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Found 25 results

  1. As someone who has been investigating the church for just over a year and a half, I've found it very hard to find out anything outside of Doctrine and Scripture about what it's truly like to become a member, not so much the being a member after baptism etc. I'm lucky enough to have a friend who is a life long member and has answered every question I've had. Ive found it really difficult to connect with all the missionaries as it's a very foreign concept to me to be "put with" people I don't know but who are assigned to be my friends. I also have difficulty because even though I'm a girl, I've never had many girl friends, I've always got along better with boys and find it really hard to connect with the sisters or any girls in general, so much so that I felt anxious every time I saw them in a Church and had an anxious breakdown when I had a lesson alone with them as it felt like I was cornered and being pushed towards baptism that I definitely wasn't ready for, I was holding back tears the entire meeting. It really made me feel like I didn't want to go any further and felt it pushed my confidence down. If I hadn't had my friend, I would never have gone back. I know for certain that if I'd been on my own and looking in to joining the Church, I wouldn't have even got as far as the front door if I'd been left to be led there and guided by missionaries. I'm always amazed how people have gone on the journey this route as its so alien to me. It would be really useful to have some resources from new converts or current investigators as to how they are coping with everything. My biggest hang up is baptism, I just don't know how I'm ever going to reach it. I'm absolutely terrified at the thought of the ceremony, having people look at me, being a focus, it fills me with dread but I so want the gift of the Holy Spirit I would gain from it
  2. Alright, so, basically I need some advice. I'm staying in another country for 3 months, just got here a couple of weeks ago. (Originally from the US). I used to struggle with pornography a little bit and repented of it all a while ago. Earlier today, I had a relapse and looked at some. I have been 100% clean ever since I first confessed, well over a year ago. I want to confess and do so without delay! I was thinking I would just go to church in the country I'm in this Sunday (they have both branches and wards close to me, or at least that I can manage to get to). I was feeling so good and hopeful... But then realized that my records weren't moved over here... So does that mean I couldn't confess to a bishop here because I'm not under that "jurisdiction" or whatever word would go there? I want to repent as soon as possible and not have this hanging over me. There is also a temple here I wanted to go to and now I'm not sure if I should before confessing. But if I can't confess while I'm here what am I supposed to do? I'm only home for a short time when I return from this country before I go to one of the BYU schools, less than a week. I'm afraid of confessing right when I get there because I'm afraid of the academic consequences I would face, especially seeing as it would be my first semester there transferring in from another university. While I recognize fully the severity of this type of sin I don't want to be kicked out and don't think I should be since this was a slip-up for me and I'm trying to be better. I just want to confess and feel better and more fortified. I'm also afraid if I wait I'll lose the courage to do so. Can I confess to a bishop here in the country I'm in! Clearly, I'm freaking out and spiraling, please help.
  3. So long story short. We were married for 7 years. She’s already filed for divorce. It was just one argument/fight too many and she snapped. She filed for divorce a week ago from today. No children between us. We were making plans to have kids, to move out of the apartment and buy a house. Then a little time later, the incident occurs and then divorce 3 months later. Incident = the argument that lead to a short fight. We became quiet for a few days. She brought it up again and I stone-walled and she snapped. (now you can jump to the last paragraph) When the incident happened, she became a completely different person, full of disdain toward me and didn’t want to go to counseling or anything. Only went to the bishop with me to tell him she wanted out because she didn’t love me anymore. For 2 months I cried and pleaded her to stay. I knew I had anger/communication issues and that was what made her snap. Other things contributed too, but that’s in more detail below. The incident happened in October and she kept saying she was indecisive. In December was the month we separated. We agreed for 4 weeks and could make it longer or reconcile by January’s beginning with couples therapy (though she was against it). But as soon as the 4 weeks were over, she blocked me on fb and over the phone told me that her decision was divorce. As much as I had any chance to speak to her through the 3 months,(since she was avoiding communication with me) she kept trumping every debate with “it’s my choice”. I couldn’t challenge that, not even God could. I told and showed her my efforts of changing and that I was going to the counselor to gain more than just visiting bishop alone. She’d say, “that’s good and I recognize that you are changing, but it’s too late, and I’ve made my choice” She simply did not care for anything anymore and became extremely hard-hearted. Some of her arguments were that, She didn’t want to go to couples therapy because we’ve already done many sessions of