mrrellim Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 Hi everyone,I am hoping someone can help me because despite a lot of research I can not find what I am looking for.A number of years back I remember reading in the ensign, I don't remember if it was a conference talk or a regular article, one of the prophets (or quorm of the twelve) said they went to visit a daughter/granddaughter in the hospital after their latest child was born and the daughter/granddaughter asked if they could stop having kids.The reply was something along the lines of "How many children you have is between you, your husband and the Lord. And should be depend on how many you can handle physically, mentally, and financially." My main interest in finding this article is to prove to my father-in-law that it exists. He says that a prophet of the Lord would never bring finances into how many children a couple should have because "if you run out of money the church will make up the difference", whereas I feel that the church teaches us that we should be able to take care of our own and if for some unforseen circumstance we can't, and no other family members are able to help then the Church will provide some assistance. thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deseretgov Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 It's probably in "True to the Faith" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 I remember something like that as well and am searching for it. But even on lds.org under just basic information it states this:God has a plan for the happiness of all who live on the earth, and the birth of children in loving families is central to His plan. The first commandment He gave to Adam and Eve was to “be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth” (Genesis 1:28). The scriptures declare, “Children are a heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Those who are physically able have the blessing, joy, and obligation to bear children and to raise a family. This blessing should not be postponed for selfish reasons. Sexual relations within marriage are not only for the purpose of procreation, but also a means of expressing love and strengthening emotional and spiritual ties between husband and wife.Husband and wife are encouraged to pray and counsel together as they plan their families. Issues to consider include the physical and mental health of the mother and father and their capacity to provide the basic necessities of life for their children. Decisions about birth control and the consequences of those decisions rest solely with each married couple. Elective abortion as a method of birth control, however, is contrary to the commandments of God. To me that is saying that financial abilities to care for children should be a factor as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanh Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 She was the mother of eight children and was in her early forties. She asked, “Father, may I stop having children now?” His response was, “Don’t ask me. That decision is between you, your husband, and your Father in Heaven. If you two can face him with a good conscience and can say you have done the best you could, that you have really tried, then you may stop. But, that is between you and Him. I have enough problems of my own to talk over with Him when we meet!” So it is clear to me that the decisions regarding our children, when to have them, their number, and all related matters and questions can only be made after real discussion between the marriage partners and after prayer.Digging way back to 1979 in the Ensign's I Have a Question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 Thanks ryanh. That article also mentions financial as well: the parents’ capacity to provide basic necessities, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeekerToo Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 Thanks for those references! It is basically discouraged to buy "luxury articles" or wait for the perfect job, finances, etc to start your family. That said, if you, your spouse and HF decide that you should wait *for whatever reason* then that is that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanh Posted August 2, 2009 Report Share Posted August 2, 2009 "if you run out of money the church will make up the difference" That seems quite contrary to what I have understood regarding self-reliance and fiscal responsibility taught by the church. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 Totally agree with you ryan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrrellim Posted August 3, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 Thank you everyone for your help. This is exactly the info I was looking for. I personally believe that the reason my father-in-law gets so defensive when ever I mention this statement is because he had 8 kids and never had enough to support them all and he might think I am being judgmental, which I am not, I'm just trying to give him some reasoning on why none of his 8 kids have decided to have large families. Mitch Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 With what you have said Mitch I don't see you as being judgmental in this at all. Though I could see how he might perceive that. The number of children a couple decide to have is such a personal decision that should be made only between themselves and our Heavenly Father. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 My main interest in finding this article is to prove to my father-in-law that it exists.Being that others have already found the article for you, I'll just state this: It's none of your father-in-law's business how many children you and your wife choose to have. She has left him and cleaved unto you. Now it's time for him to rejoice in the grandchildren you do give him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lestertheemt Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 Exactly, Wing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BenRaines Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 I didn't check the article but I believe it was President Kimball who told that story. Ben Raines Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prisonchaplain Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 FWIW, Jewish law says that in order to fulfill the command to be fruitful and multiply a family should have at least one girl and one boy. The traditional Old Testament blessing of "May your quiver be full," meant five children (a quiver held five arrows). If neither of those is helpful, prisonchaplain has three daughters and is done... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeekerToo Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 FWIW, Jewish law says that in order to fulfill the command to be fruitful and multiply a family should have at least one girl and one boy. The traditional Old Testament blessing of "May your quiver be full," meant five children (a quiver held five arrows). If neither of those is helpful, prisonchaplain has three daughters and is done...Wow, that would be hard to fulfill the gender law! I know people who have had 10 boys and heard of another with 12 girls. They all decided to stop trying for the other gender! Does that mean they weren't fruitful under Jewish law? Yikes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrrellim Posted August 3, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 FYI, we have a boy and a girl. We would have loved more but it's been 10 years since our youngest was born so it looks like it won't happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrazyKay Posted August 3, 2009 Report Share Posted August 3, 2009 We have only 1 girl (9 years old), we've been trying for another child - but found out my hormones are out of whack and the medicine is outside our budget . I told my husband that if Heavenly Father wants us to have another child, I would be pregnant. But I think with my husband's Aspergers that Heavenly Father knows he can't handle more than one child at a time, so I think our next one won't be until our daughter is old enough to help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dnc76v22 Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 (edited) Wow, that would be hard to fulfill the gender law! I know people who have had 10 boys and heard of another with 12 girls. They all decided to stop trying for the other gender! Does that mean they weren't fruitful under Jewish law? Yikes!After having the twins, my mother decided that if by chance she did finally have another boy so that I could have a baby brother, I would be to old to be interested in playing with him by the time he was old enough to walk.By the way, mother was 40 years old when the twins were born. Edited August 6, 2009 by dnc76v22 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alana Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 This thread makes me want a baby. Maybe twins. MMMM baby smell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dnc76v22 Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 FYI, we have a boy and a girl. We would have loved more but it's been 10 years since our youngest was born so it looks like it won't happen.My brother, who was my mother's 2nd child, was 15 when her 3rd child, me, was born. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dnc76v22 Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 This thread makes me want a baby. Maybe twins. MMMM baby smell.Be careful what you wish for. My great grandfather was a twin, grandfather was a twin and had twins as his youngest sons, and then my Dad's youngest are twins. One of my niece's has also had twins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEthePrimate Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 Have seven children, regardless of your situation. Seven symbolically represents perfection, or completion, and so seven children would make for the ideal family size. Right? HEP Baku 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 No, seven is the perfect family size. Meaning you should have five children (unless you are a polygamist, in which case you need fewer). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alana Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 Be careful what you wish for. My great grandfather was a twin, grandfather was a twin and had twins as his youngest sons, and then my Dad's youngest are twins. One of my niece's has also had twins. My mom was a twin (though identical so it doesn't count) but my brother was a twin, so she has the double egg ovulation thing. I'll take what I can get:P I already have two kids, so whatever happens, I'm a happy camper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted August 6, 2009 Report Share Posted August 6, 2009 This thread makes me want a baby. Maybe twins. MMMM baby smell. I have twins. Yuck the smell when they both had dirty diapers at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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