ploomf Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 So I have a friend that I've known since high school. She was very active in the church but her family were all inactive members and she didn't have a lot of support. After we graduated she moved away and stopped going to church. She says there were no real doctrinal issues with the church but she is very shy and the ward she was in wasn’t very welcoming or nice. She says going to church became more of a burden than a joy and she left feeling spiritually exhausted instead of uplifted so she just stopped going. She still obeys the word of wisdom, prays, and all that she just doesn't go to church. Well she just moved back to our town and she’d like to start going to church with me but there is one problem that she isn’t sure how to handle. Her job now. She has started writing romance novels for a living. You know the ones with the half naked people in very uncomfortable positions on the cover? Yeah those kinds of novels. She has one published, is working on her second one, and I think she said she has a contract to write two more but I’m not sure about that. She’s not sure how to handle this if she goes to church again, the novels are really her sole source of income and she enjoys doing them and doesn’t want to stop. She wants to know if this would be something she would need to speak with her bishop about or if she would get in trouble with the church for continuing to write them. I didn’t know the answer so I told her I’d ask you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Again using the old cliche answer...she needs to talk to her Bishop. Not sure what she could do if she has a contract. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Why doesn't she just focus on attending church again? If she hasn't been for a while, she doesn't need to "confess" to the bishop about her whole life. Now, I'm not discounting that the Spirit can be working on her and her desires to live right. I guess I don't understand what her goal would be. Would she break her contract and possibly suffer legal ramifications after her discussion with the bishop? Does she think talking to the bishop will absolve her of having any accountability of her written work, so she can continue to write her books? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ploomf Posted October 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 I'm not sure what her goals are beefche. To be honest I didn't even know she was writing these books, she writes under a pen name and since I don't read romances I have no clue who's writing them. This all came up in a conversation we had a few days ago, she mentioned she really missed church and wanted to start coming back, I told her she should come to church with me, she said she wasn't sure if she could come back, I asked why not, she told me she wrote romance novels and would probably get in trouble with the church if they knew what she did for a living but she was under contract for two more books, I made some bad jokes about romance novels in general, she threw a pillow at me, I told her she should just come anyway, it’s not like a siren would go off the moment she walked in the door and she would be tackled and hauled to the branch president for interrogation. From what she said after that I think the problem is, if she became active again she would have to talk about with her bishop at some point, especially if she is given a calling or something like that. There was also some concerns about this being a singles branch and dating but those aren’t really important to her right now. I think she’s really really scared to talk to a bishop about this but I’m not sure what else to tell her. I’ll try to convince her to just come to church again right now and worry about the rest later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 I think that's what I would focus on. There is nothing that says she has to do it all, be it all, especially just returning to church after not going for a long time. I really would tell her to do her job and at least for now, don't worry about it. Even if someone makes a stupid comment to her, tell her to blow it off (unfortunately, you know someone is likely to do that, 'cause someone is going to ask what she does for a living and she'll say she writes romance novels, then stupid people start talking stupid stuff). In fact, my personality would help her come up with some come backs to the stupid people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeekerToo Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 I don't know how racey and explicit her books are so I can't say anything about her specific situation. Just to say that there are no worthiness rules for going to church. I know several temple attending LDS women who read romance novels. ETA: We also have many temple attending members in the film industry who have done rated "R" movies. I don't see this being different (unless her books are p0rnographic). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 ETA: We also have many temple attending members in the film industry who have done rated "R" movies. I don't see this being different (unless her books are p0rnographic).Really? Who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ploomf Posted October 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 I'm not sure how racy her books are. I haven't read them but I did look it up on amazon out of curiosity and the cover has a bare chested man and half dressed woman embracing. Beefche that’s a great idea about coming up with some comebacks I’ll have to help her think of something. Well she did agree to come to church with me this Sunday when we talked so I hope it goes well. Our branch president is a really nice guy so I hope that puts her more at ease if she ever does have to talk to him about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jadams_4040 Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 So I have a friend that I've known since high school. She was very active in the church but her family were all inactive members and she didn't have a lot of support. After we graduated she moved away and stopped going to church. She says there were no real doctrinal issues with the church but she is very shy and the ward she was in wasn’t very welcoming or nice. She says going to church became more of a burden than a joy and she left feeling spiritually exhausted instead of uplifted so she just stopped going. She still obeys the word of wisdom, prays, and all that she just doesn't go to church.Well she just moved back to our town and she’d like to start going to church with me but there is one problem that she isn’t sure how to handle. Her job now. She has started writing romance novels for a living. You know the ones with the half naked people in very uncomfortable positions on the cover? Yeah those kinds of novels. She has one published, is working on her second one, and I think she said she has a contract to write two more but I’m not sure about that. She’s not sure how to handle this if she goes to church again, the novels are really her sole source of income and she