Would you, could you? Multiple wives and husbands.....


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When I was an investigator, the RS President at my first Ward and I became fairly close friends. I took many of the missionary lessons at her house. I got to know her and her husband very well. At one point, I had read some of the anti-Mormon stuff on the internet while doing some research. It discussed polygamy. The next day, the RS President had invited me to her house for dinner, then to watch a movie. I asked them about polygamy and we ended up having an informative discussion about it. Several days later, she told me that I am one of the few women she would share her husband with, were polygamy commanded. If I were told I had to marry into a polygamous marriage, I would be ok with that family. I think it comes down to relationships. I liked her husband and respected him. I consider him a friend. He respects me and likes me- we're friends. It would take serious communication and interpersonal skills to get a polygamous marriage to work where one spouse does not feel neglected or hurt. If you think about it, marriages between one man and one woman fail at an alarming rate. Now, add in a third, fourth, or fifth person.... The relationship would be incredibly difficult. I think the marriages would have to be between people who had strong friendships and good communication skills prior.

Just my .02.

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Elphaba may know the numbers, but it was always my understanding that the majority of the church in the 1800s did not have multiple wives. I'm thinking like less than 10% were polygamous.

It was closer to twenty percent, but still a small minority of the total LDS popuation.

Elphaba

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Sorry for my bad English!

I wonder every time this kind of questions are posed. It seem to me like asking if I would be confortable on killing someone. Nefi does it, Joshua does it, ecc. ecc.

Yes I'm not willing to kill, not to go into plurimariage, no into divorce, ecc.

If God will comand I'll obey, not fear not pain. *If, and only if, God will ask to me.

Sorry again for my English. If I could express my thoughs in Italian probably I would be less sharp and concise.

So don't be afraid with me.:)

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Sorry for my bad English!

If I could express my thoughs in Italian probably I would be less sharp and concise.

So don't be afraid with me.:)

Buon giorno come stai? :)

It is great to 'meet' someone from Italy. My father's family all came from the north of Italy - Piedmont and Lombardia. They emigrated to the cane fields of QLD Australia in the 1910's & 1920's. I am proud of my Italian ancestry and would love to go to Italy someday. Dream dream dream!! :)

I am not afraid of how you say things in English, you did well. I don't speak Italian only what I learnt at school and that wasn't much. Thank you for your comments.

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Grazie. Potevo risolvere che cosa avete scritto me ma deve essere molto molto di base - come che cosa i piccoli bambini direbbero. Vorrei leggere la tribuna italiana ma ho bisogno di un traduttore in linea di aiutarlo e sto usando uno ora per scrivere voi in modo da spero che questo abbia tutto il significato voi.

Grazie

Thank you.

I was able to work out what you wrote to me :) but it has to be very very basic - like what little children would say. :confused:

I would like to read the Italian forum but I need an online translater to help me and I am using one to write to you now so I hope this will make any sense to you.

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I don't know how I would honestly feel if my husband was commanded to take on a second wife. I love him so much and think that I would be devastated to see him cuddle and talk to someone the same way he does me.

This is kinda off subject but I think it is funny that the same people who typically support gay marriage are outraged by polygamy! Homosexuality is pretty much socially acceptable but mention someone having two wives and the claws come out.

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I don't know how I would honestly feel if my husband was commanded to take on a second wife. I love him so much and think that I would be devastated to see him cuddle and talk to someone the same way he does me.

This is kinda off subject but I think it is funny that the same people who typically support gay marriage are outraged by polygamy! Homosexuality is pretty much socially acceptable but mention someone having two wives and the claws come out.

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Something Vanhin said sparked a question within me....

If the Church came out today and officially sanctioned plural marriage in any form (polygamy - either polygyny or polyandry) again....how many of you would feel comfortable going out and taking to yourself another wife or husband....or two or three or four....?

Would you do it because it was ok? Would you hesitate anyway? Would you jump at the chance?

I know Pam will be happy with only her Shemar Moore, but what about the rest of you? :lol:

COmfortable with? no.. but then God takes us out of or comfort zones many times.

Would I do it? If recieved instruction to do it, then yes I would hope that I'd have the strength to do it.

Would I jump at the chance? no

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I know that I don't post here much and haven't gotten very personal about my past but you all are about to "hear" more than you probably wanted to know.

Back in my late teens/early twenties, at the height of my rebellion towards God and any religious teaching of any type I had a polygamy marriage. Well kinda, technically he was only legally married to me but I did have a "sister wife" so to speak. She lived with us, helped with the children, helped with the house and yes I shared my husband, physically and emotionally with her. She was unable to have children so the only children in the house were my three kids. Although her and I got along and had a "good" relationship the damage it did to my husband and our relationship was severe.

I know there are going to be those who argue "well it was not ordained or commanded and that is why it didn't work." Even if it had been God ordained we are humans, with human feelings and human hearts. You cannot share something as powerful and as intimate as a marriage with another without there being serious ramifications to the spirit of those involved.

I would seriously doubt anyone who said that God had ordained and or command me to have such a marriage again. It is really easy to say what you "think" you would do or what you could handle.

I will say this if my current husband came to me and said God had ordained or command him to have mutliple wives I'd be out that door in a hot minute and not ever look back!!!

Edited by Loving_Wife
typo's
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Something Vanhin said sparked a question within me....

If the Church came out today and officially sanctioned plural marriage in any form (polygamy - either polygyny or polyandry) again....how many of you would feel comfortable going out and taking to yourself another wife or husband....or two or three or four....?

Would you do it because it was ok? Would you hesitate anyway? Would you jump at the chance?

What I find to be very interesting: The vast majority of the men who were asked to live this principal were not the least bit interested in having more wives. Brigham Young, Joseph Smith and Heber C Kimball all struggled mightily with the idea. It seems to me that this was what made it a true test of their faith. The same can be said of Abraham and Jacob. Abraham didn't want to take any wives other than Sarah but God commanded otherwise.

I think any man or woman who actually wants another spouse is completely missing the point.

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