counseling and bishop visits in the past years and things did not change. Or that I’ve sat you down and spoken to you about these issues. Which is true, but me being the foolish husband I was, didn’t think it was that serious at the time and that over a few more years, we’d be polishing these things out naturally. She debated that it should’ve been polished out by the 3rd or 4th year of our marriage, and not fight or argue anymore. I pleaded with her and said that many couples still argue, though slightly, while in their 60s or 70s. yet we can accomplish complete unity much earlier than that, but year 7 was still work in progress. She didn’t agree. Around Christmas, she went to spend about 2 weeks with her family 3 hours north (this was during the December separation). So at home alone, I found her “5 love languages book” and read it cover to cover. I even read parts of “Helping and Healing our Families” and “Strengthening our Families” both based off the Family Proclamation. They are both great books of instruction and understanding. It opened my mind up so much to my rotten reactions and it’s psychological effects on my wife. There were so many gems that if followed, would turn any home into a temple. She didn’t care about the 5 Love languages, and called it BS and that it never worked on me. I pointed out that it did, because I had noticed a change in her before the incident made her snap. I said I knew something was different about her but I didn’t know what. I had never read the book and took the Idea before as goofy. But after reading the book with the state of mind I had now, I understood what she was going through, or doing for me. I tried to console her that the book stated the same thing that our prophets and apostles would teach about a marriage at the brink of divorce, that if we worked together to bring it back, it becomes an even stronger relationship never to become weary again. She didn’t care to believe me or dare to even give it a try. She was against everything, even saying “why would I want to come back to a husband I hate?” Some of my faults were that I wasn’t intimate enough with her. She said that we were living like roommates and weren’t spending time together. Though I thought that things were actually fine. In some fights, I would say harsh things, but only, and only in the height of my emotions. Never have or would I say anything of that hurtful nature in regular arguments or everyday conversations, at all. Nor did I think it. Didn’t use vulgar language either. Just harsh criticism that I’m ashamed to mention more of. The worst thing about me is that I would shut down in fights and be emotionally distant for a few days. I would just go quiet and as John Gottman describes, would stone-wall her (another thing I learned going through this ordeal) This is what would give her that psychological pain, where she had no idea how to get me to respond or had all kinds of racing bad thoughts. In my mind I thought that I was saving a bad fight from getting worse or longer, and didn’t want to continue. But she was mentally struggling since she needed responses from me. I had no idea what she was going through. Though now I do. When the incident made her snap, she ended up cutting her emotional connection with me and in a sense, stone-walled me. That was the point when she gave up. But didn’t say anything to me for nearly 7 days, and I was freaking out of my mind, wanting a response from her, but I kept my cool too, not wanting to bring the fight up again. On the 7th day she turned to me and said we need to talk, and I just burst out, “yes we do please” (feeling all scared inside) This was when I realized what I had been putting her through for the past few years. She didn’t stone-wall me as a “taste of your own medicine” treatment, but she was simply done and disconnected her feelings and emotions from me. Essentially abandoning the relationship that October. We didn’t fight/argue all the time, we had many more good times too. But if the fights went long enough, then would I get to that point of shutting down, though otherwise, we’d solve the issue. But that was another thing she didn’t like – when I did stone-wall, the issue was not resolved and pushed away. Now that I know what my behavior truly resonates, I am absolutely adamant to NEVER do it again, to anyone, period. I’ve finally learned that part of my behavior and words are considered to be psychological and emotional abuse. Never in the world thought I to be capable and guilty of such things. The more I read from the books and googled the principles, the more I realized my words, acts an effects. Though not to extreme levels of some crazy abusive families, I had been unaware of what little I was doing. Crying as I type this, I hate myself so so much for being like this and wish I learned better earlier. She is/was the best thing that ever happened to me in my entire life. And if I just swallowed my pride long enough and apologized more often while following her humble pleadings, our relationship would’ve been superb by now. I wish the earth would just open up and swallow me out of existence. I’m so ashamed of myself, and my good parents, and wonderful friends that respected me. I so humbly tried my best to apologize and plead for her loving forgiveness and her return. But the divorce is in process and as I observe her with her friends and family, she hasn’t a care in the world of letting me go. Multiple times, she said she’ll forgive me someday, but that she’ll surely never coming back. It seemed like no one could or even would do anything. Even the counselor she was seeing was not a member, though a Christian and is a “marriage/family” counselor, I don’t know what she was feeding my wife. I made her my counselor too, but she didn’t seem to be interested in helping me gain my wife back. Sadly I’ve read many places online that counselors these days only care about their client’s “personal” happiness regardless if it dissolves a marriage or not. I can’t verify this. But according to the counselor, she said that my wife was “losing hope”(I learned of this while 2 mths of pleading my wife to stay and professed my resolved to change my communication), but there may still be a chance. I know that we can’t take other people’s free agency away, but I was hoping that a church leader could encourage some type of reconciliation workshop for the relationship before resorting to divorce. The bishop seemed cornered when she said it was her choice. Seemed the best he could do was send us Uchtdorf’s talk about “In Praise of those who save” which also had gems of marriage redemption. And I considered myself guilty of nearly every vice of pride in the first paragraph of “Set aside pride” section of the talk. I’m doing what I can to repent. But I cannot prove my change in word and deed to a ghost. But as much as I admitted my mistakes and that I now know better in being a more supportive husband, She remained cold. Much of the counsel that brethren from the church has given me is to give her some time after the divorce to let her remember the good times. And perhaps approach her again. Another in church though we weren’t compatible (but I don’t believe in soul mates at all). And most others have advised me that she’s been suffering for a while contemplating the idea, and has now executed it, so let her go and move on. My parents and a coworker understood my incredible heartache for her. They said that it was because she was my first (and only) girlfriend who became my wife. Dating in college I dated girls once or twice before letting them go. Never got serious. Nor did I date in High school. But she was special and I know I couldn’t let her go. I know that I’ve faulted in several ways that have become negligent of her, or taking our sealing for granted. But I’ve awoken from my prideful slumber and am trying to turn my world back right-side up, and nothing is working. Frighteningly, she does not seem to be the same woman I knew just days prior to the incident. There is so much more I could share. But I think this is long enough for now. If you have other questions I could try to answer it for you. Please, if there is anyone out there with some way to help me gain back the Goddess I once took for granted, I will be forever in your debt. Please anyone. Yes there were bad times, but is outweighed by the good times which were extremely memorable and I loved spending time with her, hearing her laugh at my jokes while grocery shopping, or looking for Christmas/birthday gifts for family, walking through the mall, and visiting other members and having dinner with them, and talking about deep doc with her. I’ve pictured our lives and future children together for the longest time, and it would kill me to think that she’s preparing herself to seek and seal herself to another. Please, if anyone has stories of how something in my state can be redeemed, I’d love to hear it.
  4. I'm Tegan; I'm a member of the Church of England but have grown up around LDS members; I've always been interested in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and their beliefs which is why I'm doing my dissertation on Christians and marketing with a focus on Latter Day Saints. I've grown up not feeling represented for my beliefs in society as a whole and in marketing which is why I wanted to do this for my research. After doing some interviews with LDS members, I felt like getting more of an insight into Latter Day Saints' beliefs is insanely important for the future of marketing. I would be beyond grateful for anyone to do my survey (I've posted it below) or just to reply to this post with what is the most important aspect of their faith and why. Christians and MarketingThank you in advance to anyone that does my survey or replies to this post and I can't wait to learn more about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints on Third Hour
  5. Hi there! I'm new here, and I need some advice. I am in the YW presidency, and our president just told us Sunday that her husband accidentally walked in on one of our young women in the bathroom video sexting with her skirt down. We have two bathrooms in our building that are for either men or women, so there was no ill intent on the part of our y.w. president's husband. We all encouraged her to talk to the young woman, or at least alert her mother to the situation. She said that she spoke to the mom, but not about anything specific, just asked the mother how the y.w. was doing at home. My concern is that this young woman may eventually, if she hasn't already, be sending videos and photos that can be used to then black mail her into doing things she may not want to do, possibly even ending up in an unwanted pregnancy. I would like to know what anybody else in this situation would feel they need to do? This young woman is also our babysitter, and we really love she and her family. If this were my daughter, though it would be hard to hear, I would want to know so that I could monitor her technology use(or even take it away) and reinforce some I just a crazy helicopter mom in this new era of readily available explicit technology and pornography? We all only get one life to live, and I certainly don't want this young woman to ruin her life with a naive, stupid mistake. HELP!!! Thank you for your thoughts!