enjoys doing them and doesn’t want to stop. She wants to know if this would be something she would need to speak with her bishop about or if she would get in trouble with the church for continuing to write them. I didn’t know the answer so I told her I’d ask you. Just start going is usually the first step; lets remember; the gospel is not only for perfect people actually its quite the opposite;after we start doing some right things again; the spirit will help.:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarveyWireman Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Does her contract require her to write 2 more books or 2 more half naked people books? Ever heard of Songs of Solomon? (It might not have been inspired but it might be inspiring) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Does her contract require her to write 2 more books or 2 more half naked people books? Ever heard of Songs of Solomon? (It might not have been inspired but it might be inspiring) Hey good point there and good question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 ok...so i will admit that i didnt read all of the posts, so here goes. seems to me that in order to write such a novel, your friend must have some passionate ideas about love and can communicate them.....it is a romance novel, right?..or is it just flat our porn? lets say romance...i like that better. so, your friend is passionate. the world is passionate. no denying she is writing about what happens in the world. she goes to church. struggles with her passionate/worldly love and her spiritual love that coexists side by side with it, which is every bit as passionate. --------------------------------------OR-------------------------------------------- she writes about being so passionate in the world, and niave about it, but has a sense of spiritual love as well...and thge confusion that ensues..... ----------------------OR-------------------------- the list goes on. surely there is some way that a creative and communicative mind such as hers can turn this from soft porn to spirit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ploomf Posted October 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Hmmm I'm not sure about the books she is contracted for, I'll have to ask her. That is a good idea, I almost want to pick up a copy of her book and read it to see how racy it is but a few early experiences with my mothers supply of 1980s bodice rippers means that I can't read most romances without giggling uncontrollably. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 I still say don't rush her. Take one thing at a time. She is already apprehensive about being judged (afterall she brought up talking to the bishop). Just be her friend and encourage her to go to church. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 i ABSOLUTELY agree with beefche (dang...just HOW is that pronounced). she needs to find her path to........all of it (blast, that sounds trite). as for my agreeing with beefche?.......yeah, right.....as if i'm even in the same league. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ploomf Posted October 10, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Thanks beefche. I agree with you right now she just needs to come back to church. I do know she loves her job writing romance novels, she said she's a hopeless romantic and a sucker for a happy ending. But she loves the church too and I think she feels like she needs to choose one or the other. We'll see how it goes this Sunday I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 dazed, I addressed my name here. And you're showing your name with your post. I'm a little confused at what you're trying to say.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 ok?...see?....happy ending? goes through life...passionate......about, LIFE!! but stil..out of touch with ..........with....... BLAST!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 (OOPS.....didnt mean to send that to the editor quite that fast) something......... SOMETHING ...... GREATER THAN ALL OF HER PASSION FOR LOVE...FOR LIFE...... for....TRUTH!!! and in ways, we find that greater truth. that moves us beyond our dreams. when she finds that....if she does........ how wonderful in truth will her books become? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarveyWireman Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 At least she isn't writing Bromance novels. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeekerToo Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Really? Who?Yikes! I shouldn't have used that example. Nobody in front of the camera that I know.I'll use a different example.We have a beer company near us. We have known several (more than 3) members who have worked there without it ever being an issue.I think that many lines of work can present us with choices like these. I think that is when we just need to pray about it and follow the Spirit.I also don't think you can judge a book by its cover. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miztrniceguy Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 well, I can say that I have a "friend" who also writes romance novels as well, and has published one, and is soon to publish a second, due the day after turkey day. My friend also writes under a pen name as many authors do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 Yikes! I shouldn't have used that example. Nobody in front of the camera that I know.I'll use a different example.We have a beer company near us. We have known several (more than 3) members who have worked there without it ever being an issue.I think that many lines of work can present us with choices like these. I think that is when we just need to pray about it and follow the Spirit.I also don't think you can judge a book by its cover. dont let the shortcomings of others be a guide for your life......because no one says anything doesnt make it right.we all make our choices in life...and will deal with them...no excuses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 BLAST......ok...so maybe that sounded arrogant.....didnt mean for it to. i was judging....sorry. fact is, if it came down to me providing for my family (shelter, food, medicine, etc), in all honesty.....i would do what is necessary and accept the consequences......for my love of them. wouldnt you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
will227457 Posted October 10, 2009 Report Share Posted October 10, 2009 to the OP who cares if she writes romance novels? is there stated somewere that you can't be creative even if your writing is a little provocative? and who in their right mind would judge her for it? Only a self rightious bigoted....well you get the idea She should go to church with her head held high and if someone says something to her she should tell them to pound sand! FYI some movies are rated R for language and or violance I see nothing wrong with a member of the church being in a rated "R" movie and also being worthy to enter the temple Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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