Masturbation / Pornography in the past?


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I'm a 20 year old male preparing to serve a mission. I used to be addicted to porn (I would watch it / masturbate 2-3 times per week) but have since stopped watching pornography and masturbation. I have repented and prayed, but my question is do I still need to talk with my bishop? Can I talk about it with my stake president if I'm more comfortable with that? Or is prayer and repentance sufficent?

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Guest mormonmusic

I'd tell the Bishop. It'll feel better to go to the Stake President free of any needd confession, having taken care of it with the Bishop previously. You'll appear less repentent if you DON'T tell the Bishop, then only come out with it to the Stake President, or worse yet,your MTC branch or mission president, or worse yet, your in-the-field Mission President.

Come clean at the first opportunty and then leave it behind forever....

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Masturbation is a form of sexual gratification, and thereby in violation of remaining chaste and pure.

Masturbation: “As boys and girls reach physical maturity, curiosity in one’s body may result in self-stimulation (masturbation)” (Relief Society Courses of Study [1972–73], p. 203).

The world rationalizes that masturbation is natural and healthy. However, President Spencer W. Kimball states the Lord’s view as follows: “Prophets anciently and today condemn masturbation. It induces feelings of guilt and shame. It is detrimental to spirituality. It indicates slavery to the flesh, not that mastery of it and the growth toward godhood which is the object of our mortal life. … No young man should be called on a mission who is not free from this practice.” (The Miracle of Forgiveness, p. 77.)

Pornography: “There are magazines today publishing pictures and articles which … beckon to the baser instincts of men and women and young people. There are newspapers around the world which, seeking greater circulation, boldly flaunt sex. Some of our newspapers continue to publish illustrated advertisements which are basely provocative, inviting their readers to pornographic motion pictures. It is in such advertisements and motion pictures where seeds are sown for rape, unfaithfulness, and the most repulsive of deviant sexual transgressions.” (Spencer W. Kimball, in Conference Report, Apr. 1978, p. 67; or Ensign, May 1978, p. 45.)

Therefore, this is not a typical transgression that you can "pray" as a personal form of confession. In fact, if you have ever gone and done baptisms for the dead, and the Bishop had asked you, "have you ever masturbated" and you answered no, when you have, then it is even more prudent to go in and confess to your Bishop. Not only for the act itself, but also for lying and entering into the temple on false pretenses, knowing you were committing an act of transgression.

However, the choice is entirely up to you whether you want to go into your bishop and talk with him.

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There is no doubt in my mind that porn addiction / self abuse should be confessed to a bishop. The church has raised the bar with regards to missionary service. I think they have a right to know your sexual history and they most likely with ask very direct questions to determine it. And you may feel that you have absolutely overcome this compulsion and if you have, I couldn't be happier for you. But the one thing I know about PA is that it thrives in darkness and secrecy. Do yourself and your future a favor. Tell the bishop just because you know that bringing it into the light will lessen Satan's ability to use it against you later. Satan is so good at getting people to believe we can repent/change this problem on their own. That is part of how he keeps his meat hooks in you. Too many returned missionaries have thought they had it beat only to find those ugly behaviors waiting to pounce on them when they got home. Don't let that horrid cycle of contrition and failure happen to you.

Tell your bishop. If you truly have repented, then you shouldn't have any trouble owning it. IF you still feel intense fear and shame, remember that part of the healing process is banishing the shame from your soul. PA thrives on shame too. Confession is good for the soul. This is partly why.

Good luck. Best wishes to you.

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I don't recall the bishop ever asking me this. Is it a new question? I only remember being asked if I obeyed the Law of Chastity.

Masturbation and viewing pornography both break the law of chastity, so you would have had to answer no to this. This question does not only cover current obedience but all past disobedience. I had problems with maturbation and pornography which I have since repented of, so when I am asked this question I answer that I have broken the Law of Chastity but went through the repentance process and have since remained clean.

You cannot be fully repentant without confession. Confession must include telling all those you wronged with such action. Porn and masterbation do not involve anyone else, so many believe they need only confess between themselves and the Lord. This is wrong, though. You have also committed a wrong against the church because you broke a standard you claim to uphold. In doing this you are misrepresenting yourself to the church. This is another reason it is necessary to confess to your Bishop. Your Bishop can help you determine what you can do to make restitution as well, another necessary part of repentance.

Repentance is far more than just quitting the wrong thing you are doing. In order to really clean your slate, it is important to confess this to your Bishop so that he may help you complete the repentance process.

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Judo's comments reminded me what the MTC is like. I think in my first week there they must have talked about confessing sins and repentance like a million times! And the priesthood who lead each district of missionaries often use scouring pads in their weekly interviews too.

