harleylds Posted February 16, 2010 Report Share Posted February 16, 2010 Hello LDS Forum, This is my first time posting on this site; so hopefully you can give me some advice on the Sealing Cancellation topic. I was previously married to my Ex-Wife for five years and have been divorced from her mutually since June 08'. She recently called me this weekend to give me a head's up that my Bishop would be contacting me with her wishes to get our Sealing Cancelled. Now, I don't have one issue with this; as I am not in love with her, and have found a new sweetie that we have been dating for a year. The problem I have is that at the end of our marriage she was talking to another man online that she knew growing up for her hometown. She would lock herself in our bedroom and talk to this person on the phone for hours, and would send emails everyday "as friends". Well, let's just say that three weeks before we were officially divorced she already had her wedding dress picked out to marry the man she was talking to on the phone. Then, was married to him immediately after our divorce in her Bishop's office. I found out later she was talking to him for months after I tried to go to counseling with her, but we just couldn't make it work. My question is how do I write a response letter to the First Presidency when I receive hers that would depict her lack of taking our temple vows seriously and having an emotional affair with a man clear across the country while still being married. I plan on marrying my sweetie in a few years, and want to not be sealed to that wretched woman. Should I bring all this up in the letter, and make the point to say I want it cancelled just as much!? What will her letter say? I hope all this makes sense, but I don't want to come across as bitter/that I still love her. Since I do NOT! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted February 16, 2010 Report Share Posted February 16, 2010 (edited) Wouldn't the emotional adultery be something for her Bishop and Stake President to worry about (as opposed to the First Presidency)? Honestly I have no clue what goes into that kind of letter, have you considered asking some local leadership? Edited February 16, 2010 by Dravin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wisc Posted February 16, 2010 Report Share Posted February 16, 2010 If I were in your shoes...and felt about the situation as you feel about the situation... I guess I would reply with the truth. Do not sugar coat it and do not add unneeded spice. Explain the circumstances of the divorce. Present the truth in its most plain and fair form. And then at the end let them know if you agree or disagree to a cancellation. In the end though its between the Lord and her. I would only include hard truths in the letter so as to better enable the proper priesthood leaders to make the decision that Heavenly Father desires in this situation. This may be a chance for you to truly forgive and forget for yourself friend. And the above is sort of a lie... thats how I would react in YOUR shoes. If it were me in my own shoes, well, there would be lots of cursing followed by riotous laughter, followed by a letter saying something that would get me called into the bishops office. You're a much bigger man than me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rameumptom Posted February 16, 2010 Report Share Posted February 16, 2010 Explain the situation to the Bishop in your letter, then let him know that you will leave it up to the Bishop to decide what to do, that you are not going to hold it up. That way, the information is passed along, but the Bishop decides. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laureltree Posted February 17, 2010 Report Share Posted February 17, 2010 I just finished my letter, Im getting sealed in Sep. My bishop told me to be honest, tell everything from when you met to where you are now...They will look over both letters. Your letter is not a deciding factor on her getting sealed, its just information....The deciding factor will be her bishop, stake pres, and her letter, and attendence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harleylds Posted February 17, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2010 Thanks everyone for your advice. Now, she will never see my letter I write and vice versa? Will I have to do my own cancellation of the sealing with I am engaged to my girlfriend? ) Congrats LaurelTree on your set date! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mysticmorini Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Thanks everyone for your advice. Now, she will never see my letter I write and vice versa? Will I have to do my own cancellation of the sealing with I am engaged to my girlfriend? ) Congrats LaurelTree on your set date! no a cancelation goes both ways and as a matter of fact men are not required to cancel their sealings as long as he has been divorced he can be sealed to as many women as he can trick into marring him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harleylds Posted February 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Haha, well mysticmorini...I definitely don't want to be sealed to my ex for time and all eternity; so it's a positive thing. ) My girlfriend has also agreed she would rather be the only one sealed to me, and I agree with her statement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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