Role Play..I felt uncomfortable..

[pushka]

Tonight when the Missionaries came to teach me my New Member lesson, they chose to do some role play...1st I had to ask them questions about the church, any aspect of it, and they had to give me the answers, then they had to ask me and the other person in the room (an older member of the church who's been a member for years) questions and we had to give them the answers.

I know that the purpose of this was to enable me to answer questions that non-members might come up with, but it all felt a little uncomfortable..like I had to sort of rehearse set answers, and as if I was being tested on my knowledge since being Baptised. A friend of mine had this particular lesson some weeks ago, and the sister who sat in on the session told me afterwards that the Missionaries were surprised at how little this person knew about the Gospel, the Joseph Smith story etc.

How do you feel about these role playing lessons? Have you, as a recent Missionary had to conduct this lesson with others?

Next week they are returning to continue the role play, I think they felt that the older member answered too many of their questions tonight, to be honest I did have some answers ready to give but he just got in there faster than I did!! Also, having got started asking questions as a non-member might got me thinking of all sorts of questions I could ask, but was afraid that the Missionaries either wouldn't have been able to give me satisfactory answers to, or that might be a little too controversial, so I didn't really feel comfortable with the session. I did tell them that I felt much more comfortable answering questions of 'real' non-member friends and family because I knew how they generally felt about the church and how to tailor my replies so that they would be more genuine..tonight I just felt like I was being quizzed.

I've been asked to read Alma 17 before they come around next week, I suppose I ought to be reading Preach My Gospel too, as they have been 'promoting' that as an aid to member-missionary work, as they want me to role play sharing the Gospel with somebody next time they call...

[BenRaines]

The book Preach My Gospel is a great study guide for missionaries and members alike. It provides answers to many basic questions.

If the missionaries ask a question and you don't know the answer, to me, it would be a sign that the missionaries that taught you did not do a very good job, not a reflection on you.

Missionaries should not be asking you something you have not already been taught.

Ben Raines

[pushka]

Thanks Ben, it wasn't so much that they asked me questions I hadn't been taught about, it was more that the guy who was sitting in on the lesson with us sort of took over when they didn't look directly at me when asking a particular question, and I didn't feel confident enough to interrupt him with whatever I was going to say..also, when they asked if I thought either the BOM or The Bible was more important than the other, I said that, to me, they were equal to each other, but I didn't really know if that was the 'correct' reply, or whether I ought to have said that the BOM was the more correct of the two because of the history of lots of translations of the Bible over the years, books removed etc..so perhaps some of the questions they asked were a little too similar to each other, and I wasn't sure that the answers I gave were varied enough, particularly in regard to the BOM which I haven't yet fully read..

[a-train]

Actual practice is something that is helpful for the newbie, but don't get to thinking that there should be any certain wording or precise script.

The truth is, if a person is simply testing your knowledge, then they are searching you and not the LORD. Our work as missionaries doing compassionate service is not to offer all the answers, but to direct all men to the Real Source of Truth. That is the true mission we must perform as testifiers of Jesus Christ.

-a-train

[pushka]

Thanks a-train..I agree that reading and re-reading Preach My Gospel and other literature, and studying them is really useful..

I think the reason I felt as if I was being tested was because of the comments the other Sister made regarding my friend's Role Play lesson..perhaps she shouldn't have shared her comments with me, as it made me feel as if her husband, the guy who accompanied the Missionaries in my lesson tonight, might have gone home to her and 'scored' me on my given answers..

I understand the 'teaching by the Spirit', and felt that this is what I would be doing in realistic circumstances, perhaps knowing that the Missionaries already knew the 'correct' replies (not parrot fashion, of course), put more pressure on me to be correct and perhaps I was searching for more positive re-inforcement that the replies I gave were okay..maybe I should just have a chat with the Missionaries about how I felt following the lesson, before they come to teach me and continue with the role play next week..