Don't you think its kind to yourself to go into the mission with no question marks in the back of your mind? So when the pressure cooker aspects of the mission experience come your guilt won't be there to torment you?

Confess! Confess! Confess! To help you do your best!

( oh no. Now I am starting to talk cheerleader. :cool:)

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Tell your Bishop....you will feel better, because you won't have to wonder anymore. I suspect many young men have masturbated as a young teen and have never confessed. However, the combination of pornography and masturbation is different. It suggests an addiction that might not be fully forsaken.

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You cannot be fully repentant without confession. Confession must include telling all those you wronged with such action. Porn and masterbation do not involve anyone else, so many believe they need only confess between themselves and the Lord. This is wrong, though. You have also committed a wrong against the church because you broke a standard you claim to uphold. In doing this you are misrepresenting yourself to the church. This is another reason it is necessary to confess to your Bishop. Your Bishop can help you determine what you can do to make restitution as well, another necessary part of repentance.

Repentance is far more than just quitting the wrong thing you are doing. In order to really clean your slate, it is important to confess this to your Bishop so that he may help you complete the repentance process.

I'm going to have to disagree. If you had to confess to the Bishop anytime you broke a church standard there would be a line filling the hallways. Claim to uphold the Priesthood, but didn't , take the calling, do home teaching, read the BoM everyday, saw a rated r movie, missed FHE etc etc. go see the Bishop.

Now in this case the OP is bothered by it the best action would be to get it of his chest and speak with the Bishop. But breaking church standards doesn't equal wronging the church, you can't really wrong the church as it is just a representative of God, hence you wrong God.

To reiterate i'm not saying he shouldn't see the Bishop, but if failing to meet the church standards is wronging the church then we are all in trouble.

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This is wrong, though. You have also committed a wrong against the church because you broke a standard you claim to uphold. In doing this you are misrepresenting yourself to the church.

Maybe he meant breaking a covenant. I took his comment to mean breaking the law of chastity.

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Maybe he meant breaking a covenant. I took his comment to mean breaking the law of chastity.

Yes halfway. I meant covenant and I just used the wrong word. The Law of Chasitity is far more than a standard, it is a covenant. The standards are the little things that help keep us on the right path and while it is important not to break them, as they will guide us and protect us, I know everyone does a little breaking and it is not a requirement for us to tell the bishop about every little thing we do wrong.

The fact that this is a wrong committed against the church is in The Miracle of Forgiveness. As a member, we are to keep the Law of Chastity and treat it with the same importance and sacredness as all the other commandments and the Word of Wisdom. Part of the reason a confession to the bishop is necessary is because the church has also been wronged.

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While circumstance vary I'm fairly confident, unless you are not telling us something (which is fine) that it'll come to that. Can you even be stripped of your priesthood without being excommunicated. Though he may tell you not to perform any ordinances for a while. Once again, depends on the details.

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Alright, thanks for that clarification. A member who is one of my home teaching families is actually was stripped of the priesthood and dis-fellowshipped for commiting adultery which is a sexual sin. I thought it this might have been in that same area of consequence. The meeting with my bishop is in a little under 2 hours, I hope it doesn't go too poorly.

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non realease of sperm in males increases the risk of prostate cancer .

a happy interaction with females is healthy , reducing the need for masturbation .

pornograpy is in poor taste , derogatory to human sexuality and the beauty of romance .

young people should not be made to feel guilty about what is a natural process but should be advised on how to promote normal happy sexual relationships .

so many young lds are in such a mess about their sexual identity , even to the point of becoming suicidal ....

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Yes halfway. I meant covenant and I just used the wrong word. The Law of Chasitity is far more than a standard, it is a covenant. The standards are the little things that help keep us on the right path and while it is important not to break them, as they will guide us and protect us, I know everyone does a little breaking and it is not a requirement for us to tell the bishop about every little thing we do wrong.

The fact that this is a wrong committed against the church is in The Miracle of Forgiveness. As a member, we are to keep the Law of Chastity and treat it with the same importance and sacredness as all the other commandments and the Word of Wisdom. Part of the reason a confession to the bishop is necessary is because the church has also been wronged.

The Miracle of Forgiveness is not Mormon Doctrine, neither is Mormon Doctrine for that matter, and while it has been a while since i was Baptized and i can't find an official source this sounds right

Baptismal interview

* Do you believe in God and Jesus Christ?

* Do you believe in the restoration of the gospel? Do you believe that the current LDS church president is a prophet of God?

* Do you feel that you have repented of serious past transgressions? (This includes crimes, abortions, and homosexual relationships.)

* Do you understand and are you willing to obey the law of chastity?

