lovemykids Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 what are you ladies' general feelings about plastic surgery...mainly tummy tucks?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RachelleDrew Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 I'm biding my time before getting one myself. I want the loose skin around my stomach GONE so I can be attractive again. Lol. So long as it doesn't become excessive, and isn't draining your income I fail to see the problem with plastic surgery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted June 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 I am having some serious insecurity issues and my tummy is one of the reasons...I had three c-sections in a little over four years and my appendix out in the middle of all of that...my tummy needs work:o I was born a worrier and I always worry about the risks vs. the good that it would do me....but it is something that I really want to do.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 what are you ladies' general feelings about plastic surgery...mainly tummy tucks??How does your husband feel about it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul_Searcher Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 Go for it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted June 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 How does your husband feel about it?He just wants me to be happy...whatever makes me more comfortable with myself he is supportive of...truth be told it seems that my insecurity is causing issues for us...If he says "you look nice today" I say "no i don't" and it is getting old to him....he does worry that if I got a tummy tuck then I would have a scar to make me feel bad about my tummy.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 I told the same to my wife when she raised the issue after having 8-children naturally. I love her then as I love more now and greater into the eternities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilered Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 what are you ladies' general feelings about plastic surgery...mainly tummy tucks??Why do you seperate tummy tucks from other types of plastic surgery such as face lifts, nose or lip changes and/or breast enhancements?Aren't all of these type of elective cosmetic surgeries all basic, in that they are designed to change and improve ones present body form into something more desirable?While I personally have nothing against them, I sometimes wonder if they aren't a bit self indulgent and somewhat vain even though I have supported by wife on three different ocassions when she had them done on her skin and face. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted June 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 Why do you seperate tummy tucks from other types of plastic surgery such as face lifts, nose or lip changes and/or breast enhancements?Aren't all of these type of elective cosmetic surgeries all basic, in that they are designed to change and improve ones present body form into something more desirable?While I personally have nothing against them, I sometimes wonder if they aren't a bit self indulgent and somewhat vain even though I have supported by wife on three different ocassions when she had them done on her skin and face.I don't seperate any elective plastic surgery from another...I only wonder about tummy tucks simply because that is the only procedure I would have done...I do worry about my family and friends telling me how selfish these things are, that is one of my main concerns... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 I don't seperate any elective plastic surgery from another...I only wonder about tummy tucks simply because that is the only procedure I would have done...I do worry about my family and friends telling me how selfish these things are, that is one of my main concerns...Plastic surgery dos not and will not make anybody happy. We tend to idealize certain aspects of our physical persona and often come to believe, based on stereotypes, that by changing them we will "feel" better/happier. The facts are that, unfortunately, the last two generations of women completely surrendered their womanhood to false and bizarre standards of beauty created by psychologically defective people to begin with! The simple facts remain that a woman thinks "I will look better to others and that will make me feel better." or, how about this version: "Other will look at me with approval because I'd look _______", and of course "I will be/appear sexy, more attractive to others." That is the real mental process at play. Some attempt to rationalize and deny such realities but it does not change the facts. Plastic surgery does very little when it comes to the enhancement of the marital relationship, which is where it should matter the most. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glow_inthe_dark_girl Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 I'd say go for it if you think that will make you more self confident then do it ... my friend is going to have a rhinoplasty because he thinks that would make him happier . to me is not selfish... i want the lasik surgery (eye surgery) but my parents won't let me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 There are a couple of things I wish I could do. But since insurance won't pay for cosmetic and I certainly can't pay out of pocket..I will just have to live with my imperfections. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenamarie Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 There are a couple of things I wish I could do. But since insurance won't pay for cosmetic and I certainly can't pay out of pocket..I will just have to live with my imperfections.Only until the Millenium. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 So true JenaMarie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted June 26, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 thanks ladies for your comments....I think it is hard for men to understand how it makes us feel to look one way and then have beautiful babies and then look completely different...I do not think that plastic surgery is a cure-all....My husband and I are very happily married...he just gets discouraged that I can't take a compliment...I don't know yet if I will get a tummy tuck or not...it is a big decision...that my husband and I will make together....thanks for your help Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 ok i see a tummy tuck after babies or large amts of weight loss as different than just getting one cause you don't like your tummy. after having babies you have scars, scars that can make you feel bad about your self image. i see nothing wrong with improving that. if someone was in a car accident and had damage to their face ppl would see them getting cosmetic surgery as different than those that are just "altering their body". so why should removing the scars from having babies any different? i was told once that some insurance plans will cover a tummy tuck within a certian time frame after having kids ... something to look into? oh and i'm planning on getting one once i know for sure i'm done having kids..... not saying i won't change my mind come that point but right now i've already told my husband i want one. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted June 26, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 I have had three beautiful little girls all delivered by c-section...gained some weight over those 4 1/2 years...now I have lost about 40 pounds...and let me tell ya...the tummy that I complained about ten years ago, I would kill for today...that is all I want back....I just want to feel good about the way I look.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 Then do it.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alana Posted June 26, 2009 Report Share Posted June 26, 2009 (edited) There are a few boob jobs in the ward. Anyways, I'm a candidate for a tummy tuck. I also think i like my body way more than most of the skinny girls at church. Well, except for the aerobics instructor. How could she NOT like that body? Anyways, I might be getting fat and saggy, but all it takes is for a bad cold and I'm like 'I love you body! Just be healthy and happy!' I won't be going in for surgery anytime soon, if I can afford it or not. To each their own. I believe my friends when they say I'm great the way I am, even though they are obsessing about not being able to fit into their size 4 jeans two months after giving birth. Edited June 26, 2009 by Alana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hankpac Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 (edited) The original poster has her answer, as far as the actual procedure goes. However, when she posted, and again later, she alludes to insecurities that are at the foundation of her desire to get this done. If one just goes into the office that does this, there probably won't be any counseling done, which would happen if the procedure were done following a referral from her doctor. Why is this important? Because often, when insecurity is at the basis of the request for surgery (any surgery) it turns out that the surgery was not the answer to the problem. The patient is still insecure, unhappy, or still has whatever problem she (or he, to a lesser extent) went in with. However, if a person has some counseling along with the procedure, and has her self-image bolstered, and doesn't go in expecting the wrong things (if I got this done, then I would feel better about myself, and would be happy), she will do much better, than without. I have seen many people who end up going back again and again, seeking that final magic touch that will make them happy, able to accept compliments, feel better, etc. I have also seen patients who are really successful after surgery, who went in well prepared, and knew what to expect. A final thought: A compliment (You really look nice today) doesn't mean he thinks you look like someone else (someone you are not) it means to him, your appearance is pleasing and makes him feel good. Try saying: "Thanks, I am glad I please you." Or "When you say that it makes me feel good/pretty", every time, until you actually mean it. Absolutely do not say what you usually say, practice it, until you can do it. If you keep denying the compliment, eventually you stop getting them, and it becomes self-fulfilling (He never compliments me. I must be unlovely or ugly, he hates me, he can't stand my looks...etc). People who are insecure in this manner, often hold other people up for themselves as ideals of what they wish they looked like. "I wish I was thin like her, and pretty like her, and handle the kids like that one does, and was adored by thousands like that one, and could cook like that one, and had a house like hers, etc etc." This is a recipe for failure. Instead we should be appreciating that our mate, who chose us for eternity, loves and appreciates us exactly how we are. If he says you look great. Believe it. Say thanks. Say "and that's just one side of me." Or even, "I was hoping you would like me in this". I bet you get a "Oooh, baby do I ever." as he closes in for the big hug. I also suggest re-reading Islander's post (#10) as he/she says much the same thing I am saying. Edited July 1, 2009 by hankpac Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 (edited) what are you ladies' general feelings about plastic surgery...mainly tummy tucks??I'm curious why its limited to ladies. Because I'm a guy and if somebody offered me a free tummy tuck (I've lost a lot of weight and have skin hanging off me I don't want) I'd probably jump on it. I probably have media induced insecurities about it though, and if I was married and my wife was, "You look fine, don't worry about it you big stud you." it might change things. Edited December 10, 2009 by Dravin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prospectmom Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 Dravin, I do not think it is Limited to females... males get them after weight loss also . I think it is more than a cosmetic thing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemykids Posted July 1, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 I'm curious why its limited to ladies'. Because I'm a guy and if somebody offered me a free tummy tuck (I've lost a lot of weight and have skin hanging off me I don't want) I'd probably jump on it. I probably have media induced insecurities about it though, and if I was married and my wife was, "You look fine, don't worry about it you big stud you." it might change things.Didn't mean anything by saying Ladies....just was posting on the RS and Womens Issues forum...just wanted some opinions...not trying to irritate anyone.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mightynancy Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 All I know is that if our daughter has MIL's nose (it's too soon to tell), I'm making Daddy get her a new one. She's way too pretty to have a nose like that.On the serious side of this thread, I totally get the insecure thing...and I'm trying to bluff my way out of it. Mainly by declaring myself "flabulous"...and whenever my husband compliments me, I smile and say "I KNOW! Aren't you LUCKYYYY??" and give him a squeeze. It's not a perfect fix, but things are getting better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 Didn't mean anything by saying Ladies....just was posting on the RS and Womens Issues forum...just wanted some opinions...not trying to irritate anyone....You weren't irritating anyone, well at least you weren't irritating me and I'm not the type to insist we always ask questions in gender neutral language. I suppose the turn of phrase was just my way of saying it isn't limited to ladies even if that is the stereotype (just look at the billboards). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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