lagniappe

Members
  • Posts

    16
  • Joined

  • Last visited

lagniappe's Achievements

  1. A few years ago I went through an entire decade of severe trials. I spent so much of my time and energy focusing on surviving that life outside of survival was put on hold. People around me were developing talents, building careers, having and raising children, (this was during my 20s) and I was frozen. Or at least that's how it felt at the time. Thankfully I made it through that dark time, but I had many why me moments. I wondered why my friends and family were allowed to grow and enjoy life and I was stuck. That's not to say that they hadn't any hardships, but nothing like what I was going through. At least that's how it felt. When I finally came out the other end, I realized how much I had grown, just not in ways quite as easy to measure. The strength I gained from being forged in that fire is invaluable. Still, there were moments when I wondered did I really have to go through all of that? Was it necessary? There was a wonderful talk given in my ward just this past Sunday and it included a quote by Orson F. Whitney that has really given me a lot of peace on the subject. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, … and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire.” It gives me such comfort to know that my trials served a purpose beyond the pain. I didn’t really lose a decade. Despite how it felt at the time.
  2. Welcome, Sarah, and good luck on your book. Sounds interesting and I think it's cool that you've got an LDS character and are trying to make her as authentic as possible. I also studied creative writing in school and am working on a book. I'm totally with you on research being the most fun part. I can research all day long, but have a hard time motivating myself to actually write sometimes, probably because it's so mentally draining, at least in my experience. I'm mostly a lurker here (too lazy to post usually), but I know there are lots of posters that would be more than happy to answer any questions you have about LDS beliefs and culture.
  3. These are my favorite kinds of posts. I love investigator journeys! I hope you continue to keep us posted. And definitely let us know how church goes on Sunday. And you sooooo have to ride the bike! I don't have any advice to give because anything I'd say has been said, but it sounds like you're on a good path.
  4. You have my utmost respect and admiration. You must be an extraordinarily strong person to have been given these harrowing challenges, although I'm sure it doesn't always feel that way. Thank you for being so open and for sharing your story. You are an inspiration and proof of what can be endured if we put our faith in the Savior and in our Father's plan. Peace be unto you.
  5. Fun thread. I got married at 21 so didn't get the chance to even think about serving a mission (I'm a female, obviously), but I'd love to serve one as an old fogey one day. My dream mission would be to go somewhere in Africa I think. The next time you're bored go to youtube and type in "mission call" and you can watch people's reactions to finding out where they'll be serving. Some of them are really funny. And of course most are very sweet. Receiving and opening one's mission call is often a great big production. Family and friends are summoned, bets are places, laughter and tears are shared. I came across one where someone's brother had swapped out the real mission call (it arrives in a large white envelope via snail mail for those that don't know) for a fake. Ha ha ha! Isn't that terrible?
  6. Thanks for that, HoosierGuy. I was actually thinking of something along those lines and you summed it up very nicely.
  7. Thanks everyone. Especially for the links. Some of those I have bookmarked already and some I didn't come across. (Waaaayyyy too many show up in the search at lds.org to read them all unfortunately.) I'll definitely look those over. I had considered that Rameumptom, although I know nothing about fishing so I'd definitely have to do some research! I have to speak for 15 minutes too. Ugh. I don't think I've ever talked more than 10 minutes before, if that. This ward generally only has 2 speakers a week, unlike most of the other wards I've been in where there are 3, sometimes 4.
  8. Thanks for the thoughts. Still not sure what direction I'm going to go with this talk; based on what i've read the last couple of days there are several different interpretations. But I'm not quite as stressed about it.
