Is it really true?

[SkyWishes]

There is a God, that bit is obvious to me. One only has to look at the miracles of nature to realise that there must be. I worry that people in church are only being nice to me as that is what God would have them do (not what they personally would do). I'm worried that if I leave and go my own way, I'll not get blessings and go to Heaven. Theres a very special guy in my life who I have a lot of feelings for. I was about to leave him this time last year for the church but right now I am not so sure. I turn my back on him and I have the church only is it really true? Or will I spend my whole life running after a foolish dream? Do I turn my back on the church and have a husband a soon a family. Only I might not even be happy then. To be honest right now, all I want is to turn my back on both the man in my life and the church. I grew up in the church and it was all I knew. I left as a teenager but came back as an adult a couple of years a go. When I came back I was vunerable, I had recently had a mental health break down. I was very trusting and my life had no meaning and Im afraid I might have been mislead. I feel at a loss of what to do.

[jolee65]

Clearify the 'I might have been mislead' by who or what???

[SkyWishes]

Into believing it was true, into feeling the need to do everything as I am told to. Into trying not to do "bad" things, even though a lot of the things the church guides its followers to do are good principles. Perhaps even my dad was mislead, hes very guilable and vunerable too as he is badly dyslexic. I feel really scared by this. When I planned on returning to church, I had thought about going to a Church of England chapel not going back to the LDS church. I was abused as a teenager and my mum told me I was a sinner and didn't see the terrible things that were actually happening to me. I don't know if the church is correct I don't know what is right. I just want to do whats right and not upset God but at the same time not be guilable and stick my head out to do what I am told is right when it may not actually be right. I want to do what I feel in my heart is right and what God sees as right but I don't know if what the mormons say that is, is true. How do I know if my friends at church or really my friends or just followers of a church that have instructed to fellowship each other? How do I know that the book of Mormon is true? Ive been trying to follow the rules because I want to be a good person, I don't want to be bad. What if it is all in vain? I really dont know. I think maybe it would be better to not be so guilable.

[LittleWyvern]

Well, if you already know that there is a God, you're halfway there! :)

Three suggestions: first, just ask God what He wants you to do.

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

Second, experiment on God's word.

But behold, if ye will awake and arouse your faculties, even to an experiment upon my words, and exercise a particle of faith, yea, even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that ye can give place for a portion of my words. Now, we will compare the word unto a seed. Now, if ye give place, that a seed may be planted in your heart, behold, if it be a true seed, or a good seed, if ye do not cast it out by your unbelief, that ye will resist the Spirit of the Lord, behold, it will begin to swell within your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me. Now behold, would not this increase your faith? I say unto you, Yea; nevertheless it hath not grown up to a perfect knowledge. But behold, as the seed swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow, then you must needs say that the seed is good; for behold it swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow. And now, behold, will not this strengthen your faith? Yea, it will strengthen your faith: for ye will say I know that this is a good seed; for behold it sprouteth and beginneth to grow. And now, behold, are ye sure that this is a good seed? I say unto you, Yea; for every seed bringeth forth unto its own alikeness. Therefore, if a seed groweth it is good, but if it groweth not, behold it is not good, therefore it is cast away. And now, behold, because ye have tried the experiment, and planted the seed, and it swelleth and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow, ye must needs know that the seed is good. And now, behold, is your knowledge perfect? Yea, your knowledge is perfect in that thing, and your faith is dormant; and this because you know, for ye know that the word hath swelled your souls, and ye also know that it hath sprouted up, that your understanding doth begin to be enlightened, and your mind doth begin to expand. O then, is not this real? I say unto you, Yea, because it is light; and whatsoever is light, is good, because it is discernible, therefore ye must know that it is good; and now behold, after ye have tasted this light is your knowledge perfect? Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither must ye lay aside your faith, for ye have only exercised your faith to plant the seed that ye might try the experiment to know if the seed was good.

Third, just be direct about it. Ask if this church is true or not.

And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things.