  6. Ive been in a relationship for a while now and things have taken a different turn than I expected. I was born into in the church and faithfully go as often as I can. Im still young and living at home but I've always wanted to serve a mission. Ive always loved the church and believed everything about it but I struggle with staying sexually pure and resisting temptation. After repenting and talking to my bishop would I still have the opportunity to serve a mission? Ive yet to go into my bishop but feel great regret almost everyday. I know for a fact that I won't marry this man and I want my old life back. This is one of the worst decisions I've ever made in my life and I feel as if ill never be the same again because I have sinned so badly. I really don't know what to do.
  7. Here's my story; I'm a 20 yo male. I joined the Church almost two years ago after a long and exhausting journey searching for the Truth. I joined because I felt so comfortable... As soon as I started to attend Sunday services I realized that the LDS Church was the place where I wanted to be the rest of my life and where I wanted to raise my family. The problem is that now, two years later, I don't feel comfortable anymore. Here's why: I feel overwhelmed with my callings (Ward Mission Leader, Seminary Teacher, Young Men secretary and Elders Quorum instructor). I feel like I don't have time to fulfill all of them. Besides Church activities, I'm attending college and that limits the time I can spend doing Church work. My Bishop doesn't seem to understand my situation. When I talk to him about it, he tells me to fast, pray and study the Scriptures more often, and that's exactly what I've been doing, but I keep feeling the same way. I'm a YSA, and my fellow YSAs rule me out of everything. I'm like the black sheep of the group and I don't exactly know why. My only friend in Church once told me that the other YSAs said that I just "don't belong to the group because I come from a wealthy family". I knoe it sounds ridiculous, but that's what I've heard. (Please note that I'm from Mexico City, economic gap and social status are a huge deal here. Racism and discrimination between wealthy or white and poor or brown people is not uncommon. I'm not racist btw, that's just the way things work in Mexico. I'm the only white person in my Ward and I have felt terribly excluded from all Church activities.) Whenever I think of my future, I feel terribly overwhelmed and desperated. I don't see myself attending Ward Councils for the rest of my life. I sometimes just want to be a normal Christian who attends Church, reads the Scriptures, preaches occasionally and serves others without having to immerse myself in administrative issues of the Church. My Ward doesn't seem to work. Our attendance is lower and lower each week and members are turning unfriendly. Nobody pays attention in Sacrament Meeting anymore, most members sleep or keep texting while the speakers talks. As a Ward Mission Leader, I've talked to my Bishop so we can help return members who faded out. My bishop has promised to talk about it with his two counselors. Needless to say, it's been almost two months since we talked and he still hasn't consulted his counselors. PLEASE my fellow brothers and sisters, I need help. I know the Church is true and I've felt the Spirit so strong... I just feel like my Ward is not working, like there's something wrong with it and that discourages me so much
  8. So, not an LDS question but I trust the people here, at least to not make fun of me for not knowing about certain things because you all know about my situation and how my life has been on hold for the past 10 years. Thus, my knowledge of certain things is limited since my experience is limited. My question: is there some sort of savings account that you can have at the bank where you put money into it and the money grows over a period of time? Or is that just something I made up in my head? I didn't want to go to the bank and ask about it yet because I feel like that is foolish as a concept, that it's wrong, and I don't want to look like an idiot asking about something that doesn't even make sense. But you guys will tell me if it's dumb or not. So, do banks have that kind of thing or am I thinking of an investment or something? I admit, working at the call center where a couple of our clients are financial advisory institutions, my view is probably skewed on what BANKS can do.
  9. Everyone faces challenges. Some challenges can be tough to overcome. While the Spirit of Zion can be built on any hill or in any valley, the true mission of the Church can not be fully realized without resting on a firm Home Teaching foundation... not only do I believe that... it is supported by HT data. Home Teaching efforts strengthen a ward in every possible way. A lack of Home Teaching efforts degrade a ward in every possible way. Home teaching is a priesthood responsibility of teachers, priests, and Melchizedek Priesthood holders. Home teachers “visit the house of each member, exhorting them to pray vocally and in secret and attend to all family duties” (D&C 20:51). They are assigned to families and individuals to “watch over … and be with and strengthen them” (D&C 20:53). They “warn, expound, exhort, and teach, and invite all to come unto Christ” (D&C 20:59). Where possible, home teachers visit members in their homes at least monthly. Home teachers may also find other meaningful ways to watch over and strengthen the families they are assigned...they may render service to the families or contact family members by mail or telephone. Home teachers represent the Lord, the bishop, and quorum or group leaders. HT'ers consult with the head of the household about the family’s needs and about ways to be most helpful. Home teachers become acquainted with family members’ interests and needs and recognize special events in their lives. ... home teachers help parents ensure that their children are blessed, baptized, and confirmed. They help parents ensure their sons have the Aaronic Priesthood and Melchizedek Priesthood conferred upon them and are ordained to priesthood at the appropriate ages. Home teachers help members strengthen their faith in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and encourage them to make and keep sacred covenants. This service is especially important to new members and less-active members. .