[BenRaines]

I would say that the books are of equal importance. Book of Mormon is "another witness of Jesus Christ." Must have the first to have another :)

Ben Raines

[a-train]

And he may HAVE gone home and graded you. But whatever score he gave is worthless. Whether an F- or an A+, his esteem is valueless and the lesson to be learned is that we need not fear man more than God.

-a-train

[Traveler]

Tonight when the Missionaries came to teach me my New Member lesson, they chose to do some role play...1st I had to ask them questions about the church, any aspect of it, and they had to give me the answers, then they had to ask me and the other person in the room (an older member of the church who's been a member for years) questions and we had to give them the answers.

I know that the purpose of this was to enable me to answer questions that non-members might come up with, but it all felt a little uncomfortable..like I had to sort of rehearse set answers, and as if I was being tested on my knowledge since being Baptised. A friend of mine had this particular lesson some weeks ago, and the sister who sat in on the session told me afterwards that the Missionaries were surprised at how little this person knew about the Gospel, the Joseph Smith story etc.

How do you feel about these role playing lessons? Have you, as a recent Missionary had to conduct this lesson with others?

Next week they are returning to continue the role play, I think they felt that the older member answered too many of their questions tonight, to be honest I did have some answers ready to give but he just got in there faster than I did!! Also, having got started asking questions as a non-member might got me thinking of all sorts of questions I could ask, but was afraid that the Missionaries either wouldn't have been able to give me satisfactory answers to, or that might be a little too controversial, so I didn't really feel comfortable with the session. I did tell them that I felt much more comfortable answering questions of 'real' non-member friends and family because I knew how they generally felt about the church and how to tailor my replies so that they would be more genuine..tonight I just felt like I was being quizzed.

I've been asked to read Alma 17 before they come around next week, I suppose I ought to be reading Preach My Gospel too, as they have been 'promoting' that as an aid to member-missionary work, as they want me to role play sharing the Gospel with somebody next time they call...

A very important part of teaching is assessing what the student knows. Most students are unconfortable in being assesed - our society has made testing a means of ordering peoples abilities rather than the success of teachers.

You may be uncomfortable but not to worry - You will not get a grade and you do not have to pass to get into heaven (C kingdom).

The Traveler

[skippy740]

Okay, let's set the record straight. The issue isn't and wasn't YOU.

The issue is with the member that accompanied the missionaries.

Here's my guess: They probably felt embarrassed themselves for how this "role play" went. Members are to accompany missionaries for the purposes of bearing testimony and fellowship.

It is all about sharing and feeling the spirit (at least that's what it's SUPPOSED to be about). Yes, you'll want to know correct reasoning behind certain questions and ask yourself if you believe in the answers they give you. You can pray about the answers they give you to gain your own testimony.

Don't worry about this. The questions to become baptised aren't "multiple choice". They are questions about faith, testimony and lifestyle. There isn't any kind of "minimum Mormon knowledge" exam that must be passed (for your salvation).

Missionaries deal with certain kinds of gospel opposition all the time. I think they'd like to be sure that you have the tools and knowledge available to help you build your testimony and share it without feeling ashamed of your faith.

Keep reading the Book of Mormon, praying and share your concerns with the missionaries. If you felt an issue with the last appointment -- TELL THEM. Without communication, this is where barriers to the truth happen. This can be when you feel "ashamed" that "you don't know as much as so-and-so, so why bother?"

You know enough to follow the Spirit and become a member of Christ's church. That's what you need to know and hang on to.

There are 3 aspects to spirituality: Studying, practicing & teaching. "Practicing" is your lifestyle. "Studying" is reading and delving deeper into the gospel. "Teaching" is what you do by example and by your words.

I hope this has helped some!

[Misshalfway]

Hi Pushka. This sounds like a case of good intensions gone weird. I wouldn't worry much about it....and if they want to do it again maybe you could say "Don't like this approach. Could we try something else??"