Hope that helps. :)

[jadams_4040]

There is a God, that bit is obvious to me. One only has to look at the miracles of nature to realise that there must be. I worry that people in church are only being nice to me as that is what God would have them do (not what they personally would do). I'm worried that if I leave and go my own way, I'll not get blessings and go to Heaven. Theres a very special guy in my life who I have a lot of feelings for. I was about to leave him this time last year for the church but right now I am not so sure. I turn my back on him and I have the church only is it really true? Or will I spend my whole life running after a foolish dream? Do I turn my back on the church and have a husband a soon a family. Only I might not even be happy then. To be honest right now, all I want is to turn my back on both the man in my life and the church. I grew up in the church and it was all I knew. I left as a teenager but came back as an adult a couple of years a go. When I came back I was vunerable, I had recently had a mental health break down. I was very trusting and my life had no meaning and Im afraid I might have been mislead. I feel at a loss of what to do.

i personally know sevearl wonderfully spirituly guided female members whom are mothers,grandmothers sisters e/t.c.. whom husbands ae not members; and i also know they pray each and every day of there lives for the husbands to come and see, They never give up; they always continue to work, pray and fulfill there callings with much spirituality.

Nobody can responsibly answer your question to satisfaction of whats right or wrong; And all i can say is we have all been put hear for a purpose; we all are given adversity to challenge us; :)

[trulykiwi]

Definitely great advice above. It sounds to me that whilst you "grew up in the church" that you may never have gained your own testimony. And I think that is what you now need to do.

It's great that you seek to please God and "do the right thing" - but if you pray, with sincerity of heart, you will know the truth - He will guide you.

I gained my testimony by reading the introduction in the first few pages of The Book Of Mormon - and trust me, when I went to read that the very first time i was skeptical. However, I prayed and I did this with an honest and sincere heart - really desiring to know the truth. It wasn't long after that - that I knew. Everything made sense. I can't explain it - suffice to say I know, without a doubt, that this is the true church.

I sincerely hope you do as I did... open your heart and let the Spirit testify to you :)

[Dove]

Skywishes,

My heart grieves with you/for you as I hear of your background of abuse....what a difficult burden to bear. I relate to what you are saying, as my own dad was quite abusive in my family's home as I was growing up. So, I hope what I say helps you along your journey in life towards being happy and whole, and getting back to God some day......

My first thought is, how loved you are. First and foremost by Heavenly Father, he loves you dearly, so much, and knows very intimately the abuse you suffered, as if He suffered it Himself, for that is what the Saviour did for us, suffer our afflictions along with us. I know God knows our sorrow and sufferd our sorrow as we did.

I believe you are also loved by the members around you. I feel love for you as I write this letter. I understand your concern that they are being nice to your just to score brownie points on their way to heaven....Trust your instincts. Some of them may be nice for those reasons. But trust that others are sincerely there to love. I want to sincerely love. I had a dear friend teach me that life is truly a "want to." That there are "no victims".......That we all get exactly what we want in the end. It was very freeing to be taught this by him.

I understand your guilt, and the conflict between wanting to be a "good" person and not offend God, and the fear mixed in with that, (perhaps not wanting God to punish you as you were so heinously punished as a teenager) and the wanting to be good for other reasons than fear of punishment. This fear of not being a "good" person is an effect of the abuse, imo. I myself have so often said that I just want to be a "good girl." Don't forget, skywishes, if I may include you in this, we are good girls. We are beloved daughters of God who were put in horrific circumstances. I can understand that you would feel vulnerable and would not want to be taken advantage of in your vulnerability.....I would just ask, are you seeking professional help with the abuse issues? If you needed a doctor to treat a broken leg, wouldn't you go? What's the difference with emotional wounds?

I know God lives, and loves us....I know the priesthood power of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is real....It may help you to get a priesthood blessing for comfort in dealing with these issues.....I know the Book of Mormon is true and contains the word of God, which heals my soul. I know the covenants I have made in the waters of baptism and in the temple are authentic and acknowledged of God as binding and real. This is His true church, of that I'm convinced. What does this mean for you? Go to where the love is, God loves you, you can find that in priesthood blessings, in your bishop, in the members of the church who are there to love. Seek their support and goodness. It's there to be had.