  10. Hello there all! I have been so frustrated lately with an issue I have been having with my garmets and I would like to know if anyone else has had this issue and has found a solution. I have been getting extremely bad rashes on my armpits from my garmets for the last little while. I started with carinessa, then changed to cotton-poly. The problem is when these rashes get really bad I dont wear my garmets to bed for a night and I wake up and it is better. I hate not wearing my garmets but I really don't know where to go from here the rash is so painful. Any recommendations because I'm desperate
  11. So... here is my story. I hope to get your feedback... Im a relatively new convert and fairly new Elders Quorum President. The quorum has a history of inactivity ( 50-60 % inactivity ) and not much in the way of organization by previous elders quorum presidents. Home Teaching is in the single digits. Service is nearly non-existent. Finding someone to accept an invitation to serve others is very hard. To say we have challenges in finding motivated individuals is an understatement. I struggled to fill my Presidency for many months. I have this crazy idea that what this quorum needs is leadership, focused efforts and lots of Gospel influence. As much as I believe the Lord does not call the qualified... he qualifies the called... I still feel the need to get feedback from others on my Elders Quorum Presidency Agenda form PRIOR to introducing it to my Presidency. If you would review my Elders Quorum Presidency meeting agenda I would appreciate it. I plan on using my keys to implement this agenda, slowly but steadily, in an effort to benefit the all the brethren. Thank you for your time and effort should you choose to leave me some feedback.. Elders Quorum Presidency Meeting Monthly Agenda Items Recurring Monthly Agenda Assignments Opening Prayer— EQ President (EQ P) Inspirational Scripture— EQ 1st Counselor (EQ 1) Spiritual Thought— EQ 2nd Counselor (EQ 2) Record Presidency Meeting Minutes-EQ Secretary (EQ S) Elders Quorum Member Assignment (EQ A) MONTHLY AGENDA ITEMS Report from other Meetings (EQP, 1, 2, S) PEC Meeting (EQ P) Ward Member Welfare Concerns (EQ P, 1, 2, S) Ward Council Meeting (EQ P) Ward Missionary Work (EQ P, 1, 2, S, A) Stake Meetings (EQ P, 1, 2, S) Proclaiming the Gospel-(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Missionary Moments/Opportunity New Member Discussions New Member Fellowshipping & Retention (EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Feeding The Missionaries Redeeming the Dead-(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Temple Trip w/ Youth Ward Temple Day Elders Quorum Temple Outing Perfecting the Saints-(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Prospective Elders Update Home Teaching Service Projects Sunday Lessons Quorum Committee Activity Reports Agenda for 1st Sunday Quorum Meeting Discussion Items-(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Open Callings Family Search Project (Indexing) Teaching In The Savior's Way Emergency Preparedness-(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) Emergency Preparedness Update Emergency Equipment Discussion Preparedness Information C.A.M.S. Calendar/Assignments/Missionary/Service—(EQP, 1, 2, S, A) C Calendar/Assignments/Missionary/Service Reminders To Be Addressed With Quorum: Set Apart Bro Smith as Instructor (EQ P) Release Bro Smith As Instructor & Hold A Vote Of Thanks (EQ 1,2) Call Additional Instructor (EQ P) Schedule Personal Priesthood Interviews (EQ S) Address Home Teaching Concerns/Companionships/Assignments (EQ P,1,2,S) Identify Individuals Of Concern for EQP/Bishopric Visits (EQ P,1,2,S,A) Review of Previous C.A.M.S.—(EQ S) Schedule Next Meeting/Send Out C.A.M.S. Reminder—(EQ S) Closing prayer—(EQ P)
  12. I am an 18 year old member of the church who has struggled with depression for some time. Even though I have had small bouts and shown slight signs of depression in the past, may biggest issues started last year around October when stress from deciding what I would do after high school triggered something that brought major episodes of depression. Since then, it has been a roller coaster with trying to deal with what I am facing. I told my parents and eventually sought a therapist. I recently made an appointment with a psychiatrist and starting in late January, I will be on antidepressants. Throughout all of this, i am going to school and trying to live life as normally as I can. I originally planned to go on a mission, but I decided I would not be able to until I got this under control and now, I honestly don't even want to go on a mission anymore. This whole experience has left me seriously pessimistic and hopeless about the future. I know that the church is true and everything that I have been going through has been a trial I am meant to bare in order to test my faith, but I find the idea of going on like this immensely bleak. I honestly can find no reason for going on in my life and find nothing to bring me joy any more. I even try to date and find things that keep my mind off of my doubts, but nothing has worked. Dating is hard, especially since there are not a lot of Mormon girls in my area. I have run out of ideas and I find myself with so little will to live, I fear that eventually I will wish to take my own life. Up until this point, I have rejected all thoughts about taking my life because I know the pain I would bring my family, but I am afraid that eventually all thought and feeling will give way to the temptation so heavily put upon my head. If anyone can give a word of advice or help me in the direction to finding a purpose, I would be very grateful.
