suit & tie?

[Nenad]

I know this is probably a completely trivial, if not small minded, question, but I was wondering whether it is prerequisite to dress up for church. I come from a denominational/cultural background in which ordinary (albeit decent) clothing is practically considered a norm. I don't own a suit, have never worn a tie, and as irrelevant as this may seem in the larger scheme of things, I'm curious to find out whether a suit-and-tie Sunday clothing is a must.

[Misshalfway]

Well, I tell people "Sunday best". I am not sure that means suit and tie. If one holds a priesthood calling, then the suit becomes more of a mandatory thing. But I know folks who come to church in a nice shirt tucked in with a belt and cowboy boots. No suit or tie and its all good. A nice pair of slacks with a belt and a button down would be fine.

[nbblood]

Just this Sunday, my Bishop made a passing comment about inviting people to church and said, and I paraphrase, "unless they're in something like a tank-top and flip-flops were not going to ask them to leave."

That was just a comment to point out that attire is not what is important. Sure, we wear "Sunday Best". But we also have some that come in military or security guard uniforms (not dress uniforms, work uniforms). We have one family that clearly doesn't have the same sort of attire we are accustomed to wearing. They commonly show up in jeans and t-shirts (albeit, neat appearance, it's quite simply the best they can do right now.)

The bottom line is it's more important to be there than what you are wearing. We try to dress our best in honor of the significance of meeting and worshipping God. We dress as we would in His physical presence. That means different things to different people. I'm not about to judge at all what people wear to church. I'd be happy to see them there and welcome them (unless it was something completely inappropriate, say a t-shirt with profanity or something).

I think some people wear their "best" and feel like they are underdressed according to what others are wearing which leads to embarassment and perhaps the feeling that they don't want to attend. To me this is far more tragic than somebody showing up not wearing a suit.

So, I would recommend considering what you own and deciding what you would like to wear in the presence of God. Wear that. Don't worry about what others are wearing. You may find that you decide to purchase a suit. Maybe not. Whatever. IMHO, As long as attire is not inappropriate....then it is suitable. It sounds to me like what you are considering is just fine.

[pam]

You might want to take a look at some of these threads. It's been discussed exhaustively. There might be something in those that would assist in answering your question.

http://www.lds.net/forums/lds-gospel-discussion/24731-proper-attire-sunday-meetings.html

http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/23983-ladies-yw-wearing-pants-church.html

http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/20418-proper-dress.html

[Guest mormonmusic]

It's part of our North American culture that the typical dress for men is a white shirt and tie, slacks, and dress shoes. However, it's not a hard and fast rule by any means. Non-members attend wearing colored shirts, no tie, sometimes even jeans. You can probably judge from your own locale what is typical in Church. Most of the time, people are more comfortable wearing what's typical.

I've seen a lot of harm done by being too fixated on what people wear at Church. It can be offensive to people who are new to everything to feel judged by what they wear. I never make an issue of it - except when I was a young men's leader and we had tighter standards on what a person should wear when passing, preparing or blessing the sacrament. Even then, we were sensitive to economic and cultural circumstances.

In certain areas, you wear a jacket to Priesthood meetings, or if you're a priesthood leader, you feel naked if you don't have your jacket on. In one very zion-like Ward I attended, I came out of less-activity wearing a blue shirt and a tie, and no jacket. It took two attendances at High Priest Group meeting to realize I was the only one who wasn't wearing a white shirt, tie, and jacket. And I owned one, so I started wearing it.

There are instances time and time again in the Book of Mormon about people thrown out of congregations because of the way they dressed, and it's always associated with arrogance on the part of the people who threw them out. I'd even allow flip-flops and tank tops if I was a Bishop, and the person was new.

I notice that after being exposed to the Ward for a while, and the gospel, people often make voluntary changes to their clothing and appearance without any intervention....

[Wingnut]

You might want to take a look at some of these threads. It's been discussed exhaustively. There might be something in those that would assist in answering your question.

http://www.lds.net/forums/lds-gospel-discussion/24731-proper-attire-sunday-meetings.html

http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/23983-ladies-yw-wearing-pants-church.html

http://www.lds.net/forums/general-discussion/20418-proper-dress.html

Thanks. My thoughts exactly, but I didn't want to look them up.

