kileyizzle Posted April 9, 2009 Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 hello everyone! i'm new to the church and got baptsied last year, now... that i am a LDS i have found it incrediably hard to date... no i'm not a model or a typically hot girl <wafer thin that looks like you could snap her if you wanted to play catch > but... it's very confusing and while i love and adore almost everybody, these lds men are... somewhat difficult to decode. looking through these forums i see, looks are coming before anything else, and in my experience with the boys from church that is very true.... looks are... apparently everything to these boys... < note i used apparently > looks do fade away as people get older, on both ends of the scale... personality, compassion these are the things that should matter i recently had one incident where a young lds man had taken my fancy, apparently i had too, that was till atleast i had the news that he had another girl on the scene... while these boys may be mormon they are still men, just alot diffrent then non members... i don't know i'm just babbling... someone throw me a bone here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted April 9, 2009 Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 (edited) around here, when i was in the ysa program (a bit over 8 yrs ago), we would have ysa conferences. they would be a whole weekend, 2 dances, lots of games, speakers, sunday services.... sometimes we'd get together in groups and travel up to 6 hours to attend one. they were well worth it. it was a great way to meet folks, especially for those of us that lived in smaller areas. i'd suggest asking around and see if there are any in your area, and if not talk to your stake reps about planning one. we had our own networking email chain for sending out the info and spreading the news of the different conferences. it was such a good chain it took me a few yrs after i got married to stop getting the fliers. lol oh one other thing that i found was very common among the lds here, seems to be a culture thing, not saying you should be ok with it, just another perspective. folks would date a lot of different ppl at once. i went out with a couple other guys while i was dating my husband (well the man who became my husband lol i don't date other men now), i know he dated several other girls. until we dated long enough that we both agreed it was progressing to something "more" it's not exclusive. it was an attitude of unless you actually said, "we are boyfriend/girlfriend" or something difinative it was expected you may and could date other ppl. not everyone was like that but a lot. Edited April 9, 2009 by Gwen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kileyizzle Posted April 9, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 haha yeah i'm going to one of those activites tomorrow night... the thing is when you've had twenty years of going out and doing what you want, it's a huge shock to the system going to these dances and there's not a single mini skirt or low cut top to be found... while this is confronting, i encourage the two other YSA's in our ward to attend also, and girls well, they travel in packs... out of my entire ward, we are the three youngest girls there, over the age of 18, this makes it difficult for us to network with anybody... we are all new members too... wards are difficult at the best of times but we can't become less actives... these mormon guys do my head in though... so confusing... just like.. diffrent from non members, like the way you dress, speak it's just... yeah not sure how to ... approach that at all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 9, 2009 Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 As being a male YSA...closer to retirment that a new ysa... looks are a factor...but a minor one, and everyone is attracted to different things, and based on your pic..honelsty, i think you are attractive...but outer beauty is only so much...and depending on where you live...being a new converrt might be intimidating to some guys... I konw when i lived out in UT, me being a "re-active" guy..who has quite an interesting past..but am a worthy guy now..just that fact eliminated me from 90% of the girls out theres radar.. and still where I live now...I'm not an RM.. and have been told i look like Kevin James (king of queens)..and as far as i know he's not any girls fantasy guy. The best advice i can offer, is be yourself, be freindly, and just be freinds, recently a pair of freinds of mine, who ere really close....and they finally realized that they like each other....and they "is like peas and carrots...." not everyone is superficial, and to the right guy you will be the most beautiful girl in the world, I have learned in my nearly 30 yrs on this rock, a pretty girl is just that...but as your feelings for her grow, she gets bueatiful Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted April 9, 2009 Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 Whether LDS or not, looks of a woman is a large factor; you can't hide that fact. The first thing to catch a man's attention will be the looks of a woman - what will keep him is the kind of person you are. Look your best and go meet some guys - not ALL men will not like someone if they aren't a Kellie Pickler. Go out, have fun, and meet people. Give it time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted April 9, 2009 Report Share Posted April 9, 2009 Look your best and go meet some guys - not ALL men will not like someone if they aren't a Kellie Pickler. Go out, have fun, and meet people. Give it time.I know some guys who won't like girls who do look like Kellie Pickler. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 I know some guys who won't like girls who do look like Kellie Pickler. :)I can assure you I'm not one of them!