  13. I am needing some reassurance from all my fellow members. I feel alone, afraid and worthless. I feel like God has abandoned me. I have been dealing with a masturbation addiction for a long time, and I've been cleaning it up with the help of my awesome bishop. I just got my pat. blessing, and now I'm working on getting my mel. priesthood so I can go on a service mission (since I've had health problems and won't be able to serve a full time mission). I usually meet with the bishop once a week. However, the last few weeks since getting my pat. blessing I've been slipping up. My bishop told me I can get the priesthood after a week of being clean. So far, nothing has come of that since I've been struggling. I am depressed, sad, and lonely. I feel like I'm never going to get out of this pit! How do I do it! I feel so worthless! I am sick of life! I am afraid God has abandoned me! How can I know He is loving me? How do I get over this? I need to be able to stay clean during my mission as well! I need help! I am sick of slipping up! I am so frustrated! I need to know how to use the freaking Atonement but I don't know how!!!!! I pray for help, but what does God give me? Nothing! I've been praying for years for help! Still, I'm stuck in this hole! I want Him to fish me out, but He doesn't seem to care.
  14. I'm giving my farewell talk this Sunday and it would be great to get some ideas on some resources I could use or some things I could talk about. The lord requires your full commitment not just a contribution. Thank you for your help
  15. When I logged into my account a few minutes ago, there was a red dot by the envelope at the top of the screen which, when you click on it, lets your view your inbox. The red dot had the number "one" written on it, but when I clicked on the envelope, the dot disappeared and I had no new messages. If someone could explain that, that would be great
  16. When I logged into my account a few minutes ago, there was a red dot by the envelope at the top of the screen which, when you click on it, lets your view your inbox. The red dot had the number "one" written on it, but when I clicked on the envelope, the dot disappeared and I had no new messages. If someone could explain that, that would be great
  17. When I logged into my account a few minutes ago, there was a red dot by the envelope at the top of the screen which, when you click on it, lets your view your inbox. The red dot had the number "one" written on it, but when I clicked on the envelope, the dot disappeared and I had no new messages. If someone could explain that, that would be great
  18. Hi all, first time ever on here. Just ... needing some LDS-based support on this one, as our views on family have just become so different from the worlds'... Here's the thing: my husband and I have 2 beautiful children, a boy and a girl. They are little handfuls; full of life, crazy energy, smart little boogers. I know I should be grateful for what I have, and I am. But I know I'm not done. I have always, always wanted more than two. Ideally, 4 seems perfect to me, and I have always said this. And more than that, our family simply does not feel complete. But my husband? He has absolutely no desire to have more. We've discussed it a few times already, but for some reason this weekend it's really hitting home: We will not have any more. I spent all list night crying about it, and even now I cannot stop the tears. But he is unmoving. Just this morning he said to me "I know the thought of not having more makes you feel sad, but for me.. I just feel relieved." He doesn't feel capable of having more and is just not open to it. As much as he genuinely loves our son and daughter, he does not enjoy small children. He cringes at the though of more babies. And while I have joy in the two already here, I still find myself heartbroken and grieving. And it's only getting worse with time. I will continue to pray for comfort, for a way to cope and find happiness. I will do my best to have faith that all will be well. And I will try my best not to goad him, harass him about it, or coerce him into having children he doesn't want. But how can I have any hope when my husband feels this way? If this is how things are now, what's the point in hoping for anything different in the next life? How can I cope with the possibility of my eternal family being limited to what it is now? I just... need to talk about it I guess. Is anyone else facing this, or has faced it? Please, share your experiences, thoughts and feelings with me.