[beefche]

Nenad, I notice you are from Yugoslavia. I served a mission in Bulgaria. My experience on my mission was that most men did not wear a suit/tie. They came dressed nice (slacks with nice shirt), but no tie. Some of the men were businessmen who had suits and they wore them, but most men did not.

Also, as stated previously, there is some requirement for priesthood holders in leadership position and/or passing sacrament, but they were a little more flexible in Bulgaria due to culture/finances.

So, don't worry about your attire. Just attend church and serve faithfully.

[Nenad]

Thank you all for your responses!

[dazed-and-confused]

I have lived in Arizona, USA, where sunday best meant clean cloths....

In My Humble Opinion......if you do your best to live by the Word, striving to be in the Light.....do you REALLY think you will be denied because you didn't wear a suit to church?

[Nenad]

do you REALLY think you will be denied because you didn't wear a suit to church?

I didn't exactly put my original question in such strong terms, although I can see how you could infer that. No, I just wanted to know to what extent is suit and tie something expected, even if not explicity asked for. I just wanted to get some feedback on this.

[mrmarklin]

I know this is probably a completely trivial, if not small minded, question, but I was wondering whether it is prerequisite to dress up for church. I come from a denominational/cultural background in which ordinary (albeit decent) clothing is practically considered a norm. I don't own a suit, have never worn a tie, and as irrelevant as this may seem in the larger scheme of things, I'm curious to find out whether a suit-and-tie Sunday clothing is a must.

Frankly, I'm trying to get away from it. I live and work near Silicon Valley where no one is wearing such attire. I wore suit and tie to work until 2000, when our firm (CPAs) decided not to fight it anymore! Not even our banker wore a tie, and certainly none of our clients.

I wear expensive brand casual clothing, and on and off I wear it to work. Gave all my suits away, and had to buy one for my daughter's wedding in October! It will be my last suit. I haven't worn a jacket to chuch in years, and when I'm travelling and visit a ward I never wear a tie, because I don't travel that way anymore. Very close to getting rid of the last vestige of accursed Beau Brummel...the tie!!!!

[mrmarklin]

I know this is probably a completely trivial, if not small minded, question, but I was wondering whether it is prerequisite to dress up for church. I come from a denominational/cultural background in which ordinary (albeit decent) clothing is practically considered a norm. I don't own a suit, have never worn a tie, and as irrelevant as this may seem in the larger scheme of things, I'm curious to find out whether a suit-and-tie Sunday clothing is a must.

Frankly, I'm trying to get away from it. I live and work near Silicon Valley where no one is wearing such attire. I wore suit and tie to work until 2000, when our firm (CPAs) decided not to fight it anymore! Not even our banker wore a tie, and certainly none of our clients.

I wear expensive brand casual clothing, and on and off I wear it to work. If I'm not seeing clients, I wear jeans. Gave all my suits away, and had to buy one for my daughter's wedding in October! It will be my last suit. I haven't worn a jacket to chuch in years, and when I'm travelling and visit a ward I never wear a tie, because I don't travel that way anymore. Very close to getting rid of the last vestige of accursed Beau Brummel...the tie!!!!

[ozzy]

My step dad wears jeans. And he hates suits. I don't think he even owns one. But he definitely could if he wanted to, so I will just add my meek testimony to those who have gone before me that you will be just fine.

[Carl62]

I always wear a nice suitcoat, shirt and pants, but as for the tie? I am rapidly getting away from them for one simple reason - I just can't stand them!!!

[Elphaba]

I haven't been a member for over two decades now, and the answers to the OP shock me more than any historical or doctrinal issues that have evolved since then. When I was still a member there was no question about it--men wore suits and ties and women wore dresses.

In the '70s I had a roomate who was a convert and very upset she could not wear a nice pantsuit to church. I have always felt guilty because I was visibly shocked she'd even consider wearing a pantsuit, and very arrogant in the way I told her she must wear a skirt. I was only 17 at the time, so I give myself a break on that account.

