I recently just found out that my husband & eternal companion was cheating on me. We've been married for 3 years, have 2 beautiful children; a 2 year old daughter and a 1 year old son. We've been married for 3.5 years and sealed for almost 2 years.
We didn't marry in the temple because I was not yet a member. But after having my daughter and being 6 months pregnant with my son, my husband started his 'evil doings.'
He created a new facebook page for himself (we had a shared fb page) and started to add girls. After they accepted, he would instantly PM them with very flirtatious messages. This flirting business was ongoing for almost 18 months.
Just last month, he asked me if he could go to a social with his cousins. I said 'yes' because I trusted him and I trusted his cousins. At the social, was one of the married sisters who we had previously been in the same ward. This sister was much older than my husband by at least 20 years and had sons the same age as my husband. In fact, her sons were very close friends with my husband. That night, my husband and this sister began their sexual affair. From what I can gather, they only went to 1st & 2nd base. A couple of days later they met up again after my husband had finished work, at their 'usual spot' in the carpark of the local swimming pool. Again they went 1st & 2nd base. They met up again days later, doing the exact same things at the exact same spot.
My husband then went interstate just at the beginning of this month, for a sporting tournament he had asked me if he could go watch with his foster brother. Of course I didn't like the idea of him going, but my husband is not one to usually listen to me. So off he went interstate, leaving Friday night & returning Sunday night. My husband and his brother were supposed to be staying at a close friend of his (known each other for 7 years) but that was not the case. Two weeks before he left interstate, my husband met a young girl who lived in that city. They began to talk and flirt. Him telling her that things between us were 'complicated' and that we were no longer together and that he hardly sees the children because we've moved away. So he asked her if he could come stay there with her and she said yes. My husband had left me and the kids to go interstate where he was supposed to be watching a sports tournament but was instead having sexual relations and breaking word of wisdom. He returned home to me & the kids and acted as if everything was normal and for me, I thought everything was normal.
It wasn't until this past weekend, we were in bed; he was sleeping and I was preparing my lesson for church the next day. I looked at his phone and starting to go through this phone. I found the app 'snapchat' and thought 'why does he have snapchat? He didn't say anything about having it.' But what made me suspicious was that he had hidden the app with all the sports apps, thinking I'd never find it. I opened his snapchat account and found numerous messages between him and girls, but that's how I found out about the 'interstate chick.'
I immediately woke him up, demanding an explanation. He just looked at me puzzled and scared; scared because he had just been caught. I cried all night, pleading with Heavenly Father to take away my hurt & pain. In the morning, I continued my search on his phone; where I found the new fb & instagram accounts. This is where I learnt of the affair with the old married sister. I was ready to walk out on this marriage. I was ready to take my babies and never look back.
But after countless hours of council from my husbands parents & sister (who are very strong members) I finally stopped packing. I had decided to give him a second chance.
Am I doing the right thing? I'm a convert to the church and I know a temple sealing is something sacred and should not be 'cancelled' unless under certain circumstances.
My husband promised that he would change - try to be a better father, husband, priesthood holder. However I haven't seen any effort?
I've changed all the passwords to his social network and deactivated all accounts, including our shared page.
I can't help but think that I've made a huge mistake giving him a second chance.. I'm just trying to salvage whatever is left of my marriage?
From one very heartbroken wife..