Emilyloo

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Everything posted by Emilyloo

  1. When we were dating/engaged/first married, he was a gamer in the sense it was a hobby with him. He'd play maybe 5-6 hours per week, liked to talk about the games, had a general interest in them. Then things went downhill and I can't pinpoint what happened to cause a change. So, I have been living with my aunt for a couple of weeks now. We have separate bank accounts so I have all my money. I feel so much better, less stressed, enjoying my kids more. I'm continuing to pray for my husband. He's called a few times, says he misses us, wonders how he'll make rent. His parents, however, are furious with me. They've been worried about his changes too, but now are worried he will become their responsibility. So there's that madness. Just wanted to give an update.
  2. Thank-you for your thoughts. So far... I have cancelled months ago the internet service as well as made rid of the computer, smart phones, and the gaming system. I have computer/net access as work, library, and friends/family homes. He has a network of family members and a few friends he goes to in order to play. They say he needs time, yet they only prevent him from sleeping at their homes. I have stopped preparing meals for him or doing his laundry. He went to a few sessions of therapy and then stopped. I can't afford to go for myself anymore, though my bishop is trying to find ways to finance this. We barely talk anymore. When we have discussed this, the earlier sessions were promises to stop. More recently it has been about how so many other men get to play video games, why can't he? Why should men have to be the providers? He says he likes the marriage this way, but says he hates me for getting rid of everything and not giving him a way to pay for more. He was always a gamer, but it went very bad about two years ago and I don't even know why. It's been a huge, draining mess and I admit that I emotionally checked out of the marriage a long time ago. I have been praying for my marriage, which is why I don't want to do anything as final as divorce. But other people in my situation I have talked with say that they do have to put the typical marriage life on the backburner and work on other stuff for a time. That's what I'm trying to do. If I'm going to be the sole support of my kids, so be it. When I do pray about moving in with my auntie, I have received an answer that my kids need to be the first priority at this time.
  3. To begin, my husband is a gaming addict, however you consider the term. I do have a support system specific to the gaming, but I'm trying to make some decisions from a LDS perspective. My husband hasn't worked in over a year, having quit his job in order to game. I work full time, take care of the house, childcare, everything. I don't make all that much, and my husband is incapable of caring for our kids. Last time he insisted he would watch them, he left our baby in the crib for over 8 hours while he gamed. I can't afford our rent, bills, and childcare costs anymore. I'm going back to school for more training. My great-aunt who lives near the school has offered to take us in for free while I go to school... but refuses to take my husband. I don't blame her. I long ago made the decision to not divorce at least as this time, but I'm seriously considering this physical separation of letting my husband deal with all the leftovers. The bills and rent are not in my name. My bishop says he can't officially recommend me leaving, but has offered other support. I guess I'm just nervous at officially making this change.