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Found 10 results

  1. The only summary I have for this one is: WE CAN RECOVER FROM OUR SINS.
  2. Recently I was in a meeting with 10 people including the bishop. Without going into too many details, this meeting right from the start took a different direction than I expected. And then at one point the bishop wanted opinions and advice about something. He specifically called on certain people to give their advice. I raised my hand but was ignored. One time I started talking but was interrupted. I'm trying to not take this personally. I'm feeling like I don't matter and that my bishop doesn't trust me. I have respect for the people that were in the meeting but have replayed how things went and it's frustrating to me. I'm wondering if I should speak to my bishop or just let it go? I have been feeling vulnerable because of other unrelated things in my life and now I feel even worse. Any advice?
  3. Often, when abusers or cheaters request forgiveness, they insinuate that if we are real Christ-followers we would "forgive and forget." I contend that we forgive--meaning we turn over our right to revenge to God. We hold no grudge, and wish no malice. However, forgetting is something that only God is in a position to do. Only He is all-powerful and all-knowing. So, only God is in a position not to be taken advantage of. God does not need the memory of our past sins to help him know our spirits. So, He is able to truly cast our sins as far as the east is from the west. The forgiveness we extend should never be forced. It should never be perceived as diminishing the hurt and the offense. And, it should never result in victims reentering toxic relationships. Forgiveness is not trust. Trust may or may not be regained. When it does come, the journey should be gradual--paced by the victim. Thoughts?
  4. I don't know where to go from here. I'm praying daily for strength and guidance. My husband has been involved in pornography our entire marriage. He hid it for several months after we married and when I discovered it I was devastated. I'm past Satan's lies that it had to do with me or that "all men do it". I just don't know that I can ever trust him or respect him again. I can't take the hurt, anger, and fear anymore. The negative emotions are so intense I don't think I can peel them away to feel love again. Just when I think I've let go and can trust I discover more. He has worked with multiple bishops, but they were of no help. He'd get at most a few months of not taking the sacrament. I feel he's just gone through the motions and pretended to quit and faked change. I understand mistakes, but this has happened over and over. Years ago, he "supposedly" quit to perform baby blessings (first his nephew, one our 1st baby). With my second baby, I discovered that he looked at porn a few days before the blessing. We've been inactive on and off. I'm no saint, but I do expect honesty and intimacy in my marriage. We were sealed in the temple while I was pregnant with my 3rd baby, and I remember feeling such a disconnect with him and lack of the spirit- I had a strong feeling he wasn't worthy. Another baby blessing and my oldest's baptism, all while hiding the truth that he was still looking at porn on a consistent basis. 13 years of catching and discovering the porn and then with my 4th baby I find more porn (second trimester having moved a few weeks before). Another discovery of porn 2 days before her baby blessing. I told him he wasn't worthy to bless her and I didn't want him to. After much thought and prayer I told him he could decide if he was going to still bless her and the night before her blessing he said he was going to. (My mother was in town) So, what I thought was a problem for him, has turned out to be a major problem that is never resolved and has not been sporadic or bingeing, but a consistent ongoing problem. (Weekly) He wants to baptize our daughter, who has waited a year. He says he's been clean 6 months. The bishop said he's good to go and can also start taking the sacrament and I feel AWFUL. This is so counterintuitive. It is what it is. I haven't seen repentance/change and it makes me sick inside to think I'm repeating the past with him. I feel much guilt over the fact that I can't seem to forgive or trust, and that I look back at ordinances he's performed with such sadness. He has fought me on my boundaries and needs, pushes me away, and truthfully I feel the "actions" he has taken to stop accessing porn I forced on him. He quit the therapy I asked him to start. He hasn't done what the original bishop and the new bishop asked him to do. I just don't understand how this has been handled correctly. This is how he has fallen back into it before. I can't let this cycle continue. I feel I might be leaving this marriage. I've tried, I've stood by him for 13 years hoping he'd change. I took my vows and covenants seriously, but I cannot disrespect myself and hurt like this anymore.
  5. Let's discuss doubt. It seems quite trendy, in some circles, to embrace doubt as some sort of virtue. What are your thoughts on doubt?
