the wedding in Cana is Jesus' one? The rules don't apply to Him? But surely He's supposed to have led by example. We're supposed to follow His example. Also, inb4 Mary Magdalene: I'm aware that there are various theories suggesting that Jesus had a significant other. Some suggest Simon the Beloved was Jesus' literal beloved while a lot more people suggest that Jesus had a romance with Mary Magdalene, and fathered a bloodline. However, I don't think the Church has officially stated that any of this is true.

I'm a recent Mormon convert. I'm open to the possibility of going on a mission, if I gain a greater understanding and testimony of the Church, as I've found the missionaries very helpful and I'd like to offer the same support to other people. Get more people interested in the church. Unfortunately, I'm 21 and currently unemployed. The cut-off point for going on a mission is age 23, so I'm going to have to save up my money between now and then. What prices are involved in going on a mission? 1. Travel expenses (eg the plane from area-to-area) 2. Do I pay rent for the place me and my companion stay in 3. How much food do I need? I usually only eat one meal a day, which only costs me 2 euro, and I'll probably be invited to some church member's houses from time to time for dinner, so I'm guessing I won't need much money for food? 4. Do I get to buy some stuff for myself, while on a mission (eg new clothes, books etc)? 5. Do I pay tithing while on a mission? 6. Do I have access to my bank account while on mission or do I need to have all the money gathered beforehand? 7. Are there any fees I have to pay up-front to register as a missionary? 8. Are there any other expenses that I haven't factored in? Basically I'm trying to figure out how much it would cost me. I use euros btw.

Hey So this is a question I posed to the missionaries in my most recent lesson, and they said I should just ask online to look for an answer. The Church places a lot of importance on marriage, and having kids. It's considered a part of the Plan of Salvation. But the Church also says that it's important to live like Christ and that, by being baptised, you agree to follow Christ's example. Yet Christ never got married. If marriage is so important, and if we're meant to live like Christ, why didn't He get married or have kids? Is that a sign that marriage/family isn't as important as the Church says it is?

Okay. Maybe I won't tell him, if feelings aren't sinful. I might mention that, although I'm willing to live a homosexual-free lifestyle, I'll still get crushes, but I won't act on them. I think it might be easier to get rid of my guilt if I tell him that, but I won't go into more detail than that or say who it is that I have a crush on. Unfortunately, you're right. He doesn't seem to be okay with no sex, even if he said he is. And yes, him groping me like that was completely inappropiate. I felt awful afterwards, because I've been doing my best to live to the law of chastity and one thing I learnt in my lessons with the Elders on that subject is that it;s a sin to touch someone in their private parts if you're not married to them, even if it's touching them above the clothes and not the actual flesh. It's a sin between a male and a female; it's a double-sin between a male and a male. I messaged him this morning, saying that we need to talk, and I am thinking of dumping him. It's not going to be easy but (a) we both want different things out of the relationship and (b) as I said in an earlier comment, one of the main reasons I'm still with him is because it's distracting me from thinking about my crush. That's pretty unfair to him tbh

Okay. Thank you, and you gave me a lot to think on. I find it handier to actually write out my thoughts, and see what people's advice on them is - sorry if the last comment was way too much detail. Do you think I should tell the branch president about the crush on the Elder? Like, how likely is it that he'll suggest the Elder's transfer? And, if he does suggest a transfer, do they have to tell the Elder the reason for it? I don't want him to remember me as "that guy who caused me to have to move cities again", especially when he actually told me that he hates moving around, and would much prefer to stay in the one area for as long as possible.

UPDATE On Wednesday, I had the movie night with the church. I wore the jacket, and they didn't say anything about it, which is a good sign. Today, I texted the Elders to say that I had a date with my bf (I had to explain why I wasn't going to be able to attend the church volleyball) I told them that it was a celibate relationship, so I'm not sinning. They said "It isn't about celibacy, it's about actions" What does that mean? They're saying I should tell the branch president tomorrow (before I get the Preparatory Priesthood on Sunday) but it's honestly something I don't want to discuss with him. Basically, me and my bf were together (in a slightly intimate way) before I began investigating the church, but ever since learning about the Church and how God doesn't want two guys to have sex, me and my bf have agreed to remain celibate. So, I'm not sinning, am I? And no, we're not "playing house" -as someone said in an earlier comment-we're just two guys really enjoying one another's company.