  19. I'm getting baptised soon. Unfortunately, I've developed something of a crush on one of the missionaries. We're both the same age - in our late teens - and he just happens to be particularly good-looking. I've tried to not let it distract me during our lessons together, and I generally try to talk to other missionaries and church members during church events like the weekly sports matches, I try to talk to other people instead of him so that my crush on him doesn't serve as a distraction. However, when we're talking - such as when he's trying to teach me stuff during the lessons - I find it very difficult to look at him or maintain eye contact. I know such crushes are unlawful but I can't get rid of it. Any advice on how to deal with it? One of the annoying things about it is that I am asexual - I feel absolutely no desire to have sex with anybody - but I still get crushes on people.
  20. I really need help with this. I really would love some advice. I just got baptized not even a day ago... My boyfriend and I have talked about the LoC and our limits and that we cannot do things that break the LoC. He came over after my baptism and he kept trying to make out with me and kept trying to touch my butt and I sternly told him no and tried pushing him away. But he kept trying to. But I stopped him. Then we were just cuddling and he tried laying on top of me and tried kissing me once again and now after he left I feel guilty... And now I don't know what to do...
  21. Oh dear, I truly am terribly sorry to bring such negativity in what seems to be an exceptionally bright and lively forum, however I'm afraid that my husband and I are quite lost. As devout members of the Mormon church, truly, our wishes have always lied in the saving of young souls, through although, recently, our son of fourteen years has declared himself as atheist, through a rather lengthy letter which described why he felt a disconnect towards the Mormon religion. Included within it, he mentioned that he felt as though our consistent Mormon outings were rather harmful to him, and the cause for his often sullen and irritable mood. Also mentioned, were several debunked pieces of Mormon evidence (such as Nahom, how joseph smith could have written the Book Of Mormon, the witnesses, ect.), as well as what he felt were logical flaws in the book of Mormon (linguistic troubles, "anachronisms", population, "impossible" events, ect.) . He fears that a continuation of his Mormon practices might result in terrible pain, however, my husband and I worry for his soul if we do not force him to attend the Mormon church, and believe in our religion. Would anyone happen to have any recommendations or advice?
  22. I need help. I'll keep it brief and simple. Ive been dating this girl and we talk about the future pretty seriously. But there is this other girl that I've been interested in a lot and I can't get my mind off of her. But she's on a mission. She gets back soon which is great. But heres the catch, we live in different states. and my current relationship is also long distance. So its like either way I have to be long distance and won't really know what its like to be with someone unless one of us moves our life for the other. Any thoughts?f
  23. I have a problem and I need some advice. I'm new to this religion and I recently told my mom about it and she let me go to church on Sunday, but after that she started researching the religion and found all of this bad and untrue things about it, so now she won't let me go anymore. What do I do? If I can't go to church, then what should I do? She never really liked Mormons in the first place and it's been a while since I went and I asked her the other day and she said no.
  24. I am giving my mission farewell talk in Sacrament Meeting the day after tomorrow and I need help writing my talk!! I know it seems pretty late to start writing it but I am usually pretty good at writing talks, I just have trouble thinking of what to talk about. My topic is on D&C 4 and how "love qualifies you for the work". I'm honestly not entirely sure what that means! I feel like it means that even if you're not the most qualified or educated person, that if you have a sincere love for the people you're teaching that it doesn't matter and the Spirit will take care of the rest. Does that seem accurate? Any tips on giving a good talk would be appreciated, really!! (scriptures, quotes, etc. are also appreciated) Thank you!
  25. Hello evryone ! im new on but not as a member of the church. Im looking for a partner to work or a nice project. Need animator if you know anyone in the field interested by church topics, let me know Anxious to get to know you all through diverse activities or chats Have a good day! Eric