mgridle

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Everything posted by mgridle

  1. I get some things are filter skipping but does rat's patootie count?
  2. That's a pretty good project-congrats to the boy. I hate the projects that basically amount to a book drive or a blood drive . . . big deal-that's simple and no real lasting impact.
  3. I know, I can never get things right in today's society of who is supposed to be the bad guy. Originally I thought men were the bad guys and we had to keep men and women separate b/c men would pray upon innocent young women (#metoo!), but then I thought women were so powerful and "strong" women that they can do anything and don't need a man's help (don't open the door for me), then I thought oh men and women are completely equal so a man can claim to be a woman compete in a woman's sport beat the snot out of the woman and it should be totally cool, then I thought well don't we have separate genders in sports to help women . . . I'm just all confused, silly me, I just need to "get with" whatever identity politics, group I'm supposed to hate that has too much privelege of the day.
  4. At least someone understands. The real split occurred when BSA allowed open homosexuals in-that was when the decision was really made. The PC crowd and maybe even the Church's PR department won't admit it. But that was the exact moment when this was destined to happen. It just took 4-5 years for the rest of the membership to actually want the Church to split from BSA.
  5. Agreed. Now b/c you introduce girls and women into the organization that means you will have women scoutmasters, you will have women in the leadership roles at the top of BSA, now woman's "issues" (whatever that means) will be taken into account. For example the backpacker merit badge requires a 50miler in a short amount of time. Eventually the requirements to be Eagle will be watered down and additional merit badges will be created to take into account girls interest. It will no longer be "scouting.
  6. This! It was the core of scouting. The leaders are there to guide, direct, provide inputs, encourage, set standards, but it was a "boy lead and run" program! Man, it taught so, so much. RIP BSA of old. . . .Unfortunately much of Utah culture went from develop character to let's make everyone a winner! BSA went from Character Counts in '97 at the National Jamboree to let's let in transgenders in 2017-twenty years man, that was it.
  7. No, you don't understand kids . . .I guess you think Adam had a funky relationship with God.
  8. To each his own; I never said to not hold them accountable at all-never suggested. I just said I wouldn't reveal my sources; kids are going to try and pull the wool over my eyes-just going to happen-and they need to know that it won't happen. How many times did you think you parents didn't know what you did and then find out 20 years later . . .oh they really did know-pretty common.
  9. Lol. You really don't have a clue. "Adam, Adam where are you?" "I hide myself b/c I was naked" (i.e. I did something I shouldn't have done and I ran away (I hide myself, I snuck away, etc.) b/c I didn't want to deal with the punishment). It's a tale as old as time and no about of "good relationship" is going to prevent it.
  10. Fat chance segregated troops last for very long. Separate but equal? Not likely. It takes enormous resources to run a scout troop effectively; they won't be separated for long. It's the boiling frog scenario-just look how far scouts has traveled in 4 years and the idea that they will be separate for long holds b/c . . . . .
  11. You didn't even read and listen to what I wrote.
  12. Maybe, maybe not-you definitely haven't lost the war. Some kids like to sneak-I know I did, my siblings did and we turned out just fine-served missions, married in the temple, etc. My parents kept tabs on us through certain methods. Different personalities, different kids. I don't think the battle or the war is lost. There is no feeling like "he has to sneak", it's very simple-kid sneaks b/c he is doing something he doesn't want to get in trouble for and if his parents knew he would get into trouble-unless you've got perfect kids they are going to sneak from time to time b/c they don't want to get into trouble! Adults do it all the time, they sneak around things at work, in relationships, etc. Most of the time the things people sneak about are pretty innocous-but we all still do it. For example who has never done the "boss button" at work. Yes it is immature, yes it isn't responsible, but just about everyone has done it at some point in their adult life.
  13. If it were me, I wouldn't reveal my source at all. While kids these days are very smart, they are also very stupid-stupid as in they try to sneak and skirt the rules and always end up leaving breadcrumbs that a wise parent can see a mile away. You've got to out-fox them-which shouldn't be too hard considering you are much older, more developed, smarter, etc. Yeah, I'd keep this source close to my chest-have the stern talk, drop the hammer and then in a month or so go back to my source and see if anything has changed. For a parent, you've got to protect your sources and methods of getting information about your kids . . .that's why the "a little birdie told me" is beautiful :-). 'Cuz if you reveal them-it is possible if not likely they will go deeper underground and that's not good.
  14. Of course I'd definitely nip this in the bud-if you don't she is in for a world of hurt either fairly quickly or at some point in her young life. I don't think I'd confront her like "so, I was reading in your diary, the other day . . .. . " There should be other ways to get her to open up about this. I highly doubt she is petting with him at school right? Maybe afterschool? I bet you have probably seen the boy somewhere or noticed the difference in her attitude or in the way she talks. How you confront her or get into this topic is really up to you and will depend on the particular circumstances. I'd say, yes communication is the key (but not in the way you are thinking), clear, concise, stern communication from parent to child that this type of behavior is unacceptable and that b/c the child is choosing to engage in this type of activity, some form a discipline is forthcoming. She's not 16, so she can't drive, so how in the world is she even seeing this boy? I'll say this is probably a failure of parenting prior to this occurring. She has got to see him somewhere relatively private and without the means to travel herself, so that means somewhere along the line you are facilitating this activity (in a passive way). So figure out where it is she is seeing him and lock it down. If that means no afterschool activity, so be it. A child who at 15 is petting means she will be having sex real soon if this problem isn't taken care of real fast. Make no mistake, whoever told you not to get involved in this probably don't have well-behaved well-disciplined children and don't know what they are talking about. Now she may choose to have sex, etc. and that is her choice, but you as a parent are there to make sure she understands the consequences of her decisions and the best way to prevent it is to make sure she understands consequences for actions that don't have massive consequences like pre-marital sex.