  6. Husband and I are planning on moving soon (renting). Two years ago, we left our washer and dryer in our condo when a friend who was moving in next asked if he could use them since our new place provided a washer and dryer. We said "okay". Well, today I decided to look into getting those back. This friend's mother, with whom I've always been very close, is now in possession of them and is refusing to return them. She has a whole list of reasons why she and her son get to keep them. Yeah, they are in possession of them and it was a dumb move on our parts to let someone else have these appliances and what's done is done and all that, but... I don't think I'll ever speak to anyone in that family again. I know I'll forgive them, certainly--I really do intend to just let this go. But this action, this breaking of trust, is costing them their relationship with me and my family. Now, I feel silly over what this is over. It is just a washer and dryer and not an expensive set at that. So much worse has happened between people. Am I being petty by saying "Okay, keep the washer and dryer, but we're done?" What would you do?
  7. I have been dating a girl for almost 6 months now and things started off amazing. After a couple of months in we began to have issues with the law of chastity (heavy petting) and we got that cleared up with our bishops and then things got better after that. Recently we have began to have some issues with touching each others butts under clothing and I touch her boobs under clothing as well when we are making out. Sometimes I'm the one that initiates and other times it's her so it goes both ways. I have been hurt and so has she but with my kind of personality how I see it is to forgive and then work towards proving that it wont happen again. She has a lot harder time forgiving me because she says that if I truly loved her that I wouldn't do it to her. She has started to work through some depression that she has had since she's been home from her mission and she says that I shouldn't put her this kind of thing since she is going through that. I haven't intentionally tried to do any of this and I haven't intentionally gone into a situation with it on my mind to do these things. What can I say/do to help her understand that I do love her and that it wont happen again? She's taking some time to think things out but I need to know how I can help her realize that I'm sincere in my apology and that I will do everything it takes to make it right.
  8. A non-Christian supportive friend/Alanon sponsor told me in person to try to see the world through God's eyes. A few days later, she emailed, "Let me know when God has helped you see the world through his eyes, even if it only lasts for moments, it will be trans-formative." While I understand the positive spirit in which she meant it, my first thought is that I can't possibly. I'm not knowledgeable, experienced, powerful, wise, or qualified to even come close to His infinite way of viewing & interpreting the world, let alone regarding the complex trials which triggered the conversation. I can do my best to discern how He might see things, based on my limited knowledge of good and evil. But . . . To ask for such vision, test faith by trying, based on a pretense that I might understand as He does, or imagine I can judge anything on an equal level with God--seems to me to be the opposite of having a humble spirit and a contrite heart. I believe I need to trust that he sees and knows all, infinitely beyond my capacity. I don't think it's my place to question His reason, knowledge, wisdom and will. Those mysteries are not mine to understand in this life. Instead, I think I must trust that He holds the keys, and the details are none of my business. I Googled the phrase & found it to be used in the Evangelical revival population. Can anyone comment with suggestions about how I might best reply on this topic--by sharing gospel principles, without offending or arguing religion? Or am I taking it too literal over-analyzing? Hope to get replies soon. Thanks!
  9. I am having a hard time moving forward and forgiving my husband. He has been secretively been viewing porn and lusting after women in his day to day life for the last 10 years and I found out a couple of months ago. I believe that he is sincerely sorry and is moving away from this behavior and I know I need to forgive him but I am so stubborn and hurt I am can't get myself to do it. The negative memories from the past when I thought that this was going on and he denied it are all coming back. I don't know how to just forgive and forget all the hurt and lies that I have experienced. Has anyone been in this situation or have any advice for me? thanks
  10. I've been studying Preach my Gospel and i came to the Recognizing the spirit section and that has been extremely good for me because thats what im trying to learn. anyway then i came to relying on the spirit, and i realized how hard that is or can be even without realizing it or thinking that you are. i think in the world today we hold ourselves back so much with so many people and put up a wall or sheild so to speak against things that we sometimes ourselves dont even see it. and i've come to realize i've even had that in my relationship with Our Savior, i looked up the word Rely in the Dictionary and i came up with: Depend on with full trust of confidence, to be Dependent on. i realized that i haven't been doing that and at the times the spirit tries to talk to me I'm the one blocking that communication, the Lord isn't its not a punishment or anything, its just me putting up an invisible barrier that i didn't know i was building. so i've came up with a goal, i realize i rely on my friends, on my family, as i should the spirit, when a member of my family says they will pick me up at a certain time. i depend on that i rely on that. an example as simple as that. we know that person is coming to pick us up, we have confidence they're coming. it should be that real, that easy and simple relying on the spirt. : ) i dunno i just kind of realized this for myself and it is a tough goal to work on for me, but i'll accomplish it through prayer and opening my heart and trust a little wider than i knew i could :) what are your thoughts of Relying on the Spirit?