But I want to ask, is it still a died-in-the-wool requirement that women wear skirts? If men are able to go without suits and ties, has the "must wear a skirt" rule eased up? If people are saying someone can wear a t-shirt to church, certainly a nice pantsuit is allowed?

Elphaba

[hordak]

I haven't been a member for over two decades now, and the answers to the OP shock me more than any historical or doctrinal issues that have evolved since then. When I was still a member there was no question about it--men wore suits and ties and women wore dresses.

In the '70s I had a roomate who was a convert and very upset she could not wear a nice pantsuit to church. I have always felt guilty because I was visibly shocked she'd even consider wearing a pantsuit, and very arrogant in the way I told her she must wear a skirt. I was only 17 at the time, so I give myself a break on that account.

But I want to ask, is it still a died-in-the-wool requirement that women wear skirts? If men are able to go without suits and ties, has the "must wear a skirt" rule eased up? If people are saying someone can wear a t-shirt to church, certainly a nice pantsuit is allowed?

Elphaba

It is not a rule. It is culture. My mother was a member for 30 some years and wore a skirt maybe once every 3 months. She went to worship God, not to fit in.

I'm not saying those who dress up aren't worshiping, but for her it was more important to be comfortable and focus on the message then to spend the day worrying about her clothes.

Same reason i don't wear a white shirt or tie. I can spend the sacrament meeting trying not to choke on my tie and fighting to keep the kids "snack hands", and crayons off my clean white shirt. Or i can focus on the talks.

[Carl62]

It is not a rule. It is culture. My mother was a member for 30 some years and wore a skirt maybe once every 3 months. She went to worship God, not to fit in.

I'm not saying those who dress up aren't worshiping, but for her it was more important to be comfortable and focus on the message then to spend the day worrying about her clothes.

Same reason i don't wear a white shirt or tie. I can spend the sacrament meeting trying not to choke on my tie and fighting to keep the kids "snack hands", and crayons off my clean white shirt. Or i can focus on the talks.

I sometimes think we tend to place more emphasis on our outward appearance a lot more than what we should. When Judgement Day comes, I sincerely believe we will be judged by the contents of our hearts and not by how pressed our suits were in church. I guess this is a bit of a sore spot for me because while on my mission, if members would have judged some of the missionaries that I was around by merely their outward appearance, they would have thought they were the most upstanding, spiritual, righteous people there were. Yet I was around some missionaries who were breaking missionary rules left and right including having girlfriends within the mission boundaries (yes physical!), unhooking odometer cables in their cars just so they could go into the neighboring country, zone leaders picking up reports in nothing more than swim trunks and hurrying us up so that they could get to the beach on time, constantly made up numbers on reports over tracting hours, and on and on and on I could go. I find it very interesting and ironic how if our very own Savior were to attend one of our Sacrament meetings, He would not only not be allowed to pass His very own Sacrament, but He would be looked down on and very possibly even be shunned by the very members of His own church. All simply because of the way His hair and clothing is. Very sad.

[john doe]

I sometimes think we tend to place more emphasis on our outward appearance a lot more than what we should. When Judgement Day comes, I sincerely believe we will be judged by the contents of our hearts and not by how pressed our suits were in church. I guess this is a bit of a sore spot for me because while on my mission, if members would have judged some of the missionaries that I was around by merely their outward appearance, they would have thought they were the most upstanding, spiritual, righteous people there were. Yet I was around some missionaries who were breaking missionary rules left and right including having girlfriends within the mission boundaries (yes physical!), unhooking odometer cables in their cars just so they could go into the neighboring country, zone leaders picking up reports in nothing more than swim trunks and hurrying us up so that they could get to the beach on time, constantly made up numbers on reports over tracting hours, and on and on and on I could go. I find it very interesting and ironic how if our very own Savior were to attend one of our Sacrament meetings, He would not only not be allowed to pass His very own Sacrament, but He would be looked down on and very possibly even be shunned by the very members of His own church. All simply because of the way His hair and clothing is. Very sad.

Call for references.

[pam]

That argument gets very old. It started with the old argument that Brigham Young probably wouldn't be able to attend BYU due to his beard.

