I am headed to the womens shelter shortly


ServiceDogHandler
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I am getting my bags pack to head to the womens shelter. The police phoned to let me know that my husband is in town and contacted them to get some of his stuff. I let the police know this is what he does every time he comes to town and that I tell them the same thing. I gave all his stuff to his parents back in April. All I have left is my stuff and marital items that the courts have to decide on. Thanks to his girlfriend, who has taken him back(now I no longer worry about her. She knows his history now and she has to make her own mistakes) she let me know he knows where I live. The police warned me that he could want to hurt me and that is why he is stalking me. So I am headed to the womens shelter. I just have to wait for one phone call from the constable.

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Check back in when you have a chance and let us know you are ok! Hopefully your landlord will help like he indicated he would and find you a new place.

Not sure what else to say. Sure wish he would stop. Wish I could do something about it. What's it going to take for the police to figure out his motives? At least the new gf let you know he knows where you live.

Be safe!

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Thanks. I should be moving at the end of August. In the province I am in there are no stalking laws. So until he either contacts me, stops me in public or breaks into my house there is nothing the police can do. I think that is not right. There is a no contact order. They should be stopping him from doing this.

I have no idea how to make it stop either. I have moved into hiding once already. I have done everything the police, my lawyer, therpist and the womens shelter has told me to do. What else can I do to make him stop. I just want him out of my life. I am so tired of living in fear. I have been for 7yrs.

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Please try and stay in touch with us if you can. Now I'm going to worry about you. You be safe and do what you have to do to do just that.

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I agree Ryan. They deal with it a lot, probably know what to do in that situation, and are there for you. I hear what you're saying, living under that stress is not good and there is a fine line between what the law can do in this type of situation. It has gotten better though with the stalking laws and the concept of just having to report "feeling frightened". Document all events to give to the police (any phone calls, things he's said, etc.)

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Thanks. I should be moving at the end of August. In the province I am in there are no stalking laws. So until he either contacts me, stops me in public or breaks into my house there is nothing the police can do. I think that is not right. There is a no contact order. They should be stopping him from doing this.

I have no idea how to make it stop either. I have moved into hiding once already. I have done everything the police, my lawyer, therpist and the womens shelter has told me to do. What else can I do to make him stop. I just want him out of my life. I am so tired of living in fear. I have been for 7yrs.

I hope you are safe.....when you move will he not be able to locate you????

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I am home now. Didn't sleep a wink at the shelter. My head would not slow down. Nothing is missing from the house and there are no strange calls on the phone. So all is well. I doubt he is still in town, since he is living at his parents he has to account for his wearabouts. I feel much better and safe now too. Thanks for all the prayers and safety wishes. Makes me feel so much better that others are out there that care about what happens to me.

Yes when I move he will most likely find me agian. That is why I have to keep using the resources that are here to keep myself safe.

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  • 1 month later...

Whatever you do, don't take chances. Often times someone in the police or social service roll offers advise based on what they were taught in books only. You are in the best position to know what to do to portect youself. listen to yourself and follow your 1st instint. Its usually right.

Another idea or answer might be to move completely away from where anyone knows you and start over. Expensive and hard to do but you don't want to take chances with your life and safety...

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest ThisisJames
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I am getting my bags pack to head to the womens shelter. The police phoned to let me know that my husband is in town and contacted them to get some of his stuff. I let the police know this is what he does every time he comes to town and that I tell them the same thing. I gave all his stuff to his parents back in April. All I have left is my stuff and marital items that the courts have to decide on. Thanks to his girlfriend, who has taken him back(now I no longer worry about her. She knows his history now and she has to make her own mistakes) she let me know he knows where I live. The police warned me that he could want to hurt me and that is why he is stalking me. So I am headed to the womens shelter. I just have to wait for one phone call from the constable.

This just made me lol rly.

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  • 2 months later...

There are cases where the social security office will approve a name and social security number change due to abuse. I am going to be asking for this for myself and my son once my divorce is final, because my husband had both of our social security cards, so he could easily use them for identity theft or to hunt us down. It can be hard to do, because such cases are rarely approved, but it sounds like your case may qualify.

"According to the SSA, you can only change your number if it has already been used for fraudulent purposes, if you know it's about to be used against you, or if there's a verifiable threat against your life, such as a stalker... The exact criteria the SSA requires before allowing someone to create a new number include:

• Sequential SSNs assigned to members of the same family are causing problems.

• More than one person has been assigned, or is using, the same number.

• Commonly held religious or cultural objection to certain numbers/digits in the SSN

• Despite trying to resolve problems brought on by SSN misuse, such as by an identity thief, a victim continues to be disadvantaged by the continuing SSN misuse.

• Harassment, abuse or life endangerment situations (including domestic violence)." Quoted from: Your Social Security Number - Vulnerable But Inflexible

Talk to your social security office to see what they can do.

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