[dazed-and-confused]

hi pushka....i know how you feel...when i became a member i had similar feelings...and i agree with misshalfway..good intentions gone weird...dont worry...questions are answered in time...personally, i dont worry about anyone thinking they may know more about the gospel than i do...we all learn at our own pace...and as far as the rehearsed answers go...i felt that too as a new member...you'll get it though...with your own experiences in the church....welcome

[Dale]

Role play situations can have some value. I do think that pretending to be a member of another denomination can be a good or bad thing. I like mentally pretending to dialogue with members of different faiths based on reading their literature. I find answers pop into my mind when i get asked stuff. But i pretend to talk to pretend Baptists reading their own stuff so the real ones i meet tend to be more like my pretend ones. But if you filter a pretend Baptist you construct via your own literature then your baptist won't be a match for dialogue with a real one.

I am not LDS, but Reorganized LDS. LDS consider my small denomination apostate. A separate post on this board discusses LDS and RLDS differences. We split from the LDS Church in the 1840's. To not get off topic their is a separate post on my church elsewhere on this board.

But i had this guy try and witness to me using all sorts of Anti-resoration trivia. FAIR and its FAIR Wiki were two resources among others i thank for helping me to answer questions. LDS FAIR Apologetics Homepage But i think of FAIR as my best LDS resource that has helped me survive such experiences with my pride intact.

FAIR has a great You Tube Channel. They just are close to releasing a new film entitled Bible vs. The Book of Mormon. I saw an advanced copy and it makes the Book of Mormon look very good. If i understand right they will soon put it on their channel free to watch. But i am hoping for FAIR selling a DVD, so i can buy a stack of copies. It was done by LDS scholars to respond to an Anti-Mormon film from 2005. I pretend to dialogue with myself when watching apologetic films so i learn answers.

[Brenton]

Hi Pushka. This sounds like a case of good intensions gone weird. I wouldn't worry much about it....and if they want to do it again maybe you could say "Don't like this approach. Could we try something else??"

Yeah, basically; if you feel uncomfortable with something, stop.

I think that's a basic rule-of-thumb with most everything in life.

[WANDERER]

Ask them to roleplay it for you first...one missionary answering the questions and one asking (get the one you feel most comfortable with to be the question asker...I'll bet the other one has great answers: nothing like capitalising on strengths)...and then you take your turn and repeat it word for word more or less. That way you can focus not on being graded...but practicing. Take it one question at a time. This would take the stress out of things...and the same lesson would be taught. I don't think they could object to you wanting to be diligent about being as correct as possible...you're only learning?!?

[pushka]

Wow! I just went back and thanked you all for your comments, they really were useful.

It took me a while last night, to post this thread, because I felt so bad about what the session opened up for me. Being an ex Roman Catholic I found it difficult to reason that Joseph Smith and currently Thomas S Monson were Prophets, but that the R.C. Pope could not be..I still find myself trying to defend the R.C. church to some degree...I think I feel guilty for leaving that church, my whole family ancestry (that I know of) is based around the RCC, so I felt like I'd betrayed them when I was baptised LDS..so the fact that I was asking questions as if I was a non-member of the LDS church made me feel I had to ask the questions a R.C. would be asking, and I felt as if I could have delved a lot more into the questions in that respect, but that that wasn't quite the purpose of the exercise. I felt as if the purpose of the exercise was to be able to give simple, yet thorough answers to simple questions about the basics of the church..so it wasn't really that 'realistic' to me..

Skippy, I think you might be right about the Missionaries feeling embarrassed about how the session went. Originally they were asking me the questions, such as the ones comparing the BOM and Bible, and what relevance the BOM had to us today, and about what the BOM was..ie. a record of the Nephites etc. as well as being a book to explain doctrine more clearly and a Testament of Jesus, but when they turned to questions such as the Nature of God..the attitude of the church to the Trinity etc. this is where they didn't question me directly and so the fellowshipper with us jumped in with his own, very detailed answer, so I wonder whether they thought that I might not know the answer to those sorts of questions? I suppose I felt a little redundant once the fellowshipper started to answer questions, because his replies were so detailed and mine, up to that point had been so simple and short, lol.

