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Found 9 results

  1. I'm a male teenager who is struggling with masturbation. I've been reading online and the general consensus is that someone with this problem should talk to their bishop. However, I have some questions and concerns. One thing I'm wondering is how to even set up the interview. Do I have to talk to the ward executive secretary and set up a "confession appointment"? Second, I'm terrified of talking to him. I've had this problem for years. In Boyd K. Packer's "To the Young Men Only" it says, "If one of you seems trapped in that, escape. Go to your father or bishop, please." I've talked to my father, but I still haven't gotten over the problem. I would really like to not encounter the bishop if possible, however, I am willing to if it is necessary for repentance. I'm also scared that he will say I can't perform any priesthood duties or partake of the sacrament. But then everyone in the ward will know! I'd like some advice.
  2. I'm an eighteen year old young woman and in the past got into a habit of masturbation, I've since stopped as I want to be worthy to serve a mission. I know that sins regarding the law of chastity should be taken to the bishop and it's not enough to simply stop committing the sin and pray to be forgiven of it, so I fully intend to go to my bishop about this matter not matter how long ago it occurred. However, as a young woman I feel extremely uncomfortable with the idea of blatantly telling my bishop that I've masturbated, no matter how much I trust him. Plus I feel, although I don't think this is rational, that people are more understanding of young men committing sexual sins and as a woman that it is much worse to have committed this sin. Do I have to explicitly have to tell my bishop that my sin is masturbation, or is it enough to tell him that I broke the law of chastity, but specify that I haven't had sex with anyone? Honestly the only thing that is keeping me from having this conversation with my bishop is the dread of having to explain to him that I masturbated.
  3. I'm an Aaronic Priesthood holder and I feel very ashamed right now. Just recently I started masturbation for about...a month, but I desperately want to stop and I realize the consequences. I feel that if I really try hard enough my will power will overcome. I have already began praying about it, and a I am committed to never masturbate again. Am i required to confess to my bishop regarding this sin or is masturbation not severe enough if I can handle it myself? -If I confess will I not be allowed to pass the sacrament, home teach, partake of the sacrament, participate in youth activities, prepare the sacrament, etc? -I know that the bishop is supposed to remain confidential about my confessions, but are my parents an exception? I feel that if he told my parents (because of our unique family situation) it would be harder on me than if I resolved my problem on my own or with the help of JUST the bishop (and Heavenly Father of course). In essence, should I try my hardest to fully repent myself and seek forgiveness and never commit this sin again? Or is it required that masturbation is severe enough that I must confess with my bishop? Please help, thank you.
  4. A couple of years ago I started masturbating, not really knowing what i was doing until I wanted to know what the church thoughts were about it. I read that it was a sin I stopped immediately and prayed for days to be okay with God. I haven't done anything in a year, so I've realized I am not an addict which is good. I haven't thought about going back and a feel fine. I haven't spoken to anyone about it and I really don't want too because I'm not having an addiction like most forums and threads say. I'm just really confused about what I should do because I feel like God has forgiven me but everyone's response is usually go speak to your bishop or something and I really can't do that. I'm the most socially awkward person and if I speak about that past of me I will start bawling because I didn't even know it was wrong. So please can someone help me find out what I should do. By the way I am a mia maid age 14 thank you for reading and help me because I feel alone in this. Also I cant tell my Bishop because I don't trust it will be kept secret. Everything that happens in my ward spreads like wildfire even though I barley know anyone at my ward.
  5. I'm a girl, 18 years old. My first time masturbating I was in 8th grade. It has gradually gotten worse. but i had a boyfriend last year and we messed up and did things we shouldn't and broke up because we couldn't not do stuff when we were together. I repented of those things me and my ex did to the bishop. Also to add the bishop is my father. So once we broke up It was hard not to have urges to want to masturbate. I usually go a few weeks then the temptation arises again. I just want to change. I know I have to repent, but it's my dad I'm telling and how do I tell him I have a problem with masturbating? How would I say it? I know I need the guidance I'm just beyond scared to admit I'm a girl with a problem most girls don't have. I feel disgusted with my self that I've let it go so far. I just need help. So my question is how do I tell my bishop I have a problem with masturbating? What context would I use? Am I the only girl struggling with this?
  6. Hello, it's 1:36 am on a Wednesday (morning?) and I'm coming to you guys in desperation. Let's start this story from the very beginning. To warn you, this will be very "tl;dr", but please read anyway When I was about 7 or 8 years old, I had a friend who introduced me to the world of pornography. Yes, I was really that young. I don't want to blame all of my problems on this, but I would be lying if I said a part of me didn't think that was the source of it. Anyway, after only a couple of times at age 7, I didn't think much of it. I would have weird feelings inside for a long time that I couldn't explain whenever I saw something inappropriate. When I was 12 years old, while looking up Halloween costumes, I saw some very risque costumes. I basically ended up on a website with even more risque things (no nudity, just very risque). I can't even explain to you the tears I shed from this experience. The guilt just ate away at me. I convinced myself this sin wasn't enough to tell the Bishop. I rationalized it, saying that I was only 12, I didn't know better. I made every excuse in my head I could think of. Now, I am 17, and I have ventured into porn. Videos, pictures, ect- although I have done it a small amount of times for the past 5 years (I'd say about 10 different instances, which I guess is a lot... but when you think of it over the span of 5 years, not too much)... but recently, I've just been feeling it lately. The addiction I guess is the feeling. Just the urge, if you will. And I know it's because just about 6 months ago, I masturbated for the first time. The reason I am here is simple. I am DONE. I wouldn't say that I am addicted to porn. I am more than ready to stop this terrible thing. I want to talk to my Bishop so badly and repent and stop the guilt from gnawing at my brain before I sleep (that's exactly what was happening right before I found this site). But I have some reservations. 1) I do NOT want my parents to know. I love and trust my parents dearly, but I just can't disappoint them like this. I know it sounds contradictory, but I love the church. I go to church, read my scrips, go to seminary, say prayers, all of it... but this is just a problem I struggle with. And... I just feel like they don't need to know. I don't want them to get the wrong idea and stop trusting my others siblings who I know do not do this. So, is that okay that I don't tell them? 2) For those who have already confessed things to their bishop: do they look at you differently? I'm sure they do, they must... but... I just don't want people to look down on me for these stupid mistakes I've made. I love my Bishop so much, he's a really great guy. I'm just really scared of disappointment and resentment. 3) For those who have confessed: do you feel like you're completely forgiven? Is the guilt really gone? Because a part of me thinks that this feeling I get will never go away.
