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I am a new member who is discussing marriage with my current boyfriend who is a member. He is civilly divorced with 1 child. He is still sealed to his ex wife. I have some questions and concerns about the fact that he can't unseal from his ex wife. Everything I read online is very conflicting. Some say he can unseal, some say no, some say he needs permission from his ex wife, some say one of them needed to either be abusive or commit adultery for an unsealing. I have also read that if he gets a 'clearance' and we are married in the temple, then I will only be married to him for a time and he will be with his ex wife for eternity. This is bothersome to hear, as I wish to be with him for eternity and for any children we have to be with him as well. I have also read that a lot of people don't understand the feelings of a 2nd wife being concerned about him being sealed to two women and for the 1st wife to keep the blessings when she broke the covenant of remaining married to her husband. It is not natural for any woman to feel comfortable with the thought of their husband being tied (married, sealed, connected) with two women for eternity. Forgive me, but isn't multiple marriages no longer practiced and accepted within the church? Also, if the ex wife wishes to be with him for eternity and they are still sealed, but he wants to be with me and not her, who does God say yes to? He can't say yes to both. Everyone says, God will not force you to be with someone but how does that work when she is asking God to be with him? If she asks to be rejoined to her ex husband, am I then cast aside? If the ex wife and my boyfriend never get back together, then they are breaking their covenant under God and therefore, how would she receive the highest blessings by remaining sealed to him? All of this is very confusing and disheartening. I am still learning and don't fully comprehend scripture on this matter. Any insight and clarification would be appreciated. Especially from any woman who deals with the hard place of 2nd wife. Thank you!

Hey guys! So right now I’m in the process of trying to get married. My fiancé is divorced and was married in the temple over a year ago - BUT the sealing has been canceled and she is already remarried in the temple. We submitted our request for our sealing clearance over a month ago and I haven’t heard anything yet. I’ve tried asking my bishop and even calling church headquarters and still have gotten no kind of answers as to how long it may take. I had thought maybe we were going to get lucky and not have to wait a super long time because of the sealing already being cancelled, but I’m starting to think not so much. If anyone has any experience with this I would love to hear from you. Thanks!!

my husband and i have been married almost a year now. he was sealed to his first wife but i wasnt sealed to my first husband. his ex is completely crazy, involved in drug use and distribution, is sexually active with multiple people she wasnt married to, drinks & smokes, has been convicted of child abuse and neglect and, no big surprise, became completely inactive. but before she dove into the crazy pool, she had 3 wonderful kiddos with my husband. (all of which i am raising full time since we have full custody and she only gets limited and supervised visitation) my husband is seaking a cancellation at my request because i cringe at the idea of being with her in eternity. i am a convert of 2 years now and i know i dont have all the answers, so if this is wrong, please educate me! is it wrong of me to not want to be sealed to him while he is sealed to her? and what are the chances they wont grant the cancellation? his ex is also severly ill. (lupus that has lead to kidney and heart failure and diabetes apparently) i feel so torn on the issue! i desperately want to be sealed to my husband, but the questions about his ex are overwhelming me. what if she gets her act together and we are both sealed to him? is there some way she could work out her salvation after death? as in...if she dies living the way she is now and still sealed to my husband, could she somehow work out her awful choices on earth and become worthy to enter the celestial kingdom? therefore ending up with us in eternity? i am kinda banking on, if we are only granted a clearance and they wont grant a cancellation of his sealing to her, her not living worthily to enter the celestial kingdom. nut can she reverse that after she dies? i am soooo confused! and all my bishop and husband can say is "have faith. there is order in heaven and Heavenly Father is just." but i know the verses about that which is bound on earth shall be bound in heaven. how do i take the words of men over the scriptures?