* Do you understand and are you willing to obey the law of tithing?

* Do you understand and are you willing to obey the word of wisdom?

* Do you understand and are you willing to keep the Sabbath day holy?

* Are you ready to make the covenant of baptism and strive to be faithful to it all your life?

Are these other things not covenants? Would you "mandate" a confession to the Bishop for breaking the Sabbath?

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Are these other things not covenants? Would you "mandate" a confession to the Bishop for breaking the Sabbath?

I do not mean to sound like I am mandating anything, and I am sorry if I come off that way. During an interview like that, it is of course important to be truthful, so if you are breaking the sabbath I would say yes it should be confessed to the Bishop. This wouldn't be something you need to go and make an appointment with him for though.

The point I am trying to make is that ANY sexual sin is a serious sin that the prophets have counseled us countless times to confess to our bishops, because a sin of this gravity cannot be repented of on our own. We need the help our bishop can offer.

As far as what will happen to you prepare, these things are all very individualized. At the very least you will be put on what is called informal probation, and your bishop will let you know which things he wants you to abstain from (like prayers in church, partaking of the sacrament, bearing your testimony, etc) until this is cleared up. Your mission papers could very possibly be pushed back for awhile, as a mission is treated very much like a temple-worthiness interview and you would not be considered temple worthy until you have completed your repentance process.

The amount of time this takes also varies. Some complete the process in as short as a couple months if they've already been on the right track for awhile and just needed to get a last few things cleared up. Others can take years.

Most importantly, it depends on when you truly feel that you've done everything you need to complete the process, and your bishop will help you identify everything so you know you aren't missing anything. When you've done this, you will feel the Lord's forgiveness and your sins will trouble you no more.

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I'm a 20 year old male preparing to serve a mission. I used to be addicted to porn (I would watch it / masturbate 2-3 times per week) but have since stopped watching pornography and masturbation. I have repented and prayed, but my question is do I still need to talk with my bishop? Can I talk about it with my stake president if I'm more comfortable with that? Or is prayer and repentance sufficent?

If you still have a question about it, definitely ask your bishop- he is set as a judge in zion.

To me personally sounds like you've done what you needed to.

Edited by Blackmarch
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I do not mean to sound like I am mandating anything, and I am sorry if I come off that way. During an interview like that, it is of course important to be truthful, so if you are breaking the sabbath I would say yes it should be confessed to the Bishop. This wouldn't be something you need to go and make an appointment with him for though.

The point I am trying to make is that ANY sexual sin is a serious sin that the prophets have counseled us countless times to confess to our bishops, because a sin of this gravity cannot be repented of on our own. We need the help our bishop can offer.

As far as what will happen to you prepare, these things are all very individualized. At the very least you will be put on what is called informal probation, and your bishop will let you know which things he wants you to abstain from (like prayers in church, partaking of the sacrament, bearing your testimony, etc) until this is cleared up. Your mission papers could very possibly be pushed back for awhile, as a mission is treated very much like a temple-worthiness interview and you would not be considered temple worthy until you have completed your repentance process.

The amount of time this takes also varies. Some complete the process in as short as a couple months if they've already been on the right track for awhile and just needed to get a last few things cleared up. Others can take years.

Most importantly, it depends on when you truly feel that you've done everything you need to complete the process, and your bishop will help you identify everything so you know you aren't missing anything. When you've done this, you will feel the Lord's forgiveness and your sins will trouble you no more.

I don't think you mandated it, just didn't have a better term, hence the quote marks.It wasn't aimed at you directly. I just don't understand why people see breaking this covenant worse then any other.

Brother Jones breaks the sabbath every week, people say , you shouldn't do that, offer suggestions on how to avoid it, bust out the scriptures etc etc.

Brother Smith looks at porn once, people say you must get to the bishop and repent.

I suppose it could be because Chastity is well defined in the church where as Keeping the Sabbath day holy is more vague. But i really don't see the difference and think confession to Priesthood authority would rest on the individual, i.e. if you have a habitual problem (be it breaking the sabbath, porn, gambling addiction etc) or if moved by the spirit, then take it to the Bishop. But if you wouldn't feel the need to run to the Bishop when you bought a lotto ticket or broke the sabbath once , i would see no reason to him for a one time chastity issue.

Again in this situation it is warranted, if i was preparing for a mission i would want to go with a clean slate and would probably tell about the time i put gum in Susie's hair;)

I just don't subscribe to the idea that breaking covenants is a sin against the church and therefor need to be forgiven by the church (Sounds kinda Catholic) or that certain covenants "mean more" (so to speak) and therefor must be taken to the church while others are worked out among you and God.

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