  7. When I was young, I had a problem with masturbation. I didn't view pornagraphy, but definitely had a problem. I never told a bishop about it and now, 20 years later, am suddenly wondering if I need to. I have lead a clean, pure life as an active member of the church since then and have not had problems with it since I got married. Is this something that still needs to be confessed? I never even considered confessing at the time because it seemed like a personal weakness. Just wondering if prayer and stopping are enough???
  8. My 6-year-old daugther has been struggling with masturbation for a few years now. I have counseled, taught and helped her in every way I can think, but she still struggles with the addiction. Does anyone have any ideas of how to help her stop. I can find no answers anywhere else, because to the world, masturbation is accepted. Please help me. I'll take any advice I can get.
  9. I just want to thank everybody for their comments. Most were helpful but a few were kind of harsh. To the helpful ones, I hope your insights are not due to first, sceond, or third hand experience. It is not a fun thing to go through. To the harsh ones, let me explain some things for I believe you were al just trying to help but probably misunderstood or misread what I was intending to say. Here is the explanation. I never felt good about my addcitions...never! However, if you know addicitons they are contrary to logic. You feel one way but act another, if that makes sense. When I met this girl I was in the middle of therapy. I still am in therapy. My therapist said that I could not give love until I learned to love myself. He also said that my addicitions would be a major obstacle in giving the energy necessary in a relationship. However, I was asked to date this girl by my parents. My parents don't know any of this by the way. When I started to see her more I realized how much she made me happy. I also saw how lonely she was and how much she needed someone. Her dad just passed away last summer and she moved back to be with her mom. Her only family that stays in touch with her is her mom. Her brothers refuse to talk to her and her mom. Her grandparents refuse to talk to both of them either. She as a few freinds but work and school kind of hinder any real freindships. So when I heard what my therapist said I tried to break it off by telling everything. I told her what my therapist said. I told what I was feeling. To my suprise she pretty much just batted away my faults and doubts about dating her like they were mere flys! I tried to talk to her again and again but she kept changing the subject by saying things like 'I like you the way you are', 'you will change'. She even told me her life story about not being a virgin and falling away from the church and how she came back. She told me this to show me that we all have faults. Yet as I tried to explain to her how my addictions hindered my ability to love or even like her she batted that away. Perplexed and confused I contined to pray for answers. Now some of you mentioned in some form or another that since I had addictions I could not connect with God and recieve answers. That is an outright lie! I hope you don't say that to people. I believe, no I know, that God answers all prayers no matter who it comes from! How would any sinner, addict, lost soul, or prodigal son ever get back on track if that were true? If it were true then why do we need the Atonement? If we can't ask for help and receive it properly then why even ask? Why even try? Do not spread that lie! It will destroy people! Now then, I prayed for guidance and I got only doubts, confusion, and issues bombarding my brain every second of everyday. I finally asked my brother who is an Elder's Quorum 2nd counselor for help. He said I should ask the question 'Should I break off this relationship?"' and see wht happens. He also said that the confusion and doubt was like trying ti tune into a radio station and getting static because I was not in line with what God wanted. So I prayed and prayed and prayed. The answer was clear. I needed to break up with this girl and focus on my myself. I need to love me now. I need to clear the road of my addicitons so I can continue on the path to Heavenly Father. I broke up with her 2 hours ago and I hope she will be ok. I told her what I have told you. Will she be ok? Did I do the right thing? I need to get more support I think. I also need to talk to my bishop. This is where I need some more advice. Should I tell my parents? How do I do that? How will they react? Now some of you mentioned how incredible it was that my priesthood leaders reacted with little or no emotion and were not as strict as you would think. Here in lies the next question. Is this offence punishible by disfellowship or excommunication? I thought that's what they would have done but they didn't. They even let me keep taking the sacrament and continue with my callings!. Is this wrong? How do I tell the new bishop, if the former preisthood leaders were wrong, what should be done? If he does the same as they did what do I do? Do I talk to the stake president or higher authority? I am truly scared of this but I think I should be excommunicated. Is that wrong? I think I told you that I have been keeping up the lie and going to the temple and keeping callings and such. That is why I beleive I should be excommunicated. Are there any bishops on here or ex-bishops or know bishops who could help me out? Like I said I am truly, deeply, extemely mortified and terrified at the thought of excommunication. Not only because of the embarrassment but because I will lose the gift of the Holy Ghost and the blessings I have recieved thus far through the church. Please let me know what the protocol is for bishops dealing with masturbation and pornography. Please let me know how best I should tell my parenst if I should at all. Again thank you all for your support and concern. dashb78