How would this sealing work?

[MsLadybug]

Hi! I hope someone may have some advice from experience that may help me. I have been married to an ex-member for over 6 years. (He was ex-communicated before we met). We have been separated for almost a year now and as things are now, there isn't much hope of a reconciliation. We have one child together, our son, who is 4. After a very difficult marriage, and my inactivity for several years, I have become active once again. I feel strongly that if my husband could turn to Heavenly Father, that our marriage could be saved, but the likelyhood of that happening is slim to none. Neither one of us has the means to get a divorce and really, neither one of us is pursuing that yet. And one other important piece of information--his parents(my son's grandparents) are Temple worthy and recommend holders and are faithful and support me wholeheartedly in raising my son in the Church.

So my question is this: I have felt the Spirit instill in me the need to be sealed to our son. So I'm working on my personal worthiness. But my mother-in-law once mentioned that when the father isn't available (ie my husband) that the sealing can occur through the father's line. I believe that she was saying that I could be sealed to them, and our son to me. But I'm not sure of that.

Any advice? Any comments? Is there any way at all I can be sealed to my son in the event that I get divorced, without re-marrying? I don't really want to seal my son to another man. Is there a way to get sealed to him without my husband, before a divorce becomes a reality? This keeps me up at night.

[Kirajo]

Ask your bishop for now. But i did read a neat quote not to worry and run around frantic about who will be sealed to who and who is going to be married and who isnt right now. We will have time to sort things out accordingly in the next life.

[Hemidakota]

MsLadybug...reminds of the CGI movie. Nice forum name.

Have your local Bishop read page 87 of the General Handbook [sealing Children to Parents]. This is an interesting case since the church does require a stepfather be the other parent and requires a custody signed document from the original father to allow it. This may require the First Presidency to grant this since there is no father figure.

What the chapter spells out for this case, a living child who was born out of covenant, may be sealed to one natural parent and a stepparent, when the parent has legal custody and the other patent gives signed consent. Remember, a court degree granting legal custody is not sufficient clearance for a sealing.

[siouxz72]

Hemi,

Why wouldn't her son be able to be sealed to just her if she is temple worthy and the father is not and there's no hope for him to be any time in the forseeable (sp) future?

siouxz

[Hemidakota]

FATHER [male piresthood holder] figure head is required based on church policy. I haven't seen any Sealings in church just to women due to non-temple divorces. This is why the bishops need to clear this through the First Presidency.

[Truegrits]

I have questioned this also. I know LDS women both single, and married to non LDS who wonder why their children cannot be sealed to THEM. Not every Temple worthy female has the "partner" required for sealing. It seems unfair to deny them the blessing of being sealed to their children.

I know that things will get "straightened out" later...but just do not understand why mothers cannot have their children, in this life.??

[beefche]

I have questioned this also. I know LDS women both single, and married to non LDS who wonder why their children cannot be sealed to THEM. Not every Temple worthy female has the "partner" required for sealing. It seems unfair to deny them the blessing of being sealed to their children.

I know that things will get "straightened out" later...but just do not understand why mothers cannot have their children, in this life.??

I don't understand what you mean by "have their children in this life." A sealing is not about possessions. I am a single woman who has never married. My parents are not members. I am not sealed to anyone. I know that being sealed to a family is essential for the highest level of CK and I am confident that the Lord has made provisions for me and others (like the OP). He knew that there were would be less than ideal situations happening in this life.

[siouxz72]

Thanks Hemi! You answered my question.

[Hemidakota]

There are some helpful hints that may shed some further light from an Ensign Article "Marriage in the Lord’s Way, Part One, By Elder Cree-L Kofford Of the Seventy

Importance of the Sealing Ordinance

We learn from a revelation received by the Prophet Joseph Smith that the sealing ordinance, which eternally unites man and woman, is a requirement for exaltation, which means living with God our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ His Son in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom, where the power for continuing to extend the family throughout eternity is present. That revelation, found in section 131 of the Doctrine and Covenants, reads as follows:

"In the celestial glory there are three heavens or degrees;

"And in order to obtain the highest, a man must enter into this order of the priesthood [meaning the new and everlasting covenant of marriage];

"And if he does not, he cannot obtain it.

"He may enter into the other, but that is the end of his kingdom; he cannot have an increase" (D&C 131:1-4).

Many people reading this section of the Doctrine and Covenants do not grasp its full import. Accordingly, I thought both of you might benefit from a brief comment or two about its meaning. The gospel, which is called "the new and everlasting covenant," includes many specific covenants, one being called "the new and everlasting covenant of marriage." This title, or name, is simply another way of saying "patriarchal order." Thus, that portion of section 131 could read: "And in order to obtain the highest, a man must enter into the patriarchal order of the priesthood."

The patriarchal order refers to priesthood government by family organization. It originated in the time of Adam and extended down to the days of Moses, when that order was withdrawn (see Joseph Fielding Smith, Doctrines of Salvation [1956], 3:83-84). It has been restored in our day and time (see D&C 110). You will want to know that the city of Enoch, which because of its righteousness was taken into heaven, was also established on the patriarchal order (see Harold B. Lee, Stand Ye in Holy Places [1974], 271).

Furthermore, we learn that "the highest order of the Melchizedek Priesthood is patriarchal authority" and that "the patriarchal order of the priesthood is the right of worthy priesthood-holding fathers to preside over their descendants through all ages; it includes the ordinances and blessings of the fulness of the priesthood shared by husbands and wives who are sealed in the temple" (in Daniel H. Ludlow, ed., Encyclopedia of Mormonism, 5 vols. [1992], 3:1067, 1135).

The Lord has told us that the patriarchal order will be the order of things in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom; thus, without participation in the sealing ordinance, you simply cannot qualify for admission to that high and holy place. Of course, some individuals, through no fault of their own, may not have the opportunity to marry in this life; they will yet have that opportunity (see Harold B. Lee, The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, ed. Clyde G. Williams [1996], 256-57).

Perhaps now you can see why I prefer to use the term "sealing ordinance"; it is more—so much more—than what the term marriage suggests to most.

I hope you have both begun to grasp the tremendous depth of the sealing ordinance and the significance attached to it. Can you now begin to understand why my heart weeps for those people who say they can’t see much difference between this magnificent ordinance and the "fool’s gold" of a civil marriage? [Ensign, June 1998, 7]

[Truegrits]

I don't understand what you mean by "have their children in this life."

I am saying 'sealed to them'...

[ruthiechan]

You have to have a worthy Priesthood holder as a husband in order for your son to be sealed to you. Until that happens you can not be sealed to him.

Definitely talk to your Bishop about it. Though I doubt exceptions will be made, maybe he can give you the strength you need to deal with this.

I know it hurts not to have your son sealed to you. My daughter is not sealed to me because I chose to marry someone who is not a member of the church.

Have faith and trust in the Lord. If you live righteously and teach your son righteously in the end all things will work out and you shall have your reward.

[Maureen]

Coming from someone who is non-LDS; I'm guessing the main ingredient to being "sealed" is marriage. Marriage connects the sealing process, so to speak. If there is no marriage between a man and woman, there is no sealing.