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 i recently had one incident where a young lds man had taken my fancy, apparently i had too, that was till atleast i had the news that he had another girl on the scene...Did you talk about exclusivity? Or is it a case of you thought he was interested, he stopped going out with you and you found out he was going out with a different girl? Depending on how many dates you went on I suppose that could be akward. On review it looks like Gwen has gone into it.these mormon guys do my head in though... so confusing... just like.. diffrent from non members, like the way you dress, speak it's just... yeah not sure how to ... approach that at allConsidering you're a member approach them as you would any other person who holds your standards. You said it yourself:while these boys may be mormon they are still men Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kileyizzle Posted April 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 dudes, thanks all for the wicked as responses.... much appreciated.... guys are still guys... who is that kellie dude? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 dudes, thanks all for the wicked as responses....much appreciated....guys are still guys...who is that kellie dude?she's a white trash girl that won american idol a couple years ago...or at least was on it..now a country star.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRomans Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 Like people have stated above, looks do count to some extent but they are not everything. Just meet as many people as you can, let your good qualities stand out and eventually you will find the right guy who will love you for who you are. Good Luck :) Tyler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 she's a white trash girl that won american idol a couple years ago...or at least was on it..now a country star....Oh, JB, she's not white trash! She's very southern, but not white trash (if you've never met white trash, then I have some family members to introduce you to).And she didn't win.Here's a classic from her:YouTube - funny kellie pickler are you smarter... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 kinda like the miss south carolina thing.... these girls are not helping the southern sterotype Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 she's a white trash girl that won american idol a couple years ago...or at least was on it..now a country star....She's not white trash and she didn't win. She's cute, and really attractive. Kinda a ditz, though.I agree! U.S. Americans NEED MORE MAPS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 eh, she's not exactly my cup of tea.... intellegence is a major factor in attractivness Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRomans Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 I would have to agree with Jbs here. I would rather date an intelligent girl who was slightly less attractive then say a beautiful blonde girl who has as much intelligence as a brick wall. I have seen that video and just shook my head that some people are actually like that. Our society is doomed lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 Yeah, she looks like a complete dummy there, but other appearances she acts normal. I think some of it may be an act. Anyways, enough about Kellie Pickler. How's the original poster doing with her dilemma? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted April 10, 2009 Report Share Posted April 10, 2009 hahahahaha!!!! Oh that was just funny!!! yeah...the blond stereotypes are alive and well...there goes a contributor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 11, 2009 Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 I would have to agree with Jbs here. I would rather date an intelligent girl who was slightly less attractive then say a beautiful blonde girl who has as much intelligence as a brick wall. I have seen that video and just shook my head that some people are actually like that. Our society is doomed lol.no wonder Obama got elected..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted April 11, 2009 Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 no wonder Obama got elected.....Let's not go off on that tangent either lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kileyizzle Posted April 11, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 still completely bummed about it... chocolate and movies cheeeah boi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted April 11, 2009 Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 kelly, if you get the chance, come visit the states and visit a singles ward..cute girl with that cool aussie accent...you'd have all sorts of boys talkin to ya.... and what is a cheetah boi???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRomans Posted April 11, 2009 Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 kelly, if you get the chance, come visit the states and visit a singles ward..cute girl with that cool aussie accent...you'd have all sorts of boys talkin to ya....and what is a cheetah boi????Haha yeah Kiley the guys in North America would be all over you. Jbs "cheeah boi" means "yeah boy" or in other terms she is saying chocolate and movies are great or awesome. :) Tyler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kileyizzle Posted April 11, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 11, 2009 lol, lost intrest in the movie half way through, and started belting out the tom jones... oh yeah the boys are gonna be all over me... " love is like candy on a shelllllf " lmao... working in a music store is hard sometimes... you may leave at 6 but the songs stay in your head for hours... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kileyizzle Posted January 10, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2010 Argh, so... the diliemma continues... rofl, so i have been pretty forward in meeting YSA's and asking them to hang, apparently the dudes take this as, oh my, she's intrested BAIL! somebody feed me cookie dough and watch full house? or freinds? something.... lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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