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I'm new to these forums, so forgive me if I don't folow the regular social cues. So a bit of background, I'm 20 years old and just married 2 months ago to the most wonderful man (21). We've know each other for a long time, and I've loved him for every second of it. We're having no relationship issues, we've got through every trial we've had together. But lately I've been getting some strong feelings in my day to day life and when I pray that we should be having children. Don't get me wrong, we both want kids, but we want to wait for the right time, which we thought would be in at least 2-3 years. Right now, we're just not in a good position for it. We're really low on money, both looking for new jobs (he is working, I am not), struggling to figure out how we're both going to go back to college, and still getting used to being married. I know I should bring it up with him, but I don't know how. I've always been able to tell him everything, but I think that having kids right now scares me, and the fact that it almost seems like the right thing to do scares me even more. So I guess I'm just looking for advice. Has anyone been in a situation like this before? What did you do? Did it work out? I want to trust in God, and it seems like these feelings are from God, but logically it seems so wrong.
After reading some of the threads here on natural birth, I'm surprised no one mentioned using a doula alongside their midwife. From my understanding, the midwife and doula play very different roles, with only one common ground of being present at your birthing. The role of "midwife" primarily focuses on delivering the baby. While there are exceptions, traditionally, this is the main duty of midwifery. The role of "doula" is to be a confidante, emotional and physical support before and after birthing. They are an ideal addition to any natural birth experience for several reasons: they may spend additional time with the new mother without time constraints after delivery to assist with anxieties, calming techniques and breastfeeding when the midwife may be scheduled elsewhere. I've also read that having a doula may be a cultural thing, and some women may not deem it necessary to have one during their labour and delivery. But after joining a natural birth site, it seems that the majority of women on there recommend having BOTH a midwife accompanied by a doula. I'm thinking (and I know it's very early at this point) that if I do in fact go the natural route and use a midwife, I will want a doula as well. I've heard reputable and experienced doulas cost near to $1000 for a birth. So it's definitely a little something extra on the side. Have any of you mommas on here used a doula?