Maybe this isn't the time to get married, Skyview. IMO, it sounds like you have a lot of other things to resolve before making such a committed step. I don't know. If this person can love and support you through your struggles right now, he might also be a person worth keeping....it just depends on if you can support each other healthily or not......

Dove

[bytor2112]

Words of a favorite hymn..........

1. O my Father, thou that dwellest

In the high and glorious place,

When shall I regain thy presence

And again behold thy face?

In thy holy habitation,

Did my spirit once reside?

In my first primeval childhood

Was I nurtured near thy side?

2. For a wise and glorious purpose

Thou hast placed me here on earth

And withheld the recollection

Of my former friends and birth;

Yet ofttimes a secret something

Whispered, “You’re a stranger here,”

And I felt that I had wandered

From a more exalted sphere.

3. I had learned to call thee Father,

Thru thy Spirit from on high,

But, until the key of knowledge

Was restored, I knew not why.

In the heav’ns are parents single?

No, the thought makes reason stare!

Truth is reason; truth eternal

Tells me I’ve a mother there.

4. When I leave this frail existence,

When I lay this mortal by,

Father, Mother, may I meet you

In your royal courts on high?

Then, at length, when I’ve completed

All you sent me forth to do,

With your mutual approbation

Let me come and dwell with you.

[LDSVALLEY]

I realize you have no idea who I am and have to take my word on what I say is truthful.

I have been a member for 12 years. I do not join things ever, I do not trust what people tell me without proof and I look for all the Yea they say this but what is the real motive behind it etc.

I need evidence and logic to substantiate things for me to believe. Experience and common sense tell me the church is true beyond any question. And believe me I have had low points where I tried to question it. I will also say that part member marriage can work but it is harder, both my wife and I were baptized the same day, but I have seen evidence of its workings.

And yes marriage without religion can work and be wonderful but I can testify it is much harder to do so. I understand your concerns I had them also for the first few years. Are people being honest or just seeking personal salvation and not really caring etc.

Saints are people. Some hold callings for the glory. Some act spiritual in church and are anything but outside. Some are dishonest, some are racist, immoral, abusive etc. From my experience after 12 years and I questioned everything and every action. I can testify that the majority of Saints are exactly what you see every day. Imperfect but trying.

Today for an example in our Ward a part member family's car wouldn't start, the husband is not a member and was home but could not go pick up wife and child. One member made two trips to get them home, I went out to their home to boost the family car, dead battery. The person we pick up to bring to church didn't feel good so the RS president drove her home, then we drove a member home who was waiting fog Choir practice to finish to get a ride home. Another Less Active drove a new member to a store, he is diabetic and was going into sugar with drawl, and needed sugar right away. In total we had 11 different people provide drives to a dozen members or investigators. We had members help out three members or investigators who were not feeling well.

And this is just what I personally witnessed. So yes, the church is true. Yes at least most of the people there are honestly loving you and wanting you to attend. Yes the Lord will love and bless you.

Lastly remember when choices or life seems hard that we are only here for a small portion of our spiritual existence. But the choices we make carry us through. So do not stay a member or leave because someone here tells you too. Or because one choice or the other is easier in the moment. Do as the Missionaries told me to do. Read the scriptures others have posted to you, think on the words, find a quite peaceful spot and open your soul to the Lord. Then bow your head and pray. Do this a few times because if you are dealing with much termoil of the soul the first pouring out your soul to the Lord might drown out receipt of the Holy Ghost.

As a former unbeliever of such things I know with no question the Lord will answer you. And know that you are not alone with these thoughts and struggles, most everyone goes through them in some manner but it is true, wonderful special and true and as a wonderful special daughter of Heavenly Father you deserve to be around that, it is a gift he has provided for you.