I'm sorry but the wearing of temple garments is a sacred previlige, that you should feel honoured to be able to wear. Not every Mormon gets to wear them - those Mormons who aren't "temple-worthy", those Mormons who've just joined the LDS Church etc. And there are plenty of clothes you can wear over them, if you feel that they're somehow unfashionable. When you got baptised, you took the name of Jesus on yourself and agreed to follow His commandments. Wearing temple garments is one step even greater than that - you literally get to wear this item of sacredness. Surely that should be considered a good thing?

Thanks. I'll check those links (I've already read the JoshWeed one, because of another question I had a few weeks ago. And I'll let you know how things are going. As I said, I'm probably going to wear my girl's jacket to the church movie night tomorrow, and if I can convince him, I'm going to get one of my ex-boyfriends to come with me as a friend (we're no longer dating, but we're still friends), so hopefully the Church will be okay with that

Hi. I was baptised into the LDS Church last Saturday, and I have some questions about some of its teachings. Homosexuality I know that the LDS Church views s*x between two members of the same gender a sin, because it's wasting seed etc. But is it ok to be in a completely celibate homosexual relationship? Cross-dressing I haven't seen any scripture concerning this, and it's something I'm too afraid to ask the missionaries/the bishop about, but what is the Church's view on cross-dressing? By this, I mean that sometimes I wear jackets and shirts that are intended for women. I don't wear dresses and stuff but I wear jackets, as I'm pretty genderfluid. What is the Church's stance on this? Is it a sin or not? Is it a sin to wear nail-varnish/eyeliner? I'm going to a church movie night tomorrow and I really want to wear my favourite jacket to it, which is traditionally a woman's jacket. What's the likelihood of me being ridiculed/shunned for it? Baptism Number Also, wasn't I supposed to have gotten some type of church membership number after my baptism? I haven't gotten that...

MY FIRST CONFESSION I broke the commandment of no alcohol. I'm being baptised this Saturday so today, after the cinema, I had two glasses of alcoholic cider. Funny thing is, I barely ever drank before (the last time I had alcohol before today was during Halloween week) but I just needed to get it out of my system - my last ever drink, seeing as I'll have to be sober after I get baptised. MY SECOND CONFESSION I live near the LDS Church, so the bus I get to/from town is the same bus the missionaries get to/from the church. Also, my city is a fairly small city. So whenever I go into the city to hang out with my mates, I end up seeing the missionaries walking around the street trying to preach the word of God. And I always try my best to avoid them. I don't know why but I just feel really bad about seeing them around the place when we don't have meetings - like I'm intruding on their time or something. Does anyone else ever feel like this?

I love how he's about to say "In Jesus' name", then he realises his mistake only to mistake again by saying "Amen". Thanks for sharing :3

Thank you. I had a very interesting conversation with the missionaries today - where I discussed my concerns about the gay stuff (NOT the crush! As others have pointed out, that was probably my confused feelings because the person was bringing me the Word of God, which in turn brought me a lot of happiness) - and they seemed very nice and mature about it. They also mentioned about how, while I'll lose lgbt friends, I WON'T lose friendships from the church YJacket, that is a LOT of stuff in your post. I'll reply to various paragraphs by inserting text in bold into the quote-box.

Hi. First off, I'm delighted that your depression is getting better and you're finding happiness. I can completely understand why you might use pornography as a way to escape from your stress but - if you don't mind me asking - was it the content of the videos themself that helped allievate your stress or was it the fact that you were ma*turbating. The latter is a way a lot of people use to escape stress. If it was the former, did you feel lust towards the people in those videos? Did you feel like they were somehow more desirable than your wife? If you didn't feel lust to them, then she should find it easy to forgive you as she knows that it was just a way to survive your stress. If you did feel lust, then unfortunately she might be angry but still I suggest you tell her, and show that you've repented and that you're sorry if it upset her. It's better to get it over with now, instead of bottling it up for ages and keeping the guilt locked up inside of you. We're all human, we all make mistakes and honestly, the best thing we can do in that situation is be honest about it.

