5 years and counting...


mandarin
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I was first introduced to the Church over 5 years ago when I met my best friend, Samuel. He's continued to be a dear friend of mine through the years and is currently serving a mission in South Korea. His family was my first connection with the Church as I previously thought "Mormons weren't allowed to cut their hair" ...a lie told to me by my elder sister who loved playing tricks. :P I immediately became fascinated with the LDS Church and began researching it in my free time online, in the library, and by simply talking to people. I did at one point see the horrible video The God-Makers and was frightened, until Samuel told me most of it is ridiculous and hyped up to frighten people away. Only recently have I begun looking into the Church as a possible convert, not just out of curiosity.

I grew up in a strong Methodist home and have always loved going to church, but I kept having promptings to look into the LDS Church. A few weeks ago I contacted the Missionaries and had the first discussion, the second is coming up in a few days. I have attended sacrament meeting with Samuel in the past and hope to attend the whole 3-hour block this coming Sunday for the first time. The passage the Missionaries left me to read was 3 Nephi 11, similar to a chapter in the Bible, I believe. Honestly, I have been praying earnestly and with all my might but have to yet to receive an answer either way. I'm trying not to rely solely on how I feel because Proverbs 28: 26 says "He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered." So I'm trying the wise-walk and keeping the prayers lifted in hopes of an answer.

I'm excited to see where this journey takes me and continue to be open to both sides, joining or just remaining intrigued.

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Mandarin, the constant draw to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints through out your life is part of an answer. Don't discount it. I grew up with the gospel and kept expecting some overwhelming answer because everyone kept saying. Pray, read, go to church and you will get your answer. What I did not realize is I was feeling the spirit continuously throughout my life because I was trying to be the best person I could be so it was difficult to recognize answers.

It wasn't until I was working in a store one day and I was fixing a VCR (old way of playing videos). I did not have an overwhelming feeling but as I was working everything just pieced together like a perfect jigsaw. I saw how Joseph Smith fit in. I saw how the Book of Mormon fit with the Bible.

I of course questioned it and it wasn't until I spoke to someone wiser than myself. He said, "What are you expecting a hand written sign." He continued, "Look at the fruits of the spirit. What fruits does the Gospel show? That is when it hit me. The Gospel is loving, caring, giving, peaceful and charitable. All the fruits of the spirit.

Quotes:

I think too of the great words of Paul to the Galatians: “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance” These are the fruits of the Spirit of God.

The Spirit is ready. But many people aren’t ready to invite the Spirit. - Eyring

Paul tells us: “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, [and] temperance” I could feel the Spirit carrying my words to their hearts, and I could feel “the fruit of the Spirit” () bringing back to me their love, their joy, and their faith. - Okazaki

The Lord said, “The Spirit enlighteneth every man [and every woman] … that hearkeneth to the voice of the Spirit.” He further said that “every one that hearkeneth to the voice of the Spirit cometh unto God, even the Father.” 2 Some people are seeking to find the abundant life. Paul made it clear that it is “the spirit [that] giveth life.” 3 Indeed, the Savior said, “The words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.” 4 Joy Is a Gift One might ask, then what are the fruits of the Spirit? - Faust

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Mandarin, the Spirit speaks to us in many ways. It did not receive the warm feeling most people talk about but I had an intellectual experience (the puzzle pieced together). On my mission something we would tell the investigators of the Church. Try going down this path, schedule your baptism and see how everything pieces together but also realize you will get opposition too. Look at the fruits of the Spirit, Gospel. You will see they are the same.

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InnerGold,

I know what a VCR is! hahaha

I've felt confused, if you will, even in 9th grade when Samuel and I first met. I received a note from a friend Tania saying that she had just been to a talk from a former Saint who left the church and "found the real Jesus." Tania told me the speech said that all current Mormons still need to be saved and said that she would be willing to help me if I wanted to save Samuel. I'd been getting so many contradictory feelings at that point that after reading the note I began sobbing and knelt on the floor in desperate prayer asking for the truth. I did not receive an answer one way or the other, it still remains as one of the most confusing points in my life, but it also marked the beginning of my research to learn more about the Church.