I will definitely have a talk with the Missionaries about the session, so that I feel more comfortable about it next week. I do appreciate the efforts to prepare new members for any negative questions they may receive from non-members once they've been baptised, and I'm really grateful to all of you for considering my thoughts and commenting on them so helpfully! Thank You :)

[MorningStar]

I don't think role playing ever makes me feel comfortable. It might be good practice, but I have a hard time taking it seriously until I'm in a situation for real.

Years ago when I was in a singles' ward, we had our visiting teaching conference and they had two sisters get up and demonstrate with the sister they taught how to visit teach properly, even going as far as having a prayer for her. It was very odd to me, but my sister-in-law said they did stuff like that in the MTC.

[pushka]

That was the way I felt, Morninstar, that it wasn't real enough..when I said I felt more comfortable speaking to 'real' people as opposed to somebody pretending to be a non-member the emphasis was jokingly changed to 'how does it feel to not be a 'real' person Elder..?' which made me feel even more uncomfortable about it..I suppose I've always been a little self conscious and perhaps this was coming into play too yesterday..

[Dale]

The only caution is LDS missionaries have frequently no extensive apologetics (defense of their faith), or comparative religions training. So role play sessions may get you some crummy answers. They may give you good answers, but without hearing the actual role play i cannot tell.

My main concern is Bible proof texts used to support beliefs i have in common with LDS. I had Evangelicals accuse me of twisting scripture, and gave me what they thought was the true meaning of the Bible verse. And i had to learn how to respond and defend my use of proof texts. Isa.29 is used as Book of Mormon support and critics developed a few arguments to say i can't properly do that. I decided i can so do that, but i adjusted my use of the scripture to take into account their concerns.

With Roman Catholics i know of an online copy of a debate between a smart Catholic and smart Mormon defender. The Catholics name was Steven or Steve Clifford if i recall right. Through FAIRS links section find Barry Bickmores LDS early Christianity and Mormonism website. They did a written discussion of their religious differences back and forth.

As one who has been witnessed to by scores of Evangelicals i do not know of any of their points that an answer does not exist. Not all answers are equally very good, but research has been done on all the topics. FAIR was very bright in creating the FAIR Wiki as it brings many answers together to more easily find.

[pushka]

Hi Dale, thanks for the suggestion of searching FAIRS links to find the Roman Catholic vs Mormon debate, I would be very interested in reading that..

I was very mindful yesterday about the amount of knowledge that the Missionaries were likely to have, or not have, in certain aspects of the church, that is why I felt like I couldn't ask deeper questions which I may have asked if I'd been a genuine non-member challenging the church..I felt it might have been a little unfair to do that to them and they might have thought I was being a little too negative, lol :)

[rameumptom]

Pushka,

You will find that the missionaries are, well, 19 year old guys teaching from their 19 year old perspective. They will give basic answers, but use some caution on questions that they may ask outside of the Preach My Gospel, because they can be wrong on certain things.

For instance, the Pope IS inspired to lead the Catholic people. He is led by the light of Christ to do a good work, if he seeks for that light. However, the living prophets and apostles have additional authority and revelatory inspiration that the Pope does not have access to. We can look at it on the level of Moses and Aaron. Both were men of God that did what God wanted, but only Moses saw God's face and had the higher responsibilities of the Melchizedek Priesthood, while Aaron had the Aaronic Priesthood and lesser light and truth to share.

19 year old missionaries may not understand the role God has for the Pope in this life, and may not realize he can also receive inspiration from God to a certain level.

I suggest that the elders should limit the role playing with you, except for questions that can be directly answered from Preach My Gospel. If the answers are in there, then they should be able to ask it. If they become nuanced and start asking questions all over the place, then they are going outside the bounds of their calling.

[pushka]

Thanks for your perspective on the Pope vs LDS Prophets Rameumpton...I agree with your comments regarding the Missionaries too..thank you :)

[Moksha]

Pushka, I never feel bad to give an "I don't know" answer to a question. After all, Socrates did this and he was the wisest man in Athens. Just don't drink the hemlock!

After reading these forums for several years, I imagine all of us could ask questions that would both stump and fluster the young missionaries. Good thing we don't want to do it. Leave those tough ones to people like Dr. Daniel C. Peterson, who get paid to grapple with those type of questions.