  9. I was given the assignment to give a talk this Sunday on Mark 1:17 and I'm feeling stumped for some reason. I thought it seemed like an easy enough topic until I started looking up talks on it and now I'm unclear on what exactly fishers of men means. I assumed it meant missionary work, and that seems to be what most of the talks on that scripture are focused on, but other times magnifying callings comes up, or being more Christlike, or enduring to the end. So what exactly does fishers of men mean? Anybody have any thoughts or insights? It's been more than 10 years since I've given a talk in sacrament meeting (until about a year ago I was inactive off and on for 10 years) so I'm really rusty and I'm feeing stressed about it. I'm not a very good speaker. Singing or dancing in front of large groups of people I'm fine with, but speaking...not so much. I'm not the most articulate person in the world, and I have to have a talk completely written out in order to be coherent at all. I wish I was one of those people that could walk up there with bullet points and go, but sadly I'm not.
  10. I think you should give Mormonism for Dummies a try. I was reading the reviews when I went to look for it and I want it for myself now haha. ~Jill
  11. Oh, and the book is actually called Mormonism for Dummies. Here it is on Amazon: Amazon.com: Mormonism For Dummies: Jana Riess, Christopher Kimball Bigelow: Books It's got good reviews and does cover history. Again, I haven't read it myself, but I have heard people recommend it.
  12. It's under the Gospel Boards section of this website. Learn about the Mormon Church - LDS Mormon Forums
  13. Actually there is a LDS for Dummies. Although I've never read it so I can't tell you if it's worth buying or not. I'm sure others will know of a good book for you. I gotta give you props for being so patient with your roommate. Seriously, I would have been ticked. As a LDS, one of my biggest pet peeves is pushy members.
  14. I'm sure it does happen, but I don't think it's as prolific as you think. (I imagine reality is somewhere in between our two vastly different perspectives.) If what happened to your wife happened in any of the wards I've been in, a serious smack down would have occurred, by the relief society president, by the bishop, and by the stake relief society president, for starters. I don't have any children and nobody has ever said anything about it to me. Not once. But no matter how much this sort of thing does happen, the main point is that if you can't go forward with optimism then you're doing yourself a great disservice. Good luck on your journey. I can emphathize quite a bit.
  15. Given the fact that I've never once come across a woman in the church like the type that you just mentioned, much less entire wards full of them, I'd say that you stand a pretty good chance of finding someone again. As long as you prepare yourself for her, and that would include healing yourself and forgiving the women that you speak of. I'm not saying those types of women aren't out there, but I think they must be in the minority because I've never met one. At least they are in my experience, and I've lived in and visited many different wards. I mentioned the situation to my mother, who is the stake relief society president of the neighboring stake, and she was appalled. She'd never come across anything like that in all her years of serving the RS. Overwhelmingly the wome in the church that I know (married, single, divorced) are kind, thoughtful, and non-judgemental people. I find the idea of only being willing to date a RM odd, especially considering the fact that there are so many converts in the church these days. Many men never had the chance to go on a mission, and some that did have the chance weren't spiritually ready at the time. My father-in-law, who is also my bishop, didn't go on a mission (although he's always been a member) and he's one of the best men that I've ever known. I would never hold not going on a mission against him. And neither would most women that I know. I think it would also help a great deal is if you could learn to be optimistic. I know it's hard not to be bitter in the situation that you're in. And trust me, I do know. My husband, who was raised in the church and went on a mission, left me last year and he came thisclose from completely aposticizing from the church. Luckily he's made an about face and we're on our way back to being together and he's regained his testimony, but there was a period of several months where I was sure I'd be back in the dating pool again. Going through that has been by leaps and bounds the hardest thing I've ever been through in my life and I'm extremely grateful that the Lord comforted me like he did, otherwise I know I would have fallen into a very severe depression and would probably still be in it. I forced myself to be optimistic (although I didn't always succeed) and know that if I didn't despair and that if I tried to be as Christ-like as I possibly could, that I would eventually be happy again...whether that meant happy single or happy married. Anyway, my point is that if you go into this thinking you'll fail then you will. If you go into it with a positive attitude then you're chances of finding someone again will improve tremendously. I assume you don't want a woman that would be attracted to despair and negativity. You want one that's drawn to light and joy. Just my 2 cents.