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Now you know exactly how Joseph Smith felt. It is very confusing. I went on my mission to Michigan and, at the time, they produced 90% of all anti-mormon literature. I was land blasted with everything you could possibly think of. I was confronted by all faiths by people with guns, etc. In actuality, the more persecution the church receives the stronger my testimony grows. Think about it, what other church has people out picketing about us going to hell if we don't change our ways. I cannot think of any! Why?

The funny thing is everything the Gospel stands for is good. Law of Chastity, Word of Wisdom, Fast Offerings, I could go on and on. What is wrong with standing up for moral code? What is wrong with standing up for a healthy lifestyle and abstain from coffee, tea, alcohol, tobacco, etc? All of these things are good and good for the body. However, people are constantly ridiculing the Gospel for being old fashion. The thing they don't understand is, "The Gospel" is not man's church it is our Saviors.

There is a lot of negative out there about the church. Some of it I am sure is true but again, the Church is True not the people. We each have our faults. I know I still feel awful for someone that I teased when I was younger. I sure hope I did not cause him to leave the Gospel but I never saw him again. I wish I could find that person and apologize. Youth foibles!

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Hi mandarin and welcome... now you got me all excited too! Enjoy the time of searching and learning. I never got any special big aahhaaa for my testimony, but I was babtized and I am not dissapointed and I hope God is not either! See you around!

GoodMakers uh... my mother made me read a very bad anti book... IT was all lie and scaring people away... such a stupid thing to do write such noncense!

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InnerGold,

I know what a VCR is! hahaha

I've felt confused, if you will, even in 9th grade when Samuel and I first met. I received a note from a friend Tania saying that she had just been to a talk from a former Saint who left the church and "found the real Jesus." Tania told me the speech said that all current Mormons still need to be saved and said that she would be willing to help me if I wanted to save Samuel. I'd been getting so many contradictory feelings at that point that after reading the note I began sobbing and knelt on the floor in desperate prayer asking for the truth. I did not receive an answer one way or the other, it still remains as one of the most confusing points in my life, but it also marked the beginning of my research to learn more about the Church.

You know, you described something that was actually my strong "burning in the bosom" testimony moment.

I'm intrigued by your comment that you don't want to rely solely on your feelings (and you quoted a verse from the Bible). I'm not going to try to convince you of anything, but I wanted to share something. When I pray about a doctrine or something, oftentimes, I feel a sense of peace. My turmoil after reading some very hateful material against the Church banished when I prayed to Heavenly Father and invoked the name of Jesus to know the truth. I can only say that I felt such a peace that I knew it came from Heaven--I had never felt that before. So, although that scripture says to not rely on your feelings, I truly feel that it is through the heart AND mind that God answers my prayers. Sometimes, I confuse my feelings with answers from God--but there are times when it is unmistakable that it is more than me.

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Hi mandarin and welcome... now you got me all excited too! Enjoy the time of searching and learning. I never got any special big aahhaaa for my testimony, but I was babtized and I am not dissapointed and I hope God is not either! See you around!

GoodMakers uh... my mother made me read a very bad anti book... IT was all lie and scaring people away... such a stupid thing to do write such noncense!

So I take it your mother wasn't too keen on your conversion? How did you deal with that? I'm scared about approaching my parents if I do end up converting...

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Mandarin, I was thinking more about your post last night and I did a little bit of study. If you read all of Proverbs 28, everything that is being referred to is not to put the trust in man but put the trust in the Lord in all things.

Then the next question is: How can I hear the Lord? That is when you need to research how Heavenly Father answers prayers. You can do a lot of scriptural research on Scriptures with a click of the button instead of changing pages.

I hope this can help you towards your quest. It is a noble one.

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Mandarin,

I read all the post and see your quest for answers and not from man but from the Father, InnerGlod is right understanding how prayers are answered is important. Im a covert 8yrs, but my husband he was raised in the church anyway when I started praying I didnt know when I was receiving an answer but I did notice things happening, if it was a yes or no question the wrong one would leave my mind quickly,

and then there was a day I just felt like I couldnt get through a situation I was struggleing through and I just so happend to look down at a paper and the first thing that my eyes seen was "push forward", that might not seem like alot to some but to me it was saying I see you I feel your pain but just keep going.

