Openmind

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  1. I even thought of the classic excuse "midlife crisis".
  2. We had been spending more time together in the last year, talking, walking and just being together. That's why I don't understand. I was under the impression things were great in all areas because I was and thought he was working on all of them to be closer, but apparently something's missing. We have family/personal and even couple scripture study, we go to church, we have family home evening, we have done every weeks lesson for come follow me 2019, we do temple work, we do family history work, we help others when we can, see all these "we"s? That's why I thought we were on the right track. I have been analyzing everything. Attitudes, moods, speech, time, spirituality, everything. I just dont know where this came from.
  3. Getting caught doesn't by itself bring repentance and even that(realizing this isnt right) hasn't even stuck its nose up as of yet. I have been working on this for over a month...
  4. I keep hoping that he will come to the realization himself (repentance can only occur if he feels godly sorrow).
  5. I fully believe that he has convinced himself that this is true. I have been operating on that belief when I acted in the sense of trying to convince him 1) to not speak to her about it, and 2) to not have anything about her(pics or any other forms of info) on his phone. This was my attempt at preventing further action on his part, but even in these requests he has not complied ( he is finding excuses to get out of removing the remaining pics that I specifically mentioned to my phone). Some may wonder why not to just delete them entirely but they are of others as well that were at a baptism that our family considers friends. I could photoshop them to remove her but they are still on his phone...
  6. The church guidelines advise against using surrogates as well, even when the egg and sperm belong to the husband and wife and not the surrogate.
  7. Spiritual is definitely more concerning as it can prevent exaltation. I will be taking further action on this and have already begun doing so. I have already reached out to priesthood leadership and will continue to do so to get this resolved. Thank you.
  8. Honestly I would want him to get the help he needs to kick this if this were drugs.
  9. I know it was in all seriousness. Believe me I know. But the idea of my bishop being swine did relieve stress and tension. Thank you for that.
  10. This is exactly how I felt(current practice/would only come through prophet) and why I had been at a crossroads with him on accepting this.
  11. Thank you for the laugh...I needed that.
  12. Thank you all...I know it's hard to help people when you have only one side, I have tried to give you his side as much as possible from his own words and actions. I know it's hard to deal with and I feel ashamed that I have to deal with it directly. Please accept my Gratitude for ALL your help in sorting this out. My original purpose in posting was so that anyone else dealing with similar questions could find an acceptable path in dealing with this sort of issue. Now I know that my posting helped me too. Thank you so much!
  13. His no one else knowing is based on this: sacred things should be kept sacred, dont throw pearls before swine... At least that's what he says. (I do agree with sacredness and pearls)
  14. To me it's not whether or not the "revelation" is true, it's his reaction to it: secrecy, hiding(he even started taking his phone in the bathroom which he always expressed disgust about before), making secret notes about it all(I am for privacy and have never before wanted to see his personal journaling as I feel everyone needs a personal space to sort things out, but this part of it he did encrypt, not the rest), expressing verbally and in his face love for her however "pure" it claims to be.
  15. What do I say "I think my husband's loonie"? That I feel he has committed sin. (Would that be unrighteously judging if his "revelation" is true?) Would they just say that I am paranoid?That there's no way this could be true about him? That I am just seeking revenge for the pain and embarrassment (even if no one else knows anything) I feel he caused me? Would he ever forgive me for "turning him in"? You see my hesitation??