The sad part to that argument..if Christ were to show up in one of our sacrament meetings and was shunned..that doesn't say much about our relationship with him does it? That he would not be recognized? I would find that even more tragic.

[Vanhin]

I've been a member for all of my 36 years, and have been in various wards and branches in different parts of America, Canada, and Finland . It varies from culture to culture. Most people "dress up", whether it's a suit and tie, or just a white shirt and tie, or a nice collar shirt without a tie and some slacks, or a pair of jeans, a western shirt, a big belt buckle, boots, and a bolo tie (I see that quite a bit in Colorado).

In Finland, I saw many folks come to Church with a suit and white socks and bed head...

People will be happy that you came for a visit regardless of your attire, unless you wear something obviously offensive. I'm pretty confident about that. For sure, you won't be out of place if you own a suit and you want to wear it. If you don't have one, anything neat and clean will work.

Regards,

Vanhin

[Misshalfway]

I thought the rule was "wear your Sunday best" and that means the best you got in your closet. Our culture does interfer sometimes but if you looked at the church worldwide, I think you'd see lots of variety. The church doesn't want people to have to break the bank so they have a nice suit. But if people do have the money, I think the church does try to set mild standards. In our US culture, Sunday dress usually means a skirt or a dress shirt. In another place it might be your best Lava-lava and sandals.

Suits are usually expected for priesthood leaders such as bishops/SP's and skirts for the RS pres. White shirts are suggested for the boys who pass the sacrament. The only other thing I hear about is the length of skirts in YW's.

I have been to church in jeans before while on vacation. It doesn't matter as much as we all think it does.

[Lilac]

We are just visiting the LDS ward.

Most men were in a white shirt, blue pants and a tie. No suit jackets except on the Bishop.

[WillowTheWhisp]

In our Ward all the men and boys wear suits, whiteshirt and tie. All the women wear dresses or skirts below the knee. Our Bishop once commented on someone wearing a pale blue shirt as not being church standard - and yet President Uchtdorf has said he would rather have people come to church dressed casually than not come to church.

[Nikkie85]

My hubby is the EQP and he has to be clean shaven and wear a white shirt and tie every time he goes to church or is conducting church business. On Sundays he wears his suit with a white shirt and tie. This is at the request of our bishop. Hubby only has one suit but he religiously wears it every Sunday. I have only been a member for three years and the first time I went to Church my husband said that I HAD to wear a skirt. Honestly I thought it was kinda of sexist but now I could care less. I wear a skirt or dress every Sunday with out question. I have always been told you should wear your Sundays best...for some that is a Chanel skirt and for others it is a worn in pair of jeans. Most of our investigators come in jeans or dress pants and they are still given a warm welcome. I think dressing up is a sign of respect and reverence. Taking the sacarement is one of the most important things I do during the week. I dress up for work and dinner with the hubby so why would I not have the same respect for my savior? I am the Mia Maids adviser and I wish so badly that my girls would be more modest. I amazes me how their parents let them leave the house!

[Blackmarch]

I know this is probably a completely trivial, if not small minded, question, but I was wondering whether it is prerequisite to dress up for church. I come from a denominational/cultural background in which ordinary (albeit decent) clothing is practically considered a norm. I don't own a suit, have never worn a tie, and as irrelevant as this may seem in the larger scheme of things, I'm curious to find out whether a suit-and-tie Sunday clothing is a must.

No it's not a pre-req, however it is taught to dress in respectful manner as we believe when we gather together as followers of Christ his spirit will be with us, and when we worship God that we draw near unto him.

No one should ask you about your clothes (unless its really immodest or something, in which case it should be one of the leaders).

Currently a suit and tie is generally what is viewed as both respectful and professional attire, and also provides a unity of sorts.

If you don't have a suit and tie that isn't a problem one bit, just come dressed in respectful manner.... if i was in your shoes, for me that would mean clean clothes, subdued colors, no holes. I know that in various wards i have had men offer to let me use an an extra tie they brought to church if I didn't have one on.. so you could probably get help in that regards... and if you'd really like to use a suit, ask around see if anyone knows anybody who has one that they'd be willing to let you borrow.