  15. I honestly don't know how widespread it was-I don't live in Utah, but I definitely know pushing the boys along so they could get Eagle without doing all the actual requirements (or cutting corners) did and does happen (my mission provided the personal examples for this). In non-LDS run Districts, it doesn't really happen, they are pretty strict on Eagle Scout projects and they grill the boys pretty good when they go for their Eagle Scout Board of Review. In LDS run Districts, I'm sure it happens; just in general the Mormon Culture in Utah is pretty soft, i.e. let's just love everyone and sing kumbayaa and we really need to help xyz boy get his Eagle. There is a lot of pressure in Utah for boys to get their Eagle-parents hold back privileges, etc. As a former Eagle Scout, it should be 100% on the boy to get his Eagle, parents should certainly encourage it, but it needs to be them who does it.
  16. Unfortunately, he's not entirely wrong. Some scout troops in Utah had very well-put together programs that did make the boys do everything they were required to do and b/c they did have well run programs boys were able to fully accomplish what they needed quickly. Unfortunately, there were a lot of troops who did not. In the interest of being "kind and nice" in these places, no boy was ever told, no you didn't do what was required to get the merit badge or to advance. The leadership in the interest of being "nice and kind and charitable", let many, many, many boys advance through the ranks without the boys actually doing the work. They allowed the boys to cut corners, or the parents would do the Eagle Scout project for them, etc. It was a major, major disservice to the boys and made a mockery of the program in the areas where this was done. So he actually does have a really good point. My son was not in an LDS cub scout group-we did community scouts for this reason-they in general pushed the boys harder and required more of them. I think it says more about Mormon Culture than anything else.
  17. No, I was speaking about what is occurring inside the Church, that was the crap phrase; more and more inside the Church (not really from leadership, but from members and a few local leadership), is this idea that really what the Great Commandment means is that we should just "love better" or "love more", that to love one's neighbor means to accept them and welcome them 100% into the fold, regardless of what they believe, or even how they behave, b/c afterall, we just need to "love". And that be doing that, we really are fulfilling the 1st Great Commandment. Which is total trash, b/c Christ said, if ye love me keep my commandments, and there are a bunch of commandments that the "love better" crowd simply disregard.
  18. I dislike the "churning out", but if you don't have a youth program that set measurable goals for boys to achieve, it's not better than an after-schools club. Young men need a program that sets goals and have them achieve those goals-it is extremely important. It's not envogue to say it b/c "we have to be fair" and everyone cries over the boy who didn't make it . . .well did he probably didn't make it b/c he didn't put forth enough effort. And that's an important lesson to learn in life-if you want something you have to work really hard to make it happen. If you want to grow men, you have to train them on how to set goals and achieve them, you don't "build boys" by having a social club, get-together where everyone sings kumbayaa and plays basketball every week-you build a weak generation.
  19. No it doesn't run it closer to custom youth programs. The genders are always separate and the activities are always tailored to the specific genders. Always! And Activity Days is really a joke, it has been around for a small amount of time with very little structure.
  20. Venturing was always small and the Church never really participated in it. The genders were always separate in Church sponsered scouting.
  21. Lol, you know I'll try it out and let you know. Honestly dude, I really don't care much anymore if they are trinitarian; in many ways they are more Christian than many Mormons are-especially the "God is just love" crowd and the First Great Commandment "Love God", really means "love your neighbor" crap. If they teach good Christian values, allow me and my son to participate-I think I can take care of any erroneous doctrine being taught to my son.
  22. No. Traditionally speaking Boy Scouts was uber-conservative and Girl Scouts was uber-liberal-the Church a traditionally ultra conservative organization did not like the values promolugated by Girl Scouts. Strange to see Girl Scouts be more conservative than BSA now . . .weird.
  23. A lot of wise comments there and this is the money quote. There are plenty of LGBTQetc. allies who are not predator who are really good people- but unfortunately they do not want to deal with the realities of what it actually means. They shut off their brain, close their eyes and say "the bad stuff doesn't exist" and if you bring it up-you are the horrible, evil bad guy. You literally can't have an open, honest, frank discussion without being branded as a "homophobe" or some evil doer and the effect is to tell others to just shut up about all the bad stuff b/c we don't want to even acknowledge it. Closeted homosexuals in BSA is one thing, open homosexuals in an organization that is supposed to teach men how to become boys is a huge, huge problem-but don't say that or you will be labeled an "evil" person. Take for example AIDS-it's a really simple disease to not get-it has extremely high rates in the homosexual community . . .gasp . . .but don't say it b/c if you bring out facts, you are a bad person. If homosexuals didn't practice homosexuality-AIDS would drop dramatically.
  24. I agree, and I agree that you agree, just that it's human nature. Why push boys to get xyz merit badge to get Life rank when the program is going away. My guess is there will be an initial surge where motivated boys and their parents work on the BSA program, but certainly the last six months, nope. Sure they will meet, go on campouts, etc (my guess is those things will be a part of the new program), there will just be very, very little interest this time next year in doing anything remotely associated with BSA. I will probably put my son in Trail Life this fall.