I was at a trans* support group a while ago - wherein I explained about my baptism and how, while it doesn't change my feelings on gender stuff, it does mean that I'm not going to transition because it's not what God wants. I've been going to that group for around a year now and it's always fun. But today, when I was leaving, I was saying goodbye to one of the people in the group and I actually held out my arm to shake his hand. He looked at me like "WTFudge?" I've never shaken hands with my friends like that before - it's not something anyone really does in Ireland - but because I'm now so used to doing it every time I meet a church member/missionary, it's become a habit! Do any of you have similar stories, where you do something that's only ever done among fellow church members, but you do it with a non-church member? How did they react?

I'd hazard a guess and say that it's the Oedipus Complex, but I thought that only happened with maternal figures, not with guys who are the same age as you? But ye may be right - I might be getting confused because of the gratitude I have for finding the spirit. I've purposely avoided speaking to this missionary except when necessary, and didn't speak to him at all during Church yesterday, and it is helping me move past it. Another, somewhat-related question (if this is better suited to a seperate thread, lemme know): I'm having my baptism this weekend. However over the last few days - and, I expect, over the next few days between now and the day of the baptism itself - I've been feeling very scared about the baptism. Being baptised is a very big decision to make, and by agreeing to be baptised - by agreeing to keep the Lord's commandments - it means that my life, and the plans I had for my future, will completely change. Up til now, all of my friends have been members of the LGBT community. I've purposely kept to those social circles because I felt safer there, I could be myself around those people. But, now that I'm joining a church that considers those people sinners, my friends have basically abandoned me. They don't want anything to do with someone who's an active member of a community that discriminates against them. I only have one friend left who I still talk to, and even then there's an awkwardness whenever we meet up. I know she thinks of it as a betrayal, especially since she in particular offered me a lot of support when I was struggling with LGBT stuff in the past. Basically I'm losing all of my friends, so that I can join this church. And someone I've spoken to online - who used to be a member of the church before losing faith in it - said that the moment you leave the baptism waters, everyone in the church suddenly turns a lot colder to you. They "love-bomb" you before you get baptised, making it seem like a nice community you're joining, but then after you're baptised, they want nothing to do with you. They just keep to their own already-established cliques and, because you weren't raised in the church and know nobody else there, you're left feeling like an outsider. If I get baptised, I'm losing my friends and I'm going to enter a community where I'm alone. Also, a large part of my plan for the future was to find a nice guy and to settle down and have kids. I can't do that anymore. I was speaking to one of the older Brothers during a car-ride to a stake meeting on Saturday and he said that all types of homosexual relationships, even celibate ones, are sinful and unnatural. Which means that I'll never be able to find true love or happiness if I join the Church. I'll be closer to God - which is definitely a great thing - but still I won't have any companionship. It's an awful lot to give up and yet, I can't exactly turn my back on the Church either, seeing as I know that it's the true church. What would ye suggest for someone in my situation?

I'm getting baptised soon. Unfortunately, I've developed something of a crush on one of the missionaries. We're both the same age - in our late teens - and he just happens to be particularly good-looking. I've tried to not let it distract me during our lessons together, and I generally try to talk to other missionaries and church members during church events like the weekly sports matches, I try to talk to other people instead of him so that my crush on him doesn't serve as a distraction. However, when we're talking - such as when he's trying to teach me stuff during the lessons - I find it very difficult to look at him or maintain eye contact. I know such crushes are unlawful but I can't get rid of it. Any advice on how to deal with it? One of the annoying things about it is that I am asexual - I feel absolutely no desire to have sex with anybody - but I still get crushes on people.