I was just thinking it would be more fun to role play characters from Austin Powers. Anyway, next time just take a deep cleansing breath and smile like the Buddha before answering the question.

[Iggy]

I can not see what good the Role Playing is for new members. Especially with the missionaries doing it. Role playing would be something the missionaries would do amongst the other missionaries so that they will be better prepared when they tract.

I think I would ask them where they got this idea? Me thinks it is something they did at one of their meetings, and it is really not intended for them to recreate with New Members or Investigators.

Pushka are you taking the New Member lessons? It should be taught by the Ward Missionaries or even a ward member. You should also be going to Gospel Principles class - which I think you are/have already.

Why are you still seeing the Missionaries? Basically their "job" is done. Now it is time for them to move on, and for you to "Graduate" into the mainstream membership.

You have a calling I believe- actually you are doing great, pretty much the same as when I reactivated, only I didn't take the Gospel Principles class - my 'itty bitty Branch didn't have a teacher, and the Stake Senior Missionaries were overloaded and couldn't teach it to me.

So I got the book and taught myself. I got to church a half hour early every Sunday and took my questions to the Branch 1st Councilor . He would call me on Wednesday - late afternoon to see how I was doing with my "lessons".

There were times when I would sit on my porch after a conversation with him, and just cry. Not because I was sad, but because I knew that the members of that 'itty bitty Branch loved me as much as Heavenly Father loved me. It had been over 20 years since others had shown me such unadulterated and unconditional love. (not counting blood kin that is)

For this man to take time out of his extremely busy life to call to see how I was getting along with my self learning- to gently encourage me and to cheer me on. It GREATLY touched my heart.

Pushka- your experiences that you have been writing about here on the forum, and the questions you have been asking, have awakened these tender sweet memories of mine. You have also GREATLY touched my heart.

Thank you- Dear Pushka- thank you so much. Just remember that there is never a stupid question, if you are uncomfortable- then communicate that to the missionaries, or to the member(s) that make you uncomfortable.

If you have a question- ASK. You will never learn if you don't ask. That is what my folks (Grandma included) have always told me.

If you feel embarrassed to ask on the forum, email me. If I don't know the answer- I will move heaven and earth to get the answer for you!

Love in Christ

Iggy

[candyprpl]

The thread title has caught my attention a few times but I haven't had time to check it out until today.

Wow! I've only been a member (almost) 4 years. About two months after my baptism the missionaries came by to see how I was doing, I asked them, "Aren't there supposed to be new member lessons?" One of the missionaries was one who had taught me and was still in our area. He laughed and said, "You're right." The lessons were set up, and basically they were the same lessons as before my baptism, just a little more detailed, and to see if I had any questions now. I wouldn't have liked role playing, no matter how it was presented.

In the beginning I felt so much pressure (not really from anyone) to know the gospel, Church history, etc. I became more comfortable after I realized that all knowledge comes, 'line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little, there a little.'

I feel for you being the only one in your family. It is hard in the beginning when your knowledge is in such infant stages. But what you do have is your testimony. Why you chose to be baptized and become a member in this Church. Even a small testimony is all you need. I still can't come up with the knowledgable arguments that some in these forums have, but I do have my testimony and sometimes that is more powerful than the other knowledge. Another thing about your testimony, it will grow and become stronger as you study, ponder and pray about what you are learning.

So, don't get too worried about not having all the "right" answers right now.

I teach in primary and sometimes role-playing is used for the kids so they can be prepared to face temptations. Maybe the missionaries are remembering their primary days,

Edited August 22, 2008 by candyprpl

[rameumptom]

Pushka, I never feel bad to give an "I don't know" answer to a question. After all, Socrates did this and he was the wisest man in Athens. Just don't drink the hemlock!

Socrates did show wisdom by realizing how little he knew, compared to all the information in the universe. I recall another wise historical figure that also was known to say how little he knew. Yes, Sgt Shulz on Hogan's Heroes would go around wisely proclaiming, "I know nothing!"