Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'depression'.

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • Third Hour Popular Forums
    • Third Hour Admin Alerts
    • LDS Gospel Discussion
    • General Discussion
    • Learn about The Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter-day Saints
    • Current Events
    • Advice Board
  • Gospel Boards
    • Jewish Beliefs Board
    • Christian Beliefs Board
    • Organizations
    • Study Boards
  • General Discussion Forums
    • Parenting
    • Interests
    • Just for Fun
  • Resources
    • Family
    • Missionary Work
    • Family History
    • Preparedness
    • Share
    • LDS Resources and Information
  • International Forums

Find results in...

Find results that contain...


Date Created

  • Start

    End


Last Updated

  • Start

    End


Filter by number of...

Joined

  • Start

    End


Group


AIM


MSN


Website URL


ICQ


Yahoo


Jabber


Skype


Location


Interests


Religion

  1. I have been an active member of the church all of my life and served a mission in Europe. I had a lot of success during my mission years and was unshakeable in my faith in Christ as my Savior. During this time I was in a severe bike injury (broken back). I refused to leave the mission and recovered and completed the work there. During this time, however, I fell into a state of deep depression (something that has plagued me sporadicaly most of my life). I held on,despite feelings of suicide, to my knowledge that Jesus Christ was my Savior and Redeemer. The 20 years since that period has been one of intense struggle with depression and suicidal ideation. I have sought medical, psychological from professionals and spiritual guidance from priesthood leaders. I have faithfully kept up the mechanics of obedience (personal prayer, prayer with my wife and children, FHE, sunday meeting attendance, temple attendance, accepting and fulfilling callings, I was ordained a high-priest when I was , but have progressively felt less and less as my depressions have become more frequent, longer and profound. I feel no antipathy towards the gospel, I still believe in the existence of God and Christ. I simply do not feel apart of it. I feel forsaken by Him whom I have tried to serve. I understand that some of the medications that I take can lead to a flat affect, a general disinterest in things, apathy. But if I stop them for any amount of time, thoughts of suicide return (lease not that I do not feel suicidal presently, nor have for a few years So please don't feel that I am in danger of ending my life) I have been inarguably been blessed in the intervening years. I was able to complete complete my PhD in molecular and cellular biology and have been working at a top ranked cancer hospital in the country for several years. That said, I have also nearly died of a prolonged bout with cancer and bacterial meningitis, the latter of which required me to learn how to talk and walk again. I've been told that the lord is just testing me. If this i With this background out of the way, I feel a rapidly diminishing affinity for God or Christ. My feelings of spiritual abondonment are beginning to escalate to resentment and questioning the existence of God. I am not certain what more I can do or sacrifice for Him to merit, not temporal blessings, but some semblance of spiritual well-being, faith. I have been councilled by a bishop that I need to learn to accept the atonement and let the savior make up the difference. I asked him how to do this beyond what I am already trying and he had no answer for me. Another bishop simply told me that its something I will just have to live with and that I my never have any resolution. I've also been told that the lord is just testing me. If so, then I am clearly failing. These experiences have mostly decimated my faith. Over the past few years I have felt increasing resntment but now I mostly don't care one way or the other if god exists or not, with one exception. I need to stay active and do whatever I can to help my children in their relationship with the lord. The bottom line is that I feel apart from the plan of god but still belive that those around me are deeply loved by Him. I'm sorry to ramble and thank you for listening.