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So I take it your mother wasn't too keen on your conversion? How did you deal with that? I'm scared about approaching my parents if I do end up converting...

My urge to become an LDS was too strong to follow her wishes, I KNEW with all my heart the Church to be true. I was very sad as no one around me could see through the lies that are spread about LDS. I still wonder about people who can say it is wrong.... Anyway I felt sad, but my babtizing day was just topp. Already, when I noticed that I knew, I felt an enourmous inner peace to fill me. I had no doubt what so ever. The BoM gave such inner peace in me, that I could not resistit and I did not want to loose it.

Just before my babtizement I toild my mother and I remember that I sat on a kitchen stair, the kind you can step on top get the things from the highest shelfs, and I gried so very much saying that It is MY life and that I felt that the Church was true and that I could not deny it. She was not shouting or anything. She was perfectly calm and told me she would like me to consider it, and not to get babtized.

Her father was a VERY well known lutheran preast and theolog. I could understnd their hurt, but I dont think any of them could understand mine. My husband was not saying much but looked like a thunder cloud. Later my mother has confessed that the church has made me a better person. She could see the change in me. There was a while I tought she also might understand, but it was too much for her to go against her father... and then my oldesta girl made a mess of her life and resighned LDS and they found comfort in one an other against me and LDS again.

I just came in a conclution about life that things happen all the time. Just when you think you got it all right everything is flowing well and you are happy ... somethning happens again to chalenge you. With the gospel in my life I have a safe secure harbour to go to when the storms hit. No matter if you are married or not, with a family or not, that harbour is your harbour including no other persons. Life may be lonely sometimes, but the happyness you get from the gospel overcomes the lonelyness. You can not trust ANY person in your life they will deceave you (or at least may), the only thing you can trust is the gospel, Jesus and God, they will never decieve you.

Sometimes you just need to take the bull by the horns.... but sometimes you should sit back and wait. I sat and waited for my ex 9 months... stil that part did nto work.

It is difficult to understand or hear, at least for me, what God tells me to do, maybe that is why I seem to get my part of difficulties doubbled. :( My answers are mine, yours may be different. But the pain in my heart when thinking of not getting babtized was real, Im knew God expected me to have it done. Maybe he wants you to wait, maybe not.....

When you make the decition, it may be wrong one... I done that a couple times ... real boomers... then you just have to be a good girl and take the consiquences. Stand tall behind your wrong choise and do what you are expected to make the best of the situation. Apologize if needed, correct what was done wrong as well as you can, correct your directions, but never give up God, as He wont give up you ever.

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I still feel inspired to say more for some reason, I guess I wouldnt push myself dont walk away to soon and dont covert to quickly.Understanding the beliefs of the church is important , for me I had an experience that was refered to as quickened or caught up, thats the spirit telling you your ready, it came very easy for me to understand the teachings and the ways of the church. You will have your experience but you have to earn it, also feed the need to find answers be in tune to the spirit by paying attention to the swelling of you heart. The spirit was always very overwhelming for me it could put me to the ground the humbling that takes over my heart and mind.

The covertion is usually a very good time for a soon to be member, alot of people envy the process your experiencing, embrace it.

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At the same time, you have to take into consideration that everyone feels the spirit differently. I wish I had the overwhelming, wham-o, knock me to the ground, no denying it but it was not the case. I still go back to studying about how prayers are answered and then allow Heavenly Father to answer in his own way.

If a person is waiting for the wham-o, they could wait the rest of their lives. Part of the conversion is faith.

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I think it is not as much in to; are you ready to be babtized as in the commitment.. are you ready to take the committment and stay strong even though the world may point a finger at you and laugh...

I loved the gospel from the begenning and it was easy for me. Many things might have rocked my belief later... but they did and do not not :eek:.... I have no idea why, but I have always tried to attend the church and tried to do the right n o matter how "angry" I was at any person in church or even God..

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